Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 ThePig0fYourDreams
Joined: 2/2/2015
Msg: 2652
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?Page 83 of 87    (47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87)

I think it's absolutely shameful that people expect pics.


Oh, boy. It looks like we have a rockin trucker disciple here.

You can try to make people feel guilty for wanting physical attraction, but you're ultimately going to fail.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 2653
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 6/15/2015 5:52:02 AM

I've met people that had no pics posted, though it never worked out. I was fine with it because I don't care about looks.


Well you're 29, never been in a relationship, live at home, a gamer, don't go anywhere, don't do anything, your family are hoarders and your occupation is misery.

So yeah, sounds reasonable that you would'nt care I suppose.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/18/2015
Msg: 2654
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 6/15/2015 10:15:07 AM

I think it's absolutely shameful that people expect pics.
It's privacy reasons, or people that don't want someone shallow. If you expect pics, you're shallow.

I've met people that had no pics posted, though it never worked out. I was fine with it because I don't care about looks.


Of course you care about looks.
And others do as well.
It's not shallow...it's called preferences.
Dating is about choices.

Unless you have no choices.
And no options.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 2655
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 6/15/2015 11:17:47 AM

How are you supposed to know if there is attraction there or not then?


Photos can be exchanged at any time during the process.


Also if you arrange to meet how are you going to recognise them?


Wear a red carnation.
 chrisshrew
Joined: 6/13/2007
Msg: 2656
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 6/15/2015 2:17:33 PM


How are you supposed to know if there is attraction there or not then?

Photos can be exchanged at any time during the process.

Also if you arrange to meet how are you going to recognise them?

Wear a red carnation.


Sending photos by email when they aren't available through the dating website seems a bit weird to me. Dating can be hard work as it is without having to put it into getting a photo. As for the second point I don't think you understood the question lol. Recognise them not they recognise you.
 SLAFFA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 2657
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 6/20/2015 11:47:22 AM
Sure. Why not?

Being OPEN MINDED at ANY Online dating site is THE simple key to having success.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 2658
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 11/29/2015 2:20:38 AM
bosslady
I think you were very lucky with the pilot. I imagine that mostly if there is no pic there is definitely something to hide and I hope your hottie is not actually married or in a relationship.
 Lasthookbringsme
Joined: 11/8/2015
Msg: 2659
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 11/29/2015 3:37:41 AM

Being OPEN MINDED at ANY Online dating site is THE simple key to having success.


That works in some circumstances. It might be adventurous!
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 2660
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 11/29/2015 12:02:42 PM

Oh, boy. It looks like we have a rockin trucker disciple here.

You can try to make people feel guilty for wanting physical attraction, but you're ultimately going to fail.


but you don't know if there is attraction JUST from a pic; since you don't know a how recent it is, b what the "vibe" is going to be like with them and c: if you both like and want the same things.

I have had people with gorgeous pics who were way different in life and people with no pics that were gorgeous in life; and people who were gorgeous in both where there was no chemistry at all, or we were wanting totally different things.

if there is a ton in common, conversation flows easily and you are attracted to the person themselves, then meeting in real life; even if there is not physical atraction; it can still be an enjoyable outing; and sometimes there is a hugely pleassant surprise. (either non photogenic or no pic at all turns out to be droolworthy in person, or mentally droolworthy.

never know unless you try. but if there is nothing in common, no conversation, no way of knowing if there is "mental attraction" and there is nothing in common in what people like.


No, there is no reason to meet them with no pic on top of all that.
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 11/7/2015
Msg: 2661
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 11/30/2015 6:38:59 PM

Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?


Yes. It turned out to be a group of giggling teenagers.
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 2662
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 11/30/2015 6:52:18 PM
Well. Come on. We need the rest of the story. Did you get lucky?
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 11/7/2015
Msg: 2663
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 11/30/2015 7:16:46 PM
^ PM me with your credit card info and I'll give you all the details ;)
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 2664
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 11/30/2015 7:19:45 PM
I'm pretty sure you still have all that info. I've been meaning to ask you, I haven't been able to use it since I gave you that info. And I'm still waiting on those gold bars.
 Sweetness_and_Light
Joined: 11/10/2015
Msg: 2665
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/20/2015 8:21:21 AM
Funny I never saw this topic before....

None of my dates have seen what I look like beforehand and I dated 3 that had no pictures and I never asked. I would much rather date men without pictures.

I am still unhappily single, though after reading some of the threads on here, I am happily single.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 2666
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/20/2015 7:03:19 PM

None of my dates have seen what I look like beforehand and I dated 3 that had no pictures and I never asked. I would much rather date men without pictures.

WOW. You're joking though, right? :) Not just willing, but Much Rather date men *without* pictures?? :) IMO, that's ammo for having someone not have so many dating successes. But I guess I could see the side of it where if you meet without pictures, it gives it more of a sense that you're meeting someone NEW when you meet them... it may come off as less of an "internet date" in one's mind, and more like meeting someone at the bar/restaurant where ya meet? Assuming of course they don't talk ad nauseam leading up to it (that could end up being an incredible waste of time if ya meet and they're not attractive).
 LuvFishes
Joined: 7/1/2011
Msg: 2667
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/21/2015 10:07:53 PM
[ ] Been brave enough to meet someone with no pic [/]
Actually my profile started for the first three yrs without any pics, very tech challenged. Even now messing with web cam is not easy for me LOL. My profile was pretty detailed back then in describing me... it was a lot of fun, the guys took a gamble and were pleasantly surprised. Some of the best dates too. I despise texting and carrying a phone period.

There is a guy on here that feeds women the line about their job and security... he's all about FWB dating... but as he ages he's loosing up. Have I dated him no but I did call him out on it. We became friendly chat and challenged one another intelligently. He's good looking, has money but prefers no ties, no emotional attachments and uses security concerns as reason. Just moved from the OBX to neighboring town where I work. LOL I challenged his security scenario... he said I was the first to question it... and I said I told you my email was one of curiosity not seeking a date, sex, nothing but observation. Longest date for me started on Friday and ended on Monday AM rofl. Too much fun.
 Sweetness_and_Light
Joined: 11/10/2015
Msg: 2668
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/22/2015 4:05:51 AM
"that could end up being an incredible waste of time if ya meet and they're not attractive"

Ah NG, I think that is why OLD is not working for me. All the men seem to want is a picture whereas all I want is to meet someone and get to know them better, I am incredibly shallow as far as looks go and all of the men I have dated I would have never agreed to a date had I known what they really looked like in person.

Yep, men are all about looks and I won't discount the fact that I probably have a crappy personality (to them) to boot.

I am not even trying anymore, really. I don't look through the profiles because there is no one I am attracted to and the ones I feel a bit of a draw to I won't message if they are obviously in a higher income bracket than I (because of where they live) as I am dirt poor.

More an exercise in living in a state of perpetual hope/disappointment. But it's Christmas, they'll be plenty of time for my complaints after the holidays are done.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 2669
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/22/2015 10:19:39 AM

(that could end up being an incredible waste of time if ya meet and they're not attractive).


Is it any less of a waste of time when people show up not looking like their old or fake pics that they posted on the site for people to rely on to decide if they are interested in meeting them?
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 2670
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/22/2015 2:47:02 PM
Looks isn't the only thing, but it is the most important sole thing (although you could break looks up into categories where other things outside looks are definitely greater than). It's just Super Fast to determine when looking at most, so that, along with guilt-biased ingrained in us, to assume it "doesn't mean much", because so little determination is used. You don't need to go out on 3 dates to have a decent determination... just 3 seconds of looking at them in person. :)

Is it any less of a waste of time when people show up not looking like their old or fake pics that they posted on the site for people to rely on to decide if they are interested in meeting them?

There is that, but it's not common they're going to go from an 8/10 to a 4/10 if one has multiple photos not taken from MySpace angles or decorations from the 80s in the background. :) The large variances will happen, sure... and even only a notch or so lower which is common -- at least it is within the realm of the person you were engaging with. Either way, it's important NOT to become pen pals with those one meets. You want to meet them as soon as possible after some nice chit-chat. Begin to actually get to know them in person, not via Yahoo IM. Otherwise, you increase your chances of Sally or Bob being 50lbs heavier and 10 years older looking. :)

All the men seem to want is a picture whereas all I want is to meet someone and get to know them better

Why waste your time with someone who you don't even know if you're physically attracted? "All" (ie a vast vast majority) women also want the same thing -- a picture. Looks is an essential part of human sexuality (non-platonic desire), just as gender preference is. It's a basic normal thing.

I am incredibly shallow as far as looks go and all of the men I have dated I would have never agreed to a date had I known what they really looked like in person.

If "men are all about looks", then you admittedly fall in the same basket. You're doing a form of preventative correction to NOT see what they look like -- so you have some emotional attachment to avoid what you believe is too-picky of a judgement call which may make you miss out on good guys at heart. That can work for someone meeting a 6.5 but one's normal attraction line is drawn at, say, a 7... but that time/emotion invested and positive view of them to meet them gives them a chance, and you end up happy for it. I understand. That is a positive side-effect to that game-plan, but it comes at a great cost. :)

I am not even trying anymore, really. I don't look through the profiles because there is no one I am attracted to

You can't criticize guys for being all-about-looks Too Much. Again, it's a human thing, not a gender thing. But yes, some people (admittedly yourself) are too wrapped up in it. The problem with playing the no-pictures+pen-pal Game (it is a game) is that it's a waste of time, despite helping a part of things with someone like you who's way too judgmental about looks. Due to this...

I won't discount the fact that I probably have a crappy personality (to them) to boot.

... it's your (bad) life experiences dealing with dating, men, etc that has helped form that. Until you wash yourself of that to a decent degree, it will haunt your dating "luck". Not wanting a guy even a higher income bracket than "dirt poor" isn't a good strategy easy. I can understand not seemingly semi-wealthy or higher to avoid rejection. But I think you're throwing way too much of a baby out with the bathwater. In a nutshell, you have to "unlearn what you have learned" as far as experiences and such go from the dating world (translated to 'men'). Usually requires a change of doing things / approaching things, and reading up on stuff and subjecting yourself over some time to things that'll change the taste in the air (while on a Break from even thinking about dating). The POF forums don't help, I'm sure. :)
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 2671
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/22/2015 3:31:00 PM
I agree, looks are what are important initially. Repeat after me. Let us not pretend that it is shallow to want a desirable, to us, person as we are looking to have a sexual and romantic connection, right?? It is sheer folly to meet anyone that we have no visual idea of. Men are visual creatures but so are women. Relationships are not conducted purely from the intellect or what we may have in common etc.

What a waste of time these blind dates would be. How needy or brave, I don't know which, would a person have to be to take such a chance?? It is difficult enough to connect and have chemistry with those who we have some idea of how they look, but no pics at all??

Clearly that strategy is not working so take a different tack, have the courage to load your images, insist on the other guy doing the same, and see how you go.
 TrvstInKarma
Joined: 9/1/2015
Msg: 2672
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/22/2015 11:07:59 PM
I don't even respond to messages without pictures.
 Lasthookbringsme
Joined: 11/8/2015
Msg: 2673
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/23/2015 6:06:04 AM
I'd rather an old photo of their former self than none at all. (Though the no pics profile might be interesting and fascinating, they aren't worth the risk).
 Sweetness_and_Light
Joined: 11/10/2015
Msg: 2674
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/23/2015 7:19:09 AM
In answer to Letitia above:


Clearly that strategy is not working so take a different tack, have the courage to load your images, insist on the other guy doing the same, and see how you go.


Just can't seem to do it, I don't know why. I am so desperately broken inside (there's another thread where I am talking about the 'attraction' issue again and I wish I could turn it off) and I don't know how to relieve it. The only comfort I seem to have lately is posting on this board as it gives me a semblance of belonging while I try to live with all of my ugly feelings.

I have a completely generic profile as a result, I hesitate to match my old profile with my pictures because when NOBODY contacts me, that will be crushing. I have had a lot of profile views lately, some from old forumites who don't post here any more. Some from guys way outside my area and those that I can I send little notes to. Something to pass the time while I am waiting for life to be over.

The deep down reason I don't try harder is because I know I should not be here. How does one ever get well enough to look for a mate, someone with whom to share life so it is not so gosh darned lonely?
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 2675
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/31/2015 4:57:32 PM
rashien

Hope it all works out okay and she actually shows. Text her just before your appointed meeting time or better yet call her and hear her voice before taking the time to get dressed and go out.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 2676
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/31/2015 5:00:14 PM
sweetness and light

life is a gamble and it takes courage to put yourself out there but what is the alternative?? to be lonely all your life? but first I think you need some serious counselling by the sound of it.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  >