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 MizQ
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 84
Justice for the good Fathers!!!Page 5 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
like MsQ have no idea of the sleezyness of the system or she is part of it.


Excuse me, what system are you speaking of? The system in the US, Canada, where?

A part of it? I beg to differ.

I do not care to go into specifics of my divorce agreement here, but let me say that it was a 50/50 divorce down to the household furnishings and the debt for that matter.

Sleeziness in my case simply did NOT exist.

Does unfairness in our court sytems exist, sure. But, YOU have to play a proactive role in protecting yourself. Does anyone really fele in a divorce that they came out ahead. Not usually....

Sitting around blaming a system for all your downfalls is not going to get you very far in life and you are going to end up a bitter man wondering where life has gone. Bitterness gets a person nowwhere.
 Smiley12345
Joined: 5/28/2008
Msg: 85
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/7/2008 7:07:59 PM
It is the system's fault and not the women. The system lets a woman abort a child and the father can't do a thing about it. A woman can have police remove man from his home keep children away except 2\14 days. This is the system. It is the system's fault. In 1960, women stayed home and played mommy. Not many of them do that now and this is why society is crumbling. Nobody is sitting around and moping. If everybody recognises the problem than maybe we can rectify it for future generation. Nobody is bitter. I see my children twice a week and every second weekend. Have never missed a child support payment. Am very active with my children. Cost me more money than I could afford but you only live once. MsQ is lucky people in 1919 didn't listen to "You can't change the system", or she would'nt have the right to vote today.
 MizQ
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 86
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/7/2008 7:18:11 PM
^^Most were happy to go with the status quo. It took a few strong women (and men) to stand up and fight injustice.

I don't wear rose colored glasses. I am aware that divorce as a institution is flawed. Do you think I enjoy having my child leave every other weekend, to go share a life with my ex and his new family. Not most days, but it is what it is. I live in a no fault state. Divorces are granted for no reason. We don't have a choice in many circumstances that are handed to us in life. What we make of it is the true test.

Glad to hear you are not bitter, as your posts sure led me in that direction of thinking. Enjoy your kids.

* Bottom line, custody shared 50/50 won't make it any more fair, in most instances.
 sara36274
Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 87
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:20:31 AM
My lawyer told me that the courts in my area are biased towards the mother, and that because I moved out and left the kids there, the courts view that as me admitting that she is capable of taking care of them by herself. Since I admitted that, I had almost no chance of convincing a judge that they would be better off with me, and since all things being equal the mother tends to get custody.


Wow...... you moved out and left the kids there.... In the state that I live in (Alabama) this is considered abandonment.... Does not matter which parent left... A lot of fathers are getting custody of their children... more so along the lines of they would be able to give them a more stable environment.. be able to provide them with the things that they need....


She refuses to get more than a part time job, but complains that she can't afford the mortgage. I gave her the choice of keeping the house or not. She wanted it. I also gave her the choice of vehicles, the older Caravan that is paid off or the Explorer that we owed one. She chose the Explorer. Now she complains that she can't afford them all and wants me to make some of the Explorer payments. I suggested that she use her rear end for a garage on that one.

The courts tend to be horribly biased against men.


I have a guy friend that went through the same thing as what you describe.... She wanted it all but wanted him to pay for it.... He ended up filing chapter 8 so neither had anything.. this is not the way to go.. and women like that are the ones that give good women a bad name.

In my divorce i got everything that i came into the marriage with..... which was everything. he tried to take the house that he never made a payment on even tried to take my car... he took my truck and sold it out from under me and still wanted more.. so its not just a woman thing,,,, SOME men are like that too.

Also she may not want to get a full time job in fear of getting less child support. which is just dumb. In the state that i live in even if you don't have a job they will base you CS off of minimum wage. mother or the father. in my case we both had good jobs but he changed jobs so much that it kind of made things harder.... but the judge said that if he quit then he would have to find another job paying the same amount or more b/c he knew that he was capable of making that kind of money. And that his CS would not change. All state laws are different though. that is just in Alabama and just from my experience.

But all states are different just like all people are different. Nobody is the same and no situation is the same..... the only thing that i can say is fight for your rights. build up your case if you feel that you have one.
 WindRoper
Joined: 7/24/2007
Msg: 88
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:36:32 AM

"Wot if my wife refused to sign the forms"... I was told that I WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO HAVE THE OPERATION!!!!!!! Now tell me its not a womens world...because IT IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah... the same thing sorta happened to me. My now-ex renegged on a promise to have a vasectomy after the birth of our daughter. Then it took me a year to convince him to sign consent papers for my tubaligation. By then I was pregnant again. Or
try being a woman with a medical need for a hysterectomy and the doc won't perform the procedure unless your husband agrees. Remember -- I already couldn't have more children. So apparently how the surgery MIGHT impact HIS sex life was a greater concern to the doctor than MY quality of life. It was a greater concern for the husband too, after listening to some other men's horror stories, until I convinced him worse things could happen. So the whole "women's world" thing just doesn't ring true in my experiences.
Not that I don't recognize there is corruption and sleaziness within the judical system and it ain't limited to divorce/family court. I was just thinking this morning how often the victorious side in court seems to be the one who lines up the most convincing liars. And, yes, some judges have preconceived notions about children being best served by remaining with their mothers. OTOH, I have run into judges who are prejudiced toward fathers simply cuz they are bound and determined to right such injustice by setting precedents favorable to fathers. That's not justice. That's just a knee-jerk reaction that would sling society in general to the other end of the spectrum.
There are no quick fixes or standards that will work in every given situation. Each case must be tried on its merits. And that takes some things that no one seems to want to give -- time and the thought that they may not walk away with everything they had the day before.
 pokerandpucks
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 89
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/13/2008 8:39:53 PM

Wow...... you moved out and left the kids there.... In the state that I live in (Alabama) this is considered abandonment.... Does not matter which parent left... A lot of fathers are getting custody of their children... more so along the lines of they would be able to give them a more stable environment.. be able to provide them with the things that they need....


I moved 15 minutes away. I didn't figure that living in the house while we were getting divorced was a very good situation for the kids to be in. If she had moved out, it would have been 2 1/2 hours away to her mother's house, and she would have taken the kids. I would have had no legal way to stop her from that, and it would have meant that if I didn't get custody, I wouldn't get to see them nearly as much as I do now.
 Lily0923
Joined: 5/28/2008
Msg: 90
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Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/13/2008 10:23:33 PM
Well single daddy, let me address this for you point by point.

First off, you oughta know who you're popping babies out with a little better than that, if they screw you over, you have to ask yourself how well did you know that person? Did you have children too soon with that person... That is the fault of BOTH parties.

Secondly, I don't know ANY woman who has taken a year off for maternity leave. And by the way, lets see you pop out a kid and see how quickly you go back to work.... There is so much that goes on in a woman's body when she is pregnant, then after giving birth, her body is ALL out of whack.

Now as for visitation, that is for the court to decide if the TWO parties are not adult enough to find a suitable visitation schedule...again this goes back to the "how well did you know this person you brought a baby into the world with"

Now as for child support, I'm not sure if you can even conceive of the amount of money a custodial parent spends, but I will guarentee this, whatever the court assigns still doesn't cover the bills.

If you have weekend visitation, and do not take them on that weekend, well... let's look at it this way, there are 48 hours in a weekend, there are 120 hours in the 5 day week. So if "daddy" decides not to take the child for the 48 hours the mother then has the child for 168 hours a week, have you spent 168 hours non stop with a baby? So for those 48 hours you decided to do "something" for yourself... Mommy can barely get an uninterupted shower for 20 minutes.

I love when the non-custodial parent, is angry about "their" situation....

Give me a break huh?
 pokerandpucks
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 91
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/13/2008 10:43:51 PM
My ex ****es about that stuff all the time. Every time she does I ask her if she wants to trade, I'd love to be the custodial parent and take them to the dr. and everything else. It usually shuts her up pretty quick because she knows I mean it.
 WindRoper
Joined: 7/24/2007
Msg: 92
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/14/2008 6:29:09 AM

My ex ****es about that stuff all the time. Every time she does I ask her if she wants to trade, I'd love to be the custodial parent and take them to the dr. and everything else. It usually shuts her up pretty quick because she knows I mean it.

Hey! Something similar happened to a gf of mine. She told the father he could have custody and she would pay child support. Pretty ballsy move, but I guess she knew him well enough to know he already didn't carry his share of the load in parenting and providing for their daughter so he dang sure didn't want full responsibility. He declined her offer and she waived child support.
Not that I'm saying all guys are like that. I'm sure some men would be happy with such an arrangement and do well at it. But that doesn't change the fact that being a parent who shoulders much or all the responsibilities/tasks can be an exercise in frustration at times. What's so wrong with acknowledging and verbalizing that?
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 93
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 6/29/2017 6:50:49 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RllnCmROPL0
disgusting radical feminist hate and lies
 IBup4it
Joined: 6/15/2017
Msg: 94
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 6/30/2017 12:16:00 PM
There's justice for good fathers but it takes time and a lot of hard work to get it.
 forumslady
Joined: 12/7/2016
Msg: 95
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 6/30/2017 8:30:27 PM
I can't remember if I've posted on this thread or not, if not, now I am............

Every situation is different.

Sometimes the mother is the better parent, some times, the father.

Younger children don't get much say (unfortunately, they can't and sometimes that is too bad.), but a child over 12, their preference weighs heavily, in a courts decision, a lot of the time.

All I know is that , as a parent, if you are not putting your children first, the courts can tell and it WILL matter.

When I divorced, my attorney told me 3 things I should NOT do...........

1) Get into another relationship, before the divorce was final.
2) Leave my children in the care of my (soon to be) ex and live in another residence, away from my children.
3) Deny my ex access to our children, prior to court.

I am the type of person I would have not done ANY of these things anyway, but my attorney's advice was not lost on me. I did NONE of these things.

The ability to create a child is not all that hard. (No pun intended) Being a good parent is a CHOICE.

It might seem like you (The generic you) should be able to do whatever you want, during divorce proceedings.

If you do that and don't make wise choices and the other person gets custody, forgive me if I don't have much sympathy.

Sometimes people want to point blame at the ex, when they should be looking in a mirror.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 96
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/1/2017 6:24:19 AM
Typer, I know you are a mother of three children and won't go deeply into this particular subject matter, but I do hear a lot about, good father's being unable to have access to their children and some women using children as pawns to get money....I come from a two parent family and hate to see so many broken families in society...so many kids having abandonment issues, so many kids without positive male role models growing up, so many kids having depression, so many growing up and committing crimes, becoming addicted to alcohol and drugs, so many commiting suicide and some many being unhappy in general.

I know that some mothers are great mothers and some fathers are great fathers, but one parent families are not healthy for a kid growing up, whatever way someone tries to spin it....As great as you might be as a mother, you can't play the role of both parents and teach your kids the male view on life, you can only teach them female views and opinions...much the same as a man bringing up his kids

I do think women are more in touch with their feelings and much easier to talk to, because they share a lot more than a lot of men and it's more natural for a mother to want to take care of her kids and spend time with them, but some mothers are not cut out to look after children and some fathers are

It's the courts that work in favour of women, regardless of circumstances and I think they are doing the child an injustice

The kids welfare should always be the number one priority, regardless of which gender gets to have custody and the kids will really suffer, if the wrong parent gets those kids.

I think people need to work much harder on relationships and make them work, for the sake of the kids they brought into this world and stop this trend in society of one parent families.
 Pansitas
Joined: 6/23/2012
Msg: 97
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Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/11/2017 10:07:17 PM
Agreed. Its not fair. Justice for good fathers.
 U21984
Joined: 2/17/2017
Msg: 98
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 7/16/2017 1:51:16 PM
MRE's (Men's Rights Activists) DO have a point. Fo Sho.

And I am NO fan of feminists. Can sniff them out at 50 paces.

But, MRE's don't really know how to get chicks. Just have a story about how they dun dem wrong.

Not Cool, Sorry!

This place is NOTHING but losers – not counting me and a few other guys, of course!
They have the WORST advice. hahahah
It is an assemblage of the HUGEST LOSERS in all the Internet.
Everyone knows it- Google =POF FORUMS= People have known about this place for 10 years and running! LOL
 bacheloretteNumberone
Joined: 3/24/2017
Msg: 99
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 8/12/2017 6:47:29 PM
You find the environment like this because it didn't used to be like this.
Back, way back in the day a woman had zero rights. If her husband wanted to take her children, he could. That was back in the 1800's.
What you see now is the efforts of a judicial system intent on the welfare of the child. They don't care about you and they kinda dont care about the mom. They care about the child. In fact if you and your pregnant lady were of a kind a crap perents, they'll take the kid away from both of you.....

But, back to the issue, children need money to be raised. Typically the man has a larger earning potential, typically the woman is a more nurturing caregiver. Clearly, this is not always the case. But typically.
Like what do you want - you wanna bath the kid, change the diapers, make them their meals, read them books, play with legos, take them to school, talk to the teachers, arrange playdates, consider their personalities to near obsession so you know how to guide them? Dude, come on, you don't want this. I mean buddy, no matter whether you are with the kid or not, children need money to be raised. Welcome to adulthood!! Makes you wanna think about where you're sticking your wanker next time, maybe?

What I wonder is why you got a girl pregnant who was of a nature to leave you. And why'd she leave? Are you an ass? Mostly, women who are pregnant do not want to be without the father of the baby. So you either got some trailer trash knocked up or you're the issue with her leaving. Have a nice life with all this going on - you haven't even started yet.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 100
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Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 8/13/2017 2:24:43 AM
Thread is from late 2006. The kid in question is about 12 years old now. An unlikely update is long overdue...
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 101
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Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 8/14/2017 8:34:07 PM
Guys that have the cash and don't want to support their kids should be denied custody. It's hard to be a mom and have to keep quiet to your kid about what their father is doing to them, meanwhile the dad is pretending to the child that they're doing the right thing, equal to the mother. A mom can't tell her child your dad is behind in payments.

This is a broken system. The courts feel both parents should be involved, doesn't matter if one parent is unfit. Yet, when it comes to adopting, you can be single or be two women or two men. Kids don't need two parents in their lives if one isn't a good example, and really an embarrassment. I have my gf's situation in mind. The ex can't do enough bad to have less custody, but he doesn't have 5o/50, so it has been shown he's not 100% fit.
 Mister0Independent
Joined: 7/2/2017
Msg: 102
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 8/15/2017 2:47:26 PM
^^^ And what about women that have the cash and don't want to support their kids?
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 103
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Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 8/15/2017 3:31:38 PM
Same applies. There are quite a few men that are also doing it all, raising kids on their own, because the mothers flaked out on their responsibilities. Then these non-caring parents want to pop into the kids lives after the other parent did all the heavy lifting.
 Devilsfan58
Joined: 3/19/2009
Msg: 104
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Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 2/9/2018 11:36:14 PM
Having been a divorced father and receiving nothing from the ex I can sympathize with a lot of you. Furthermore I always like how they can determine that a parent must pay x number of dollars but the feds or the state don't match that amount in benefits. Furthermore the Custodial parent is usually able to get free medical, foodstamps and depending on the circumstances other benefits that don't show up on no income statements. And because your a custodial parent you are automatically included.

1, Two rules if you are going to divorce do it before you hit the 10 year marriage rule comes into effect. Otherwise she or he might be receiving 10 thousand a year in social security benefits from you when they decide to go after it.
2. If your going to divorce do it before December 31, 2018 as that is the date the Taxes on Alimony switch from the person receiving it to the person paying it.

Good Luck.
 feirene
Joined: 1/3/2017
Msg: 105
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Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 3/18/2018 9:09:03 AM
both parents actually have 50/50 rights. responsibilities come with those rights though.

women don't need to take responsibility for any man who walks away from their kids. we're already the ones left looking after their kids and you are nothing to do with us any more except for the guy who wanted us to bear your children and so should support us in bringing them up and ensuring their needs are not neglected.

when you walk out on a partner you do not get to control their life. yes they should compromise but basically they've got their own life now and are already having to revolve that around those kids you walked out on and are already compromising there and you need to do the same whether you like it or not. sick of men expecting us to be the burdens for everything, including their responsibilities that they decided they couldn't handle.

it's nothing to do with maternity leave at all. it's to do with emotional burdens have always been dumped on women, dependents have often been dumped on women. this is why you see mostly women working in caring fields and working with dependents because it was/is expected of them.

as for women being unfit mothers i do think the courts take into consideration what is best for the children, primarily this entails who is able to give them the most stability and routine, after that finances are taken into account. so if a man doesn't get custody or 50/50 custody he basically is being told he is an unfit father and this maybe unfair but it's deemed by the court as a fact that he is not able to provide them with what is considered most important.

i have kids with 2 guys. one of my exes is selfish and expects everything his way and for my life (and his kids) to revolve around him despite us not being together, the other ex is considerate of my needs outside of our kids and we have similar values when it comes to raising our kids. guess which ex walked away from his kids when i wouldn't revolve around him and his selfish needs (and the courts agreed he didn't deserve any of the 'rights' he was asking for) and guess which ex has joint custody with me (agreed between ourselves and never needed court intervention).
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 106
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Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 3/18/2018 6:41:22 PM
Devil, you sound like a bit of a scumbag. You want an ex to show she collects foodstamps.....why? If she was deemed the custodial parent, why should she be giving you anything? What difference is it to you if someone's ex-wife ops to collect SS based off the ex's SS? The guy won't get less because of it. You sound like a real creep! My advice to ladies, don't have kids with creeps that resent taking care of their kids.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 107
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History
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 3/18/2018 9:12:23 PM
^^^ Scumbag? Really? I do not find anything wrong with his post.


1, Two rules if you are going to divorce do it before you hit the 10 year marriage rule comes into effect. Otherwise she or he might be receiving 10 thousand a year in social security benefits from you when they decide to go after it.
2. If your going to divorce do it before December 31, 2018 as that is the date the Taxes on Alimony switch from the person receiving it to the person paying it.


A couple of reasons there why you should never get married or have children.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 108
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History
Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 3/18/2018 10:06:12 PM
Why is he trying to screw women over that aren't even his wife by saying to dump them before year 10? That doesn't work when the women are doing the dumping. He has a hard-on against all women. It sounds like he's resentful that his wife got food stamps, like he'd prefer to see the mother of his kids destitute, where he obviously was not a good provider. Think how much he sucked for his wife to choose being a single mother on food stamps. He's a miserable human being.
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