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 reverendswine
Joined: 4/14/2018
Msg: 326
Calling Kids baggagePage 14 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
Damn, nyx. Isn't this your 1980th profile?
 L_LuuLuu
Joined: 8/2/2009
Msg: 327
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/24/2018 7:18:24 AM
I'm actually meeting men over 60 with full time custody of toddlers.

Seems they wanted younger women. And met one who promised not to get pregnant. lol.
Now the young chick's got her separate maintenance and bailed.

Man with spoiled, screaming toddler joining us on all our dates. Man expecting me to "sleep over" and leave early next day so kid won't find out? Now the man, having learned his lesson, is seeking mature woman to raise his "adorable" little tot, while he golfs? No thanks.

While some older women would jump at the chance, that's just not for me. Sorry, but that IS baggage in my aged eyes.
 Braylen99
Joined: 4/19/2018
Msg: 328
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/24/2018 7:45:16 AM
Why bother sleeping with them if he has baggage?

Seems like you should determine if they have baggage before being intimate
 Kelley300698
Joined: 3/21/2018
Msg: 329
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/24/2018 8:49:28 AM
Of course kids are baggage in the respect of forming relationships. That is why single mothers are far less desirable to marry and have fewer options than single women. However, that is not the same as saying children are unwanted or undesirable.
 Tech30
Joined: 8/11/2017
Msg: 330
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/25/2018 8:35:25 AM
More single mother talk? Single guys dont want to date moms. THere are a ton of great reasons not to. Dont hate on single guys for that.
Your kids are little angels.....to you. Its baggage if they arent ours. Getting with you literally comes with more obstacles. '

Single men.... Dont do it.
 Kelley300698
Joined: 3/21/2018
Msg: 331
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/25/2018 8:55:14 AM

Single guys dont want to date moms. There are a ton of great reasons not to.

I believe it greatly depends on the guy's options. If he is mid to late 30's, most of his choices are single women 30 or above and most of them probably already have children. If he is in his 20's, most of the girls he can date don't have children. However, most young men cannot compete for pretty single girls because they are not good enough looking, but he might find a single mom that is pretty. A guy might choose a pretty single mom over a less attractive single girl.

In any event, young single moms have to accept guys that are less desirable than guys they could have had if they didn't have children. That is, guys that or older or not as good looking.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 332
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/25/2018 8:58:07 AM
"Damn, nyx. Isn't this your 1980th profile?"

>>>ah well, she looks good enough we click on it and recognize her, so I guess what's she's doing....works :)

"I'm actually meeting old goats who got randy with young chix who now have their child support and daycare rolled into one"

>>>sounds like poetic justice to me :) So many sexually active people who think they're pulling the wool over someone else's eyes ("I don't need to use a condom? sucka! I mean, awesome honey!") and then find out they got screwed. As the saying goes, the easiest person to con is the confidence man.

anyhoo, its not polite to label those happy little accidents "baggage", but the truth is...depending upon what you want from a relationship, kids can either get in the way or be a great excuse why you show up after bedtime and then have to leave at midnight.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 333
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/26/2018 8:51:11 AM
This a very old post, but it comes up occasionally. Some don't understand what baggage is..........and it's not kids. Baggage refers to emotional baggage from trauma in life. It's a mental thing, and has nothing to do with children, lol

By the way, children are more little people to love you!
 RoxyMoronic
Joined: 6/7/2016
Msg: 334
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/27/2018 2:45:14 AM
I thought baggage could refer to anything you’re bringing from the past into a new relationship.
Kids kinda qualify but it’s incredibly cold and crude to refer to them as such.

LuLu, I have in the past encountered guys my age with smaller children, usually they’ve much older children and then ‘the young un’. Not many. I’m not inclined to pursue a relationship with someone in this position.
Maybe 10 yrs ago but not at my age now. It’s nothing to do with ‘baggage’, shit I’ve got plenty of my own but more to do with the reasoning behind why a guy would think 45 is a great age to have another.
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 335
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/27/2018 5:18:49 AM
I don't even refer to children as kids let alone baggage. I have just never cared for the term. /shrug/

As far as the older men with children issue - I have commented about this a number of times over the years in these lovely forums.

Perhaps it is my area? Lots of older and more likely than not wealthy men. Who knows? What I do know is that I need way more than two hands to count the number of men my age and older (some much older) who have very young children as a result of second or third or more marriages. I have also found that more of them than I would think either have full custody or 50/50. Clearly some of these men are definitely interested in meeting a woman who can step in as a caregiver for the child(ren) and for them in what could be the very near future. Some of them will outright say as much or their line of questioning on dates makes it crystal clear.

Some of the men that I know in this situation are frequent customers where I work. Co-workers will comment about how sweet it is that these men spend so much time with their grandchildren. I just inwardly chuckle.
 Braylen99
Joined: 4/19/2018
Msg: 336
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/27/2018 6:20:43 AM
A woman who doesnt have custody of her kids is a bad mother

Those men have bad pickers
 prettybrwneyedone
Joined: 6/1/2017
Msg: 337
Brainless/Troll
Posted: 4/27/2018 5:30:27 PM

A woman who doesnt have custody of her kids is a bad mother


Spoken like the true assumptive idiot that you are.

It's funny that you can sum up every single situation by your assumption. Buy a clue, dumb ass.
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 338
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Brainless/Troll
Posted: 4/27/2018 5:45:39 PM
Braylen99 = Steve. (Sometimes known as ClooneysTutor.)
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 339
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Brainless/Troll
Posted: 4/28/2018 2:07:30 AM

Braylen99 = Steve. (Sometimes known as ClooneysTutor.)

Really? Steve was always nice to me. /shrug/ He definitely seems to have changed after or during his last relationship. There was a time when he gave good advice.

For anyone who is interested look up Braylen on the Urban Dictionary.

There are a number of reincarnations floating around. Many of them give themselves away with spelling and grammar errors. We should get that guy who is training to be a medium or whatever to give us some insight!!!!
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 340
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Brainless/Troll
Posted: 4/28/2018 8:17:27 AM

We should get that guy who is training to be a medium or whatever to give us some insight!!!!


- Did someone call me, the super-seer?! I actually did work as a psychic once. What what you like to know?!
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 341
baggage is anything you can get a handle on
Posted: 4/28/2018 9:31:02 AM
"A woman who doesnt have custody of her kids is a bad mother. Those men have bad pickers."

>>there's a little blue pill that can help their pad bickers. assuming they like bad girls or anyone who's a bad mother fkr.

"I actually did work as a psychic once, what do you want to know?"

>>>uhhhhh....wouldn't a psychic already know? :)
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 342
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Brainless/Troll
Posted: 4/28/2018 11:44:36 AM
Spot
There are a number of reincarnations floating around. Many of them give themselves away with spelling and grammar errors.

Exactly. It's like they're trying to sneak into the room and then they set off an airhorn.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 343
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/28/2018 11:46:47 AM

I thought baggage could refer to anything you’re bringing from the past into a new relationship.

Psychological baggage certainly can be -- stuff that still affects them or they aren't over. Then there's just situational baggage -- stuff that gets in the way of the kind of dating you'd be aiming for. If she has two 17 year olds, that's not really baggage if I want to just casually date her. If it's going for an LTR -- it's usually just a little baggage, sometimes a lot. You have to be dating to figure it out.

I don't even refer to children as kids let alone baggage. I have just never cared for the term. /shrug/

I guess if you don't care for them, then they're baggage if said kids are still living with them. :)

Clearly some of these men are definitely interested in meeting a woman who can step in as a caregiver for the child(ren) and for them in what could be the very near future.

That's some baggage right there ("I hate lugging these around all the time. Care to give a helping hand?").
 47Seagulls
Joined: 3/16/2018
Msg: 344
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/28/2018 2:16:58 PM

I believe it greatly depends on the guy's options. If he is mid to late 30's, most of his choices are single women 30 or above and most of them probably already have children. If he is in his 20's, most of the girls he can date don't have children. However, most young men cannot compete for pretty single girls because they are not good enough looking, but he might find a single mom that is pretty. A guy might choose a pretty single mom over a less attractive single girl.

In any event, young single moms have to accept guys that are less desirable than guys they could have had if they didn't have children. That is, guys that or older or not as good looking.


Where do you get this stuff from - Teen Beat?

Pretty soon the discussion will be "dating out of your league" or something of that nature.


Psychological baggage certainly can be -- stuff that still affects them or they aren't over.


The above is true, for any age or gender or with/without children or divorced/single/separated/widowed.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 345
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 4/28/2018 3:26:30 PM

The above is true, for any age or gender or with/without children or divorced/single/separated/widowed.

Yeah, it doesn't require any key common elements present to have psychological baggage. But, recently divorced/broken-up should assumably bring some of it, and still juggling kids in the house will at least bring situational baggage (although not necessarily of the negative variety).
 L_LuuLuu
Joined: 8/2/2009
Msg: 346
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 5/1/2018 2:58:59 PM
Maybe it's not the kids THEMSELVES who are the baggage.

Lot's of Baby-Mama (or Daddy) Drama as the parents' loud arguments and outlandish one-ups-manships destroy the peace in your home. Maybe the Ex hates YOU and does their best to make sure the kids do, as well.

Maybe its all the drama that parents allow to surround the little ones. Occasionally parents vie for the child's favor. Granting the child his every whim. No attempts to discipline at all. Result is spoiled, rude, selfish, and maybe destructive kids. The LITTLE Monsters grow up to be BIG ones. Jail bail, rehab, attorneys fees, and supporting the criminal your spouse has created really adds up. Then comes the grandbaby the grown up brats discarded on YOUR doorstep. That one's going to be a troubled child, too.

Or maybe its just the parent to expects to party while YOU raise the child on your own.

Or maybe you have worked all your life, raised your own kids to be self-reliant, and hoped for some romantic adult free time to play.

Possible any of this is just NOT the future of your dreams? Or not even what you signed on for?
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 347
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Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 5/1/2018 4:34:38 PM
I consider anyone whether adult or child, who works their butt off to cause drama to be potential baggage.

Therefore, they do not get to share my life.

Child free zone is my happy place. No point in telling potential dates anything different.
 Robertatherese
Joined: 4/5/2018
Msg: 348
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 5/5/2018 2:38:41 AM
The 'baggage' refers to the part where penis met vagina and created an ongoing relationship you are stuck with now for the rest of your life called parenting, which is the consequence of having sex. It is 'baggage' because so many people are still attached to their exes, despite their 'just friends' bullshit claim. That is why I don't stay friends with ANY ex bf's.
 Robertatherese
Joined: 4/5/2018
Msg: 349
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 5/5/2018 2:39:49 AM
Having sex was an accident? It didn't happen by holding hands or sitting on a couch!!! Sperm doesn't leap across the room. Grow up, people. God.
 Robertatherese
Joined: 4/5/2018
Msg: 350
Calling Kids baggage
Posted: 5/5/2018 2:42:41 AM
having children because you want someone to love you is NOT a reason to be a parent, and it is not responsible behavior. Love comes from WITHIN. Sounds like so many of you don't love yourselves, and that causes chaos
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