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 forever_laughter
Joined: 9/19/2004
Msg: 71
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight GentlemenPage 2 of 34    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34)
So you can be nice in person but can't be nice in forums? What's up with that Rocky?
Lighten up. You can voice your opinions without attacting people. You never know who might be interested in you and then checks your posts and sees how you communicate with people. Think about it.
 the_world_in_my_pocket
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 72
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/18/2005 11:47:56 PM
Hey Rocky.
I know you asked for females to answer, and no I don't fit the profile, but I do fit the profile of growing up fairly outcasted, quite a bit due to weighing 315 pounds by 9th grade, and I also know that when a person is psychologically beat down because of something they cannot control they have a very hard time maintaining a realistic level of self-confidence. As long as you have low self confidence, women are going to walk right through you. Because you see yourself as an inferior being, to the men that look better then you *stereotypically*, you believe you have no chance. And if you don't look at women as though you have any chance, and you are constantly hiding yourself from the idea and opportunity to jump at one, then how on Earth is one supposed to know when you have interest? Take it from experience, the less like something they have to 'teach' to have self confidence you are, the more likely they are to respond to you. I mean heck, most women in this world are looking for the exact same thing you are. Somebody to relate to, and dump a gang load of problems on. Only to give the assistance it takes to work their problems out, and say "I love you" the next morning. Good luck.
 r1terrell6233
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 73
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/19/2005 12:00:20 AM
People give all types of bullsh!t excuses like "looks don't matter, it's what's on the inside that counts" In reality people are shallow a55holes and are afraid to admit it. If I were you I wouldn't dwell on this issue to much, you will find a true love, and when you do, none of this will matter.
 r1terrell6233
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 77
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/19/2005 12:24:47 AM
I know rocks. They don't because of their shallowness, it's the same way with guys. If a girl is very attractive, she is more likely to seek others like herself and close her mind from everything else. That may be a good thing sometimes as it weeds out the shallow people. However, there are some that are exceptions to this rule, albeit they are rare and hard to find.
 Passinthru
Joined: 2/3/2005
Msg: 81
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/19/2005 8:57:14 AM
Mommy I have confidence in my self. I'm an old fashioned gentleman.
!-Gives gifts on the first date
2-Hold doors open for women
3-Likes to pay for the first date out
4-Likes to get to know the person first on a few dates before having sex
5-Loves to communicate and listen to the other person
6-Enjoys cooking for someone I like
7-ect


All those are great actions Rocky, although by themselves would make you seem a bit of a pushover. Work on your self confidence a bit, it will be attractive than any gesture. After reading through the thread I find myself wondering if you do those things because you think a woman will be drawn to you by them, or if they just come naturally for you. Weigh your motives when seeking a mate, they certainly will and will spot insincerity much sooner than you think.

Mommy (that sounds so freudian) is right, dig a little deeper....
 cooldude
Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 84
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/19/2005 5:02:57 PM
I think genetic's play a big part in it. I am the opposite. I have been thin all my life. Until my metabolism finally slowed down. I weight 150lbs at 5' 10" A lot of people think I am still too skinny but I'm still normal weight/ hight range. I learned to be happy about myself. No matter who does not like me because of my looks. Even though I'm not over weight, not a lot of girls knocking at my doors eather. Well actually recently one might of. I belive there is some truth what r1terrell23 says. Even if by a subconsous level. Good looking ones tend to go for, well the good looking ones. Of course not every time.
 BingoMingle
Joined: 3/25/2005
Msg: 94
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 5/10/2005 5:34:38 AM
Flucking Flat guy's is Fline, Untill her Fliens Flind out. and then De Flat Guy will have to be Flucking all of them tooo.
 Hidden^Secrets
Joined: 9/8/2005
Msg: 95
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 10/5/2005 9:30:01 PM
I must be one of the few, because my friends often laugh at me for my taste in guys!

Personally, I like bigger guys...just more of him to love! Even when I was smaller (like 130lbs) I liked bigger guys...

Big (built or not) arms and a beer gut are attractive to me (along with eyes and ass..lol).

If girls care too much about the outside, then it's their loss...If you're really as great as you say you are, and girls can't see past the outside, their problem!

And whatever happened to a person's personality making them more physically attractive?
 SICutie
Joined: 6/8/2005
Msg: 97
It's the personality that attracts.... or detracts!
Posted: 10/6/2005 7:38:20 AM
nice guy does not mean pushover. it means nice guy!

however the OP probably needs to stop trying to play in the majors til he gets his weight problem under control. just being honest.

for me personally, i wouldn't want an extremely overweight guy. why would i?
 Lynlin1957
Joined: 2/21/2006
Msg: 111
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 3/19/2006 4:50:51 PM
Possibly for the same reasons men don't look past the short, round. pushing 50 aspect of a woman. There are many shallow people in this world, but, there are also just as many people who can look past the physical to the true person underneath. I was married for 22 years to a man who was 5'6" and when we met weighed 120lbs soaking wet. He had made it up to 140 when we lost him. I always out-weighed him. But he didn't care, he was all about the personality, not just the person. Don't let those who wish to turn this into a critique of your person, personality and/or of overweight people in general get to you. Pick what works for you and ignore the rest.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 117
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 3/20/2006 3:12:56 PM
Because we do not know any of these men. Some of us are nice, overweight , attractive women. We too are usually ignored since we are not the norm.
 linne
Joined: 11/7/2005
Msg: 123
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 3/21/2006 4:55:40 PM
Fat guys offend all my better sensibilities. And they suck in bed.
 BBdrgn
Joined: 7/15/2005
Msg: 139
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/1/2006 1:57:54 PM

Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen



<<< Example 1....
 Evan Kouragious
Joined: 3/29/2006
Msg: 140
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/1/2006 2:37:51 PM
Cause woman are into looks/physical just as much as guys! I love how they put "nice, caring, etc" yet will never respond to guys that are like that (this happens to a friend...whose probably one of the most genuine guys around).
 Kelleyisnice
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 141
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/1/2006 3:32:26 PM

Hey ladies, I'm a nice guy who is honest and romantic. Why won't women look on the inside of a person.

Because we are attracted to good looking people. It is just as easy (even easier) to look on the inside of a good looking person as it is someone that overweight and not attractive. Therefore, with a good looking person, we get everything you offer plus we also get physical attraction. Why settle for less, when we can have it all?
 BBdrgn
Joined: 7/15/2005
Msg: 142
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/1/2006 3:40:25 PM

Therefore, with a good looking person, we get everything you offer plus we also get physical attraction. Why settle for less, when we can have it all?



I Could'nt agree more....
 designingwoman
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 144
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/1/2006 4:03:01 PM
To the OP,

I saw alot of women on here who said they'd date a heavyset man. Different women have different preferences. While I prefer a thin or muscular man, that should not deter you from finding that special someone. So, don't worry about one woman's preference and generalize it all over to all women.

I recall one woman saying that a heavyset man is her preference so that she can have "more to cuddle".

So keep on you are bound to meet that special someone. Don't stop looking or trying. Giving up would only cause more frustration in the long run. I like the adage, "If you are sad, act."

Cheers

DW
 Robglide
Joined: 11/11/2005
Msg: 157
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/2/2006 11:27:01 AM
It's down to this my brother: lose the weight for you and your mental/physical being, women will come as a collateral effect.

Not for nothin', work out / go for a walk 4 times week minimum, and your life will change for the better, bet me.

I'm following my own advice; if you do fine, otherwise you need to find your own truth.

Best of luck to you!!
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 159
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/2/2006 1:45:23 PM
I have not read through the entire thread, but I would say the topic itself is a generalization ...

...... there are women who will date a nice romantic overweight gentleman. If not, then why do I see so many "overweight" gentlemen with ladies?

You just have to find them and be appealing to them. I'd say it's a lot about preferences. Also, if you have a nice personality ... that is definitely a plus. It's not just one particular thing that attracts us to each other ... it's a combination of many things.

For me it's brain power ... I just happen to find that very appealing. At my age, I think it would be unrealistic to expect a man with the body of a 25 year old ... I sure don't have the body of a 25 year old ... so they'd have to be able to get past that if they want me around.

We all hope that we will find a mate who wants us in our entire self, but I don't think that exists at any age ...so we sort of settle. We consider our wants and our dislikes (making my spread sheet here as I write ... one columm for each ... I like this, I don't like that) ... we weigh it out and bingo! Either we have a winner or we don't.

Sometimes we have a "keeper" and for some stupid reason we don't know it or see it and it gets away. For the most part, I have remained friends with all the men I have dated for any length of time. Maybe that's because I was their friend long before I became their lover and it was easy to take it back to the "friend" level when for whatever reason we decided we no longer wanted to be lovers.

At some point, too, you have to decide how much you're going to let your weight situation dictate whether or not you meet a lady. It occurs to me that you cannot blame your weight problem for everything. If you are feeling negative about yourself, believe me it shows ... no matter how hard you try to cover it up or how deeply you think you've tucked it away.

If you are a kind, considerate, loving person, someone will notice that and they will want to spend time with you. It may not end up being the love of your life, but you will also not necessarily be alone. Spending time with others who just enjoy being with you could be the way someone will set you up with a lady who will appreciate you for who you are.

Sooooooo ..... chin up ... you are a nice guy ... someone who could care less about your weight problem might be just around the corner. I know it's easier said than done, but you simply must learn not to be so insecure about it.

BTW ... I see all kinds of heavier guys in the forums here bragging about their dates and ladies who are just really good friends ... so if they can do it, so can you.
 designingwoman
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 173
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 4/3/2006 4:12:16 PM
Tigerwoods said it very well, indeed. I feel for the heavy people who truly have a gland problem. But I see so many overweight folks these days, far more than I used to ten or twenty years ago.

I have a friend who lost lots of weight, and did a great job of it! I am very proud of her accomplishment.

I would love to see more people do something to fix their weight problem. Even gland problems can be corrected with medication, I would think. It must be awfully uncomfortable carrying all that weight around.
 Phoenix The Wych
Joined: 5/31/2005
Msg: 183
Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 8/4/2006 7:54:47 AM
I posted this responce on another thread but it fits this question so well that I copied and pasted it. *LMAO* Not cheating, just saving typing time. *LOL*


You're right.....there aren't many. Being a "big girl" myself, I know that a lot (not ALL!! but a lot) of those looking for BBW are actually just looking for sex and they perceive that "fat girls" are desperate girls. While this may or may not be true, those encounters rarely make it into the relationship stage.

Yes, we all DO have preferences. It's a fact of life, not only in the dating scene but in every aspect of life. Personally I like bigger men. I like TALL men. But I don't discriminate against men who aren't 6' tall and/or built like a brick shithouse as the saying goes. *LOL* I don't get upset when a man's (and I'm sure women do the same!) profile says they're only looking for a slender or athletically built woman. It is, after all, their preference and should be respected as such. I would never try to push myself on someone who just cannot be attracted to me because of my size. But I am who and what I am.....take me or leave me.....it's your choice. *S*
 Myrna43
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 185
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 10/3/2006 10:24:12 PM
Yo Rocky, don't take this wrong read it all please. You are from Canada, you are short and fat, you want to share a coupon book that is why. Ok ok give me a chance here. I have the feeling your heart is in the right place but your statement is like a bilboard sticking out there saying I don't like me why should you like me. Food for thought. Unless a woman is from Canada she finds it very difficult to understand the way you talk. You sound like a cheap scate because you want to share a coupon book you are not 90 years old. I would be offended if a man used a coupon for our first date, second date and so on. Say it like it is you said a few extra pounds is that 10 or 20 pounds? That is a few. If you are a large economy size say so because when we meet someone expecting a few extra pounds and a real porker is what we get we feel tricked, plain and simple. If you do not sound as if you accept your generous girth how can you expect a woman to accept it? HMMMM? How can I be so mean? Because I am 4'10" tall, at one time weighted 257 lbs and food was my friend, enemy, and almost the death of me. I know how that feels. Could you love yourself more than food more than a woman more than anything else on this earth, yes, then say it damn it.
Take the bull by the horns, have someone take a pic of you and proudly post it then change your profile to project a man who is kind, loving, accepting of his faults, loves himself and admits he has a food addiction. Don't they have Dr. Phil in Canada? Fat men disgusted me when I was fat too much of a reflection of my own shame. Now that I am a petite I have loved two very large men with all my heart. Number one is attitude toward yourself. If you are not comfortable with being FAT email me and I will tell you my secret. Good luck darling.
 Myrna43
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 188
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 10/3/2006 10:45:12 PM
cabman I think you are nice looking and sexy should have found you first. I am happy to hear that you found the one, that is great.

Yo Rocky I tried to email you but was blocked because of my age too bad. I just wanted to have a private conversation with you about weight. So I will tell you here instead. I was so miserable when I was fat I could not have been fun to be around. I could not accept it and 20 years ago I had my stomach stapled lost half of me. I was so cute and happy with myself that I attracted everyone but it wasn't that I was little it was my attitude. It is easy to get that weight off but it will do no good if you keep the old attitude and then there is the fact that you are a Canadian.LOL
 Myrna43
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 189
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 10/3/2006 11:00:26 PM
Hey Cabman Except for her height it sounds like you are dating me you lucky dog. You don't need this site it looks like you hit the jack pot. Show her you really are the one and take yourself off of here. I would never take a man seriously who stayed on a date site after he expressed his feelings to me. No matter what excuse you use I'm just here for the forums ha and no matter if she agrees you should still be here in her heart of hearts she does not. So get off of here and stop toarchering me, you are too cute, where is she I'm going to scratch her eyes out.LOL Remember me if she dumps you baby. The fact that you are fat is definately not a problem

Good Luck to everyone fat, ugly, short or drooling with snot running down your face, hang in there we will find what we want. I have a disgusting miserable scar on my face and neck but I do not whine about it ever. I think I am beautiful therefore I am.
 an_angel_4u
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 193
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Why won't Women Date Nice Romantic Overweight Gentlemen
Posted: 10/10/2006 5:32:33 PM
Hey Rocky...
there are some of us that love BIG guys...i am one. The late, great John Candy was my god!
Unfortunately many of the men i meet here (or anywhere) have children, or live to far away to pursue. I admit to being picky about many other things, but i would always choose a big guy over those muscular , got no brain, think they're hot guys anyday! Keep looking...your perfect match is out there somewhere.
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