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 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 403
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?Page 17 of 21    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)


Gotcha! You want a woman who is able to look past an endless stream of FWBs, and compare herself to them before she even writes.




He he....the RIGHT woman wouldn't be so insecure as to feel the need to compare herself to ANYBODY, she would be confident enough and secure enough to KNOW she's got them beat!
Ha! you tell so much of yourself....without even realizing it!

I won't date another insecure woman or a prude....been there, done that!


It's human nature for both men and women to subconsciously compare themselves to the competition that's out there. Just because a woman does this doesn't mean that she's insecure or that she will conclude that she's lacking. If anything, the person who feels the need to collect testimonials for validation and as proof that others of the opposite sex find them desirable is the one who is insecure.
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 405
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 7/11/2010 8:39:34 PM

:
Ha! you tell so much of yourself....without even realizing it!



Of course I do, because I don't ask peeps to write testimonials for me! I could always ask my BF to write one for me, but wouldn't that be redundant? Also begs the question - if your BF writes you a testimonial on PoF, shouldn't you wonder why?

Tootles.........


....makes no sense!

Neither does being on a dating site if you have a BF/GF....Oh, yeah....it's for the FORUMS.......and just in case.....
 REDDRAGON.
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 406
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 7/13/2010 11:30:51 AM

They are there as an ego boost for the person who needs them---apparently any modicum of attention, even if it's dripping with sarcasm, is better than none at all.


You mean like kinda pimping your self out like writing about your self in a POF account??? isn't that what people do?? telling every one how great of a catch they are???? PLEASE!

I consider the testimonies I write a civic duty to warn others about the people I have met!!!

 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 407
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 7/13/2010 2:49:58 PM
I consider the testimonies I write a civic duty to warn others about the people I have met!!!


OR to warn others about the people you DON'T want to meet! Most users delete unflattering testimonials, but I had one stubborn user who wouldn't do it. Instead, he continued to make negative retaliatory remarks against me in his profile---until I changed my testimonial to a more sarcastic, albeit less confrontational one.
 BentonHarbor
Joined: 3/2/2010
Msg: 409
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 7/15/2010 4:13:28 PM

It's human nature for both men and women to subconsciously compare themselves to the competition that's out there. Just because a woman does this doesn't mean that she's insecure or that she will conclude that she's lacking. If anything, the person who feels the need to collect testimonials for validation and as proof that others of the opposite sex find them desirable is the one who is insecure.


Huge assumptions about what or who is insecure---could it be this comparing oneself to the competition is the true insecurity? Anyone truly secure doesn’t give a hoot who else is out there---they’re assured that simply being themselves will prove sufficient for the type of partner they seek. “Collecting testimonials” could be construed as ego feeding or validation but like RedDragon asks isn’t the self authored profile more so of this? If anyone writes a more glowing description of ourselves than we do I’ve yet to see it!


OR to warn others about the people you DON'T want to meet! Most users delete unflattering testimonials, but I had one stubborn user who wouldn't do it. Instead, he continued to make negative retaliatory remarks against me in his profile---until I changed my testimonial to a more sarcastic, albeit less confrontational one.


Epic failure if this “sarcastic, albeit less confrontation one......” isn’t also accompanied by the little emoticons so many use online---those supposedly showing all this sarcasm etc etc. Oh wait---those don’t exist do they? LOL Anyone foolish enough to leave an unflattering testimonial that also allows others to see their profiles too leave themselves open to the same ridicule they hope to convey. Can’t see how an unflattering testimonial could be anything but counterproductive! IF someone leaves a bad testimonial I’d ask both parties about it---compare the different stories etc---wonder what tales we’d hear then huh? Would someone who gives any credence to a "bad testimonial" left displayed on purpose be anything more than greatly amused by it? Nawh----not hardly!

Also, can’t testimonials be deleted by either the profile owner or the testimonial author? If it remains yet who’s the stubborn one then? Another epic failure I sense..............
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 410
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 7/15/2010 7:57:37 PM

Epic failure if this “sarcastic, albeit less confrontation one......” isn’t also accompanied by the little emoticons so many use online---those supposedly showing all this sarcasm etc etc. Oh wait---those don’t exist do they? LOL Anyone foolish enough to leave an unflattering testimonial that also allows others to see their profiles too leave themselves open to the same ridicule they hope to convey. Can’t see how an unflattering testimonial could be anything but counterproductive! IF someone leaves a bad testimonial I’d ask both parties about it---compare the different stories etc---wonder what tales we’d hear then huh? Would someone who gives any credence to a "bad testimonial" left displayed on purpose be anything more than greatly amused by it? Nawh----not hardly!

Also, can’t testimonials be deleted by either the profile owner or the testimonial author? If it remains yet who’s the stubborn one then? Another epic failure I sense..............


Feh. (smirk)
 HeyJenny
Joined: 11/13/2008
Msg: 412
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 8/10/2010 9:39:20 PM
The only ones that I've seen remind me of the tacky photos where sleazy men love to show that they can put their arms around some either drunk or half-naked women who are usually getting paid to be nice to the customers for some promotion. I HATE photos like that but at the same time it's good to know who to avoid.
 umbrellaman21
Joined: 9/21/2010
Msg: 413
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/4/2010 7:19:21 PM
I saw this woman, she must've been on this site for ages, has 3 guys you left her testimonials, she didn't leave THEM a testimonial.

She didn't even return the favor.
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 414
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/4/2010 9:46:00 PM
Why do people insist on wearing out the tired line of: "If the person is so great, why aren't you with them?"
That is the most childish logic ever...let's see...maybe:

The OTHER person didn't feel the same.
There are lifestyle differences that prevent a moving forward.
They're good friends but not botanically compatible.
One is taken now.

There are a myriad of reasons you can think someone is great but not for YOU.

Geesh!


Successful profile? Hell yes! When you can downgrade your response rate to 0.01%, you’ll know you’ve had a successful ad campaign too. Good luck with that.......



Facepalm! I guess MY strategy works since I'm now seeing someONE! ...NOT someNINETYNINE!

LOL... designing a profile to eliminate is the secure persons way of finding the RIGHT one rather than being able to brag about getting tons of contacts!
 umbrellaman21
Joined: 9/21/2010
Msg: 415
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/5/2010 5:20:30 AM

Why do people insist on wearing out the tired line of: "If the person is so great, why aren't you with them?"
That is the most childish logic ever...let's see...maybe:


Well, that's probably the most common question asked.

One can only guess WHY the person is leaving a testimonial, I sometimes question if they ever really met in person actually.

I'm thinking they they did go out...once, but they decided that there was no chemistry, and for some reason felt motivated to leave a testimonial? I personally don't have that motivation to do that.

I have noticed in a lot cases it's always a one-sided testimonial, where the other person didn't return the favor.

OR....the guy was friend zoned, and never actually even met the person face to face, and hopes by leaving a testimonial, that he might win brownie points with her or something, and perhaps get a date? Just a wild guess.
 eastwood969
Joined: 12/21/2009
Msg: 416
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/5/2010 8:05:39 AM
I don't see any relevance to testimonials because everyone will have a different opinion, and I don't want to hear that other persons opinion. Can't people think for themselves? It's ok to have opinions on forums because it is a forum but when it narrows down to information on an individual its just unwanted gossip.
 My I
Joined: 1/23/2007
Msg: 417
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/5/2010 3:13:20 PM

I don't see any relevance to testimonials because everyone will have a different opinion, and I don't want to hear that other persons opinion

Look past the testimonial itself and maybe consider the quantity of testimonials..... I think it's a good testament when a lot of people post testimonials on a person's profile. It kinda suggests the person spoken about has, at the least, a good understanding of communicating with others.

Everything else may be subjective but I think this is a case where quantity does mean more than quality
 Captain_Wayne
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 418
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/5/2010 7:56:59 PM
I agree. It is sorta like a guy telling you that he test-drove a Mercury and liked it. Gee, that is what I want to know, who laid her before I got there.
 My I
Joined: 1/23/2007
Msg: 419
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/5/2010 9:47:39 PM

I agree. It is sorta like a guy telling you that he test-drove a Mercury and liked it. Gee, that is what I want to know, who laid her before I got there

I guess you're looking for a virgin.
Unfortunately due to the nature of dating sites many people look at testimonials and interpret them as a sexual innuendo. I learned rather quickly that we soometimes fool ourselves
 Captain_Wayne
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 420
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/6/2010 7:06:43 AM
"I guess you're looking for a virgin."

Nope, not even. Just not interested in knowing who gave her a test drive. When you were in high school did you have your mom call girls you were interested in and tell them what a great choice you would be? Not trying to be smartass here, but it is an apt analogy.
 1eastshore
Joined: 11/3/2010
Msg: 421
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/6/2010 6:18:28 PM
I might read the testimonials for fun. But they are usually a non-factor in my decision.
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 422
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 11/6/2010 6:41:25 PM
Not necessarily. I like going on forumites profiles, and reading testimonials about how "great," "wonderful" and "amazing" they are. These people must be 10x the person I am.
 Here_In_Florida
Joined: 4/4/2011
Msg: 423
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 5/11/2011 7:46:50 AM


It is sorta like a guy telling you that he test-drove a Mercury and liked it.[/qutoe]

That being said, I was reading this woman's profile, and saw this guys testimonial of her and saying how great a kisser she is. I got a total creepy vibe there.

Is she even aware of a testimonial that appears on her profile, or did she actually allow it to be there?


I've also noticed a lot of profiles that get a testimonial, but the person who left it never got a testimional in return from THAT person. I see this rather often.
 whatevs_meh
Joined: 1/4/2011
Msg: 424
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 5/12/2011 4:49:12 AM

Not necessarily. I like going on forumites profiles, and reading testimonials about how "great," "wonderful" and "amazing" they are. These people must be 10x the person I am.


You too? Yeah, they're all the same, especially "the old guard" . They all seem to start out, "My dear sweet friend..." and sometimes the exact same thing is said about other forumites. It's pretty funny actually.

What I don't get is that they are supposed to be an endorsement of sorts, and yet they are generally written by folks of the same sex, who have never met them and just go by what they have written in the forums. How can these "testimonials" possibly make them more attractive to potential dates? It's weird.

If I was still in the dating scene I'd like someone from the opposite sex to say something like, "Pretty good guy, he doesn't seem to be psychotic and he's not hung like a gnat." That I could get behind.
 whatevs_meh
Joined: 1/4/2011
Msg: 425
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 5/12/2011 4:51:43 AM

They're good friends but not botanically compatible.


Their plants don't get along?
 Here_In_Florida
Joined: 4/4/2011
Msg: 426
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 7/18/2011 4:30:25 AM
I've actually seen some men leave testimonials for a woman that almost come off as overly protective of that person or perhaps someone who has unrequited love for her. They say things like, "Don't you dare treat her badly, etc etc, etc " or "She's a great gal, and anyone would be lucky to have her."

At first, I thought some of these testimonials were so unusual that I wondered if the person was actually AWARE that maybe a random stranger left it? I wasn't sure how testimonials could be left, something similar to a Blog comment? I don't know.
 JAD2011
Joined: 1/9/2011
Msg: 427
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 9/4/2011 8:17:46 PM
Personally I see testimonials as a turn-off.

If the person has testimonals from past dates on their profile I pass them on by. I don't want someone who either can't commit, or needs to have someone sing their praises in hopes of getting dates or whatever.

Just my humble opinion though.

JAD
 Coyotefeller
Joined: 8/1/2005
Msg: 428
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 9/5/2011 1:14:21 PM
Testimonials are an offshoot from
social networks and don't belong on
dating services / meat markets ....
...scratch that ! ....Meet Markets I mean !
Once had a girlfriend who wanted me
to meet all her Old Close friends who were
all male....Jeesh !....same idea !
Just my 2 cents !
 SpringsDiver
Joined: 7/2/2011
Msg: 430
Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 10/21/2011 8:54:44 AM

Vchuksor - Hi I need to know how u can read your own testimonial.....How can I see these so I have a chance to take back my honor .


Your post was extremely difficult to decipher. If I understand it correctly, you want to delete a testimonial you left for someone else. If you click on Favorites, then Find out who has selected you as a favorite, find the person who's testimonial you want to remove and click Remove to remove YOU from their list of Favorites, i think it will also remove the testimonial you wrote.

If you want to check before doing this, go to the link below and ask your question.

http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingForum4.aspx
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