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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????      Home login  
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 HRWild
Joined: 3/1/2007
Msg: 26
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????Page 2 of 14    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)
I might have made a joke of this, but I come from a line of paranoid schizoprhenics. I know a lot about it. My mother's biological mother was a paranoid schophrenic and my biological father was as well.
Research has been done and results have been found that children of schizoprhenics tend to have all sorts of anxiety disorders. I know this to be true. I can also tell you that my older brother was ill and in complete denial (there is nothing wrong with me - you are all crazy!). Well he may have died from an asthma attack, but he was severely ill. My sister has some very severe problems as well. I was the only one out of the three of us who said I wouldn't be like my siblings and I spent a while in therapy.

I know that I would never date anyone with a mental illness because I grew up with it all around me.
 Molly1985
Joined: 4/15/2007
Msg: 27
Would you date someone who is mentally ill?
Posted: 5/7/2007 6:20:01 PM
It makes me so mad to see people put others down who are mentally ill. i cant believe wat i read in these forums. there are so many people that dont know wat they are talking about when it comes to people with a mental illness. everyone just tends to think the worst of people who are mentally ill, but they are human just like the rest of us why cant you just give them a chance. yes it can be frustrating if someone isnt getting the help they need but thats just their illness. its obvious to me that so many people really have no idea wat they are talking bout wen it comes to this topic. i guess you need to have a loved one meaning family member not wife or husband to know wat its really like. it isnt always bad, but it isnt always easy eaither.
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 28
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Would you date someone who is mentally ill?
Posted: 5/7/2007 11:45:09 PM
I once read that people would rather date a psychopath than someone who is fat.

Also, if you check out the mental hospitals and actually get to know the inmates, you discover that most of their reactions are fairly normal. Anyone would react like that if they were locked up in a mental ward. There are maximum security prisons that are easier to break out of. Think about this: a suicidal case can be locked up, so can an anorexic, as they are danger to themselves and can be sectioned in the UK (locked up against their will until a doctor says they are OK). But a serial killer like Manson can be locked up in facility that is far easier to break out of. Plus, really bad treatment.

Also, most are not criminally insane. Just victims of childhood abuse, or similar levels of trauma.

Pains in the ass for sure, but most people would rather know them than not. More interesting, for sure.

Compare a clinical depressive to a psycho-**** girlfriend who flies off the handle if you even mention a name that sounds like any exes of yours. Or one of those really pretty girls who hangs out in bars with any scum who wants her.

Check their traits in the DSM IV handbook.
You'll find the clinical depressive is not a definite clear cut case. Could be, but not all the time.
The other 2 will probably come out with 3 definite disorders.
But they're not diagnosed.

It's like "Catch 22". You're not really totally crazy if you can admit that you are.
It's the non-diagnosed in denial that will really crush your spirit and pour alcohol on your heart and then light it.
 Molly1985
Joined: 4/15/2007
Msg: 29
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/14/2007 9:58:35 PM
well said willow55 and yes i think you will find that Mental Health Awareness and education does lack a great deal in all countries and its sad that it does because it would help so many people to understand these things and help them to help themselves or their loved ones. as for the rest of you who obviously have no idea why not listen to match box 20's song unwell. it says alot for someone who has a mental illness although i think its more pointed to those with scizaphrinia. (exuse my spelling). Cause as Rob Thomas says they are not crazy they are just a little unwell.
 the amazing kat
Joined: 11/24/2006
Msg: 30
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Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/17/2007 11:46:53 PM
my ex had bipolar disorder...I am glad I dated him. It was both the best and worst relationship I've ever had. he was very passionate about everything, when all was going well... but he wasn't super good with his meds and so would get either depressed or manic at times.

If I was to date another person with a mental illness, I would really want him to be trying to work through his disorder and not just blaming others, or saying that there is nothing that he can do about it. I think that people with mental illness are just people...sometimes they need some special care but who doesn't from time to time...
 Woodsmoke and Oranges
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 31
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/20/2007 11:43:57 PM
I suffer from dysthemia. I am taking my meds. religously and have had therapy to help me deal with times when the depression comes back. I can look at myself in the mirror and say hey, I'm a good person and what will today bring. It's been a tough road but I know in myself that I am a strong person. A year ago I could not have said that.

So, yes I would date someone that is mentally ill. A huge caveat though would be as long as they realized that they suffered from a mental illlness and they were doing something about it for themselves. I've found that's the biggest issue. We are still responsible for ourselves and that we have to make those decisions for our own inner being. No point in doing it for someone else. It needs to be for yourself, to become healthy and to like yourself.

Peter
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 32
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Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/20/2007 11:44:43 PM
I have a good friend who was on a star trajectory until Schizophrenia knocked him down many years ago. He is such an incredibly talented, creative man, and is probably one of the most self-aware people I have ever met. He needs to be.. he is constantly monitoring himself and his feelings.

I would say I wouldn’t date someone with a severe mental illness… BUT I’d date HIM if he were interested (he’s not remotely interested.. and am I fortunate to have his friendship in my life). I know him and respect him and have seen his courage… I think that makes the difference when we’re speculating on the possibility of dating some unknown person with a mental illness.
 amazon214
Joined: 5/12/2007
Msg: 33
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/25/2007 12:17:43 PM
Here you go again dykestergal. What's wrong? Did they ban you from posting on thepink sofa so you came to this site to do what you do best?
I read what frbdn fruit said about you in thepinksofa forum and based on what she ( who knows you personally) says about you its you who is ill. You need to stop this.
I hope this woman you write of now sues you.
 gizmosellschickens
Joined: 5/20/2007
Msg: 34
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Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/26/2007 4:52:35 PM
Mental illeness goes thru phases, and OCD, PSTD, aniexty are terrible on the body, but sometimes medications does not work for certian people. Relationships are possible with most mentally ill people, but there a big difference between a person with aniexty disorder most thier life than shizoherina. I think some people suffer stay married for years, and a lot of people with mental illness use drugs legal or otherwise to calm the symtoms. The media is sick in throwing labels on people with mental illness. Most people are mentally ill symtoms vary most thier life. some Certian people will not know if they were suffering because they know how to hide the illness from people. Medications in realty masked certain illness that may be congitivie in nature, and need talk therpy than drugging with thorizine, xanax, cloziral. I would date a person mentally ill, but I want to know the long term history of thier actions since past behavior will predict future behavior. Mentall illness is a brain inbalance a lot of times, and people that accept that mental will never go away, but come in ebbs and flows over time tend to do better over the long term.
 mark45424
Joined: 12/1/2005
Msg: 35
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/26/2007 4:58:33 PM
I dated a woman who was mentally ill, at first she was really nice, but she always made boiled eggs for meals..
not much off a chicken egg fan, well, not all the time...
then she started dying them, like at easter time. and making me look for them...
then she really got nuts and dressed funny...
thats her in my profile picture...
 mark45424
Joined: 12/1/2005
Msg: 36
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/26/2007 5:01:19 PM
so who is crazy now ???
and who likes warren zevon?
 mark45424
Joined: 12/1/2005
Msg: 37
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/26/2007 5:02:29 PM
Tiger, yer nuts, but i like ya
 mark45424
Joined: 12/1/2005
Msg: 38
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/26/2007 5:03:15 PM
if you are not a little crazy then you are just a waste
 Karl the Hermit
Joined: 3/31/2007
Msg: 39
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Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 5/26/2007 6:00:18 PM
I don't really mind crazy girls, as long as they're MY kind of crazy. I do have to draw a line somewhere, though, and I think my line is the "Functionality Line." I have a hard time dealing with someone who's so messed up they can't even pretend to live a semblance of a normal life. I know I do a fair job of it despite myself...

IOW, anyone further over the rainbow than me is probably not a good match...

 writerguy1975
Joined: 5/20/2007
Msg: 40
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 6/30/2007 12:30:39 PM
Depends on what they're doing to combat their illness.
 taray_queen
Joined: 6/8/2007
Msg: 41
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 6/30/2007 12:56:32 PM
i was married to one for 22 yrs, never again in this lifetime.
 steve326a
Joined: 2/2/2007
Msg: 42
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 6/30/2007 10:48:10 PM

was married to one for 22 yrs, never again in this lifetime


Sad but true. I went out with 3 bi-polars, married & divorced last one. I'm sorry to say that I won't do it again. As hard as you try to make it work, their issues got too out of control to the point that you can't deal with it anymore short of ending up in the funny farm yourself. My divorce was what I would call self preservation. I have no hard feelings and wish her all the happiness she can find. I finally found someone who isn't mentally ill and is very intelligent and stable. What a refreshing change it is. Do I wish those with mental illness happiness? Absolutely, for no one asked to be born with mental illness. But having been there and done that with three of them, I myself won't be with one again. At my age, I deserve stability and normalcy and have finally found it.

Thanks,
Steve
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 43
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Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 7/6/2007 5:51:53 AM
Most people I meet do crazy things in relationships. Just some have a diagnosis.
 frenchpoodle
Joined: 8/18/2005
Msg: 44
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 8/2/2007 4:34:53 PM
Oh gush, I do understand you well. I had one my self. Thank god it is over but it took such a long time for him to leave me! He attempted suicide and his whole family blamed me for his psychotic behavoiurs adn attempts. He had a wife living in his wife s house, he did nto tell me he was jsut seperated! His wife left him for three years having an other boy friend and him and me we were living in a house they were still sharing. What a F*** Chaos! His whole life was a complete chaos!I jsut ran as fast as I could and never went back to him. There may be some good people with mental problems but it is very hard to deal with one. I feel bad for them but the way they treat you is really not faire at all. You help them and they come back and stab in you in your back and blame you for all their chaos and problems!
 schmoo6703
Joined: 7/19/2007
Msg: 45
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 8/2/2007 4:40:33 PM
I think I resent the comment that 99% of all POF ladies all suffer from mental illness (fuzzy therapy). With that particular moniker, perhaps he feels educated enough to make that judgement? Would I date someone with a mental illness? Well, when I ask myself that question I can only think of what it would be like to date me. I have depression. Well, I had depression. I take medication for it, so the symptoms are no longer invading my life. Does that mean I no longer have the depression? I don't really know. Perhaps if I went off my medication I would find out right smartly, but I've no mind to do that. Why? Because living while depressed is like living in hell, and when one is finally able to escape, then one certainly does not want to return. What would it be like to date me? Well, considering I'm one heck of a fun person, I think dating me would be a gas. I love doing all sorts of things, and meeting all sorts of people, and screening them for mental illness is not in the list of Top20 things I do on a date. What ever happened to getting to know someone's personality and spirit? Does having a mental illness preclude all that? Does having a mental illness mean that I fall under a "Do Not Touch" category because it might me a challenge once in a while. Now admittedly, there are some mental illnesses that present more challenges than others. Such as schizophrenia, anti-social personality disorder, paranoid personality disorder, and such. But even these are suffered by real people who can offer alot to many other people. What I'm trying to say is, maybe by getting to know the person first before discharging them because of something out of their control, you just might find your life enriched and enlivened in ways you never before thought possible. It's just a thought.
 Abangyarudo
Joined: 7/26/2007
Msg: 46
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 8/2/2007 4:59:29 PM
I've dated girls with a varying array of mental illnesses (but not to an extreme degree). I myself suffered from depression that resisted treatment but in actuality I found the more crazy ones are the ones that chose not to acknowledge that they have problems need to be worked on. No one is perfect I've adapted myself to a new creed whose goal is to be as perfect as possible and I've found those girls who can't see themselves and their own problems crazier then any chick who might have had a bad bout of being bipolar, depressed, or suicidal.
 judyarlinepuckett
Joined: 11/24/2006
Msg: 47
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Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 8/2/2007 5:05:17 PM
mental illness has different definitions for different people.
People won't seek help often for fear of bring branded
as someone mentally ill.
It depends on the circumstances,
is the person a danger to their self or others?
If there is abuse,or signs of hurting their self.
there definely needs to seek help for that person.
Different problems does not mean a person is
crazy.
 positivehikingnurse
Joined: 4/20/2004
Msg: 48
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Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 8/2/2007 5:27:43 PM
Maybe when I was younger, but not now. At 50 I have seen pretty much all the drama I can handle! Lol!! At this point in my life I am looking for someone who is physically, mentally, and emotionally healthy!
 stevelfun
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 49
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 8/2/2007 5:30:11 PM
I seem to find them all exclusively with really trying....
 Covet
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 50
Would you date someone who is mentally ill??????
Posted: 8/2/2007 6:02:06 PM
It's hard to say...I know I have dated some mentally ill men. I found out after I went on the date (e.g during the date). But If I knew someone was mentally ill when they asked me on a date if would depend on what the mental illness was...we can all have disorders of sorts but diseases are serious. I guess you have to ask yourself-is it worth it? Believe it or not some things are.
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