Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 182
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.Page 9 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

It goes both ways too - several times I was pleasantly surprised by a guy who was much better looking in person than in the pics. As soon as I saw my now-bf at the restaurant, I walked up to him and gave him a happy hug. He was like 200% better looking in person.

Wait -- why didn't you scoot out of there? It's not about looks but about having the audacity to post inaccurate photos, right? :)

If a guy looked pretty out of shape but had tons of similar interests and seemed like one of the "normal" ones and then some, and you agree to a date and he's athletic & toned, without being told, you're going to be happier than if you knew in the first place (surprise factor). You're not going to go "I hate it when guys lie!" And yes, some clever guys will do it on purpose -- to avoid the opposite -- looking worse in an eye of the beholder. They're not going to run from you if you look significantly better -- even if you told them you swayed that way on purpose.

We love it when they're better looking than their pics... we hate it when they're not. That's basically it.
 ochikergirl
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 183
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/13/2013 12:06:15 PM
That's true - the question shouldn't be "when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person" it should be "when the person turns out to be uglier than their pics". I agree that women should be REQUIRED to post a pic without makeup, and straight on - no angles or camera tricks.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 184
view profile
History
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/13/2013 2:38:05 PM
...I just don't like makeup in the first place. I think that's one of the things that keeps me from finding someone - women insist on wearing makeup, but I just can't do it. Yes, some people without makeup don't look so hot, but makeup just makes it worse. No matter how well it's done, or how yummy she looks, or how much I'll take a second look at a woman with makeup that looks good, it can't go any further than that and I'd rather have no makeup. And I know that one of the reasons people need makeup is because they use it. If you stop using it, you'll look better. And it's also because some folks can't live a proper lifestyle, with sunshine, proper diet, etc. That makes as much of a difference to your face as anywhere else. Moreover, the perception of attractiveness by both genders is warped by us always seeing each other with stuff like makeup - a lot of the things that are thought of as "blemishes" or "imperfections" are actually either attractive or no big deal. To me at least. But these things are covered up in shame and insecurity. Or because a woman is competing to look more attractive to a man than the next woman, so makeup is kind of a symptom of an arm's race. And finally, on top of all this, a woman will read what I just wrote here, and say kudos, that I'm a cool guy, blah blah blah...and then say something about how "society still expects a woman to be made up and professional". Yea. Ok. Yuck. We are society. Society isn't a mysterious other entity. It's us. So what are you saying when you say that society expects this? That you yourself are doing it? You are your society.
 peaceful_garden
Joined: 4/10/2013
Msg: 185
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/13/2013 3:02:11 PM
^^^Makeup is on it's way out. Proper skin care involving the care of a doctor is what I see with my friends and others. For example I use a prescription skin cream a local cosmetic surgeon has deveoped, it's amazing. We also apply sunblock every morning....it's crucial. There are laser treatments, microdermabrasion and many other procedures to keep your skin radiant and beautiful. I regularly see a dermatologist and her goal is help her patients to never use make-up again. And of course a great diet, lots of exercise and supplements.

Just so you know.
 MsWrong2013
Joined: 5/3/2013
Msg: 186
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/13/2013 7:32:24 PM
I'm sorry, it hasn't happened to me. *knock on wood*.

This is one of the reasons that I ask for many many many pictures prior to meeting someone. So I know exactly what they look like.

In fact, at some point, I posted pics of me that were old. Not 10 years old or so, but few years. But now, the pics are from last month and it has a date stamp on it.

I think lying and misleading someone on is deceitful. It obviously means they are hiding something or are uncomfortable with their looks. If that being said, they should be dating or wanting to date someone based on a lie. Everyone gets caught in a lie cuz it doesn't last forever.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 187
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/13/2013 9:30:17 PM

the question shouldn't be "when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person" it should be "when the person turns out to be uglier than their pics"

I would say "when the person turns out to be Different AND Uglier than their pics". If they look the basically the same, but just a noticeably a less-attractive version -- that doesn't mean they were deceiving. That's just a critique that they shouldn't post their Very Best pictures that by happenstance make them look better than they are. One way to go by things is to just judge on their WORST picture and ignore the rest. But I would say deceiving is if they were Myspace/angled photos for body weight.... or closed-mouth pictures with rotten or missing teeth.

I wouldn't say without makeup if they always wear makeup. Basically, how would they be prepared upon going out on a meetup/date? No Myspace angles, no -- I agree on that.
 ochikergirl
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 188
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/14/2013 11:26:46 AM
"How about you take the first step by having one yourself? If you want a trend to start you better put your money where your mouth is."

I'm a rock climber, ice climber, hiker, backpacker. I go without makeup and, sadly, without showers for as much as a week when backpacking (with deodorant of course)! I only go out with very outdoorsy/nature-loving guys (and they don't wear makeup either lol).

I HAVE ZERO MAKEUP IN ALL OF MY PICS EXCEPT FOR ONE. I do wear chapstick that has a slight tint of pink and I'll wear SPF 50 sunscreen of course - other than that, zilch, zero, nada makeup. The only one with makeup is guess which one? I was aiming for a "Bond Girl" look. I like makeup but it's expensive and it just comes off anyway. I do, however, go clubbing quite a bit, so I'll wear eyeliner and lipstick at night.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 189
view profile
History
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/14/2013 11:58:18 AM
^ I don't think that's accurate...there're a few good views of the face :)
 ochikergirl
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 190
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/14/2013 11:59:45 AM
I wasn't really in POF to meet anyone at this point. Both of the face shots that are on there now were on there when I was truly seeking someone. I've been off for about 4 months - both of the pics were about within 6 months. One one of them, I had lipstick (my work pic). When all the guys meet me, they tell me I look like 200 times better in person. That's because I'm not in hiking clothes lol I'm in something form fitting that shows my beeeewbs.
 ochikergirl
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 191
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/14/2013 12:02:42 PM
The issue isn't really about ME. It's about people posting pics without makeup. I mean if some people like it, then they should post one with and one without. I think guys should do the same thing - put pic of themselves in normal casual clothes, and one with a suit or dressed so that we know how you guys look cleaned-up :)
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 192
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/16/2013 4:35:01 PM
spauls49- I've had it happen too. I don't know why people do it. You are asking to have your feelings hurt being deceptive.
When it happened to me, I didn't back out and I wasn't mean, I stuck out the date but didn't go on another one.
People really should post recent pics, but such is the world of online dating.
A side note-I am not photogenic and look much better in person than in photos that I take, so people that pass me up based on my photo are missing out. For some weird reason, my eyes always look tiny in photo's and/or I looked stoned, lol :)
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 193
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 5/16/2013 4:44:49 PM
drinksthesunwithmyface- You like what you like, and that's fine. I'm not trying to call you out, but........what about sun damage/wrinkles? At 44, I barely have wrinkles because I'm fair complected and wear sunscreen.
I'm honestly curious if you are REALLY ok with a women who's skin looks like leather due to sun damage?
If you had to choose, wouldn't a woman who wears a REASONABLE amount of make up be preferable to one who looks 10 years older (or more) than they are because they get too much sun?
Just curious.
 Doctorsgirl62
Joined: 10/31/2012
Msg: 194
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 8/21/2013 4:22:23 PM
Oh he is a real jerk...Don't be fooled by his charm....
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 195
view profile
History
First date: when the picture in the profile look nothing like the person in person.
Posted: 8/22/2013 3:12:03 AM
bamagrl:

I don't feel like that's "calling me out", this is all about sharing opinions, and I'm ok with that of course. Leather skin versus reasonable makeup - The thinking I'm introducing is just that it's sort of 'backwards', for lack of a better way to say it = it's not saying that some cases of leather skin is 'hot' or not unattractive, but that makeup doesn't make it better and makes it worse. However bad it is, the conventional wisdom is that makeup 'fixes' it to some degree, but it doesn't. Again, this is just my opinion though. Plenty of people would disagree with me and I wouldn't say that they're wrong. However bad a case might be, the makeup is still worse, and I'd still choose against the makeup, but I know many women will never believe that because you think it's a choice of not having the leather skin and having the better look. But it's not...the leather skin is still there, and the makeup isn't better looking. I'm sure it sounds like I'm just trying to say something cool that I don't believe or practice in real life...but we're talking about something that's part of real life and normal, it's not intrinsically ugly, but we keep encouraging ourselves to look at it and think about it differently than normal real life, and our ideas of what makes attractiveness or unattractiveness gets skewed more and more, which is the only reason why we think the real person is unattractive and painting over them with something they're not changes that.

doctorsgirl:

I hope I'm not the jerk :\
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  >