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 arcticdude
Joined: 10/4/2008
Msg: 326
Dating artistic/creative people and relationshipsPage 15 of 16    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)
I might not be the most archetypal artist type to answer this, because I don't think I'm so terribly artistic...just persistant & really good at marketing...more 'creative', I'd say(refering to myself), than 'artistic'...but anyway... in keeping with my own view of myself, though I don't seek out 'artistic' women...I do very much apreciate someone who can think creatively...whether or not that translates into artistic ability is of little import to me.
If I had to choose, I'd actually probably prefer someone who 'appreciates' what I do, rather than one who could ‘execute' what I can.
I am drawn more to someone who shares my taste in music, or overall view of the world, than someone who shares my particular career path...
I am self employed...I haven't ever been with someone who was also self employed...I wonder if that would be more of a common ground than artistic ability...My guess is yes, in my case.
Creative? Yes. Artistic? Couldn’t care less, I think.

Good questions.
 TitusBreast
Joined: 3/18/2007
Msg: 327
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 3/14/2009 5:42:59 PM
Beware the ego freak! I don't care how effed-up/crazy a creative person is; it's the one who insists that any others' creativity pales in comparison to their own that drive me up a wall and compel me to give an attitude adjustment to STAT! I know some schizo-effectives who totally wrecked their most important love relationships by reckoning themselves their partners' 'mentor'. As if! What a-holes! At any rate, I'd try to find one (if I just had to try one out, that is...) who knows how to tactfully critique and/or who knows and practices humility (and takes their meds). Otherwise, a dry logistic might be able to force the megalomaniac to think about someone else besides #1. Good luck! Love, Titus
 charismatictadpole
Joined: 1/4/2009
Msg: 328
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 3/14/2009 5:46:44 PM
As a musician, I definitely find myself stimulated by other creative types.

If I don't date other "artists" then I find that I like to date those who appreciate the same kind of music that I do.

I do have to admit, though, that at times dating other musicians is difficult - kind of like the concept of having "too many cooks in the kitchen"
 mnem0syne
Joined: 2/28/2009
Msg: 329
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Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 3/14/2009 9:44:59 PM
For me, it depends on the creative person. I work in a creative field, but the work I do is actually for commercial entities, so it's an interesting mix. (I'm a web designer for a corporation.)

Here's what I like about creative types:

1. They understand the urge to create.
2. They understand the technical processes behind it. (Getting into the creative groove, needing time to concentrate, needing an objective eye, etc.)
3. They appreciate other creative efforts, even if it's different from their chosen creative outlet.

Here's what I don't like about creative types:

1. American Idol Syndrome: A creative person who thinks he's WAY more talented than he really is, and wants to make a career out of his chosen art without recognizing the fact that he actually really sucks.
2. They may be more or less talented than you, and are insecure enough to turn it into a competition.
3. They may want to spend all their time and money in their creative efforts, at the expense of things like paying bills and saving for retirement.

I think the most important quality a creative person can have is a realistic and pragmatic understanding of their level of talent, and what purpose their art has in their lives. I've dated two AIS sufferers, and man, there is NOTHING worse than someone who sucks and thinks they're good. First, you're subjected to a lot of really bad art. And secondly, it's just awkward, particularly if you are also creative. You know how you watch a particularly painful American Idol audition, and after someone humiliates themselves in front of Simon and gets torn to shreds, you think, "God, can't they hear themselves? Why didn't anyone TELL them they sucked? Wouldn't it be better hearing it from a friend or family member, instead of being embarrassed on national television?" That may very well be the conundrum you'll find yourself in, if you date an AIS sufferer.

But a good example of a positive match-up would be my sister and her husband. She's a web designer, he's a graphic designer. Both work in their fields, both have a pretty similar level of talent, he's better at some things, she's better at other things. They understand each other's work and can even help each other out on projects, but they also both have a very good idea about how to apply their talents in the marketplace. I think that is an ideal situation, where both you and your partner complement each other without competing or having unrealistic goals.
 mnem0syne
Joined: 2/28/2009
Msg: 330
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Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 3/14/2009 10:06:59 PM
Oh, and in response to Titus' post--I totally agree that self-declared "mentors" are totally infuriating to be around. (Almost as much as American Idol Syndrome sufferers.)

I think the tricky part is in telling the truth about someone else's work, without making it sound like, "I rule and you suck." Not only do you have to be careful to be fair in your critique, but the person asking for the critique (and they had better be asking before you give them one, unless you're a jerk, or they're about to go on stage in front of Simon and Paula) also needs to be willing to listen and understand the assessment objectively. Both people need to be able to separate their work from their feelings about each other. That can be really hard to do in a romantic relationship, particularly a new one.
 ikin
Joined: 3/8/2009
Msg: 331
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 3/20/2009 9:42:46 PM
oh hell yeah i look for another artistic/ creative person.. i feel like those people are my people lol we all kind of think alike, and have amazing ideas.
my first boyfriend was a complete book worm.. and it was good for a while but it was just a sex relationship.. but then i dated this guy for.. so long who was very artistic, and things were and still are great with us.. we just went our separate ways but still good friends lol..
there is definitely a big difference..

but i love all the uncreative people too lol
 raceme
Joined: 12/20/2008
Msg: 332
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 3/20/2009 10:32:31 PM
I've had great and not so great experiences with both. I've been a working artist my entire career. I teach now. About the only advantage another artist would bring is he would understand Figure Drawing is not strange or wouldn't raise his eyebrows thinking it was something it wasn't. But, I have to say, I like a creative person and this doesn't necessarily mean art. They can be creative with business, a scientist is a very creative person. The thing I really, really like is someone who is really good or masterful at something. Could be cabinetry. A great craftsman is big with me. Doesn't have to be another artist. I'm really experienced at what I do. Serious artists can be pretty competitive. But, doesn't matter. Love is love and people are people. I'm more interested in finding the guy who loves me and I him. What we do will fit when it's right.
 La Gioconda
Joined: 6/27/2008
Msg: 333
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 3/20/2009 10:42:43 PM
I think it's personal preference. And I also believe that alike attracts alike. Being a creative person, I am also drawn to creative people in my intimate relationships as well as friendships. What I find interesting about creative people is their mind, it's like parachute, always open and expanding. Creativity can take many forms, and can be expressed in variety of areas: music, art, writing, design, technology, architecture design, and so much more.

Also creative people tend to show this part of themselves in their way of dress, attitude (usually they are hillarious, personal experience), and there is some sort of spark I find in their facial expression, when they light up about something they love, they seem to be always curious, they are like cats. I tend to think of cats as being philosophers and mysterious, they have their own corridors/path they walk on.

I also tend to seek out creative types. I don't have much in common with non-creative, as I find non-creative people tend to have this world figured out, everything seems to be black and white, whereas I don't see it as black and white at all, but contrary. To me it's about lifestyle - bohemian.
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 334
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artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 3/21/2009 12:02:05 AM
Very cool thread!

Do people who are artistically talented, tend to seek out relationships with other artistic people?

I think the desire is still in the realm of fantasy for me. The last artist friend I was close to moved away and had another boyfriend... I would love to date another artist if I can... I just can find her somehow... Would it make for an interesting relationship!!!


Does a creative person feel that they have more in common, with another creative person?

My answer would have to be yes. You will have plenty of things to talk about, for instance. I dated a scientist as my last girlfriend. We could talk a bit about our own works, but we both could not go into technical jargon without losing the other.


Does an artist feel they'd be better understood, or their talents more appreciated by another artist?

Perhaps. Only another artist can understand what it took to paint that canvas. To most people, they equate that with the most common question of "how long did it take you to paint that"? Not knowing that the time you took to execute the artwork is only part of it... the seed of the idea may have been alive for years slowly growing...


Artistic people:
Do you intentionally seek out other artistic/creative people?

Not specifically, but I would like to since I've already dated non-artists before...
The thing I like about dating non-artists is that they aren't part of your world. Since I have made a small name for myself in my industry, I date women who aren't in it so that our relationship isn't influenced by what she thinks of my work, if that makes any sense... almost like if she only knew really who she was dating... I guess it would be like me dating someone famous in the dog show circuit. To that business, she is a star, but to me, she is just a regular woman...


Have you had relationships with artistic and/or non-artisic people? and did you notice a difference in compatability between the two?

One of my fantasy relationships would have to be with another artist. She and I would have our own spaces... she works at her art and I, on mine. In the middle of the day, she gets up to stretch and I do the same, we make passionate love on the living room, have lunch and then go back to our studios...
 ladyjane701
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 335
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Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 5/13/2009 9:47:17 PM
I have often wonder that same question OP.
As a graphic designer myself i usually tend to not really be attracted to others in my field. That's not to say that i wouldn't ever be. I'm not the typical artsy type as i do not frequent art galleries, art fairs and other artist type places or activities. I have no other artsy type friends (drawing, painting, sculpting, etc). But most of the friends i do have, do have a talent that i find intriguing. Whether it be working on cars, wood working or music.
I've never really settled on one type of person that i would date or hang out with as my interest are very brood and usually depends on my mood or who i am around at the time. I can get along with many different types of people.
Maybe i enjoy a bit of opposites attract type thing... to an extent.
 seattlerain11
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 336
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 5/14/2009 8:24:15 AM
Do people who are artistically talented, tend to seek out relationships with other artistic people?

I find on a romantic, personal level that I don't necessarily get along with most other artists. Not to place that blame on them, but I think I'm a bit more of a pragmatist and business-minded sort of artist... (but don't confuse THAT claim with 'organized' or 'Type-A' please.)


Does a creative person feel that they have more in common, with another creative person?
Does an artist feel they'd be better understood, or their talents more appreciated by another artist?

I think other artists understand the NEED to create. I have many non-artist friends, some for many years who have never understood why I just don't give it up for a steady 'day job' or at least get a 'real job' and create art as a sideline.


Artistic people:
Do you intentionally seek out other artistic/creative people?

No, but many of the places I frequent are stuffed with artists so I happen to meet more of them then the average schmoe.


Artistic people:
Have you had relationships with artistic and/or non-artisic people? and did you notice a difference in compatability between the two?

In general other artists make me get all twitchy because of their very low social IQ. Over the years, I've met a couple of artists that I REALLY liked though.

Something that hasn't been brought up...
One reason an artist might prefer a non-artist for a LTR (and visa versa) is the job / money scenario, but not JUST about the finances... I think a creative, artistic person can bring a unique quality and vision to a relationship, things which a very non-artistic, professional may not have but would like to have in their lives. The resulting symbiotic relationship could be very beneficial for both.

James, Seattle, Washington, USA
 farceur
Joined: 5/3/2009
Msg: 337
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 5/14/2009 8:37:02 AM
Yes, I agree! I need a woman who is good with money so I can paint, or draw, or write, or...I'll do anything artistic if she will take care of the money part of things. I would even sing for my supper. I want to be symbiotic, as long as it pays well and doesn't compromise the purity of my art. It's negotiable, too. For room and board I will create a comic strip. If she puts me between silk sheets and takes me around in a fancy car, I will write the Great American Novel. And if I get my own allowance, well, her lawn would be cluttered with marble monuments to our love. I have it in me to translate financial support into masterpieces on a daily basis. I just won't cut off my ear, for anyone, no matter how many riches they lay at my feet.
 vosche
Joined: 11/28/2008
Msg: 338
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 5/14/2009 8:43:27 AM
errr...it wont let me delete..without filling in something else to fill the space
 _seven_
Joined: 12/12/2008
Msg: 339
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 5/14/2009 8:51:19 AM
Creatives are a bunch of "nutbars!" I know, 'cos I'm one of them! Relationships with other creatives is both good AND bad. Another creative may "get" you, but I think most of us tend to be a bit self-involved, and this can create strain when both of you are. Then again, creatives also tend to be very expressive and passionate, which can make for a very interesting ride! Non-creatives can be a nice balance and keep us more grounded, but they've got to be somewhat empathetic to our flightiness and off-the-wall thought processes.

We ARE a difficult bunch, but - IMO - worth the effort!

 Blind_Archer
Joined: 12/10/2008
Msg: 340
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artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 5/14/2009 9:58:31 AM
I am artistic.

I am drawn mostly to artistic people.

I have had relationships with non-artistic people.
I don't feel a connection with them when it boils down to it.
And I can tell they feel disappointed also, that they are unable to connect with me.
Sometimes they even feel dwarfed by the very things about me that they were attracted to in the first place, because they know they cannot collaborate with me.

For example, I draw and perform music. Non-artistic types have been drawn to me because of some of my artistic endeavors which they find interesting. Yet they feel inadequate because they cannot draw with me, or perform music with me. And I am sad that I cannot collaborate with them either.

I think it works better when two artistic people join together.
 Nina1000
Joined: 5/28/2009
Msg: 341
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 7/26/2009 12:46:12 PM
Artistic people:
Do you intentionally seek out other artistic/creative people?


No, I seek the balance of a logical/pragmatic personality. I have always liked accountants or men that work with their hands. The artistic-intellectual type has never appealed to me sexually.

I guess I could live with a sculptor, but not with a writer or a poet.........I need to sense Solidity of character and of lifestyle. I enjoy being around GROUNDING types, they are a better fit for me. Artistic people have often volatile personalities. The physical connection for me is more grounding than simply the mental connection. I find artistic men quite airy....fleety and less down-to-earth- realistic than non-artistic personality. I appreciate somebody able to think linearly, logically and simply, being myself quite complex and not linear at all. Men with a mechanical/logical inclination and a solid grounded physic are usually my preference. It's interesting ..........I have never found an intellectual type compatible with me sexually. Those that live in their mind are not a good fit for me. I also need practical stability/a routine based lifestyle to ground my artistic tendencies. A bohemian lifestyle is not for me.

I prefer being surrounded by simpler and less complex personalities than myself, at the risk of not being completely understood. Too much complexity sucks. I have enough of mine. How much paradox can one take??? How much Intellect can one take?

Give me the builder type of guy and I am happy. As far as spiritual/mental connection goes, I am usually able to find artistic friends who understand my thoughts or monks. Monks with an artistic background understand me very well, I have found. yes, a creative type gets me, but I could not live with one. Too much ups and downs, creative phases, manic states and so on.....Some artist are too Ego driven and self-absorbed for my taste.



 xlmagboy
Joined: 6/28/2010
Msg: 342
Dating artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 2/24/2012 9:25:03 AM
Did you remember to oil your question mark key after you typed that?
 floridian407
Joined: 4/12/2006
Msg: 343
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Posted: 2/24/2012 5:55:05 PM
Okay, this is probably an YMMD post. but here goes. I consider myself to be a creative type. I am also a woman. But I don't lump all creative people into one category or mindset, It just doesn't work, its not effective. Moody, self centered . domineering ,etc? Guess I have met and known other creative people, and even as a group, I don't see them that way. As a group or separately, its like the population of various countries-a melting pot, perhaps a rainbow or a bowl of jelly beans-different personalities, ranging from shy-a local musician, to way out there-a variety of people. Some are even nerdy or geeky.
To me its like you said re: the people individually. Some I'm totally in sync with, others, I think there needs to be an in depth manual..My only issue is finding the single ones, that's not so easy..Some of my male friends are also creative, but we've discovered we are better as friends or neighbor/friends, so its back to square one.
 PairODachs58
Joined: 2/20/2017
Msg: 344
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Posted: 2/25/2017 5:00:20 PM
I know this is a very old post, but wondering if anyone has found any answers in the last 9 years to this question.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 345
artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 2/25/2017 6:06:16 PM
the answer is....It Depends :)

Someone who's entire life is about art, may not date the dumb jock. But they sure might like to end up in bed with his Adonis body :)

Those who enjoy beauty, may suffer for their art..especially if they are attractive enough to get the uncreative hottie. But the quiet church mouse who spends her time in the library? who else is she going to meet? of course, when we're young, we want to be accepted, when we mature, we may be more about dating and less about "gettin' some". Personality might be more important, esp. to those who have much more of it. Those who have more body than personality to share, frankly, might see the world thru that prism. Looks may be more important to them b/c...what else is there?

if you've been creative/inventive, you likely know that growing up, there's a lot of people who can't look at something you propose, and see the potential for success. You have to invent it and make it work, and then people can see the actual success and realize you're a success. By then, of course, you don't need their support anymore.

the more faceted you are, the easier it may be to deal with those who are one dimensional. You can work around their shortcomings, if you feel you have to. not just in dating, but in office politics, too :) But the person who only focuses on work, may have terrible people skills/bedside manner.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 346
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Posted: 2/26/2017 7:59:04 AM
People think common interests are important, it's one of the biggest myths, but that's not the case at all. If two people are attracted to each other they will want to spend time together, and if they are easy to get along with, they will find plenty of things to do together. Who doesn't like a walk on the beach with the right person?

It's about common interest in each other.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 347
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Posted: 2/26/2017 4:15:50 PM
Hell ya
One has paint
One has brush
And a masterpiece is born
 Perspektiv
Joined: 2/11/2017
Msg: 348
artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 2/26/2017 5:13:46 PM
I find as an artist myself, I tend to gravitate towards creative minds. Not necessarily artists, though.

I think someone that's able to think outside the box to me, keeps the relationship interesting and the spark there. It goes both ways, in terms of being creative and keeping things interesting.

I also tend to prefer creative people as they tend to be unconventional, and I tend to hate routine. I think routine is destructive to a relationship, as it takes away from your appreciation of the little moments you get every day.
 ebolakitty
Joined: 3/19/2016
Msg: 349
artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 2/27/2017 8:50:39 AM

I know this is a very old post, but wondering if anyone has found any answers in the last 9 years to this question.


Harking all the way back to the OP, the answer is that artists don't seek relationships. Artists have groupies not soul mates. The excelling in the art, whatever it may be. is first, last and everything in between.

There are lots of people with lots of entertaining talents who do seek relationships. They aren't artists though. At best, they are capable posers. Hipsters who wear cheap sunglasses and churn out pedestrian crap and popular fluff call themselves artists but true artists wouldn't deign to piss in their mouths. Posers want to be understood so they do exactly what all of the other "creative" people are doing. Artists produce what the ART demands of them.

Posers seek relationships with other people to be understood. Artists already have unbreakable relationships with the muses alone so that they, themselves, may understand.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 350
artistic/creative people and relationships
Posted: 2/27/2017 10:27:34 AM
First off, the "artistic/creative" person's goal is not to "excel" (in the art, whatever that's suppose to mean) but, it's a good description from someone that is looking in from the outside. The artistic/creative are usually never "understood" by the majority. They have something within them, that yes, others that have the same, can understand.

With that, there are some artistic/creative that can adopt to another's artistic/creative quirks, talents and practises. As an example, when these types are "lost" within whatever is going inside their minds. No one will, at that time, be able to "get" or "enter" into their world at that time. Another artistic/creative person will understand that, and leave well enough alone until the time is right. They know/understand that the other is deep within their work/expression. Another example would be when people "look" at things, and then try to explain what they "see". The artistic/creative understand and know that what one sees, another, more than likely will not. That, in a lot of relationships would cause confrontation but, with the artistic/creative it usually does not. Rarely is it ever "black" or "white".

Another thing that should be pointed out is how the artistic/creative person expresses themselves. Some write. Some paint. Some sculpt. Some garden. Some write, tales, poetry, music, etc. Some play, music, act, etc. Some sing. Some decorate. I've seen "successful" relationships between artistic/creative couples when they are not involved in the same type/form of expressions. I've also seen some wild, not so successful relationships involving two people that play within the same arena, though, I don't know if it really wasn't "successful" but, just ran it's course. That, I do believe can and does happen in any relationship, though people that believe relationships should last "forever" would disagree with me on that one.
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