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 smith2267
Joined: 8/26/2005
Msg: 5
using a sex buddy for sperm?Page 2 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I am of the opinion that a father owes more to his offspring than money...and as the mother, it is not within your power to change that.
Just because nature makes it possible for women to become mothers without the father's knowledge doesn't make it right.
 AbstractAstra
Joined: 1/31/2007
Msg: 6
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 2/16/2007 5:58:22 PM
I wouldn't do it. It's wrong to basically steal his sperm and not tell him. But even if you did tell him and he was okay with it, from many other people's stories I can see it causing problems down the line. He might want to get involved in his child's life later, even if you don't want him to. Or maybe he will want nothing to do with the child, and they will be desperate to know their father. Heartbreak all round.
 smith2267
Joined: 8/26/2005
Msg: 17
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 2/16/2007 7:00:51 PM
You know, I actually have mixed feelings about this thread.
It is sort of nice to be sized up just for my genetic contribution to her offspring for a change.

But I grew up with an absent father, and nothing can make it right for a man not to be a father to his children in my book.
 MDB78
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 20
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 2/16/2007 9:44:54 PM
You're only 23??

Damn girl, slow down!

What's the hurry? 23 is too young to be having kids. You're practically still one yourself, and not to sound sexist, but raising a kid is going to be alot of work with no dad in the picture. You might find you don't have time for that career of yours. Also, having a kid will make it harder to find that perfect guy, as alot of guys don't date women with children.

If you like kids, volunteer to be a big sister or spend time with nieces or nephews if you have them.

If I was this guy, I'd say absolutely not, for the reasons posted above.

If you must do this, you're probably better of w/an anonymous donor.
 innocentantic
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 22
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 2/16/2007 11:09:54 PM
I've considered becoming a sperm donor for a friend. It's not something to take lightly. The fact that you were capable of asking: "should I tell him" is enough to say that you are not ready to be a mother. Family is a big thing to you, there's no reason to think it is any less important to him. Without any respect for his seed, you won't have the empathy and humility it takes to raise a child.
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 32
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/11/2007 4:32:06 AM
You can play with it all you want.
But just don't make anything with it without my permission.
 uballe
Joined: 5/26/2006
Msg: 34
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/11/2007 8:31:42 AM
I'm sorry, but you're EXACTLY the kind of person men should be very, very, very afraid of. If you're willing to deceive a man and get pregnant, you're probably also VERY capable of other devious acts that would not only hurt him, but a potential child as well. Please, think before you go off and ruin a persons life.
 Rebellious
Joined: 2/5/2006
Msg: 35
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/11/2007 8:58:48 AM
Hey I'd love to have a child, and my sperm is much better than your "sex buddy's", so why don't you message me instead. Don't be a sperm thief, you deserve a man that loves and adores you and his child.



 Terrible Flirt
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 42
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/11/2007 5:44:23 PM
He's probably given you a few gallons already. What did you do with all of that?
 Wullis
Joined: 7/2/2006
Msg: 43
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/11/2007 8:26:33 PM
I had a girlfriend approach me on the same subject years ago, she wanted no longterm commitment and didn't want any participationor support from the father and would go to a lawyer and make a contract. She just admired the type of person I was and thought I might pass this on. I told her I could not know I had a child and not participate in its life. (This is the sticking point I think in knowing the person that donates sperm, As their lives progress family becomes more and more precious). This conversation went round and round for a couple of months and then one day I came home and she was gone, Just a voice mail saying goodbye. And I wondered for years if she had stopped with the birth control and left when she was pregnant. Next time i saw her was 4 years later ..........she ran up hugged me and said you have to come and see my little girl. My heart dropped and instantly I felt cheated. It turned out the girl was 2 1/2 and not mine. But it was enough to know thats not the way to look back on your childs life. And at some point in his life this man would look back and feel cheated. Even if you didn't tell him. Your families are close, how long do you think it would be before someone noticed (eyes, a mannerism, the way the child walks, how many months since the last time you were togethrer.

If you MUST have a child before you find the right guy...... do it anonymously with a service or someone that could never find out
 Seavoyage
Joined: 1/18/2007
Msg: 50
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/23/2007 8:33:10 AM
I didn't know we had a nuclear holocaust and are now back to 500 A.D. where people usually die by 40 and girls have children sometimes at 13, and it is no big deal at all. My point is if you are 23, you've got at least 10+ years easy to find a good person for you. You've had some bad experiences and assume that's all you can get. You need to work on your attitude. A child needs to be raised by someone who feels positive about his or her life and what they can get out of it including from a spouse, a marriage. Take your time and relax.
 snowboardMTBikeguy
Joined: 11/21/2006
Msg: 51
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/23/2007 8:43:00 AM
I have been asked to be the donor twice in my life...once from couple friends who were having troubles getting pregnant and the other from a girl in your situation......
I could not do it knowing that when I see those kids I would know they were mine and I could not say anything about...it would crush me...I love kids, for me not to be their dad would rip apart my hart....I do not suggest you do it...even if you do not tell him and he has the inclination the child is his and he decides to stand up and claim his child, there could be some serious issues.

I will say it was quite flattering when I was asked, that’s for sure.

Not a good idea at all.
 IdoAllmyOwnStunts
Joined: 1/24/2006
Msg: 52
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/23/2007 8:45:58 AM
id do it.. but only if the test tube is ribbed for my pleasure
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 that sam i am
Joined: 10/27/2006
Msg: 54
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 3/23/2007 12:33:53 PM
how is it stealing? like he comes in the condom...doesn't matter if you throw or keep it after that.
why do you reallly wanna be a single parent though? haven'y you noticed? dating is much harder like that
 Wylie_Coyote
Joined: 5/12/2007
Msg: 57
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 10/3/2007 12:08:03 PM
OP,

you have an obligation to put the father on the birth certificate. In the event that you or the baby had issues and required financial support this father would be legaly responsable.

The government would seek out the father and place the financial burdon on him. This would be out of your control.

USE A SPERM BANK!!!!!

J Mac
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 66
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 12/4/2007 6:46:40 PM
I would require a woman with a better spell checker. So you wouldn't work for me.
 Ave Caesar
Joined: 11/11/2007
Msg: 74
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 12/5/2007 7:09:46 AM
Seems like a potential legal morass. I'd get a lawyer and sit down with him and the attorney.
 sexythaiflower
Joined: 9/30/2007
Msg: 77
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 12/10/2007 3:24:46 AM
why not? if u want baby, then do it. he never know. most man have baby and go find new wife anyway.
 aSydneyMale
Joined: 5/16/2006
Msg: 78
using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 12/10/2007 5:43:36 AM

why not? if u want baby, then do it. he never know. most man have baby and go find new wife anyway.


I'm trying to work out whether this reply and your profile are a windup or not.

If you are genuine, then you are a nasty little piece of work aren't you? And to think of all of those moronic western males winging their way to Thailand thinking you would make the 'perfect wife', until the money runs out, that is.

Exactly the reason why I would choose a western woman every time.
 dreamer3269
Joined: 2/19/2006
Msg: 82
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 12/10/2007 12:50:48 PM
Ask him..If its OK with him then there is nothing horrible about it.
 Seavoyage
Joined: 1/18/2007
Msg: 85
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 12/10/2007 11:14:09 PM
Taking someone's sperm is kind of selfish in the end. You are not considering the father and the child adequately. I can understand you have had horrible luck with men. In my opinion, we attract the kind of people in our lives, and that includes me having attracted someone who caused me a lot of grief. I take responsibility for that fact. You have to look at how you live your life, the kind of men you are choosing, and who you are, because, at the end of the day, even when the child grows up, you still have to deal with yourself. I am sorry for the pain inflicted upon you by the various men in your life as I am sorry for the pain I suffered before in my life from the opposite sex, but when things are not working, it is time to make changes in life... You say guys never treat you right, but you do know that there are many men who can treat women right. I know there are women who can treat men right.
 taogca
Joined: 7/22/2007
Msg: 102
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using a sex buddy for sperm?
Posted: 12/31/2007 4:09:43 AM
OP

Since you and him seem to be longterm f##kbuddies anyway, if I was him, it would likely be alright. Advise asking/talking with him about lack of expectations concerning support. If he has no other children, he might desire some contact with the child.
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