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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > Does she still want a man to open her car door.      Home login  
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 24DegreeAngel
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 26
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Does she still want a man to open her car door.Page 2 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
I think it's sweet for him to do those little things.... never had the coat thing.... I like pulling out my chair, grabbing doors, carrying things for me, leading me by a hand on the small of my back....
 TheDancingQueen
Joined: 11/11/2006
Msg: 27
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/10/2007 3:40:57 PM
I enjoy the old fashioned rituals of dating. But more than anything, it's just someone trying to be polite.

I notice fewer and fewer men do it. Is it because some are raised without manners? Probbaly some. But I have a gut feeling many got the "I can open my own door" garbage at some point. It's just that overly zealous feminist garbage that's out there.

The entire feminist movement need a good hard slap in the face. There's this entire "I don't need a man" vibe they give and encourage, yet all they seem to do is pine about issues with men. It's a giant contradiction.

I think men should open doors all the time, not just for dates either. But because it's polite. Manners has nothing to do with power trips over some guy trying to control you because you've got two heavy bags and he'd like to help you carry them or he will open a door for you because he wants to make a good impression.

I laugh when I see women make these complaints about "Hear Me Roar, I Can Open My Own Door" then **** later about how no men ever approach them. Uh, did it ever occur to some of them that the act of being polite might have been a male's attempt to get in a few words and get to know you? It's funny when I hear about people who complain about what they don't get and then complain some more because they themselves aren't giving anyone an opening to provide those things.
 pinklollipop
Joined: 12/3/2006
Msg: 28
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/10/2007 4:01:35 PM
I have to agree with you on this one Dancing Queen.
I took a feminist class in college...one of those pre-requisites I had to take for credit completion, and I have to say that the class drove me nuts! I would ask questions similar to the one you posed in your post, like; "how are we, as women, any better than men if we dedicate a whole lecture to bashing the male sex?" and you know what.....not one classmate, even the instructor could give an answer to that question....yet the same "bashing" continued on for each and every lecture.
I feel sorry for the guys that genuinely are gentlemen and try to show a friendly gesture but get turned down because the female views their gesture as insinuating that they are "inferior to men".......gimme a break!
maybe this is the reason why so many people in our world are scared to help each other out (male or female) for the fear of the person they are helping is going to bite their head off!!!!!
 always4real
Joined: 1/20/2007
Msg: 29
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/10/2007 4:58:48 PM
OMG Hell yes!!!! LOL. I think it's always sweet when a guy offers to help his girl put on her coat or opens the car door for her.

I wish more guys were like that!!
 stephntx
Joined: 2/25/2007
Msg: 30
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/10/2007 6:21:02 PM
It is so nice to see men still do this. Kudos to you :)
 dorionland
Joined: 10/21/2006
Msg: 31
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/10/2007 6:53:14 PM
Ladies first. I hold her door, wait for her to sit first, allow her to order first, open the car door.

If she want to be a liberated woman she can do something nice for me. Or say something then I won't do it. I don't mind. But that's how I was brought up.
 Grrrrrl
Joined: 2/28/2007
Msg: 32
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/10/2007 11:52:02 PM
Open the door, pour her wine first, help her put her coat on.

There's nothing wrong with chivalry...even in 2007...

HELL YEAH!!!
 Leigh AKA PL
Joined: 4/20/2006
Msg: 33
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Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/11/2007 3:14:03 AM
Mzscrubber

catch 22 situation isnt it


personally im pretty capable of opening doors myself roflmao!!! i know its a romantic gesture but its an unnecessary one. kinda like helping me off with my coat.

dont be old fashioned... be original.

find somethign thats going to set you apart from every other guy out there trying to impress. because in reality thats all it is.. hes just trying to impress you. after a few dates the door opening stops.

its much more romantic having something done for you out of the blue or original.
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I personally don't agree at all with your statement.Yes I am capable of opening doors myself,but to have a genleman do it for me shows me he has respect,old fashioned or not,I love it and it is quite rare now aday's, so lovely to hear the op thinks this way and so wish more men did this.... no offense op but your age may have something to do with your way of thinking and I for one find that very attractive,and this is why I go for older men.I am a girlie girl and love a man to treat me like a lady.
 Charlie Shift
Joined: 12/5/2006
Msg: 34
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/12/2007 9:45:45 AM
I hear that some women don't like for you to open the door for them or help them on with their coat these days, but a lot of us DO. For me, it gives me a very "protected, taken care of" feeling inside and I love it! Example: I did a ride-along with a deputy Friday night. I do this on a regular basis so I've ridden with lots of officers. This one opened the door for me every time I got in the car! It made me feel like a woman, and I enjoyed his company even more. Not only that, when I think of him, I'll think of how special he made me feel.

I think you should always try to be a gentleman until the woman you're with tells you she doesn't want you to do these things for her. Maybe you are old-fashioned but there are lots of women out there of all ages that appreciate an old-fashioned man. Makes us feel like old-fashioned woman, and that rewards for that are....well, let's just leave it there: There ARE rewards!
 prolibertate
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 35
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/12/2007 10:50:49 AM

catch 22 situation isnt it
personally im pretty capable of opening doors myself roflmao!!! i know its a romantic gesture but its an unnecessary one. kinda like helping me off with my coat.
dont be old fashioned... be original.
find somethign thats going to set you apart from every other guy out there trying to impress. because in reality thats all it is.. hes just trying to impress you. after a few dates the door opening stops.
its much more romantic having something done for you out of the blue or original.


Considering that some men have 1) never been raised to be polite, 2) bought into the feminazi garbage, or 3) simply don't think about it...it *is* becoming pretty original - and rare - to find a guy who will be courteous, respectful, and have manners...and I say bring more of them on...While I'm perfectly capable of opening my own car door - or any door - I still like when a guy does it for me; I like when he helps me on with my coat; and brings me flowewrs for no reason at all...I don't take it that he's doing it because I can't do it for myself; I take it that he wants to do this for me and it would be rude to not let him do so.

I also disagree that all men are doing this to impress someone - when they are just doing it to impress, those are the cases when it stops soon after you're a couple. And it's pretty easy to see if this is something a guy is doing because it comes natural to him or if he's trying to impress you - if he holds doors for other people - regardless of gender or age; if he's polite and friendly with waiters/waitresses; if he treats strangers courteously...then that's simply who he is, and he's not doing it to impress his date. I like being treated like a *woman* and having a man be courteous and respectful isn't being treated like a *helpless* woman...JMO
 Randominternetguy
Joined: 12/25/2006
Msg: 36
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Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/12/2007 2:51:12 PM
I open doors, help with chairs, drop off in front of restuarants all the time. Not just for dates, but my sister, daughter, anyone really. In fact, if a woman wants to wait, I will come around and open her door to get out of my car also. I do all that because that's the way I was raised and that's what I want to do. In that vein, I'm not going to pull a muscle to do it, but when at all reasonable, I will.

However, that all changes when someone "demands" I do those things. For whatever reason, that just irks me. And I've had women tell me right up front that's what they expect from me, and that tends to make me want to do less.

I know, it's just me being a head case, because I really don't want to change what I do for someone else just because they asked me to do what I normally do anyway. But depending on how aggressive she is, I know it will affect my behavior. Oh well, so sue me!

--Bob

P.S. I just realized this was in Ask A Girl, sorry.
 MdmeButterfly
Joined: 2/28/2007
Msg: 37
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 3/12/2007 2:55:57 PM
I love it when a man is like that... shows me that he is very respectful, and kind... gives me goose pimples and butterflies when a man does that for me because it is SO VERY RARE!
 dandydan45
Joined: 9/24/2006
Msg: 38
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Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/18/2007 6:15:22 AM
Its not that we think about it. I just do it - it feels nature like you would have to go out of your way not too. Maybe I was programmed as a boy growing up.
 charliemcsd
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 39
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Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/18/2007 6:39:02 AM

Am I considered old fashioned if I still help a lady put on her coat or open the door for her. Opening a car door is that a sign of respect or just being an old bugger. How about pouring her glass of wine first. To be honest it would not feel right not doing all these little things.


No, you will not be considered old fashioned. Regardless of all the psycho-babble we hear, women like this stuff.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 40
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/18/2007 7:38:56 AM
Everyone is brought up differently; those gestures were expected from men by women a lot more years ago than they are now. While I appreciate courtesy from either gender, the only difference now is I don't feel entitled to it, expect it, or take "points" away from someone because they don't do it.
 grizzelda
Joined: 6/25/2006
Msg: 41
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Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/18/2007 7:46:00 AM
I am one of those women who doesnt like it. I dont know why, I just dont. I have however actually had a conversation about this with a man and was very straightforward and just explained my feelings on it. He was OK with it and we still had a nice time. Its not about being rude or ungrateful, it makes me uncomfortable so I am careful to explain my thoughts on it.
 lovegoddess567
Joined: 3/17/2007
Msg: 42
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/18/2007 4:59:30 PM
Old fashioned is great actually in my opinon. My mum has raised me old fashioned. I think it's great what girl doesn't want to be treated with respect?
 Miss_Bianca
Joined: 5/6/2007
Msg: 43
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/18/2007 8:26:24 PM
I'm one of those people that feels like when a man does it, he's borderline being phony. You just know in your heart one day he will stop opening the door for you, and pouring you a glass first, so why bother starting?? There's a song lyric that says something to the effect of....I treat you bad at the beginning of the relationship so that way you can never say "why you don't treat me like you used to"

Kind of twisted...but maybe it's better then being let down later...
 asianbunny76
Joined: 5/2/2007
Msg: 44
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/18/2007 10:19:20 PM
automatics are necessary. people are getting lazier. humans wants convenience now a days. you seldom meet women who wants their door open.
 asianbunny76
Joined: 5/2/2007
Msg: 45
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/18/2007 10:19:45 PM
why dont u like a man opening a door for you?
 PHK
Joined: 12/14/2006
Msg: 46
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/31/2007 12:08:28 PM
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Yes
And I'll reach over and unlock your door

How about pouring her glass of wine first.
Yes
I notice and appreciate acts of kindness... especially if they aren't just for me (e.g. you'll hold the door open for the person behind me too). It speaks to your upbringing and character
 hyacinth1974
Joined: 5/17/2007
Msg: 47
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 5/31/2007 12:17:10 PM
I personally like it when a guy opens the door for me - it's kind of classy. It isn't a must, though. It's sort of a bonus because it's not something I expect, but when it happens all I can think it "aaaaawwwwww, he really likes me."

But I HATE it when he orders for me in a restaurant. And I can pour my own wine. Really, I can do everything for myself but there's something about the car door that gets me every time.
 cleocat218
Joined: 3/19/2007
Msg: 48
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 6/13/2007 2:52:06 PM
Yes, without a doubt, I love being treated like a lady. It is a special man in my eyes who takes the time to actually show me that he values me this way. I can certainly do all of these things for myself, but, when he does take care of me this way, I am more endeared to him.
 oursong
Joined: 11/10/2006
Msg: 49
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 6/13/2007 2:57:33 PM
Awe, chivalry.

When I talk to my grandmother she tells about the way it used to be, and one thing that I wish would have carried with the times are those chivalrous actions. I will tell you my top 3, ones that she has told me but I never see.

1. walk on the side walk closest to the road (so when the horses go by, mud doesn't get on the girls clothing)
2. put down your coat over a puddle (so that the woman doesn't dirty her shoes)
3. bring a present/gift for a first date (a small box of chocolates or flowers are great)
 ~The Siren~
Joined: 2/25/2007
Msg: 50
Does she still want a man to open her car door.
Posted: 6/14/2007 6:39:11 PM
OP,....Yes I do,....and hope to one day find a man who values his chivalrous ways,.....as much as I do. Chivalry is obviously second nature to you,...so just be yourself and never try to change for anyone!.

Just wondering if you were offering beginner courses as I know a few men that I would love to send you way....lol......


All joking aside it really is a wonderful quality and I hope you will never try to change it,...as that is a quality that I myself look for in a man
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