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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?      Home login  
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 nightfly
Joined: 7/20/2004
Msg: 51
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?Page 3 of 20    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20)
Wow, 150 posts. To another perpetuated idiot idea (playing hard to get). Sure, it gets his attention. He notices that you're not interested, and moves on to another woman.
 brawnydog
Joined: 5/12/2006
Msg: 52
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/29/2006 2:26:52 PM
If I am ignoring someone; I want them to go away.
I figured it worked both ways.

moo
 Melodic Euphoria
Joined: 3/22/2005
Msg: 53
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/29/2006 2:33:11 PM
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?


EH? Is that the paradox of the day? Curious m.e wants to know


If I am ignoring someone; I want them to go away.


That's what I figures. But y'know, there are people who just don't get the hint (the types that chases you even harder when you try to brush them off). Maybe the original poster have a point here? *shrugs* Maybe I'm finally growing too old for the current generation...
 demgirl76
Joined: 10/12/2006
Msg: 54
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/29/2006 7:06:36 PM
I think, though, by "ignoring," the OP wasn't actually being literal. I think she meant "ignoring" in terms of not flirting back - acting like you're not interested - like you have better things to do. People actually give that sort of advice! Remember that book, "The Rules"? I never read it all the way through (it sounded dumb) but the attitude was sort of like, "Act like you don't need him or want him because men like to be the ones to pursue and it's not fun for them otherwise."

I could be WAY off about this alternate definition of "ignoring." But I know that for some people, the fear is appearing overly-eager and showing that we obviously like the person... just in case he or she doesn't like us back as much, or at all... So "ignoring" wouldn't be ignoring the PERSON so much, as ignoring the fact that they're flirting with you.

I'm not saying any of this stuff is a good idea - indeed, I think when people refer to "games" in the context of dating, that this is the sort of thing to which they are referring.
 nice_girls_finish_last
Joined: 7/8/2006
Msg: 55
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/29/2006 7:07:47 PM
ummmm

Has any one ever tried open communication and honesty?????


Sounds like high school to me......lets put on our flavoured lip gloss.....
 arri
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 56
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/29/2006 9:47:22 PM

i think i'm in love.................................!!!..........


I think he is ignoring you ...
 leesw
Joined: 7/4/2006
Msg: 57
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/30/2006 9:06:29 AM
Exactly. By ignoring him you annoy him and he'll go to a "warmer land."

Remember the golden rule...."Do unto others as you'd have them do unto you."

Take the old English out and think to yourself, "Would I want to be ignored? Or mistreated? Or sent messages that that person was way out of my league?"

No?

Then don't "do it unto others."

Guys like to have interest shown in them just like women. It's not a mystery.
 stoneside
Joined: 9/3/2004
Msg: 58
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/30/2006 12:50:07 PM
No, not this guy anyway. I'll assume you have no interest and move on.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 59
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/30/2006 1:04:02 PM

Has any one ever tried open communication and honesty?????


I personally like this idea the best but somehow or other a lot of guys didn't get the memo??

Ignoring him? He'll ignore back.

hitting on HIM? Some guys think it's cool, some are either terrified or appalled.

Failing the opportunity to use open communication and honesty, I think a gal would need to display a MILD interest, sort of an "Interesting, tell me more?" approach. At the same time she must also give the guy reason to believe that the effort of "tell me more" is not taking him down a deadend road, so to speak.

Appearing overly anxious, needy, or desperate is a turnoff to most healthy members of either gender. Appearing disinterested, cold, aloof and distant is ALSO a turnoff... where in the middle of those 2 extremes you chart your course depends on you and the person you are trying to "get the attention of", I guess.
Cindy O
 justmeinnc05
Joined: 8/12/2005
Msg: 60
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/30/2006 3:32:49 PM
I don't know how men feel about it, but if a man ignores me, I will quietly go away.

This site sometimes makes me feel like I am in middle school again!!!
 Fairwayman
Joined: 7/8/2006
Msg: 61
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Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 10/31/2006 12:58:14 PM
Ignoring someone you are interested in is rather juvenile and ridiculous. I TOTALLY agree with the lady above me.. This site is like being in middle school !!

I have met some VERY nice people as far as friendships, but some (one in particular) nasty people as well. I guess one of the disadvantages of a free site is that a lot of people that arent really serious about finding a special "fish" join and treat it like a joke. I know that for myself, if this site charged a membership fee based on what I have seen so far, I wouldnt pay, at least not until I knew that it would filter out some of the "game players".

Ya, if a woman ignores me, I tend to back off and move on... why bother trying to read someones mind??.. Most times its hard to distinguish between a person ignoring because of the pursuit, or doing so because they just arent interested, and don't have the courtesy to say so!!

My comments aren't meant to offend people that are on POF, especially those looking for REAL relationships and friendships!!

Happy Halloween!! (jaws theme)
 Mojo_LA
Joined: 12/15/2004
Msg: 63
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/2/2006 12:19:49 AM
I'm sorry, what was the question? I wasn't paying attention...
 Confuzzled4ever
Joined: 6/9/2005
Msg: 64
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/3/2006 8:03:41 AM
Scenario:

I ignore this man at work. He repeatedly asks for my number and asks me on dates I have told him many times that I cannot date him because workplace relationsips are against policy and I would lose my job. He says no one would need to know. So I now just ignore him. He will not stop pursuing me.

So ignoring DOES work. However. If you are playing head games or doing it just to appear to be hard to get it WILL NOT WORK. Men do realize rather quickly when they are being taken for a fool, or when they are being toyed with, afterall they are intelligent beings. If you are interested show it. Don't change your schedule for them, but do make time to answer a phone call every so often or return one whenever possible. If they truly like you they will fit themselves into your schedule, just be nice and leave them a few slots to occupy every so often...

I get accused of ignoring men all the time, when in fact I have no intentin of doing so. (with the exception of the one mentioned above) I just explain to them that I am a busy single mom and I barely talk to my best friends. They never stop calling me though, because they know I am not playing games. You have to tell the truth when they ask you questions. This does not mean divuldge all your plans to them when they ask why you can't go out with them on Saturday. But do tell them you already have plans.
 SimplyPeachy
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 65
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/3/2006 8:27:24 PM
If I leave my dishes in my sink ignored, what will happen?

1. I can't pull out a clean dish at ease. (can't turn an ignored man into datable without cleaning the situation up)
2. I just prolong needing to pay them mind. (why ignore when i know i'll be paying him mind later)
3. People think I am not tidy. (it's rude and stupid, if you like him)
4. Bugs. (something will enjoy licking up the leftovers)

Please refer to counseler regarding control issues. Your ignoring them, is to control the situation to your benefit. Very childish and not worthy of a loving relationship (please see my last 25 posts).
 Pink Rose Lady
Joined: 10/1/2006
Msg: 66
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/4/2006 9:22:47 PM
Relationships can be defined as 2 people relating to each other. It's just like going fishing, you can bait your hook and toss it out there, but if a big fish swims by but doesn't bite, you're still fishing, and he's just swimming on by - and ignoring you. He's not paying attention to you. See where this is going?
 tracester
Joined: 2/7/2005
Msg: 67
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Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/5/2006 11:07:45 PM
I don't understand why you'd want to treat someone you like, like you could CARE less. Isn't that called a MIND GAME???? Not healthy. If someone (male or female) only likes you because you IGNORE them, there is something WRONG with that situation!!! Just my humble little opinion on the subject.
 Frank from POF
Joined: 9/13/2006
Msg: 68
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/5/2006 11:11:36 PM
That's a good question. He can't take you for granted if you ignore him at least lol
 la_mom
Joined: 10/26/2006
Msg: 69
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/7/2006 11:13:57 AM
Oh goodness.....the "game plan" approach to dating. Do yourself a favor and just STOP. Any person that you may keep around (probably temporarily) due to manipulative tactics is only there for the excitement of the game and not because of who you are. The only basis for a real relationship with any substance at all is honesty.....but, if you're into the thrill of attempting to control ppl...keep it up...you're on the right track!
 ~LoriMac~
Joined: 3/12/2006
Msg: 70
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/7/2006 4:04:12 PM
***Ok I think the advice is ignore him to an extent***
It doesnt mean not to answer the phone when he calls or return mail...that's rude...what it means is if your not dating the guy and your just contacting him to keep a dialogue going that may be working against your goal. I know alot of women who contact the guy constantly...way more often than he does. That can get annoying to the guy. He's not the only person you can ask about virus protection for your comp...or where to get a new cell...or whatever.

For me i dont think about it....but everyonce in a while i will just not be the one to contact him...if he is intrested he will mail me. I'm certainly not ignoring him though.
 Pink Rose Lady
Joined: 10/1/2006
Msg: 72
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/30/2006 9:04:01 AM
Gee, if I don't put my car in gear, will it go anywhere? I don't think so...... but they told me it was an automatic.......

Does ignoring a guy get his attention? isn't that an oxymoron?
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 73
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Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 11/30/2006 9:11:39 AM
Thank you Leaf for stating the obvious.......

Secure people, both men and women, will give each other "the looks and vibes" in order to find a way to "connect" if interested.

If it is one way only, the "end result" is usually a "passed connection" and chance to meet someone that may be good in your life.

Just my opinion......
 Pragmatic
Joined: 11/24/2005
Msg: 74
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Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 12/1/2006 3:52:22 AM
As for me; If you ignor me I'll go away!
Simple!
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 75
Does ignoring a guy really get his attention?
Posted: 12/1/2006 9:52:33 AM
I think in the sense that if you show a man interest clear and direct and then move on and let him breathe and decide whether or not to take it from there....yes.

In the sense of being rude and totally not responding to a man who is interested is...well just rude, and most men will take that for a big red light.

The only ones that it works on to ignore from the start, are the "challenge hounds" that are into the chase only, or the overly egocentric men that will chase a woman who ignores them out of pure bewilderment that they don't respond as if they are a God. Now THAT I have seen. Of course it never goes anywhere....
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