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 Savanna
Joined: 3/23/2007
Msg: 22
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lolllPage 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
The first time my one ex ever said it to me... I flipped out. I was like "don't ever ****ing say that again!" I ran outta his house got in my car and didn't return his phone calls for 2 days... then I realized I loved him too... Oh how gay.
 abrethoffreshair
Joined: 2/10/2007
Msg: 23
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Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/24/2007 5:33:35 PM
There's only 3 guys in my life whom I truly believe really mean it, when they tell me they love me...that's my son & my 2 grandsons! YAYE!
 SimplyPeachy
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 24
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/24/2007 5:42:54 PM
Robfish,

I find it interesting how many equate I Love You to be needy and clingy. I wonder what are they looking for then? To be hated? Tolerated? Used?

I would certainly not run...no matter in what context someone applied the word. I would though, make certain I was not leading them on.



ps: when did 'loving' become a shunned weakness?
 SimplyPeachy
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 25
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/24/2007 5:44:42 PM
Wpg Chick 84:

That made me spit (will you marry me) !! Thank you for the laugh...

 robfish
Joined: 11/14/2006
Msg: 29
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/25/2007 5:17:15 AM
SimplyPeachy,

I was in no way implying that telling someone you love them is clingy needy behaviour, but there have been times where I have heard these words within weeks of being with someone and I was making light of the situation. I am very confident that I have a loveable personality from past experiences in relationships, I have been complimented about it constantly to the point where my head swells up so badly that I could float away.

Seriously though, there is some awkwardness associated with those words particularly when you don't feel the same way because its hard to find a response that won't offend or hurt the person. If someone said "i love you" to you, and you didn't feel the same way how would you respond without hurting their feelings? The words have never scared me away, what some people describe as needy, or clingy, or insecure behaviour is sweet to me. Call me every day, fill my inbox with messages, I love the attention.........hmmm maybe I am the needy clingy one!
 sookysoo
Joined: 3/27/2007
Msg: 31
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Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 2:28:44 AM
Guess what???? It happens on dry land too! I'm running as fast and hard that I can now from someone that keeps using that dreaded L--E word. Scarry as hell!!!!!!!!
 pebbles_2006
Joined: 7/19/2006
Msg: 33
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 10:10:12 AM
Well I was with a guy that I dated for 3 months & when he told me he loved me.... he got scared then took it right back because he thought it was too soon to tell me that. Then on top of that he wasnt being Honest with me Because he end up cheating on me after he Got me attached to him emotionally....Guys who ran away from expressing their feelings openly I think they are comfortable with themselves.

I am very open with showing affection...I know that there is nothing wrong with that.
If I like someone I express how i feel when they tell me how they feel I go with the flow...

 StarreGazer
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 36
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 2:59:12 PM


Msg: 1 -- then you hear the words"I love you" and you find yourself running for the hills?


Three times in my life the woman I was seeing said those words, and all three times it led to a LTR. Each time, the woman was voicing what I already felt, but I kept quiet about my feelings.

Every time I ever did start off by telling a woman I loved her, those words DID scare her away. I learned that my timing is never very good.
 cosmopolitan..
Joined: 12/30/2006
Msg: 37
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 2:59:54 PM
Robfish (msg 16) - distract them with a kiss!

You know the saying "too much familiarity too soon breeds contempt" ..... the earliest it's happened to me in the last several years was after several months, and it was delightful! And no, I wasn't running for the hills!
 StarreGazer
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 38
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 3:26:47 PM


Msg: 36 -- Nope, I don't run. I just tell them it's very sweet and I hope they understand I don't feel the same way. Then they run.


Back in the days before I learned that it is extremely unwise for me to be the first to utter those words, when I found the feelings were not reciprocated, I taught myself how to choke off those feelings and strangle them until they died. I would hibernate for a week or two, perhaps get drunk several times during the process, and when I finally finished, the feelings were dead or almost that way. Now I can do it almost like flicking a switch. I don't know whether it is really that easy or I just have a thickened barrier against such feelings.
 iluv2ßmom
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 39
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Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 4:02:34 PM
Oh My Gosh! I have!

About 6 or 7 years ago I was dating a man for about 3 months and he was great, the relationship was great and then he said those exact three words, "I Love You". I was off in a wirlwind! I went home, stewed about it and then drove down to his apartment, left the car running, ran in, broke it off and then headed home. At the time I was not looking for anything long term. I didn't want anyone to love me in THAT way... and I ran.

I believe now that how I broke it off was wrong. I would hope that I would do it differently if it were to happen again. As it is, I am not looking for long term AGAIN .. lol ... and I make it very known AND I keep myself at a distance to a certain degree. I don't want to shut out the man altogether because he may be Mr.Right for all I know.... for all I know the guy I dumped years ago was my Mr.Right ... oh the choices me make eh!
 robfish
Joined: 11/14/2006
Msg: 40
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 5:49:22 PM

Robfish (msg 16) - distract them with a kiss!


Thanks for the advice cosmo, I have been doing that in the past and it seems to work well if we cuddle afterwards but that leads me to my next problem......she said "i love you" after a few weeks, I responded with the kisses and cuddles and everything seemed fine. About a month later she proposes to me.....giving her a kiss and a cuddle and telling her she was sweet didn't work lol ....now what?? I know it seems that I am making light of this but its happened to me twice in the past (proposals) and both times caught me completely off guard because it was within a short period of time (a few months). I always assumed that in most cases it was the guy who pops the question.

In both cases I responded with "you're really sweet and we have a good time together but I am not ready for marriage" ........and THEN I proceeded to run for the hills! just kidding. So how do you say no without offending or hurting someone you care about?
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 43
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 10:17:36 PM
I have, but the rest of the sentence went like this...

.. so now I have to kill you.


 robfish
Joined: 11/14/2006
Msg: 44
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 10:26:46 PM
kindacute,

I don't want a buddy that I can just boink, I was in a relationship with the girls I mentioned and cared for them deeply. The thought of loving someone within a month or two is not that unreasonable to me, I don't put time limits on anything and hearing the 3 words does not scare me in any way. The proposals came as a surprise to me and I didn't know how to respond on both occasions which is probably why I am single right now, I did not dispose of either of them at a whim like you seem to think and I never once sent them mixed signals. These experiences I speak of happened years ago, and back then I was not ready for marriage even though I was in love with one of the girls that proposed. Does wanting to be sure and ready before taking the next step make me a person who wants a boink buddy?
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 45
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/26/2007 10:28:56 PM
Those three little words have been the demise of more than one nice situation in my past. Boy, when they are said too soon ~ I have the ability to turn invisible. Today, that is no longer an issue, thankfully. But I sooooo remember that horrific feeling of: "OMFG ~ I have got to vacate this vacinity immediately." Ewwww. Not good.
 robfish
Joined: 11/14/2006
Msg: 50
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 4/27/2007 6:37:01 PM
kindacute,

Now you are just making assumptions and jumping to your own conclusions without knowing all the facts. Yes, I did tell her that I loved her and I genuinely meant that, it was never an "i love you, but i'm not in love with you" thing because that statement itself is very pathetic! The proposal caught me off guard and I wasn't sure how to respond, I gave her a kiss and a cuddle and told her that I couldn't. I wasn't ready to make such a huge committment so soon into a relationship (under 2 months), so now according to you that makes me a bad person for encouraging a relationship-minded woman? I can still be committed in a relationship and I have been, never cheated on anyone in my entire life, the only thing I wasn't ready to commit to YET was a lifetime relationship also known as marriage.......I need more than a few months to sense if a girl is "the one". Anyway after that night things were never the same, slowly faded away because she was embarassed.......so if u want to get techincal she was the one who ran for the hills, not me . Thanks for the advice though.
 spitfire6844
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 54
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Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 1/7/2008 1:29:27 AM
They're just words. True love is expressed over many months or years. Love is expressed through genuine actions--not through some silver-tongued manipulator looking for an angle. A person saying "I love you" after a just a short time together either has an ulterior motive or just likes to hear themselves say it.

But no, I don't go running for the hills. I'll give the girl opportunities to show that love through genuine actions.
 Ftt_nyeh
Joined: 9/12/2009
Msg: 56
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 1/17/2010 5:25:06 PM
Yeh... actually that happened last week... after 3 weeks of cautiously seeing a girl. I didn't want to get too involved because I'll probably be moving soon. Then she said the words that will set her up for a world of hurt when I do leave. I haven't run for the proverbial hills because I guess I'm too polite for my own good. But it's incredibly awkward now.
 bornfree67
Joined: 1/1/2010
Msg: 57
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Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 1/17/2010 10:54:12 PM
haha! this is so hilarious! I'm that person who says the 3 little words to guys I dated briefly and I guess they ran for the hills. It is rather informative to read from the forum how people do handle the 3 little words!

I think a lot of people got mixed up with falling in love and loving that person. From my past experiences, I realised that a lot of people either do not have the capacity to receive or give true love. Maybe they had been so used to having a controlling and jealous partner that they do not know what the word "I love you" meant!

On hindsight, I'm referring to the love mentioned here:

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (New International Version)

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

As a compassionate and non judgemental person, I love people for who they are and accept them just the same. I don't need time to know a person as I'm rather intuitive so hence it doesn't take me long to utter these 3 little words. I'm not clingy nor needy at all. I guess when any guy run to the hills, it only show that they were not that serious about me and that certainly saves me from further heartaches.

 Ependa
Joined: 7/16/2009
Msg: 59
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 1/17/2010 11:15:41 PM
yep, more than once..If I'm not feeling it, I'm not faking it..does neither person any good.
 novoaus
Joined: 12/30/2009
Msg: 60
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Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 1/17/2010 11:21:36 PM
Personally I think the words 'your in love' is the greatest statement in the world

but only when she grabs your arse and says 'your in, love'
 mcalgary
Joined: 11/10/2009
Msg: 61
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Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 1/17/2010 11:36:26 PM
I think we run for the hills when we don't have the same feelings. Some people can fall in love too quickly for me but it might work with a different person that falls in love fast too. I would definantly run for the hills if it happened in the first month.
 catlover2
Joined: 1/24/2008
Msg: 64
Ever hear the words I love you and ran for the hills?
Posted: 1/18/2010 1:02:02 PM
Maybe its the though of having your world invaded by a person when your not ready to hear the 3 words. I have ran way before those words were said. At a certain age people need a good friend more than a lover, or a wife- husband.
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