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Show ALL Forums  > Poems And Quotes  > The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon      Home login  
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 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1926
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon Page 78 of 80    (40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80)
Briz, gonna try to stick around, lol! And tanks, Julz!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pain

They ask endlessly.
How much? From one to ten.
Ten, worst ever.

If you've known ten then
nothing on their scale computes
You must be mute

Most of a lifetime ago,
watching my father turn blue with pain
refuse help

The old question:
bearing pain well equals virtue?
And why?

In the waiting room
hoping for help
Children running and laughing

Hours drag by
The witness leaves
Fear rises

But fear is not pain.
Is it?

Terror will not kill you.
Will it?

No subtle questions here.



jjl
18 October 2011
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1927
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 10/27/2011 9:42:11 AM
You

The door buzzes, bangs back
wheeled through
the heavy steel doors
to help at last

How could that not bring you back?
How many times we played that game.
How many hours in bland beige rooms
waiting for those doors to open
waiting for that fifteen minutes
waiting for something like information
waiting for a decision
waiting

Finding back ways in,
sitting quietly, holding
your hand, praying
or something like it

And when the rules
don't apply
No visiting hours
just go on in
And would you like us
to call the Chaplain?

And the cold
Until at four in the dark
some sweet unseen angel
drapes a warm blanket around
my shoulders, your fingers
turning black with cold
between mine

Sometimes during the long
sleepless nights
I felt you, gently
curl up around me
offer me your presence
touch
love


jjl
18 October 2011
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1928
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 10/31/2011 5:19:01 PM
Untethered at last
Not one thing they can think
to push into either arm, wrist

I keep the needles, just in case,
Dangling like a bracelet
jangle bangle
but dance away from the bed
Close the bathroom door

Carefully explore:
my uprightness
my balance
my gait

Barefooted, hit the hall
Stroll softly to the end
and watch the old lady in the window
head wreathed in stars
No one I've ever known
now no way to deny
she's been there all along

No ready for a polka yet
I do a bounce and a quick
small soft shoe shuffle holding onto
the end of the bed.

And clean the room,
and sort my clothes
and drink the smuggled Mountain Dew.
Pack my going away bag.

Smug. No way around it:
Just plain smug.




jjl
19 October 2011
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1929
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/1/2011 4:13:31 PM
The Gift


Late morning,
promises kept,
the establishment
allows a bath
Brings towels
and soap

The needles
all pulled out

Door closed
And sitting
(wisely)
The hot water
runs and runs
as fingers seek and peel
the hot black snaps
no longer hooked to
the heart monitor
And snaps from earlier
investigations
Three sets in all

Bubbles
heat
steam
warmth
freedom
beauty
joy
All you ever wanted.

Dry my hair
which glows like a fizzy white halo,
don my jeans and pink sweater
(I might be human after all)
put on my lemongrass sandals
And when they allow me gone
they let me walk to the door
And wave goodbye

Leaving me only how to find
this new life
the one they gave me back
which doesn't much resemble
the one I had before


jjl
19 October 2011
 andover1111
Joined: 12/2/2009
Msg: 1930
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/2/2011 3:29:29 AM
just a thank-you
for allowing us to walk
a bit of your journey
hope you don't mind the stalk
as always,
your words ring true
seeing the same old
through eyes renewed
crystallizing
rediscovery
wishing you swift
full recovery
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1931
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/2/2011 2:30:37 PM
Andy, Welcome! And thank you!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Home

Staggering, tipsy, frail.
Watch the floor, which may
rise up to meet you.

Or you may trip
on a shadow.
Or dream.

Slow. Go slow. Think.
Plan.

Hold on to things,
don't attempt the big spans.
Be patient.

World glossy, metallic, transparent.

Need to find the magic
again. The hunger.

Negotiation as a way.
Of life?



jjl
19 October 2011
 foffeefifo
Joined: 11/1/2010
Msg: 1932
The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/2/2011 5:17:38 PM
oh mz toodsday, so upset to see you've been slogging a rough road. take it slow.

if i came home
would i find
the keys
the dreams
the routines
that past
those lives
and who?

and when i did?
who was there
on the porch
on the divan
in the kitchen
by the fire
but the ashes
of who i was
now risen
now learning
how to fly again
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1933
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/5/2011 1:10:55 AM
Not to worry, Foffela, I'll make it through this one fine. Thanks for the concern, though ♥
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Fear. Friend. Come.

Let us see what must be done.
See if it can be born,
and if not,
what then

No use to weep and wail
that the way's too hard
It is, and nothing more

Find solace where it can be found to hand:
Sound of leaves cartwheeling in the wind
Rain on sky windows
A little warmth when needed
A little flavor on the tongue
Will have to do

Make space, mark time:
there are still those who need you




jjl
20 October 2011
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1934
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/6/2011 9:49:44 PM
There would be a space then
where we meet, that neither of us owns
I'll give you my part,

And look for you,
again,
just over the crest
or perhaps around the bend

Standing in the deep green
dappled and invisible
and always present


jjl
20 October 2011
 ~Gitane~
Joined: 1/10/2010
Msg: 1935
The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/9/2011 5:13:49 PM
^^^^ and everywhere you go... there you are! Love it Woobs
 hummingbirddancing
Joined: 6/27/2009
Msg: 1936
The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/11/2011 10:03:38 AM
the finest things to read here...:) Woobs! thank you!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1937
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/11/2011 11:06:11 AM
L. lol! Here's the last of the hospital poems. . . .
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Absent from my own life for some time

I knew, somewhat. Things not quite
matching. Stitches dropped. Vague sense
that something needed doing, but what that
something was escaped like mist.

Never quite enough energy to get entirely
through a day, in tact.

Waves building for years, rising,
and finally like those deep blue in a Japanese print
breaking white against cliff and sky

A matter of simple mineral
When the deficit is too large
the electrons don't fire clear
across the gap, but fall
and you follow

This is what starvation is:
phenomenal, not imaginary

I'm not back yet
but am beginning
to delineate where I've been
skry scri scry?



jjl
21 October 2011
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1938
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/11/2011 11:07:31 AM
Missed you hiding there, Jules! Thank you! xox
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1939
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/18/2011 12:50:54 PM
Progress, of sort, lol! I "failed" the manometry test (the Lower Esophageal Sphincter was too tightly closed to allow the probe down. . . .)(The probe has a 3mm head.)(That's smaller than a pea.) They were going to prescribe meds to open it up. But the only meds they were *willing* to prescribe (Calcium Channel Blockers), I'm allergic to. In any event, the manometry revealed that the main body of the esophagus is NOT contracting (consistent with Achalasia), and since this is the third test where my condition is "consistent with Achalasia", they're willing, to grudgingly accept that's what I have. Problem is: *they* don't treat for it. I have to be referred to our big teaching hospital: UVA in Charlottesville. Which is a *good* place to have virtually *anything* done. It takes TWO WEEKS to simply set up the referral. So I'm guessing this is going to stretch out into the new year. . . . There goes Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners. . . .And Ah Well --> at least it is moving forward.

Funny when you get close to starvation how long delays *feel*. . . .
 Brizo
Joined: 2/19/2006
Msg: 1940
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/22/2011 8:35:44 PM
I hope you get in there soon...*hugs*

the poems are great. Love when people write about real stuff.
 cesska
Joined: 11/7/2011
Msg: 1941
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/28/2011 7:31:04 PM
PRAYING for you
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1942
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 11/28/2011 8:07:49 PM
Tanks, Briz! And *welcome* cesska! Prayers are so welcome!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1943
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 12/9/2011 10:44:11 AM
Good news! (Of a sort, lol!) I have an appointment with a surgeon next Tuesday (the thirteenth, and 13 has always been my lucky number!). After almost two months of stonewalling by the GIs (I think I'd go mad married to a GI). Perhaps not-so-good: he wants a stress test for my heart (also scheduled for that day). I'm gathering if I fail the stress test, there won't be surgery. At least not by him.

At any rate, I'm happy for the nonce. Who can ask for more?
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1944
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 12/15/2011 9:01:45 PM
Have a surgery date!! December 27, 2011!!

WOOT!
 andover1111
Joined: 12/2/2009
Msg: 1945
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 12/16/2011 2:54:49 AM
ah, a turning point
to start the coming new year
on a road to renewed energies
body aligning with spirit
let it roll

(wishing you best luck and continued strength)
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1946
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 12/21/2011 1:54:26 PM
Thanks, andie! All good wishes welcome.

Think this is coming just in time. My legs, especially the left have been swollen since the calcium channel blocker they gave me in the hospital. Finally got to working on the water retention (which is dicey because of the screwed up potassium); if one takes potassium sparing diuretics, one risks getting TOO much, which is very dangerous; on regular (non-potassium sparing) one risks depletion, which is ALSO very dangerous. So taking non-sparing, and BIG doses of potassium along with it. And as the water comes off, my *real* weight is being revealed: I was 122 this morning, which is two pounds more than when I was admitted to the hospital and down 13 from when I was discharged. I 'spect I'll be down in the teens somewhere by Tuesday. . . . Haven't weighed this little since I was 12. Added: never any way to be sure how much of any med is actually getting through. . . . I know some is, cause I can be spitting up vitamin B at the same time my urine has already turned florescent, lol!

On the plus side, it's soooooooooooo nice to have legs that don't weigh ten pounds, and need to be lifted (by hand) to get up stairs, or onto a clutch pedal.

I'm *sure* there's poetry in this somewhere. Just haven't located it yet. . . .
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1947
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 12/24/2011 5:35:19 PM
Two days. And yes I'm counting.
 Brizo
Joined: 2/19/2006
Msg: 1948
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 12/29/2011 12:15:38 AM
How tall are you Woobs? Maybe you can get in the 130s...that's my goal weight. I've had ten or less pounds usually to lose to get there but think I can?
 apurfectmeow
Joined: 11/19/2011
Msg: 1949
The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 12/29/2011 12:57:36 AM
Wishing you a speedy recovery and much happiness for the New Year
filled with much deserved peace prosperity and health

(and everything you secretly wish for~)
~xlr8ingmargo
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 1950
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The Great Virtue Sitting Parlor and Greasy Spoon
Posted: 12/30/2011 2:39:07 PM
Biz ~~ I'm 5'5" ~~ And weighed 134 when they discharged me yesterday. Again, way more dehydrated than I thought. But manohman I am swallowing SO well right now! Not hungry, but what goes down STAYS down, which has not been true for six months (actually, years. . . . ). Wunnderfooooooooooool!

Thanks, Margo: it appears to have all the earmarks of a lovely year to come. I can feel energy literally flooding back in!

The news seems to be: it's working, and it didn't hurt too much. Will worry about the copays around Valentine's Day. Or later.

AND: my potassium is right at 4. Which is very very good indeed.
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