Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > Never married & no kids      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 m68
Joined: 2/12/2005
Msg: 451
view profile
History
Never married & no kidsPage 19 of 24    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24)
Sometimes life gets in the way and didn't think there was an "age" when you had to have kids and be married in order for people not to think you're wierd lol
 boterkoek73
Joined: 12/18/2010
Msg: 452
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/26/2011 10:27:13 AM
Assumptions are the mother of all screw ups!! Don`t assume. You don`t know this person enough, or at all! Would you rather he or she be divorced with 4 kids? It can`t hurt to ask. And if he or she is an honest, agreeable person then he or she may appreciated your interest and tell you what you want to know!
 Sleek_Stallion
Joined: 8/2/2009
Msg: 453
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/26/2011 9:23:33 PM

Many of them have surrogate dogs or cats of which they have assigned way to much value.


lol. so true, so true,
Their "like" thier baies when actually they need some
 Sleek_Stallion
Joined: 8/2/2009
Msg: 454
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/26/2011 9:36:13 PM

Sometimes life gets in the way and didn't think there was an "age" when you had to have kids and be married in order for people not to think you're wierd lol .


There is wake up. Which society are you from? lol

I guess its human nature..
 Sleek_Stallion
Joined: 8/2/2009
Msg: 455
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/26/2011 9:45:55 PM
writercookmt on 6/21/2011 118 PM
Subject: Never married & no kids
Message: I would simply conclude he (or in my case she) had other priorities they wished to attend to.
I'm 33 never married and no kids - most of the people I know that were married or have kids, they have had a hell of an expensive and troublesome ride just to get where I am. - single.
Everyone is entitled to their opinion - but remember that assumptions are what robs us of something good in life more than protects us from something bad.


Ok why do we in US think marraige = troules? Maybe that's why people are not getting married untill they're sure it will work out(like me). I truthfully heard sooo many bad marraige stories. I rememer many times, after their horrific stories, people even advised me "you better be absolutely prepaired before you get married, if not then face the consequences of what could happen.. fire and brimstone, divorse and domestic violence..." S

Hence, currently, Im not married and "not yet ready for it." It may have gone to my head.

Isn't there some nice marraige stories.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 456
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/27/2011 9:32:57 AM
^^^^^
Isn't that a good thing -- to recognize the troubles? By default, there is a strong, intangible wind blowing everyone in the direction to get married for the sake of being married, whether they're with someone or not (the latter being the questionable pressure).

We don't live in a world where you NEED to get married & have kids anymore, and older generations want to see their bloodlines continue, which is why that persistence still exists. Also, if they're not getting married -- OMG, they have needs so they must be a total tramp or male slut!

If one is single, they ARE not ready for it. If one is just dating someone they ARE not ready for it. It's about TWO people being ready for it, and that being based on their environment & situation in life AND most importantly, the relationship they have -- not to be married for the sake of being married, or feeling like they're "not complete".

Being married by itself is not a solution to anything.
 Consigliori
Joined: 1/7/2008
Msg: 457
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/28/2011 8:30:40 AM

If one is single, they ARE not ready for it. If one is just dating someone they ARE not ready for it. It's about TWO people being ready for it, and that being based on their environment & situation in life AND most importantly, the relationship they have -- not to be married for the sake of being married, or feeling like they're "not complete".


I’m happily married, we have four children and would have more if I weren’t so d*mn old already. I often find myself defending the institution of marriage from the burned and sour, but I think that this poster has a healthy approach. Too many marry when they aren’t ready. Too few take it seriously enough. And there is too much pressure on people to jump into it.
 AprilTaurus01
Joined: 6/25/2011
Msg: 458
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/28/2011 11:14:09 AM
Not everyone wants kids or kids of their own. I personally dont question it weather he is over 30 or 40 etc. Everyone has a story to tell best to just ask him and bring it into a conversation IMO
 GC_Hayez
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 459
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/28/2011 4:51:33 PM
Well I can say this for myself. I'm 31, I've never been married, and I have no kids. And I'll give you the reason wht I don't have kids. And that's because it hasn't happened for me yet. If/when it does, I'll take on that responsibility head on! But, if I end up not having kids at all, then it just wasn't meant to be. However, I really do hope to have kids of my own one day.
 cycling100
Joined: 4/3/2010
Msg: 460
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/28/2011 8:04:15 PM
Girls could care less if a guy has been responsible with no kids and never married. They will still go for some unreliable douche bag because they think they can fix them. Girls like projects. A man who is responsible and has been into his 30's is nit a big enough challenge.
 Here_In_Florida
Joined: 4/4/2011
Msg: 461
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/28/2011 8:16:09 PM
There's a woman that I know, actually met her on a dating site. She is single, never married, no kids, mid-40, attractive and in great shape. Upon speaking with her, she had mentioned why she was still single. She didn't want to have children either.

She said she had been close to getting married or had been proposed to at least or the men she had dated were hinting around at marriage, but she had discovered that, well, they wanted to spend more time with her and she might have to sacrifice some of her social time with her friends and perhaps spend less time in her weekend long hobby.

She did admit to be probably having been selfish. She claimed the last two guys she dated were "needy" but that was only from HER persepctive. I'm not sure, but TWO guys being needy , were sounding more normal actually.

Wanting to spend more time with her mate and perhaps giving up time away from your friends and hobbies were kind of par for the course, because I had quite a few friends after they started getting serious or even married, I hardly spent any time with the one guy I used to hang out with. Trying to get them to hang out with you was like pulling teeth, so I decided to pursue time with more single friends. LOL

Of course, we stayed in touch by phone or email on occasion, visit during a B-day party but that's about it, no weekly outings with the buds like it used to be on a routine basis.

But she wasn't willing to give up that.

She has a sister that has been married, and had even made her into a great aunt. Even told me that she had such a great family life, that she really has no excuse for being as single as long as she had. She had been so into her independence, that was not willing to even compromise on hardly any of it.

What's kind of sad is, she lives in a rather small community where most people her age are married with children. You would figure her desire to get married would be there. She could've gotten married rather easily, but passed up on the proposals. SHe just wasn't willing to give up what she enjoyed as a single person.
 Spring_weather
Joined: 5/20/2011
Msg: 462
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/29/2011 11:19:35 AM
I have never been married and I do not have any children, I like that I have the freedom to just take off if I can afford to.. Being single suits me very fine!
 GC_Hayez
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 463
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/29/2011 9:57:25 PM
I couldn't agree with you more.
 PicturUs
Joined: 1/26/2010
Msg: 464
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 6/29/2011 11:16:30 PM
Hey I wish we could just say "like" like on facebook. You are so right about this bud.
 EMunchy2010
Joined: 8/23/2010
Msg: 465
Never married & no kids
Posted: 7/2/2011 9:19:19 AM

You see a profile of interest & he or she is 30something & up, as you continue 2 read a lil further, you notice that he or she has never been married & has 0 kids, do you question why or just immediately make assumptions?


I would assume that's why women continue to complain they'll never find a good man. It's true some men or women may play coy or lie just to be slick and trick their date when later it may bite them in the @$$.

Always ask questions but never "assume". If you want to play it safe, questions and precaution never hurts and should be the right start for sometime beneficial or unfortunately disappointing


I'm still single, never married and no kids, what's wrong with that? If girls want to assume the worse about me, let them... I'm not loosing. I know many people and many people know me. My excuse is I wasn't ever ready for commitment and life is either harder or a lot smoother when your in a relationship.



 seasghost22
Joined: 2/13/2009
Msg: 466
Never married & no kids
Posted: 7/3/2011 2:57:30 PM
I prefer people who have never been married and have no children.
those are the only people I take seriously.
 NotPerfect67
Joined: 12/9/2010
Msg: 467
Never married & no kids
Posted: 7/3/2011 4:37:11 PM
I would be one of those "odd" ones. Never married because if I would've married the one I talked it with, I'd be a statistic now! It's interesting what you learn about someone as time goes on and it took 5 years to learn the "truth" about her. Getting married anymore isn't what it used to be and it's too easy to get out of. And no kids because I never got married! So, if that makes someone think I'm a reject and can't commit, then so be it. They've just shown me the red flag I need to see to run for the hills!
 Damienevil
Joined: 2/22/2008
Msg: 468
Never married & no kids
Posted: 12/20/2011 9:23:34 PM
I make no assumptions. I have no kids and I have never been Married. I will never get married either and I know quite a few women who do not want to have kids.
 dmzvisitor
Joined: 3/25/2011
Msg: 469
Never married & no kids
Posted: 12/21/2011 4:39:27 PM

Posted By: Here_In_Florida on 6/28/2011 1009 PM
Subject: Never married & no kids

What's kind of sad is, she lives in a rather small community where most people her age are married with children. You would figure her desire to get married would be there. She could've gotten married rather easily, but passed up on the proposals. SHe just wasn't willing to give up what she enjoyed as a single person.


Maybe I'm missing something, but why is this the least bit sad?
 yellowsparkle
Joined: 7/10/2009
Msg: 470
Never married & no kids
Posted: 12/22/2011 12:54:55 AM
30, never married, no kids and amazing! I look for the same in a mate
 Want_You_2010
Joined: 8/31/2009
Msg: 471
Never married & no kids
Posted: 1/8/2012 5:47:30 AM
I have been experiencing alot of rejection by women my age since i turned 40 because I have never been married and have no kids. It boggles my mind because they feel that having an ex-wife and/or kids along with child support, possible drama in my life as appealing.
Many say I wouldn't understand if she had to break a date because her child is sick. That assumption really annoys me, she doesn't know me and already has an assumption made up.
I have no problem if a woman has children or doesn't. Been married or hasn't. I would hope she would see the positive and not the negative in me not being married and no kids. Why search for a negative in that?
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 472
Never married & no kids
Posted: 1/8/2012 9:25:58 AM
^^^People fear the unknown. You are not like everyone else since you haven't jumped on the bandwagon. It is worse for women. Men tell me they would have nothing to talk to me about since I cannot commesurate with them about problem children and an ex. Try looking for a single teacher who has not been married. They know how to be frugal, are patient, are usually kind hearted and perceptive.
 lobo65
Joined: 6/9/2009
Msg: 473
view profile
History
Never married & no kids
Posted: 1/8/2012 6:36:52 PM
I make no assumptions because I am 46, never married, and have no kids myself. I'm sure I've been judged many times for it by online daters though. Many women think we are the ones who are strange for some reason.
 want2rox
Joined: 1/10/2010
Msg: 474
Never married & no kids
Posted: 1/9/2012 8:23:17 PM
You know! Here lately I met alot of guys 40's and up, who never been married and no kids. I do wonder why about them. I know not every guy is the same but guys don't see what women see, I mean your not alone with them to hear what we hear and see. (you gotta be there)
I met one who still lived at home. Nice guy but his father had protected him to long and never made a move without looking to him.
I met one who was quite, shy and lived alone. He said" he thought he liked being a hermit. I agreed with him. He didn't like sharing, he was already set in his ways . He didn't believe a relationship should be met half way by each person, it should be his way. He had pleasure himself for so long, he could get it up with a girl.(Not gay either).

I lost I don't know. I thought it was a good thing at first, the not being married and all but now Im not sure. No bagage a good thing but also no experience in other areas in life, like if you have a child and they don't. You can't just drop everything and be fancy free.
 Want_You_2010
Joined: 8/31/2009
Msg: 475
Never married & no kids
Posted: 1/9/2012 9:18:48 PM
I refuse to settle just so I am married and have kids with that person, then divorce and promote single parenthood. Sorry I experienced that as a child and refuse to do what my father did.
I have had long term relationships and been single for long periods of time in between them. I work a steady job, am always attending sports events, concerts, festivals, go on trips. But the whole deal breaker is "Oh you have never been married and/or have no kids." Blows my mind how that is such a terrible thing. So a handful of guys are boring, etc, does not mean they represent all the guys with no kids and never married.
Women hate it when we men paint them with the same brush, yet we get it from women as well on this topic.
Try looking at the qualities and positives that they are, instead of searching for the negatives. You will end up passing up a really great guy.
Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > Never married & no kids