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Joined: 5/9/2007
Msg: 88
What is your take on mail order brides?Page 8 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Dear sddude:

WHAT A GREAT STORY about your father and I am glad you found happiness with your wife - at least for a while.

Your post says it all about so called Mail Order Brides - it is such a positive wholesome story.

Good luck in finding another wife - you deserve it.

Many people on this thread are not paying attention that in the old west in the mid 1800's give or take 30-50 years - Mail Order Brides from Back East were very common and helped settle the Western U.S. and most people considered it a very good thing.

For women who think MOB is a bad idea then they should be more out reaching and accepting of the men on POF. Keeping men at arms length as so many POF women do - only causes men to look for other solutions.

Joined: 5/9/2007
Msg: 89
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 5/31/2007 8:11:14 AM
Dear anatomynurse

Without taking a scolding attitude at all - I believe your words are an over reaction. A few posts by men on this thread deserve your response - but most do not.

I was married once - she was a very good woman. I had a 10 year live in and she was a very good woman. I'd just like to find another woman of their caliber - but it takes a receptive mind to do that and I find little reception on POF.

I personally don't have too many complaints about American women - except lack of attention. Men want to rank in a fairly high priority with their wife/girlfriend - but all too often we find we are way down the list. For me - attention, affection, respect, goes a long way. When men can't find these things at home (USA) he just may look elsewhere.

I suspect that many American men feel as I do -- just pay attention to me - interact with me - and that should preclude nagging and writing 'honey do' lists.

It is probably true - some men may not deserve what I describe - but I think I do and so do many other men.

There are too many walls between men and women in the U.S. I just ask women to open some doors through those walls - consider a bit of risk.

Joined: 9/9/2005
Msg: 90
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 6/6/2007 8:47:51 PM

I know a man a few years ago who did this - married a lady from the Phillipines. It was basically a "mail order" situation.

According to him, the reason he did it was because he wanted someone who "acts like a wife" in his words. I was shocked by that statement!
He explained he had met too many women here that don't cook, clean, and spend too much time watching tv .....

WOW I had no idea any man thought like that ... at least to THAT extreme. He is the only person I have heard of anyone who went to that extreme to get married so I don't know if that is the reason other people do it or not.

and no, if you are wondering, they are not still together. She got her citizenship, took his money, and ran off LOL

So much for the perfect wife

This post scares me. Why is it that a man that wants someone as a wife scares you? I had a wife that didn't cook, clean, and spent most of her time watching television. It was a pathetic excuse for a marriage, and she was a pathetic excuse for a woman. She eventually moved on to bigger and better things... like using children to sell drugs at the local elementary school.

If I ever get married again, which is doubtful at this point, I want a wife that is willing to share the household responsibilities, cook, clean and is interested in making my house our home. Anything less is unacceptable. The trade off though is this.... I'll help her be what she wants to be. Care for her. Protect her (this is my choice and your right reguardless if you accept it or not). And be a Husband to her.

So whiel I would not take a mail order bride, I do have to say that if the culture produced women that are not selfish, arrogant and pompous, then I would like to sign up myself, but too many are getting "westernized" and worthless.
Joined: 9/9/2005
Msg: 91
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 6/6/2007 8:52:30 PM

I dont think its got anything to do with economic power to be honest. I think its to do with making do. I really believe that men are more driven by sex than women. Same reason there arnt a great deal of women that go to male prostitutes I think. It just doesnt happen. Too much testosterone and too much cash -thats the problem! lol

Yes, I agree. Men are driven by sex more than women. I can also tell you that of all of the men that I have ever spoken to that have looked into a mail order bride, their reason is far simpler. They are tired of women treating them like trash, saying that they are sex driven, and trampling on thier hearts to get to their wallets.

Sometimes stop talking at a local restaurant and just listen to the women talking at their tables. It is absolutely horrifiying. I can assure you that no matter HOW pretty she is, if she is cracked and broken and so selfish that she is a miserable burden, then I most assuredly don't want her.
Joined: 9/9/2005
Msg: 92
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 6/6/2007 8:59:49 PM

If men want to purchase ladies from oversea's then so be it. Its up to them, they are trying to find something that makes them happy thats all and if they have to pay for a woman to marry them because they are so illequiped to get one for free - let them! lol

The question you really have to ask is this. What is it about american women that is so bad that they go out of the country to find a wife. I researched this once for a while. Almost every one of them I met said about the same thing. AMerican women are selfish, self centered, think of themselves above everyone else, and have no skills to bring into the marriage. One guy even went as far as to say that his wife was more useful to and respectful of her boss at work than she was of him. I think he actually saind something like this... her bos tells her to jump and she jumps. He asks her to do something and the first thing out of her mouth is "Who do you think you are? My boss?"

They are divorced now. She blames him.
Joined: 9/9/2005
Msg: 94
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 6/6/2007 9:13:03 PM
There are Mail Order Brides (Matchmaking services) even now. It is not illegal and many a woman that was sick of the dating game has given herself to one of the services to stop the cycle. When you go into a marriage with a commitment that no matter what (except abuse) you are going to tough it out, then you get a good marriage. ALso, most of these "serives" amke sure that there is a structure in the household that the woman is going into. Without a structure, there is no stability. With no stability, there is no peace. Without peace, the marriage will not last.
Joined: 4/7/2007
Msg: 107
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 7/15/2007 10:12:36 PM
Think its stupid...if you have to pay for a bride your pretty desperate is what I think.
Joined: 4/7/2007
Msg: 108
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 7/15/2007 11:03:40 PM
Your an ass gideon.....just your whole view point of American women is pathetic its no wonder your single....also do you really expect us too believe the story of your wife using children too sell drugs ?yeah you mine as well go get yourself a mail order bride I dont think no normal thinking American women's going too want the like's of you.
Joined: 11/19/2005
Msg: 109
view profile
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 7/17/2007 11:42:28 AM
I'll bet the shipping charges are expensive.
Joined: 8/7/2005
Msg: 117
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 8/9/2007 5:29:50 AM
Haha. From what I understand, those relationships don't tend to be very stable. Most of the time, the brides are looking to get out of their country, and marriage is the quickest way to do so.
And anyway, there's no possible way of *really* knowing what kind of person you're about to jump into a marriage with. :P
The whole mail-order-bride-concept seems rather iffy to me.
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 118
view profile
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 8/9/2007 11:18:38 AM
fordboy...this is only an observation from my point of view.....

Most men I have seen resort to a mail order bride.....would have difficulty obtaining/romancing an American woman. They are either lacking in many ways or want a woman go grateful to them she is extremely subservient to them. Many times, the woman will only stay in the marriage long enough to get her final papers.....then she has her independence and is gone. It's really more of a business arrangement on the womens part.
Joined: 9/4/2007
Msg: 121
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 10/3/2007 12:35:39 PM
Meh, It's almost like a escort service. You can find lotsof hot foreign women out there and the guys dont care if the women take off as long as they hae funand dont be stupid make thewm sign a prenuptual These women are not stupid andim sure they do their homework on customs and laws here so they know they can get hapf of the mans earnings without lifting a finger. Yes the hot women here are concewited and have way too much attitude and need too much attention. Hell they porobably get off on that then sex but the foreign women like someone else mentioned are trapped ina cold counytry with controlling lifestyles and the chance to come to a country that is free should make them want to give us what we want since were freeing I mean c'mon people its fun for the guy and freedom for the women and yes they are prety much sellin their bodies for freedom no matter how you look at it. Im sure the women will have something to say about this
Joined: 9/11/2007
Msg: 122
view profile
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 10/30/2007 2:27:00 PM
Wow, what a massive stereotype on the American Male! LMO !!!!!!
Joined: 1/24/2008
Msg: 126
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 3/22/2008 2:10:06 PM
I think it's also potentially dangerous for the women.

A foreign woman alone in a strange country with no friends, family, maybe even no english could easily fall victim to an abusive man.

Her passport could be taken from her for one, there are a lot of things that could go wrong for the woman.

It has happened before, I don't know the % rate of it happening (probably very small) but don't forget the dangers involved for the women that decide to come here.

There's also some risk of women getting forced into human trafficking/prostitution thinking they are going to their "new life" ...but that's probably a whole new topic.

Unfortunately, women meeting their husbands through brokers frequently have little opportunity to get to know their prospective spouses or assess their potential for violence. They also have little knowledge of their rights as victims of domestic violence in our country, even if they are not yet citizens or permanent residents. And tragically, it is becoming apparent that there is a growing epidemic of domestic abuse among couples who meet via international marriage brokers. Immigrant and women's advocacy groups across the country report seeing an increase in the number of these wives seeking to escape a physically abusive husband they met through an IMB. And in several cases, the abuse has progressed to murder.

from here...

Joined: 5/10/2007
Msg: 127
view profile
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 3/22/2008 2:35:20 PM
The postman would have a helluva job getting a mail order bride through the letter box ....
Joined: 11/8/2005
Msg: 132
view profile
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 4/2/2008 4:07:47 PM
Ladies, you can find your man at:
Joined: 7/25/2007
Msg: 138
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 7/11/2008 10:01:35 PM
Stepford Husband, stellar idea, where do I place the order. lol
Joined: 11/3/2008
Msg: 141
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 12/8/2008 7:16:45 AM
RFLMFAO, the very idea that anyone wouldn't know that mail order brides are for fools who are such losers they can't get a date with a woman in their own country. Also need to be stupid enough to think she will stay with you, and in many cases let you live, once she has soaked you for enough cash. Idiots!
Joined: 7/23/2006
Msg: 142
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 12/8/2008 7:31:07 AM

However ladies if you take into account how it seems to work here on POF its no wonder men are leaving in droves to find wives elswhere who have a much more family oriented lifestyle. Women here look for men who are younger than they are and that leaves men no choice but to go somewhere else.

Damn and I thought I was bitter. lol
Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 143
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 12/9/2008 12:19:47 PM
Peronally I know 3 men that have done this all for different reasons and none of them are because they want a submissive wife. One has a heart condition and he is afraid that if he dies there will be no one to take care of his brother that is very sick and cannot work. Another gentleman which I have known since I was a child is very quiet and NOT a ladies man. After his first marriage fell apart mostly because his wife was domaneering he found it was really hard to break out of his shell to meet women his age. He has been married for 18 years and now lives with his wife in the country and town in which she grew up and has her family living nearby. The 3rd fellow was on vacation and met his wife in the Ukraine. It was not mail order I guess since he spent a fair amount of time there before he met her. This is his second marriage and is very much an equal relationship where descions are discussed by both of them.

This is not what most women think it is. It is NOT about wanting a woman that is subservient to the man. Men from Canada that I have met offer a lot to these women from other counties and are considered a real catch. We have a tendancy to be liberal compared to other countries which allows a lot of freedoms to these women as well as being supportive to them and their faimilies back home. This can be lost on women from Canada or the US as they EXPECT these things as the norm, they are not in other countries. So to be appreciated by these women for what YOU as North American women see as inherent rights can and does make us as men feel important and giving. We are not animals poaching on poor women trying to get what we can from them, there is a mutual exchange that goes on as in any marriage and these are no different.
Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 145
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 12/9/2008 9:29:12 PM
Modest Mouse I am not sure why you are so against the idea of marrying someone from back home as it seems as though this would provide some cohesive footing for both of you. This year 2 friends of mine got married to women from arranged marriages. They are muslim, one born in Jordan and he is very excited about it and the other born in Canada that is doing it becasue of family responsibilites and pressure. Both women are quite beautiful and educated as well as being roughly the same age.

Will they work out? Maybe, we will have to wait and see but at least the cultural aspect of these relationships is grounded and the families are supportive of the marriages which can be of great help.
Joined: 5/2/2006
Msg: 148
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 2/22/2009 2:03:21 AM
I think I want one of these as soon as possible.

I have been under the impression that this is the era of true equality so this being true, why aren't there the male version of these brides for us American women?

Sincerely now, the individual who realizes that this market is wide open is going to be one rich son of a gun. We professional ladies would also appreciate the opportunity to have an all purpose "he male studly type" to do our bidding, and all we need to get one of these is hand over the bucks in our pocketbooks and share our willingness to pass on a green card?

Well, I can't speak for the rest of the ladies but I'm sure we're just as fed up with the b i t c h ing and moaning of the American men we have to choose from as they are. Now where do I sign up? (big grin)

Joined: 8/12/2009
Msg: 149
What is your take on mail order brides?
Posted: 2/1/2010 9:00:25 AM
Wouldn't bother me, the idea at least. I have never looked into it, but have often heard of it. I personally would only be interested in doing it from one of the south American countries though, not the former Eastern Bloc. For some reason (no offense intended) I don't trust the organizations operating out of there as much as I might trust one from south America. Now I'm not saying you couldn't get ripped off or whatever from there as well, but to me a lot of these sites that seem to advertise for specifically Russian, or Ukrainian, or Polish, or whatever, women .... they seem like they're trying to scam somehow. Almost like dealing with Nigerians.

Also I know there's a lot of trafficking in females and other related unsavory activities which occur out of the former Eastern Bloc (some of the countries more so than others). Something that would be in my mind is, to what extent is this woman doing this of her own free will? Is she working with , whether via coercion or not, any sort of organized crime which runs the "bride sales" and therefore gets the money (and then eventually wants more from you as well)? etc etc. I'm sure there are some (hopefully most) businesses from there (buy-a-bride businesses) that are on the up-and-up. But I just have a problem trusting them. It is probably just a personal bias or whatever, but.... just IMO.
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