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 cashfan
Joined: 9/26/2006
Msg: 79
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Dating a SmokerPage 2 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
In one capacity or another,may it be for one of many reasons, health, wealth,social standing ,etc, the adage I always told my kids is so true-----"Only Losers Smoke "
 michaelk03
Joined: 11/20/2006
Msg: 82
Smokers are THEE WORST
Posted: 6/17/2007 2:59:40 PM
You did the RIGHT thing by not dating this guy again. I only dated a smoker ONCE in my life.....a mistake that will NEVERRRR happen again. Your problem is COMPOUNDED if his behavior makes you want to start smoking again. Why jeopardize YOUR health for a guy who might eventually dump you? Smoker's are strange people because they can rationalize their smoking behavior.....same as an alcoholic. Go find a decent guy with no "unhealthy" habits......They are out there.
 Happilyeveretc.
Joined: 5/20/2007
Msg: 83
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/17/2007 3:16:44 PM
i'm with you, i don't drink, but like to have a cigarette whenever, and i don't want someone who wants to change me, i don't want to change anyone else either. what u see is what u get. (P.S, Alchohol kills many many more people than cigarettes in more ways than one, and also breaks up so many families)
 Happilyeveretc.
Joined: 5/20/2007
Msg: 86
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/17/2007 3:25:12 PM
I agree, i would not date a non smoker, because i would always be self conscious, and guilty, and could not be myself. And i don't think anyone wants to date someone who is not their real self
 cashfan
Joined: 9/26/2006
Msg: 88
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Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/17/2007 5:43:59 PM
Smoking is very expensive, especially in some countries, so smokers often have less money for more sensible purchases , it is a habit that is extremely harmful to one's health (assuming that one accepts the medical findings that lung cancer is considered detrimental to living ?), and I consider that here in Canada, smokers are certainly looked down upon , and treated with some disdain. Wealth--Health--Social Standing. I shall continue to tell all my Grandkids ---" ONLY LOSERS SMOKE "-they lose in so many ways.
 capturedsunshine
Joined: 6/14/2007
Msg: 91
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/18/2007 7:28:18 AM
I have never smoked in my life and I prefer not to date a smoker. However, I did meet this one guy who did smoke and he was really cool about it. He did not smoke in his house, car, or at the table when dining out. If more guys were like this, it would probably be easier to date a smoker. However, most are not. I just prefer my own clothes, hair, and personal items not smell like a smoke factory.
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 93
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Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/18/2007 8:46:51 AM
Thank you, DareU2, for your post. So nice to have people who can see the truth.

And thanks, SweetSpuds, on your understanding.
" People that judge don't matter and people that don't judge do matter."
This is what I believe. But in our PC-world, they seem to ignore this, and judge you on some standards that governments decide.

Most of you don't know this, but I have a problem with second-hand smoke. But it is not from cigarettes, or from cigars.

I HAVE A HEALTH PROBLEM WITH CAR SMOKE.

Yes, that's right. I have a reaction to car exhaust fumes. If I walk down the road, and I smell car fumes, I start to puke. As a kid, I could go no more than a mile before wanting to chuck my guts. Rarely have a problem on a bus, because I sit on the top deck. But if I get a lift with someone, and we get stuck in traffic, I need to have the window open, then closed, then open, and I feel like I want to throw up.

But no-one is banning car fumes in public places, like streets. It's not like I can avoid them, like not going into bars or restaurants. There aren't no-fume streets, or streets that only allow cars with catalytic converters. So I'm forced to put up with it.

But you aren't. Oh, no. Can't allow little Johnny to be exposed to second-hand smoke from a cigarette. Ever think what he's breathing in, when he smells car fumes?

What about the chemicals in food? Every soft drink seems to have Sodium Benzoate, which combines with Vitamin C in the blood to make benzene, a highly lethal poison.

I'm all for giving up. But I know why I smoke, and I'd need counselling for that, and where am I going to get it? There are AA meetings in my area, but no NA meetings. Maybe I should pretend to be an alcoholic, just to get help? You get more help being on drugs or alcohol, than smoking.

Anyway, I never understood why they didn't just make separate smoking rooms. When I worked at a perfume factory, the canteen had a sealed smoking room with good ventilation, even in the winter. We'd go and eat out lunches in the main room, and smoke in the smoking room. What's wrong with that?

I recently found out that the government are about to fine everyone who chucks their butts on the ground an £80 fine. That's US $160. But there are no ashtrays to be found. What do they expect smokers to do, carry their butts with them, in their pockets? Then they REALLY would smell like an ashtray.

I always found that most smokers would be considerate of non-smokers, like not smoking near small children. But the consideration is not reciprocated. Mothers with small children will take their children into the smoking sections, because they are positioned more near a window. Smoking sections are normally upstairs when we all know that smoke is heavier than air, and goes down, not up.

We are all told how harmful smoking is for your health, yet cigarette manufacturers are not required to list all of the chemicals they use to make them, and several are extremely injurious to your health, like Cyanide, and bleach.

If you really want to stop smokers smoking, just get the government to enforce that cigarette and tobacco manufacturers to publish their full list of ingredients. That alone would make most smokers give up.

The real truth is that the governments do NOT want people to give up smoking. They simply are trying to get more non-smokers (75% of the population) to go out and spend their money in bars and clubs. Great. So instead of a small portion of the women being hit on and used for sex, they want it to be a large portion of the population, namely those women who will NOT go to such places because of second-hand smoke. I wonder if that has anything to do with the fact that most women who have been to bars and clubs no longer want to go, unless they want only sex. Also, it's a great way of sneaking in a littering fine that is really hard to avoid.

More revenue and fresh meat, people. That's what I think this is all about.

Just to throw something else, into the mix, I came across this study on the internet:

Despite the potential influence of sexual abuse in childhood and adulthood on smoking among women, few studies have examined these variables. In this exploratory study, 296 women completed an anonymous survey. Results revealed that women who were sexually abused as children were 3.8 times more likely than their nonabused counterparts to be current smokers and were 2.1 times more likely to have initiated smoking before the age of 14. In all analyses, sexual abuse was a better predictor of smoking than were status variables. These preliminary findings highlight sexual abuse in childhood as a gender-specific stressor that increases girls and women's risk for smoking. Hence, sexual abuse is worthy of further investigation as well as of inclusion in new gender-tailored smoking prevention and cessation programs.


I think I'll get off my soapbox, now. It's getting a bit tiring.
 JoleneS51
Joined: 5/10/2007
Msg: 97
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/18/2007 3:17:35 PM
I, for one, am looking forward to the day when smoking is completely banned once and for all. If the tobacoo lobby was not so powerful it would be banned already. Our government is so quick to pull a product off of the shelves if it is implicated in just a few deaths a year. Smoking, despite contributing to countless deaths each year, has not been. It truly makes you certain that our government does not have our best interests at heart. Rather they are living large on the largess of big tobacoo.

LMAO! What a joke! I will be glad when the gov. treats the drinkers the same way they do the smokers, along with pedifiles, abusers, adulterers, tax evaders, parents who dont pay their child support, jerks, liars, cheats.....and you name it!!!! Any GOOD doctor will tell you, you either have the cancer gene or you dont.
Now as far as lung diseases..thats another story & is not only caused by cigarette smoke, but carcigens released into our air....It's called POLLUTION!!!!!!!! Now are you willing to pay a big portion of the taxes "US" smokers pay that goes to research, road work & many other things? If so....go ahead,I would gladly see my smokes go back down & stop paying extremely high prices for them..........LOL!
 JoleneS51
Joined: 5/10/2007
Msg: 98
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/18/2007 3:23:40 PM
How bout a law against being cynical?
 cashfan
Joined: 9/26/2006
Msg: 102
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History
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/18/2007 8:28:56 PM
Why cannot some people just grasp the obvious-smoking is harmful to EVERYBODY's health--just STOP !!!!!
In the UK, smoking patients are now legally moved DOWN the waiting list for their operations--and quite rightly so , I believe this is also being tried in Ontario.
 JoleneS51
Joined: 5/10/2007
Msg: 107
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/18/2007 11:41:41 PM
Losing a parent at the young age of 54? Wasnt it their choice to smoke or not? We all come in this world knowing we're gonna die, in one way or another. I got off taking nerve pills & started smoking..I enjoy it alot better, not woozy or slurring words looking like a drunk.
Is it fair my 25 yr old son died may 31st 2007 on a motorcycle? NO...it's not & as much as I told him to get rid of it, he chose to ride it knowing the dangers. Now I have 2 of his 4 babies to raise & miss the hell out of him & will till the day I die.
All I could do was advise him of what could happen......not make his choices.
Many people die from cancer & never smoked or been around it...so I guess we should all stop breathing?
 JoleneS51
Joined: 5/10/2007
Msg: 111
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/19/2007 12:45:37 PM
You need to move on, as my gran babies are very well taken care of wether I am here or not. I was making a statement as to choices that my son made, I voiced my opinion on that & he still chose to go it his way. We all have choices as George Jones sings about & the great thing about it....is we're all different & think different. If your a smoker, drinker, or whatever...who are we to judge? If things dont suit you....move the hell on & leave the prudish attitude at home or with your prudish friends. I will live life my way & on my own terms, dont care what anyone thinks.
 JoleneS51
Joined: 5/10/2007
Msg: 113
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/20/2007 5:19:30 AM
I say good luck to finding your mate being smoker or non-smoker. This topic could go on & on ...it goes back to what your comfortable with or can handle. I date smokers & non_smokers but being considerate around those who dont smoke. Yes, it is a bad vice.....but for right now it is only vice I have. It has been like a nerve pill & especially during this time after losing my son tragically. The ones who smoke I think would understand that.
Best to everyone on this thread.
 ufo nut
Joined: 12/23/2005
Msg: 114
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/28/2007 6:47:47 PM
Hi Bill just read your comments regarding smoking. I am kind of a middle of the roader regarding liberal and so called consevative. But that doesn't have much to do with the desision to smoke. Most people get into to it because they are young and their 'cool' friends all do it. I don't have a problem with people who smoke because they really like it, what is sad is the ones who are only forty or fifty and have already had bypass surgury and want to quit real bad but they just can't. This includes some of my best friends. One of them has been diagnosed with lung cancer. He can't quit either . My cousin has a little oxygen bottle he totes around. He just turned fifty. I guess anyone is entitled to die anyway they want but that doesn't appeal much to me. I guess I am just lucky, I have tried a little bit of everything just to see what the excitment was all about but I was always able to put it down before it hurt me. Yes the vitamins can help a lot but the lungs can only take so much smoke of any kind. I don't want to get real attached to a lady just to watch her end that way so I will stay away from the smokers and take my chances with my motorcycle. Maybe if I die on it it will be quick. By the way I am 60 and I have been riding for forty six years and I still breath good and can run a mile if I have to. It would be a pretty slow run as I don't work out or anything just work hard and watch what I eat. I respect your right to smoke and think the government should stay the hell out of it. have a great day, Bill
 ufo nut
Joined: 12/23/2005
Msg: 115
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/28/2007 6:50:32 PM
Hon, you and me could get along. See my other post. Bill
 vhdc
Joined: 7/18/2006
Msg: 117
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/29/2007 5:57:39 AM
Smoker? No thanks can't stand the smell or taste of them (the smoker).
 sapheyz
Joined: 6/14/2007
Msg: 119
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 6/29/2007 6:59:17 AM
I think what they meant is it tastes like an ashtray smell lol.
 cal2425
Joined: 3/31/2006
Msg: 128
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 7/3/2007 5:11:39 AM
No you are not crazy for not wanting to date a smoker,nor should you change your mind either. Smoking is a habit which is offensive to non-smokers. When I go out I like to shower, put on nice clothes, makeup and nice perfume. However, I feel that when you are in the presence of a smoker, all the time you took to present yourself in a positive manner, is ruined by the smell of smoke. Smoking is a tough addiction to kick. Good for you that you have achieved that goal Good luck you will find what you are looking for.
 RealHeartJohn
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 130
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 7/3/2007 7:00:52 AM
Hi,
Having quit smoking for 10 yrs after smoking for 30 all i can say is this. Boy I'm glad I don't anymore. Things taste better, I can smell things I couldn't before and most of all I have broken the chains of having to schedule everything I did around having a smoke. So OP stay off the smokes its a better life.
Oh yea I have dated smokers, some I could put up with and others i couldn't. Just like non smokers I guess. But I'll always try to convince the people I like to quit.
 donaldrocker
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 131
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 7/3/2007 7:14:37 AM
I agree. Although I don't smoke, my dad was in the hospital, had to quit, then quit when he got home, his wife kept smoking. He started again, then when his wife got sick, she quit, and he kept smoking. I'm waiting for her to start again, but maybe she won't. Also, when I date smokers they offer me one about every hour and I think "hmmmm" maybe I should try this. But, I never do because I hear nothing but bad stories from other couples where one smokes and the other one doesn't....also, my mom's husband is dying from esophagus cancer, which the Dr. says came from smoking those "damn viceroys" that he smoked all his life a couple years ago. Geez! it sounds like I'm preaching, but I do feel strongly about this!
 JoleneS51
Joined: 5/10/2007
Msg: 132
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 7/9/2007 4:04:39 PM
Ilove, I love it, I LOVE IT!!! To all those non-smoking self righteous folks who like to make smokers feel like garbage....tonight on CBS news Katie was telling of the new study on smokers vs non-smokers. New studies show that non smokers stand a bigger chance of heart disease over smokers..
Watch the news & then talk about all us bad smokers. Some of us may end up dieing from cancer, but you non-smokers may die from heart attack worrying bout kissing a smoker.....LMAO!
It goes to show that there is good, bad & ugly in almost anything we drink, eat, smoke, or do anymore.
 GuitarGuy_
Joined: 3/15/2007
Msg: 135
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 7/9/2007 6:10:35 PM
I've dated smokers. I'm not crazy about people smoking but if it's the right person it's not a dealbreaker. As long as they are courteous about it around me. Don't smoke in my house or vehicles. If we are outside, say at a fire please try to sit so the smoke isn't blowing in my face.

Again, courtesy goes a long way.
 MetalVixxn
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 137
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History
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 7/9/2007 10:13:16 PM
I hate dating smokers. When they run out of smokes, they always bum from me!!!
 pineypete
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 140
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/9/2007 9:12:53 AM
I gave them up in 1988. Ever since then I have dated lite smokers, heavy smokers (4 packs a day) and non smokers. I had made a promise to myself that I would give them up if they ever went over a dollar a pack. I kept that promise to myself. Haven't smoked a cigarette since. I also saw the handwriting on the wall involving smoking laws. I was truly an addict when I smoked!
On dating and living with a smoker everything involving smoking becomes a issue. In a restaurant she always wanted to sit in the smoking section. At events we barely spent any time together in our seats or at the table because she would be outside smoking. We even took a much more expensive flight one time so she would spend less time in the air and away from the demon weed! I'm not talking a few dollars here either! The house smelled like a bar and it took months after our breakup up for the smell to vacate. I tried so hard to tolerate it but felt I wasn't even being met half way. All I had asked is that cigarette smoking only take place on the first floor. The bedrooms upstairs were to be off limits. Even this could not happen and all my clothes and linens eventually smelled also. I've been to many homes where smoking does not take place inside period! Even smokers homes! I thought I was being reasonable with the downstairs only rule.
She was truly addicted to tobacco. Any attempts to give them up only went for a few days with a marginal amount of cheating. I'm so glad that I was able to kick this and stop smoking years ago. I'm convinced that today's smokers are slaves to tobacco as much as junkie is to heroin. With all that is known now it is amazing how many still smoke. The ladder just keeps getting pulled up on non-smokers also. Eventually it will be the law of the land that smoking will only take place within the realms of your own home and probably at $10 or more dollars a pack.
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