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Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 141
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Dating a SmokerPage 3 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
I don't smoke, and kissing smokers do taste like ashtrays, but they only taste like ashtrays shortly after having a smoke. My g/f is a smoker who has this annoying urge to kiss me after she has a smoke, but I refuse to kiss her until her breath is less revolting.
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 147
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Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 9:43:08 AM
Maybe you shouldn't have "occasional smoker" in your profile....most smokers that see "occasional" think that you're a smoker but in a bit of denial.
Joined: 5/2/2005
Msg: 148
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Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 9:55:39 AM

Why? Because smokers are cool. The smoking section in a restaurant is always the most fun. Non smoking bars are boring. On some level non smokers are jealous.... lol

Yea... keep telling yourself that. Perhaps you're not the smart man you claim to believe. I've never smoked, never will and believe me, on no level am I jealous of smokers. And I will not date a woman who smokes.
Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 150
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 10:11:27 AM
fiestyangelisback ,,,,,, This is the most intelligent answer to this post i have read.. Good for you! Bravo fiesty.... As to the OP and some others here. What can i say except Forrest Gump says ,,, SHALLOW IS AS SHALLOW DOES... If you really like someone then you will help them to QUIT SMOKING by keeping them very busy in bed and extending love and understanding to them and givving them a reason to quit smoking.
Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 152
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 10:15:01 AM
I'm sorry TWISTED_ KITTEN. .. I missed your WONDERFUL RESPONCE...
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 155
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Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 11:01:42 AM
If you don't like the smell, don't date a smoker. Pretty simple. Do what you enjoy. If you smoke once in awhile, okay by me. Just enjoy your life and choose to be around people that make you happy.
Joined: 2/5/2007
Msg: 157
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 11:25:52 AM
There are three reasons I will not date a smoker:
(1) My father died of emphysema as a result of smoking. For the last two years of his life, he walked around attached to an oxygen tank. I held his hand as he died, gasping for air. Going through that once was once too much.
(2) I have asthma.
(3) Kissing a smoker tastes NASTY, and if I can't enjoy kissing, well....need I say more ?!!
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 160
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Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 12:32:59 PM
I am a smoker, Im with a smoker and a chewer.
I will probably die from smoking unless I get hit
by a car or die by an accident first.
My chances of dying from smoking as opposed to getting
in my Jeep and driving down the street are 50/50.
Im going to die and probably either way it will not be pretty
as death never is, at least the ones I have witnessed.
This is a debate that cannot be won on either side. We can all match
wits and insults and facts and studies and personal experience until
the cows come home.
The bottom line is - your given a choice and all choices should be respected.

Joined: 5/25/2005
Msg: 162
view profile
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 1:52:56 PM
Nope, u NOT all all crazy....since when you hang with a smoker --no matter how nice, sexy, etc. he is----it gets to be 'when in Rome, do as the Romans' esp. with a cold beer or other drink in hand...BUT next thing you know, you are doing it more and more, then buying a pack, then another pack, and so on thing you know, you are AGAIN a regular smoker...and suffering the physical and mental agony of nicotine withdrawl if/when you decide to stop them or him....ALONG with the accompanying 5-10lbs that usually goes with stopping....
 London Lass 59
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 164
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/13/2007 8:10:05 PM
There have been so many heated threads on this subject, although from what I have seen, the non-smokers out number the smokers in those forums and for very good reasons. I have dated smokers in the past, but it was not a pleasant experience, I felt like I was kissing an old ashtray, not to mention the smell of smoke on my hair and on my clothes!!! Would I date a smoker again? heck no!!!
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 171
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/14/2007 10:23:22 AM
I'll stop smoking when they start putting high taxes on all the unhealthy items that cause obesity...twinkies, potato chips, soda, etc., rather than only on cigarettes, because the high cost of healthcare here is due in great part to obesity, not only cigarette smoking. If obesity is a disease, and alcohol addiction is a disease, then why isn't cigarette addiction considered a disease? Because most people know that it's a *choice*, just as drinking and overeating are. At least with smoking no one can kill another person because they were 'intoxicated' or 'under the influence' while behind the wheel of a car; and we can't smoke on planes anymore but we have to put up with scrunched accomodation because of the 400lb person in the seat next to us who's taking up way more than their share of the seating...yet there are many of us who are very considerate smokers - even in our own homes and cars. Frankly, I'd take a smoker anyday over someone who had alcohol, eating, gambling, or anger issues. JMO.
 London Lass 59
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 172
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/14/2007 8:21:37 PM
I have to agree with you boats, smokers really just don't get it. They will continue to use every excuse in the book to try and justify their nasty habit. They could care less about the health risks to themselves and others around them that have to breathe in those toxic fumes!

They need a fix and they need it now!!
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 175
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/17/2007 11:27:16 AM
Msg 216...everyone has habits or quirks that someone won't like...but it's how the person with the habits or quirks handles them that makes a difference to me. There are inconsiderate smokers and very considerate ones, just as there are considerate and inconsiderate:

- drinkers (sloppy, loud drunks vs those who don't get that way);

- perfume/cologne wearers (those that wear an appropriate amount and those that pour on so much you wonder if they're covering up not taking a shower)...and considering many of us are allergic to many perfumes/colognes, I'd say it's more dangerous for us than 2nd hand cigarette smoke is to many who aren't allergic to cigarette smoke, since our allergic reactions to these chemicals can be immediately life-threatening.

- eaters - overly obese people raise the cost of health care for every consumer; and when they raise kids who follow in their footstpes the cycle continues;

- speeders - not only do they rause insurance rates, they put other people's lives at risk by their reckless, negligent, and inconsiderate driving.

I could go on, but you get the point. I don't smoke around non-smokers in my car, in my house, or anywhere else, unless they say it doesn't bother them - and even then most times I don't do it because I don't want to with them there...if they don't smoke they shouldn't have to breathe in mine. I always sit in non-smoking areas when I'm out with people who are non-smokers. It's my choice to pollute my lungs with cigarette smoke...unlike the choice many companies make for us by polluting the air with their fumes from vehicles and manufacturing plants. When they start regulating other bad habits, then maybe it won't bother me...but the self-righteous attitude of some non-smokers against smoklers - and not against anything else that ruins one's health - is frankly a bit ridiculous, IMO.

Msg 218 - we don't have to 'justify' anything to anyone but ourselves...we considerate smokers, who don't smoke around non-smokers, are only 'hurting' ourselves. But, please, tell me how you justify polluting other people's lungs by driving your car every day? Or taking the bus or a taxi? And, while this doesn't appear to fit you personally, maybe since you're in the profession, you can explain why the majority of those in the health care business look to be in fairly bad health themselves? Not only have I seen many of them smoking and eating junk food, but they have high blood pressure, diabeties, heart problems and more because so many of them are out of shape and obese. Shouldn't they know better than anyone how bad things are for one's health and do all they can to avoide them so they're setting a good example?
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 176
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/17/2007 11:58:35 AM

They could care less about the health risks to themselves and others around them that have to breathe in those toxic fumes!

Please google "the myth of second-hand smoke" -- might not do your attitude any good, but at least it'll make you an honest woman.

 London Lass 59
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 179
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/17/2007 3:41:19 PM
Thank you to those posters who recognise second hand smoke as being detrimental to your health. It is certainly no myth, but very real. People can develope lung cancer from constantly inhaling second hand smoke, as optimistically says, it is alot more dangerous than many of you think.
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 181
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/18/2007 10:30:19 AM

People can develope lung cancer from constantly inhaling second hand smoke, as optimistically says, it is alot more dangerous than many of you think.

Sure, some can...just as some non-smokers who have never been around smokers can also develop lung cancer; just as those working in dry cleaning plants - smokers and non-smokers - can develop lung cancer from the Perkethelene; just as other can develop it from other chemicals in manufacturing, exhaust, etc. NO ONE knows 100% what causes lung cancer; just that some things *might* contribute to it for some people. Cancer is a mutation of our own cells; anyone's cells can mutate at some time in their life, but no one knows what causes a particular person's cells to mutate and not another's - even when they've both been exposed to the same factors. Having several people I know die from cancer, including lung cancer - smokers and non-smokers alike - I've learned a good amount about it.

Read up on things:

Also, if a smoker can get better after quitting, then how can second hand smoke cause *worse* damage to a non-smoker, as they're not getting anywhere near what the smoker is, the smoker is *also* getting sexond-hand smoke, and filters don't cut down much of anything for the smoker. The smoker does more to themself than to others, IMO...especially the considerate smoker who doesn't do it around others. I'm also interested to know why there's such a bias against cigarette, cigar and pipe smoke, and *nothing* against the emmissions from manufacturing plants, vehicles, lawn care sprayers, etc. These also have chemicals that may be carcinogenic and affect many more people than smoke why aren't people trying to clean that up or ban those things?
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 187
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/19/2007 7:29:52 AM
I smoke but I am not a heavy smoker. I dont smoke around people that are in my company. I respect others that dont choose to smoke and have dated smokers and non smokers without any problems. I dont smoke while dining or immediately before or after. It is a very personal choice for a person to smoke and it is very addicting. I can say I have never been pulled over by the PoPo for smoking nor have I ever been pulled over for being behind the wheel for drinking alcohol either. Which is more dangerous, smoking, drugs, or alcohol? Its still a personal preference either way.
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 193
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/19/2007 9:53:33 AM

One foriegn study stating the "safeness" of second hand smoke does not negate all of the other studies showing it as dangerous. Secondly, all of the rhetoric you quote in your post is not from the study but rather from a pro-smoking website so it lacks in credibility.

There have been other studies done also; and most of the anti-tobacco stuff is from an anti-smoking website, so why would one from a 'pro-choice' website be viewed any differently? BTW, it's actually no a pro-smoking site; I see it more as a freedom-of-choice site. I'm not saying smoking is healthy; it's not...just as breathing in other forms of smoke and chemicals isn't healthy either...But the rabid irrationality of some people on the subject isn't justified, IMO.

Please stick to the topic. We are not talking about cars. We are talking about smoking.

There is a difference between smoking and car driving and it is a huge difference. In our society, smoking is optional, driving a car is not. A car is needed by 95% of the people in our country in order to exist. Smoking is needed by exactly 0% of the population to exist. So, if you are going to make comparisons make sure they are equivilent and not apples to oranges. Thank you.

We're talking smoking...and also other health risks that are just as dangerous to some as smoking can be to some. Also, a car isn't needed...people can live closer to where they work, bike in, walk, etc. A car is a convenience; not a necessity. BTW, did you stop drinking coffee when they said it was bad for people? Or did you just drink less - in moderation? Funny how things they've said for years were bad for one - coffee, wine, birth control pills - have now been found to have health *benefits*. Birth control pills went from causing breast cancer to *preventing* it...and all without changing their formulation. Anyone who believes *any* study 100% correct is someone who doesn't use common sense and their own mind to think, IMO.

No matter how you spin it there is no way to logically, scientifically or rationally defend your choice to smoke. The proof is there that it is hazardous to your health and those around you. No way to defend this selfish choice you have made. You can try all you want, bring in arguements about all of the other hazardous things in this world. But, when it comes to smoking there is no way to defend your decision to smoke.

Then you could also say there's also no way to 'logically, scientifically or rationally defend your choice to' drink socially. More and more people do stupid things when they drink, including getting behind the wheel of a car because 'they've only had a few' and 'they're fine'. There's proof this is hazardous to other people's health...actually to their lives. If smoking in my own home and car, when no non-smokers are present, is selfish, then IMo you need to look up the defininition of the word...I call that considerate behavior, not selfish...and none of us have to 'defend' our decision to smoke.

If you want more information, read the following:
Secondhand Smoke Study Raises Ire
Study Shows No Association Between Passive Smoke and Health Risks; Others Criticize Research,2933,26109,00.html
Second-Hand Smokescreens
Thirty-three studies on secondhand smoke had been completed by 1993. More than 80 percent of the studies reported no association between secondhand smoke and lung cancer, including the largest of the studies. The EPA reviewed 31 studies - inexplicably omitting two studies reporting no association between secondhand smoke and lung cancer - and estimated secondhand smoke caused 3,000 lung cancer deaths annually.
Environmental tobacco smoke and tobacco related mortality in a prospective study of Californians, 1960-98
Conclusions The results do not support a causal
relation between environmental tobacco smoke and
tobacco related mortality, although they do not rule
out a small effect. The association between exposure
to environmental tobacco smoke and coronary heart
disease and lung cancer may be considerably weaker
than generally believed.
Joined: 3/19/2007
Msg: 194
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/19/2007 10:07:17 AM
Hey optimistically talking on the phone kills people allso lets take every thing in to consideration not just one fault, look at the damage done by drunk drivers. if ever one want to be complety safe they wont leave thier home corase they can be bad allso.
 London Lass 59
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 199
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/19/2007 5:50:49 PM
Excellent post chelsea, I think you have just hit the nail on the head! I take care of these patients too. It's a real shame that many of these patients don't realise that they have made a big mistake until it is too late. There are too many smokers saying "if only".......

We do what we have to do, we care for these sick people, we try and educate them as best we can, but we are so very often treated with hostility for giving health advice. This and other smoking posts prove the point.........
 London Lass 59
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 201
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/19/2007 8:30:37 PM
Optimistically, I also lost my mom from smoking related heart disease, she was 52. She was also a nurse, she should have known better, but she got hooked on cigarettes at the tender age of 12. I was robbed of my mom at a very young age, I was 28 when she died. She never got to see her only grandson and 2 great grand children born, or see her 3 grandaughters grow up into beautiful women. I still miss her very much, her death could and should have been prevented.......

I am with you 100% on this, it's a shame that we have to constantly stand our ground and try and fight a never ending battle.......
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 205
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:05:44 AM
Personally, though I don't smoke, I like the smell of it (especially freshly lit cigarettes). Of course, I would never go out of my way to access smoke given the health risks. Not all non-smokers hate smokers.
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 209
Dating a Smoker
Posted: 9/20/2007 7:40:42 AM
Msgs 252 and 254...dont' think people aren't grateful when you all help to educate them...But like anything else, it's how that 'education' is given that makes a difference. Some people come off sounding sanctimonious, superior, and rude while others come off as concerned, informative, and caring. How one gets that education makes a big difference in how they act when receiving it. And I'm sure those dying of lung cancer who caught it from smoking, industrial carcinogens, and other ways are sorry they got it...but how does someone who never smoked then admit to making any kind of 'mistake'? So I wouldn't call it a 'mistake' under an circumstances. It's a choice and there are consequences to all choices.

I took care of my father who had lung cancer, so I know what that's like...and I didn't smoke around him at all...even though he didn't quit himself...the doctors said it wouldn't make any difference at that point, so why bother quitting. He already had tumors in his head, which completely went away with radiation; he never got sick with radiation or chemo; and he lived 8 months longer than they thought he would. And they said his cancer was more likely related to the dry cleaning chemicals he had been around all his life. Considering his father had smoked from age 9 and died at 91 of old age, and no other smoker in his family has anything...but many people he worked with in dry cleaning - smokers and non-smokers both - developed the same form of lung cancer, and it's shown that Perk is carcinogenic, draw your own conclusions. Smoking didn't help, but it also wasn't the only thing that may have caused my father's cancer.

Msg 256...I don't have children...and I can't live my life to please others. You cave-tube, not exactly a safer sport...what if you got severaly hurt or killed doing that? What about those who love and care about you? We all do things that may not be healthy; it's called living life as we choose to. BTW, I wasn't 'forced' to take my father in; besides the fact he had lived with me for the previous 12 years before he got sick, he's my is there for, and takes care of, family. As I don't have kids of my own, I ensure that I'll be taken care of in the event something happens to me by saving money for it.

Msg 257...While I sympathize with your loss, your Mother had to make up her own mind on how to live her life. While there are numerous addictive substances, those who truly want to quit any of them can do so, with or without outside help...The most important factor in quitting an addictaion is the person themself *wanting* to quit. There's been health warnings on cigarettes for as long as I can remember; anyone who blames someone or something else for their own choice to smoke is not taking personal responsibility for their own choices. As for you, your frankly nasty comments about 'laughing in people's faces' makes you sound bitter and negative, which is harmful to your health and to those around you. I hope you can forgive your Mother someday and get rid of the negativity so you can have a healthier and happier life.

Msg 261...great post.
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