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 meditationstation
Joined: 5/14/2007
Msg: 208
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????Page 3 of 40    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40)
Lose 30 lbs for your health and the longevity of your life and buy yourself a diamond.. u dont need a ring and a piece of pare or a mans approval. **** THAT
 WNYdancer65
Joined: 4/15/2007
Msg: 217
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He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/6/2007 7:51:14 AM
Listen to yourselves ladies. That's exactly why you are all still single. It's the same with smokers. They say they will quit. But DON"T. They say they will loose weight but DON"T. And the religion deal. She's over 50 and catholic. Give me a break. If tht's all that stopping two people form being happy on earth then she better start re-evaluating her priorities.
 kindapicky
Joined: 8/28/2005
Msg: 227
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/6/2007 9:25:49 AM
It's interesting to read the first 10 or 15 posts.. Most females want a man 5' 8" or taller. What is the difference in a man wanting a slender woman???
Most of you are bitc**** about this but, we but can control our weight, unless there is a medical problem..
He has a religious choice already, asking anyone the change religions is VERY difficult.
 ladybugsluck9
Joined: 8/10/2006
Msg: 228
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/6/2007 9:26:04 AM
OMG If he can't love her enough for the way she is on the outside & not for the person she is on the inside I don't care how desparately she wants a ring & to be married!! HE DOES NOT deserve Her!! She can do much better!! Besides a size 16 is not at all overweight!! That man has more issues than her weight & they will come out after they get married!!
 Latina1056
Joined: 10/7/2006
Msg: 241
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He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/6/2007 10:41:11 AM
My 2 cents She should tell him baby you take me and my 30 lbs screw him if he wants her to lose weight take me and my meat... I think this is insulting to have to lose weight for some jackass.
Love me as I am and how I look or take a hike...
I bet he has a nice beer belly and can;t even get it up as much as he should.. The nerve....
Just my 2cents...
 NickiK
Joined: 7/3/2007
Msg: 242
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He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/6/2007 11:49:17 AM
Unbiased opinion? I'd tell him where to stick the ring, in oh so friendly terms, go out and try to find someone who loves me for me. Don't get me started on the religious aspect. If it's real love, any problem can be worked through. If all she's looking for is a comfortable relationship, someone to count on, there are other "fish" out there. It sounds to me like he's just making excuses. What happens when/if she loses the weight, what will the excuse be then?
 kindapicky
Joined: 8/28/2005
Msg: 244
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/6/2007 3:58:04 PM
Hey beachchick, I have several female friends I love very dearly. Some are over weight and that issue is a turn off for me. That is just me. Maybe he realizes just how beautiful and sexy to him she can be with a little weight loss. I was married to a 5'1" weighing 105 lbs, that woman could turn me on just by walking in the room. As several have said everyone has their issues.
The fact they have been together for 2.5 years means they must care for each other. Or they are just **ck buddies.
The most important thing is open communication with each other to find out why he is requesting the weight loss, and the anulment? That just sounds weird, does that mean his children would be illegitimate??
 leahmarie
Joined: 2/25/2007
Msg: 246
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/6/2007 4:24:52 PM
daisydahlia......Your friend and her boyfriend are both asking for the impossible. Expecting a woman in her late 50's to lose 30 pounds is a big deal. Women in that age range have a difficult time losing weight that I would assume has been on for years and years. Her asking him to have his marriage annulled opens the door to all kinds of legal ramifications for his children. Additionally, I suspect he has no legitimate grounds for getting an annullment, and he would probably have to lie. Once he lies to get an annullment, then his marriage to your friend would be fraudulent.

What is my unbiased view? He should accept her with the 30 pounds, and she should marry him in a civil ceremony. If they can't accept each other on these terms, then they don't belong together.

BUT AND THIS IS A VERY BIG BUT--- If her weight is presenting her with health issues, then she should lose the 30 pounds, not for him, but for the sake of her health.
 swtcarolinej
Joined: 11/11/2006
Msg: 251
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He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/6/2007 5:19:32 PM
Interesting thread...I was overweight most of my adult life,never felt good enough the whole thing it sucks...your friend needs to just move on Someones X says it best on this thread...she deserves so much better...who does he think HE is pleeease!!!That just pisses me off big time...alll these 50 and 60 year old,wanna be players grow up!!!
 Isispriest
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 259
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/9/2007 12:52:47 AM
It means that he does not Love her. He likes her and he likes to have sex with her. But he does not want to marry her. He wants to marry someone whom she might be able to be a little more like.
 Internetdatingpariah
Joined: 10/17/2004
Msg: 274
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/10/2007 12:58:44 PM
Lose 30 lbs, take the ring then dump him.
It'll serve him right for being such an A$$!
 jugularpot
Joined: 8/8/2007
Msg: 285
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He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 8:57:20 AM
Sounds like this git is a commitment phobe and thinks he is safe all the time he is telling her to lose the weight first before she gets a ring. He obviously thinks she has no hope of losing the weight and he wont have to ever commit!! A size 16 is average size for God's sake!!! Tell him to shove his relationship where the sun don't shine!
 becca210
Joined: 7/26/2006
Msg: 286
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 9:06:49 AM
I think this whole deal is a little misguided. If they have been together for a while and everyone loves everyone..........no one in their right mind would give up happiness over
30#. Do we know the whole story......if so......I say move on. Skinny is a bad word....speaking for myself and many other overweight women. We would like to loose weight ....but doubt anyone really wants to be SKINNY at 50-60 years old. You just look older. Besides, at that age, you either accept me for me or else. I accept that a man has
made his mark in terms of work.......if he is going to be successful ...he is already.
Same thing with a woman. But this is still a vibrant and active time....yet there is a
"right of passage" in my opinion, that let's everyone sort of relax and accept the status
quo.
Has she asked him to grow more hair, or loose his beer gut, or take sexual enhancement drugs.......probably not. If you are lucky enough to find "true love".....30 pounds is not
going to be a deal breaker for most people.
Becca210
 lolLori
Joined: 5/16/2006
Msg: 287
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He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 9:15:03 AM
I know someone who offered his girlfriend a TV if she quit smoking (mostly bcause he wanted it) but anyways she quit temporarily until she got the TV, quitting smoking isnt easy either. But to get the point the relationship was ups and downs like this until after the marriage and divorce constant challenges and failure when there already is enough in relationships, theres no prizes when it come from the heart it not a game or challenge. Challenge sounds like youre either going to win or lose no comprimise.
 betterlate
Joined: 12/22/2006
Msg: 292
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He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 9:44:58 AM
Tell him to grow hair and then she will accept his ring... why would they need to get married???If both are successful, there is nothing in this soceity to require they get married. Let him stew... he is probablly a balding, jackass anyway.

Screw that guy... what a pig... when he cant control his bodily functions, or is stroked out and cant feed himself,,, is he going to be so judgmental on who changes his diaper?

Tell your friend that he is basing things on exterior appearances, he cant see past his penis.. and to dump the jerk, kick him to the curb, stop with the diet pills, they DONT work and could kill her.

Start walking, eat fruit and veggies... but ONLY do it for herself, not some meathead...

JMO

:)
BL
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 293
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 9:50:46 AM

Please explain why this guy's request for his partner to live a healthier lifestyle makes him a jerk. I can't see the logical thought process here. His request didn't seem to be of the dealbreaker variety. And what about her request for his anullment? To most people when you are divorced you are free from your previous commitment.


He didn't "request" a "healthier lifestyle" -- he requested that she look better so he wouldn't be embarrassed to be seen with her.

A Catholic cannot remarry in his/her church unless the partner was never married or had an annulment.



.
 Naturally 2
Joined: 7/19/2007
Msg: 294
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 10:19:31 AM
How about your friend goes out and buys her own engagement ring!
That way she gets what she wants and if she is happy with herself,she doesnt need to lose the weight to get one.
If he were really that concerned about her health...he would also take into consideration how this will affect her mentally and emotionally.
Instead of telling her what she neeeds to do, he should be working with her...ie,taking walks,cooking together, and doing things geared towards being healthier-because what I hear sounds like a bit of blackmail.
This man does not seem as though he is fully commited to this relationship,otherwise he would get the information on how the whole"Catholic"thing works .
Maybe they need to have a heart to heart discussion about what each of them really wants from the relationship and make sure they have the same goals and motivations.
P.
 Naturally 2
Joined: 7/19/2007
Msg: 299
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 11:07:19 AM
"I see nothing posted by the OP that states this guy is unconcerned with her mental and emotional state. Quite frankly, both would improve when the physical side is taken care of. Take care of the body, and the mind follows."

And I see that this man is NOT concerned about her mental and emotional state...why else would he be putting conditions as to giving her a ring.Sorry ,I think this is a bit of blackmail,and I dont find that healthy in ANY respect.
As for the rest ,yes I agree.
But I also dont think the issue is really about the weight here,its sounds as though this man is scared and comming up with excuses...honest soul searching and communication might help both!
P.
 Naturally 2
Joined: 7/19/2007
Msg: 304
jerk
Posted: 8/16/2007 11:33:49 AM
Sort of like men that no longer do nice romantic things for their woman because she fell for him already, so where is the need ?
P.
 Naturally 2
Joined: 7/19/2007
Msg: 308
He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 11:50:42 AM
"The way I read Msg1, the woman wants the ring, and this guy, not wanting to marry a woman living an unhealthy lifestyle, requests if she lost some weight the ring might be forthcoming."

I see this as a condition...we will have to agree to disagree on this one.
P.
 darkjedi1
Joined: 8/8/2007
Msg: 318
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He Says Lose 30 lbs and He Will Give you an Engagement Ring.....Would Ya????
Posted: 8/16/2007 7:54:18 PM
Hell weight shouldnt matter. If he really loved the girl he wouldnt care. Ive dated a girl that was 5ft 9 and 400 pounds, and dated a girl that was 5ft 4 and 110 pounds, and everywhere between. Its the inside that matters more. A caring loving girl will be the same years later. Weight always changes thruout your lifetime.
 zeusie
Joined: 5/14/2007
Msg: 320
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