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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Sexually Active Seniors      Home login  
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 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 27
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Sexually Active SeniorsPage 2 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

More recent studies show that senior men are considerably more active than senior women (about twice as active), but the difference may in part be due to the lack of suitable partners for the women (because many are divorced or widowed). So the available and functional men are in considerable demand, perhaps?


Shortage of partners? A study done for the AARP in 2004 of single men/women age 40 to 69 showed that ten times (10x) as many single men in the age group were interested in an "active" sex life compared to women in that age group (1 man in 5 compared to 1 women in 50). In addition, about four times (4x) as many men in that age group wanted more or less a fair amount of sex compated to women in that age group (1 man in 2, compared to 1 women in 8). Half all single women in that age group had not desire at all for sex, and half the rest had "set the bar" so high they never again would have sex.

The 2010 study included men/women not just single but also partnered in a long term relationship. The 2010 study showed a higher level of sexual interest by woman (not surprising, half were partnered long term), though even then half of all women over age 45 had "a sexual thought" three or less times a month (yup! no more than 3 times a month!).

The most common characteristic of men/women over age 45 "having sex" is (drum roll) Good Health. 2nd (another drum roll), Exercise. 3rd, Low Stress In Their Life, 4th, Adequate Finances.

For the woman over age 45 who wants a sex life, there is no shortage of available partners.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 28
Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 10/16/2010 2:29:21 PM

For the woman over age 45 who wants a sex life, there is no shortage of available partners.


Yup. That's been my experience. Thanks for the affirmation. And the good news for men with ED is that lots of women are *looking* for them, too.

 damassteel
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 29
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 10/20/2010 4:35:49 PM
I'll be 61 tomorrow and my libido and penis are just fine. my GF (54) is functioning better than well. We are both in the best of health and live well. Giving up sex has never even crossed my mind...EVER.
 mateo45
Joined: 1/17/2008
Msg: 30
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/8/2010 12:31:20 PM

Is it common for seniors to be concerned about "safe sex?


Dunno if it's "common", but it sure oughta be. Actually, herpes seems to be the most common STD, and agreed, an AIDS test should be pretty much a given before any unprotected intimacy nowadays, regardless the age. The fact is that even that seemingly "inexperienced" widow (or widower) could easily have picked up some "souvenir" during their newfound "freedom".
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 31
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/10/2010 7:19:35 AM

Not fair more Seniors are getting more action than me..lol


Don't cry , one of these days you'll become a Senior and you'll have a lots of actions.. You'll give it away for nothing (no LTR, No Nothing) ,plus a free dinners and $$...
Hey! don't give me that kinda look, as if I made this up, I've seen this on TV...
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 32
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/10/2010 6:39:23 PM

YIKES, don't you have a casino to go to?


Nah, I'm tired of casinos. I work in a casino, I invested my hard earn money at casino slot machines, then I got wiser..I put my nickels and squarters in a Piggy Bank.
 pugear
Joined: 6/4/2005
Msg: 33
Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 2:36:43 AM
Older men for the most part have performance issues to deal with that most often are not blue pill curable. Women regardless of age don't have to deal with performance issues. They simply have to be there. Most older men are reclusive. We are more set in our ways and not as interested in putting up with wild emotional swings of older women. Old women on the whole are more sexually agressive than their younger counter parts. Given the greater number of older available women older men have a much wider choice of partners, assuming they want one. The reality is that most don't, simply because the pluses don't make up for the minuses in most relationships.
 mateo45
Joined: 1/17/2008
Msg: 34
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 4:14:36 AM
Older men for the most part have performance issues to deal with that most often are not blue pill curable.


Hey, speak for yourself, dude (LOL)!!

Although, seriously, I think you're right that a lot of older guys are probably more "reclusive", especially if they're single. Women just instinctively seem to make more effort to cultivate social connections with other women, and of course they'll also have the whole family thing going with their adult children (especially daughters) and grandchildren.

And I notice that women will also make much more effort to keep in touch with family (even a very "difficult" & adversarial family), than men will. But guys will likely have fewer, yet closer old friends that they trust or confide in. I imagine it's likely just a holdover from our ancient "hunter-gatherer days", when the guys went off hunting and women worked closer together minding the kids & homefront.
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 35
Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 5:12:26 AM
Speaking from right now in my life,
I have noticed that I don't miss sexual activity..
nor do I sit around thinking how I wish it were going on.
But I do know that I am still "alive" (lol) because in the close presence of some men I'll sure feel the center inside tingling.
Thing is, I just don't want to mess around with someone just because I've got that tingling.
Not when I know "in the morning" I'd really REALLY want to be out of there because on other levels there wasn't a lot of connecting.
So until The Tingle and other good feelings of connection happen at the same time? I'm a non-sexually active senior.
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 36
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 6:26:22 AM

I do know that I am still "alive" (lol) because in the close presence of some men I'll sure feel the center inside tingling.
Thing is, I just don't want to mess around with someone just because I've got that tingling.


If you don't want to "mess around with someone" for whom you have "that tingling" feeling, who do you want "to mess around with"?

Nobody staring at the ceiling the last 30 minutes of their life wishes they had had few lovers. Life happens one day at a time, with no lost days ever repeated.
 kari135
Joined: 9/1/2009
Msg: 37
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 6:29:26 AM

Older men for the most part have performance issues to deal with that most often are not blue pill curable. Women regardless of age don't have to deal with performance issues. They simply have to be there. Most older men are reclusive. We are more set in our ways and not as interested in putting up with wild emotional swings of older women. Old women on the whole are more sexually agressive than their younger counter parts. Given the greater number of older available women older men have a much wider choice of partners, assuming they want one. The reality is that most don't, simply because the pluses don't make up for the minuses in most relationships.

The world you live in sure isn't the one I live in. I don't particularly want to get married again, though I wouldn't rule it out, but it would be great to find someone I could live with. At this point, I'd be happy just to find someone who isn't all wrong - I'm way past the drama and clingy types. Not gonna happen here, though. Nor is there 'a much wider choice of partners' - I'm not interested in anyone younger than my offspring, nor am I interested in anyone who just wants a little strange stuff on the side while his wife is at work.

And before anyone jumps in and says I just have to get out in the real world, it's a very small town and the closest thing to social life is either church or high school sports. The closest I've come to having an actual conversation with anyone who wasn't trying to sell me something was with the man who told me I was the devil's spawn because I politely declined to attend his church. Actually, I suppose he was trying to sell me something, I just wasn't buying.
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 38
Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 6:45:11 AM

If you don't want to "mess around with someone" for whom you have "that tingling" feeling, who do you want "to mess around with"?

I answered that here:
So until The Tingle and other good feelings of connection happen at the same time



Nobody staring at the ceiling the last 30 minutes of their life wishes they had had few lovers.
Some people very well may! You don't know.


Life happens one day at a time, with no lost days ever repeated.
Sure do agree with that.
But we all do have our various very individualistic ways in which we greatly enjoy those days.
Mine just happens to include not having sex just for sex.
I've gone through stages.. Lord, we all have.. and at this particular individualistic stage I'm getting my most enjoyment with not playing around sexually, just for the playing time.
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 39
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 7:19:01 AM
^^^ If one sets the bar very high, meaning NO sex until and unless a long list of "other things" are also present, one can quickly get to the point where maybe one (1) person in three hundred thousand (300,000) meets the demanded requirements.

THAT means _if_ one meets one (1) new potential partner each day, every day, it might take upwards of one-thousand (1,000) years to find a partner. That's the next time they have sex, one thousand years (1,000 years!) from now.

Meeting -- and discarding -- one (1) new potential partner each day -- without fail -- seems like an awful lot of effort. A thousand (1,000) years from now, it BETTER be good!!!
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 40
Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 7:59:50 AM
^^ long "list"?? What about just "we connect on other levels too"?
That's MY 'list'. That's what I was talking about.
It's not such a huge "demanded requirement"!

maybe one (1) person in three hundred thousand (300,000) meets the demanded requirements.

(as if I'd ever be in a 300,000 men situation to even say "no"!!)
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 41
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 1:57:32 PM
Again, the paradox. So many minuses out there, so few pluses, yet the lament oft heard that a loving relationship with sexual dimensions is an ever distant goal to be pursued with energy, dedication and passion.

1000 years is too long to wait for sex. A week is too long to wait for sex, actually. Alas, n'ere the twane shall meet!

Och, lassies, ye dunna ha te cook fer me just te ha me body.....
 StevieCashmere
Joined: 4/22/2009
Msg: 42
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 2:12:09 PM
Being active without age is great thing, show you value your body

~Stevie
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 43
Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 2:29:12 PM

Being active without age is great thing, show you value your body

Can any one else figure out exactly what this youngster is saying in that sentence?
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 44
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 3:57:17 PM



Being active without age is great thing, show you value your body


Can any one else figure out exactly what this youngster is saying in that sentence


Let me take a stab at it. I think he's saying if you postpone joy long enough, you'll be dead.

On the other hand, he _may_ be saying if you don't use it, you don't use it.
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 45
Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 4:31:39 PM
^^ I don't see either of those 2 things in his sentence.


LOL

*might* mean being sexually active doesn't have anything to do with age.. it's great to not think about age.
and 'show you value your body' *could* mean don't be giving it to all who ask ...
or..
pass that value around. hahahahaaaaaaaaaa
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 46
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 5:19:04 PM
^^^ I have never met a woman who said she was "waiting" who ever seemed to have found what she was waiting for at any point in the future.

"Waiting" seems to be a statement of intent, a fortified, lock-jaw position.

Lots of women toss and turn at night, crying because there is no man beside them. Lots.

Others say they are comfortable "waiting", waiting forever if need be. Those who toss and turn never seem to proselytize; those who "wait" often seem to. I doubt the born-again waiters with triple locked bedroom doors ever convert many of the tossers and turners who wear filmy nightgowns night after night hoping against hope.

Those born to wait, generally wait and wait and wait and wait ... the heart never ever beating rapidly until, in the end, the heart beats not at all, the body cooling off to room termperature.

A survey done for AARP in 2004 of single men/women age 40 to 69 found that 75% of those (single) women will never again have sex with a man in their lives. In fact, the woman PhD who did the survey commented that lack of sexual interest was likely THE reason so many (single) women in that age group never married or had husbands who divorced them. The same survey found there is no shortage of (single) men in that age group who have normal interest in a woman.

"Waiting" for the right set of improbable circumstances in the context of "singlehood" has much nuance. Most who "wait", wait until there is no more sunshine ever again. There is no reason to accept their advice on how to effect a normal male/female relationship. Unless, one -- deep at heart -- also wants to "wait" until moments after the heart stops beating forever.
 mateo45
Joined: 1/17/2008
Msg: 47
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 6:50:56 PM
"75%... never again", geez, that's an amazing statistic (and well said too... thanks)!
 URXO2
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 48
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 7:04:36 PM
Don't believe everything you read Wayde......
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 49
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Sexually Active Seniors
Posted: 11/27/2010 7:37:03 PM

How many in that sample?


Something over 3,300. If random -- it appeared to be -- about 3,300% (33 times) the needed sample size to be valid to a confidence level greater than 95%.

From the world of science, "If the conclusion does not fit the data, the data is wrong"?

Luddites, please sit to the back and left, and wear your green shirts, please.
 mateo45
Joined: 1/17/2008
Msg: 50
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Posted: 11/27/2010 7:54:02 PM
Actually, if it's what WWW is referring to, here's the AARP study:
http://assets.aarp.org/rgcenter/general/divorce.pdf

"(As a group) the majority of divorced women (56%) report sexual touching or hugging in varying degrees of frequency (daily to once or twice a month), while 38 percent of the total claim not having any at all. Six percent of the total did not respond to this question.
The majority of women, especially unmarried women (69%), do not touch or
hug at all sexually."
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