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 RidingRich
Joined: 9/21/2007
Msg: 168
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???Page 3 of 16    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)
I think the worst had to be when I was way younger. The girl I was with at the time was still living with her parents, and we decided to slip off for a bit of fun in one of the other rooms. Well, as shes on her knees doing some oral, her dad, a habitual non knocker on closed doors type, bursts in to announce dinner was ready. So, natural reaction for her was to look at the source of the noise in shock. Now, wouldn't have been so bad but well, Already past that point of no return, it'd been a while and um well, kinda whitewashed her about the face and neck. He just stared blankly, and shut the door.

quietest
meal
ever
 I.W.700
Joined: 9/11/2007
Msg: 170
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History
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/5/2007 7:51:51 PM
Me and my girl were into it, she was on her front and I'm well ya behind just doing our thing (face in the pillow to muffle) and the bedroom door opens... her MOM found my wallet on the floor and decided I needed it rite then. thanx MOM, I couldn't finish either, or look her in the face at dinner
 gpwgyrene
Joined: 10/2/2007
Msg: 175
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/7/2007 10:28:50 AM
Was stimulating Marcia's "G" spot and she gave me a "Golden Shower!"-fortunately it was in a motel and It was only my hand!

Whew!
 debbywebby32
Joined: 5/27/2006
Msg: 177
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History
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/7/2007 10:13:56 PM
he has lost a few condoms in his day. "He asks where did it go?", i said "think where is the last place you had it". Dumbass. course there was the time he lost his erection ring...and a few beads...He had to go fishing.
More then one occasion i asked are you sure its in?
They dont make those erection pumps for the mini me size.
have to say, im happily divorced now
 footballatrider
Joined: 7/10/2007
Msg: 178
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/8/2007 4:14:30 AM
I was getting a BJ in my car from a woman on our second date. We were parked at a roadside rest stop. She told me to watch out for people. She was sucking on me, when I saw a police car cruise nearby. I mentioned this to her, and she popped up and saw the cops walking towords my car. I was paralized. She finally told me to pull up my pants BEFORE cops saw what I am packing, LOL.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 180
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History
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/17/2007 11:04:56 PM
I wake up to find it was a but a dream!!!
 catman40
Joined: 5/20/2007
Msg: 185
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/23/2007 8:20:37 AM
well not worst but funny . My ex-girlfreind and I were having sex . mom and ada thauhgt we were moving furniter . that was one funny thing . 3 years l;ater I told them we were having sex . gives a whole new meaning to sqeeking bed .
 short_momma
Joined: 9/23/2007
Msg: 193
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/29/2007 5:59:36 PM
This didnt happen to me but i was part of it, my sister has never forgiven me!!

Years and years ago, when i was maybe 6 or so i went into my sisters room after she had been in there with her boyfriend. I was a snoopy lil thing! I found a balloon in her bed and ran downstairs to ask mom if i could have it because if i had asked my sister she would have known i was in her bedroom. Mom said no but did want to speak with my sister!

well as you might have guessed by now............... it wasnt a balloon hahahhahah
 Carole789
Joined: 10/6/2007
Msg: 194
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/29/2007 6:59:18 PM
OMG- This one I can relate to. I thought it was his finger until he held my face with both hands, poor guy.
 Tu_ez
Joined: 2/1/2006
Msg: 196
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History
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/29/2007 10:10:39 PM
She turned into a wife

OMG janey lou remind me to tape a popsicle stick to it ifin we ever hookup. No jokes about this CC ok...
 okimgame
Joined: 10/2/2007
Msg: 203
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 10/31/2007 2:38:44 AM
Not worst, but the funniest. It was when i first started dating my now ex. We where going at it hammer and tongs and i had my legs up over his shoulders. (felt like i was about to do a backwards rollover) told him we where slipping, "No where not" he said and kept thrusting. "We're slipping off the bed" I said again. He now almost ready to cum replies "We're not, we're not". Well next minute both of us fly off the bed head first into the wardrobe. I hit my head, and we made such a noise the old coot he was living with came to see what the hell we where doing. Couldn't stop laughing then and still find it funny now.
 rumbeachtime
Joined: 12/5/2007
Msg: 220
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 12/27/2007 6:11:18 AM
many moons ago....i was working in a jazz night club as a teenage barback...i also lived 50 yards away from where i worked....i was 19 living with my gf and sleeping with an older bartender and a nieghbor....so i was busy with 3...shit i was young and delivering....it went on for about 9 months....and it all unraveled withing a couple of days....my gf worked 9-5... at 9:05 my neighbor would come over....then in the afternoon , my work mate......well....within a couple of days the bartenders husband followed her and was pounding on my door.....the neighbors bf found out from another neighbor.....same such neighbor told my gf....i went from king of the world to a shaken junkie going thru withdrawls....oh yea gf moved out next day...dont know if this follows the subject....boy do i still miss those days....that fat **** nark
 naeco
Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 221
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 12/27/2007 10:37:34 AM
Although I haven't read all 13 pages, and there are some GOOD ones on here, this was the best in my opinion:

welll.......me and my ex were getting it on one night, and he gets on top starts getting really into it....adn i dont know what the guy was thinking but he screams out (as he was cumming)
"I LOVE YOU OPTIMUS PRIME!!!" and im thinking w.t.f!!!!! do i look like a fcuking 20 foot 2 tonne robot to you????? nedless to say we broke up shortly after hahaha


What in the F*CK could that guy have been thinking??? I don't want to know.

Personally, I've tried to really think back, and I can't think of anything bad every happening during sex. Nobody walked in on me and a partner, nothing wild or crazy ever happened (that wasn't intentional). I guess I've just been lucky.
 Boricua Papi
Joined: 10/8/2007
Msg: 228
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 2/22/2008 9:40:47 PM
During a nice doggy style my girl had a "smelly accident". She was so embarrased. I cleaned up and started banging again!
 GREAT EXPERT 900
Joined: 2/14/2008
Msg: 233
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 2/23/2008 10:09:02 AM
the worst things that happens alot during sex for me is ...when i'm close to cumming, i have to piss. i go piss right quick and jump back on the **** and have to build it back up again, which is frustrating.
 ashybear
Joined: 7/23/2007
Msg: 234
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 2/23/2008 10:11:12 AM
well i was 17 and it was my first time. i was having a party my mum had gone away with my 2 younger sisters and b/f it was just a small party 6 others (including my 15 yr old sis).
so i take this guy ive known 4 ages to my room and we start with the foreplay and i had 2 leave the room 4 a min 2 talk 2 my mum on phone (the cover up was always first coz if we got busted we would b dead) anyway wen i came back in i forgot 2 lock my door and half hr later my sister walked in and turned on lights.
poor guy, i grabbed the blanket to cover myself and he was left there holding his c**k.
im a bigger then adverage girl and i was more worried of him seeing me then my sister

 pearlj
Joined: 3/1/2007
Msg: 239
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/15/2008 5:44:13 AM
I have a few, but I am far too ashamed to post them under my real profile. But one I remember, my ex and I were going at it hard core...in the woods...totally normal...right? Anyway I was gettin' into it despite the stick in my back, when he decided it was time to change positions, so I got on top (ah, yes, the old standby) so I finally got back into the "roll" and he starts screaming, and I am talkin' total, all out, **** screaming! I was waaaay into it and started going at it harder thinking ":Man! Ive never made someone scream before!" Then his screams turn slightly;y wild, like a really loud high pitched squirrel, or what I would imagine a turtle would sound like if it could scream....(no idea where the turtle thing came from, but hey, its late, Im sleep deprived aaaaanyway) it was too much for me, and as I stop thrusting he reaches up and literally throws me off with one had and goes running through the woods. I am butt naked but, its the woods, so I start chasing him thinking he's running from some crazy animal that he saw comin' at us but that I somehow missed, we make it back to the cabin, and he runs immediately to the bathroom. I start banging on the door asking "What the hell happened?!?" After about 3 minutes he answers the door i go in as he is limping back to the toilet seat, and then I see it. I see a large black fang about 1 inch long sticking straight out of his thigh, he's tearing up and I start laughing, I was rolling on the floor for a good ten minutes while he was declaring "That was one HELL of a spider, you should have seen that thing, its NOT funny!" After I pulled it together I went to grab some tweezers so I could help remove the thing, I spent another ten minutes trying to "get serious": but every time I went near the fang with the tweezers I remembered "the scream" and cracked up laughing again, so finally he took over, and when he pulled it out it was so big that I saw the skin pull away from his thigh....well needless to say I am not a sadist but this had me cracking up all over again. So he gets up still pissed at me for laughing, I use the bathroom and realize that our having sex had triggered my period, and to this day I have to say that I have never been blamed for something so unfortunate in such a uniquely creative way. He said that my blood had "attracted" the spider, therefore it was my fault. All I had to do to embarrass him from then on out though, was to look at him and quietly mimic that ****y lil girl scream of his. To this day he will never live down running through the woods screaming like a maniac. Love it, and that tops the cake for funny....as for disgusting,,,, lol j/k.
 pearlj
Joined: 3/1/2007
Msg: 240
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/15/2008 5:55:15 AM

During sex, he kept saying "you are just so unbelievably wet, you rock.." we had tons of sex..... Fell asleep, I woke up first and it was kinda light out.... I see that EVERYTHING (me, him, blankets, sheets....) is covered in blood!!!!! What did I do..didn't wake him up, and ran like the wind! BAD GIRL, lol

Poor guy he probably thinks to this day that he killed you and hid your body in a blackout lol. puurty scurry lol
 pearlj
Joined: 3/1/2007
Msg: 241
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/15/2008 7:11:22 AM

welll.......me and my ex were getting it on one night, and he gets on top starts getting really into it....adn i dont know what the guy was thinking but he screams out (as he was cumming)
"I LOVE YOU OPTIMUS PRIME!!!" and im thinking w.t.f!!!!! do i look like a fcuking 20 foot 2 tonne robot to you????? nedless to say we broke up shortly after hahaha


He soooo lost a bet and had to scream that out as punishment.
 afashionlady
Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 247
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/21/2008 6:29:29 AM
Hmmm...I spent last night reading these and laughing my arse off...

My contribution...

An ex and I were going at it like monkeys...while his teenaged daughter was in the house. Upstairs. We were being very quiet, which for us was hard. All of a sudden, she comes flying down the steps, yelling "hey dad, I need to talk to you"...I don't think I ever saw my ex move that fast to bar her from getting in the door! D**k flopping, I'm trying to cover up, and she's like open the door...! He asked her through the door what did she want...do you know what that child wanted??? "Can I go to my friend's house?" HELL YEAH ALREADY! He told her call her friend to come get her now! We waited until we knew for sure she was gone...after laughing for a good bit, continued on!! But from then on, locked door!!!!

Or the time that me and an ex decided that we couldn't wait to get to my house...drove to the roof top of a shopping mall parking lot, and were in the back of his car. It started raining, which gave us courage to get, well rowdy...then all of a sudden we hear someone parking right next to us...!! What the??? 2 guys had saw the car "rockin" and decided to come and take a peek. In the damn rain...pervs!! My ex opened the window and said some very nasty things that aren't fit for print, they decided maybe not worth that...and left. By then, I had gotten panties on, skirt down and was looking like a prim schoolteacher. Mood killed...!!
 bubblesandrainbows
Joined: 6/17/2008
Msg: 251
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/22/2008 12:01:50 AM
When i was 15 the boys mother walked into his room jsut as we were getting into it (she had never met of probably heard of me before). She calmly closed the door and walked away. I freaked out and went to stand up and fainted (i think it was because i had just gotten over the flu and us two little 15 year old brats had polished off a bottle of his dads jack danials). When i came I was back on the guys bed with a sheet drapped over my naked body and the mother was dabbing my forehead with a cold washer! Then she damanded i rest there she would make me some food and i msut let her drive me home instead of catching the train. Im pretty sure she didnt put poisen in my food and for the little longer time i was seeing the guy she was always really nice!
 sriannaailyim
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 252
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/22/2008 8:39:51 AM
LOL- this thread is hilarious
 jessicarenee1977
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 254
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History
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/22/2008 9:32:55 AM
I have been rolling from reading this. Too funny.

I have a couple.

The worst thing that ever happened to me was with an old bf. We had been together off and on for a couple of years. I was at his house, we were very hot and heavy into it on the livingroom floor, when he just stops, gets off, tells me to change positions, so that I was on my knees, but leaning over the couch. He tells me he wants to try something different. That was all fine and dandy.......until he called his dog over. I jumped up, asked him in a not so nice, extemely colorful way, if he had fell and bumped his head, and what was wrong with him. I gathered my clothing and ran to my car and hauled butt outta there, not bothering to stop to put them on till I was safely down the road, away from doggie lover. Never saw him again.

The most embarassing moment. Not long after the ex and I had seperated, I was home alone. The kids were with my soon to be ex mother and sister in law. So of course, I decided to use my alone time wisely, and break out the vibes. Well ,they brought the kids home early. I had not heard them pull up, but I heard the kids talking. I was trying to quickly turn off my toys and find some clothes. I had managed to throw on a night gown, and had gotten the vibes stuffed under the couch cushion just as everyone was walking in. I greeted them, hugged my kids, then went to sit down on the couch. They had just began telling me about the day they had together, when all of a sudden, we all hear this buzzing sound. It was not exactly quiet either. I was trying not to bust out laughing, while trying to figure out how I was gonna stop that without just pulling it out. So I grab a baby blanket and throw it over my legs, and grab my pillows, and put them on my lap, then start trying to casually dig under the couch cushion to find Fred. It took forever to find it, in the mean time, my sister in law was jsut sitting there looking at me, with this stupid smirk on her face (holier than though type). About the time I finally get a hold of it, pull it up under the pillows and blanket, and get it off, my mother in law then figures out what it is. I heard this little gasp, then an OH MY, then she asked my daughter to show her the new paint in her bedroom. I didn't know if I wanted to go crawl under a rock, or die from laughing so hard after they left.
 wylder1
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 255
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/23/2008 11:44:21 PM
The boat rolled. I fell in the water, dragging her with me. She couldn't swim. I was tangled in the sheets. It all worked out but for one thing. She never returned my calls.

- W.
 luckyliam71
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 256
Worst thing that has ever happened during sex???
Posted: 6/24/2008 6:54:52 AM
I had just met a new girl, and she was very multi orgasmic. She could literally just take it all in and somehow squeeze one off without a lot of effort on my part. She was playing cowgirl, and squeezed off a real big one....and SHIT on me. She didn't even notice. She was surprised when I asked if I could take a shower. She just looked at me funny and pointed the way. At least I can say I literally "****ed the shit out of her". Never saw her again after that. I wonder why?
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