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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?      Home login  
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 great_kahuna
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 276
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?Page 12 of 34    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34)
redarcangel ....thanks for the apology, but there was really no need for it. Maybe my posts are just interpreted wrongly. I just stated a fact that men, in this case myself, are crapped on too. And I am not saying that it was'nt 50% my fault . The problem with a Forum like this , is that one never really knows the other person.

Kahuna

PS: and even after several relationships, after my divorce, which did not work out , I don't think I am "bitter"......just pissed off a little sometimes.
 outofthedesert
Joined: 10/27/2007
Msg: 277
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 11/13/2007 2:12:46 PM
Kahuna, no one was slamming you--but we were simply trying to indicate that sometimes in a marriage/divorce--women get the shaft and men get the goldmine.
 great_kahuna
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 278
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 11/13/2007 3:43:12 PM
I did'nt think you were....just made a statement.

But if anyone would have "slammed " me for no reason , you would have heard about it.

Kahuna
 Wherefore Art Thou?
Joined: 7/21/2007
Msg: 279
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 11/15/2007 7:47:50 PM
Ahem. I couldn't resist copying this from Yahoo News today:
Senior singletons revel in their freedom: study

By Paul Majendie Thu Nov 15, 11:39 AM ET

LONDON (Reuters Life!) - Women over 60 feel much healthier and happier living alone and revel in their lifestyle as so-called senior singletons, a study showed on Thursday.
ADVERTISEMENT

A classic example was 79-year-old former Bond girl and "Avengers" TV star Honor Blackman who said: "What I've learnt from my two marriages and divorces is that I'm not much good at living with other people."

The study, funded by the Economic and Social Research Council, looked at the growing social and health implications of people living alone -- Britain now has more people aged over 60 than it does children.

"In England, older women rated their health better if they lived alone," the study concluded.

The twilight years were being enjoyed with gusto by legions of latter-day Bridget Joneses.

Once alone, their relief was palpable, especially if they had spent years looking after ailing husbands.

"In England and Wales, older women living alone reported better self-rated health than married women of the same age," said Professor Emily Grundy of the Centre for Population Studies at the London School of Hygiene and Medicine.

"One reason might be that some of the married older women may have caring responsibilities for their spouses which might affect their self-rated health," Grundy said.

The older generation in Northern Europe were generally more content with their lot, the study also found.

"Older people in Scandinavia were happier than in other regions of Europe. In Scandinavia, there are generous welfare systems," said Grundy, whose centre conducted the research for the Economic and Social Research Council.

The Daily Telegraph newspaper picked Honor Blackman as a perfect case study to illustrate the report with the actress confessing that life with one love forever could be a trifle tedious.

"I suppose it must be possible to be faithful in a long-term relationship, I cannot imagine how you could do it though. And I'm not sure I'd want it actually. Wouldn't it be a bit dull?"

(Editing by Paul Casciato, Reuters Messaging):
 GrandmaBooBoo
Joined: 12/30/2006
Msg: 280
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Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 11/22/2007 9:12:15 PM

Maybe my posts are just interpreted wrongly.
LOL, yup, I've interpreted Kahuna wrongly....and found out that he's an ok kinda guy. (just don't let it go to yer head, ok?) LOL! Hey, are jokes allowed here?

If a man says something, and there's no woman around to hear it....is he STILL wrong? LOL! (just thought we could use an entertainment break)
 friendlyldy
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 281
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Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 11/22/2007 9:18:50 PM

If a man says something, and there's no woman around to hear it....is he STILL wrong? LOL! (just thought we could use an entertainment break)


Love that! You gotta love men! Every one of them knows that feeling and they still want us!
 WearRed
Joined: 8/18/2007
Msg: 282
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 1/15/2008 9:40:04 PM
Most of the women over 40 are not desperate to get married, for the most part we were married before so.... It is you who have been picked the few desperate ones, just that.
 midnight chatter
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 283
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 1/15/2008 10:02:00 PM
Maybe you are so hot they cant control themselves.
 outofthedesert
Joined: 12/9/2007
Msg: 284
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 1/16/2008 4:05:23 AM
Let me think:

You are addicted to Chaos and your profile clearly states you want a short term only. Run, Forestina, Run.

Maybe they think you could be the latest project and they could just be the one to change you. Perhaps they assume you might change your mind.

If you truly have no intention of getting married change "want short term only" to "I just want a roll in the hay and I have no intention in he!! of ever marrying you. If you can get down with that, then I am your man". That will get the point across to alot, but a few can't read clear statements much less between the lines.
 CallmeJewels
Joined: 3/13/2007
Msg: 285
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 1/16/2008 3:17:17 PM
I do want to get married again.

After 2, 4 months is way too fast for me! I am much more cautious this time around.
 MarriageMinded55
Joined: 1/27/2006
Msg: 286
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/1/2008 3:19:38 AM
Women over 40 are desperate to get married? You sure could have fooled me, I thought that they didn't want to get married. Actually I'm the one who is desperate to get married, I can't find any woman in the NY area who wants marriage and I'm talking about women over 50.

No offense but too bad that one of those women didn't try to "rush" me into marriage because you'd see two very happy people right now; myself and that woman (who would now be my wife).
 candylily765
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 287
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/1/2008 3:11:47 PM

I like my freedom now and would find it very hard to even think about marriage. Even the thought of living with a man sends shivers up my spine too. Dating on the weekend or a long weekend with a man is great..but..I too feel it's best to come home to my own house..put my feet up on the coffee table and go...ahhhhhhhhh!!! Peace..and..quiet!!!

That's exactly the way I look at it, Redcarangel. I love spending long weekends with a guy I care about, but I have no real desire to live with anyone. I would have to be totally and completely out-of-my-mind crazy about someone before I could imagine even considering the possibility of marriage again and I would still be hesitant. Marriage is ideal when you're young and wanting to have and raise kids, but I'm not sure what the appeal is when that's no longer a consideration. I truly wish my husband hadn't allowed his alcoholism to destroy our marriage. It eventually caused his death exactly one year ago today but I had already left him 5 years earlier. I could have stayed happily married forever if he had stopped drinking and I went into it with that intention, but it didn't work out that way and marriage is a very scary word to me now.
 fixitfred
Joined: 11/10/2007
Msg: 288
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Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/1/2008 8:15:33 PM
Because they know they are (getting) old and many men their age prefer younger women and they resent that.
 Moonchild51
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 289
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Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/1/2008 8:25:42 PM
C'mon Fred...get off the pot! Such an old tune to be played for sure!
I see a lot of gals saying they would love nothing more than to spend a luxurious, sensual weekend with a man. No marriage mentioned at all! I have to ask? Just what is wrong with that pic? Freddy? You wouldn't love a weekend such as I described? Without the pressure of a lady saying show me the ring first???
 friendlyldy
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 290
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Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 3:30:53 AM
I would like to get married again but I don't think that makes me desperate.
Wayne passed away 5 years ago and I haven't run out and tried to jump into anything with anyone......... I have a busy life, lots of friends, lots of activities, and I'm open to just dating and having fun but I would keep myself open if the guy I was dating never wanted to get married again.
 ENKINDLEME
Joined: 2/1/2008
Msg: 291
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 1:54:13 PM
That problem is not gender specific. There are men out there who want things from women at times we may not wish to provide to them. I suppose some women could ask the question, "why are men so desparate for sex?" At your age, you are going to meet women who are mature and ready to be settled in life. If you want a playmate...maybe try the local brothal?
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 292
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Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 3:14:08 PM
There are both men and women who are desperate to get married, and some that are just desperate for anyone to be in their lives.
 forum101
Joined: 2/5/2008
Msg: 293
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Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 4:51:43 PM
I didnt know I was desperate to get married. Here I thought I was holding down a full time job, raising children on my own, living my full, busy life. Thanks for telling me this.
 MarriageMinded55
Joined: 1/27/2006
Msg: 294
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 4:59:06 PM
Moraima,

Really?

I don't think that there is even one single woman over 45 in NY who is truly desperate to get married.

I would have found her or she would have found me if it were so because I am desperate to get married and I don't hide it.
 Guesswhoo
Joined: 11/10/2007
Msg: 295
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 5:18:19 PM
I wonder if 2 desperates would get along well? *humm*
 rosebuds57
Joined: 1/21/2007
Msg: 296
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 5:38:22 PM
I would love to be in a loving, stable and permanent relationship....be it with or without a legal document that states we are married. The KEY words are loving, and stable. I have been married twice and unfortunately, neither was very loving or stable, so I'm not so desperate to tie the knot again. I've been divorced for almost 12 years now, with only one LTR since the divorce, so I guess I'm not too desparate.

I really would like to find my last love and spend the rest of my days here on earth being his one and only, but I'm not so sure that it is possible in this day to achieve that.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 297
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 7:13:06 PM
If they were, there wouldn't be so many "nice guys finish last" threads on this board. . . .


 southernlass
Joined: 5/2/2006
Msg: 298
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/2/2008 9:38:23 PM
Marriage Minded 55 said in post 311:

Women over 40 are desperate to get married? You sure could have fooled me, I thought that they didn't want to get married. Actually I'm the one who is desperate to get married, I can't find any woman in the NY area who wants marriage and I'm talking about women over 50.


You sound like a real sweetheart, hon. I'm really glad you made your desires known and suggest that you continue doing so on various other threads as well. One of these lovely ladies is going to see what you're writing and respond. Decent men that want to get married and create a life together are rare and special. I'm hoping the best for you and I do believe you will find what you're looking for soon. Blessings!

[If you can get a friend to take another picture of yourself that isn't blurry, I bet that would really help. You seem attractive but it's kind of hard to tell because your picture isn't very clear.]

Now onto the topic at hand:

Women are not desperate to get married unfortunately, at least obviously not desperate enough. If they were desperate, they would be excercising their noggins and playing extremely hard to get until an engagement ring was gleaming on their finger. If a woman wants a man to marry her and wants to land the kind of gentleman that will stand by her in a true partnership that will last the duration, she waits until he comes along and doesn't put out for anyone. She doesn't settle for the casual sex, serial monogamy- style relationships of today. She's far too smart for that.

Most women of my age have been around the block a little. They aren't stupid. And if they're not waiting with determination for what they want, they obviously really don't want to be married again for whatever their reasons.
 Exzetra
Joined: 2/25/2008
Msg: 299
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/3/2008 12:49:05 AM
Dear Chaos, you have 4 pix in a row. The 3rd pix doesn't look like you (it looks like my neighbour)black hair, dark beard, light blue shirt. 4th pix of you is of an overweight person (and you described yourself as average). And LDS is Latter Day Saints (Mormons). In your religion, people are supposed to be looking for marriage. You state in your profile that you want a short term relationship only. The 4 woman that you dated did not come from the POF dating site or they would have seen that line for certain. You need to speak plainly and tell the woman that you meet, that you only want a short term relationship (wham bam-thank you madame). There is a particular site in POF that perhaps will be of more benefit to you. I am in my 40's and I have never heard a lady in my age range, single/divorced, ever say that she wants to get married, except 1 (my children's nanny). She is of the mormon faith, and has already been married and divorced 5 times. And she wants a husband #6 because that is what your religion dictates. You can not, or are not supposed to, have sex outside of the institution of marriage. So perhaps you need to speak to an elder of your faith to help you figure out why you are confused about this issue. As I don't believe it's the women that are confused. Are you speaking with forked tongue or giving false messages? I like to go slow. I cherish my 'singlehood', relish a great companion, and keep the door open to marriage way-down-the-road. I have been divorced for 19 years. Good luck to you my dear, I believe you will need it.
 cdn*guy
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 300
Why are women over 40 so desperate to get married?
Posted: 3/3/2008 12:56:55 AM
Women over 40 are so desperate to get married? Really ?? I haven’t found that at all – quite the opposite, actually. I’ve found, almost without exception, that women that I’ve dated over 40 are definitely not looking for marriage. How else would you explain every date I’ve been on, that the woman has said: “I wouldn’t marry you if you were the last man on earth.” Obviously, most women are not looking to marry much anymore.

cdn guy
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