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 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 325
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!Page 20 of 21    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)
forthempire....you have it, pretty much right on. Don't bother arguing with closed minded people. A player sets their own game rules and the object of their attention really never knows what that object is/was until the game is over. Could be money, could be sex, could be a roof over their heads, could be the crowd one associates with. But for a player, there is always a pay off for THEM, at someone else's expense.

Its a derogatory term and not something one should be proud of being called.
 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 327
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/13/2007 1:22:03 PM
I'm wondering, wouldn't "Gold digger" be the other side of the coin, in reference to describing the female version? A woman who uses sex, stroking, ego building techniques to miss lead a male into thinking she genuinely cares, .....for the end result, to garner, expensive dates, trips, the big home, the porch, the unlimited credit cards and the big bank account. You know, along with the "trophy wife" or "younger mistress". It's done for the rewards.

Kinda like gigolo and high classed call girls are the two sides of that coin. They both do it for money. Each paid for their services.
 southernlass
Joined: 5/2/2006
Msg: 328
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/14/2007 12:01:25 AM
Obviously no one is an expert here and everyone has an opinion of what the correct definition of a player is. Bearing that in mind, here are a few more opinions to add to the mix. The only difference I see is that these opinions are published and out there, and thus in my mind, have been well defined after some research into the matter has occurred. And they have been put out for public consumption as a sort of "official" definition. Personally, I think that these kind of definitions carry more weight, at least for me they do. Take a look and see what you think.

American Heritage Dictionary - Slang
Player - One who actively seeks out sexual partners and carries on a number of sexual affairs at the same time.

Wikepedia - the free encyclopedia -
Player may refer to:
Player (dating), slang term for a (usually male, but also female) individual skilled at sexual seduction

WordNet - noun
a person who pursues a number of different social and sexual partners simultaneously

WordNet® 3.0, © 2006 by Princeton University.

And finally, this small published thesis I found on the topic:

What is a Player in Internet Dating?
By B. Todd Steinway

We are in the age of Internet dating. Many people seem very cautious when first Internet dating, and rightfully so. I have personally Internet dated and have had a few very satisfying and rewarding dating and relationship experiences. But, what I want to talk about in this article is the concept of what a "Player" is in the Internet dating world.
I first came across the term "Player" when reading profiles. If I had to define the term, I think I would define it as related to a male who is portraying himself as wanting an exclusive long term relationship. But in reality, he is only out for some sex and will be trying to do the same thing to multiple women at once without the others knowing about it. It seems that a player is undesirable from a woman's viewpoint. I think the possibility exists for there to be a woman player, but I have not heard of one or have come across one. If you find one in the Detroit area, let me know!

So, is a player someone who is doing it intentional or non-intentionally. There may be both out there. Let me explain. Even though I am not a player, I have been accused of being one! How funny. If you are familiar with Internet dating, you know that at first, you will be talking with several people via e-mail and then going on a first date to see if it warrants further dates. Eventually, you will want to date just one person and cut the others off. This is somewhat the normal progression of the Internet dating process. This is the point at which players are made, born, or turned into one. Let us examine the intentional player first and see how this person might behave and what they are doing.

The intentional player is usually a "hunter". Another term I came across in Internet dating and a subject of another article I will write. Basically a hunter is someone who tries to contact as many women as possible and sees who bites. The player is going after people for looks or after some feature(s) that are desirable for them. They will always say that they are not dating anyone else and not in a relationship. They can be very crafty and deceiving. I think I should mention here, that some players are not single. They might be in a committed relationship or even married. Their profiles will be great of course, and they will write and say all the correct things. Be very charismatic, and seem like Mr. Perfect. The player may be lying or fibbing about his credentials in order to seem more attractive to date. For example, he may not be telling the truth about the amount of money he makes, his career, hobbies, things he likes to do, past relationships, etc. All, in order to get you to date him to eventually get into a sexual relationship. He will be very suave, and may try to get you into bed the first date if you allow it or within the next few dates. It seems that women are very susceptible in the first few dates, because they want to meet a great guy, and get swept away with what may seem like Mr. Right. The player will definitely take advantage of this. In a future article, I will talk about how to spot a player.

Let us now examine a non-intentional type player. It is someone whose intentions are noble, but end up being a type of a player non-intentionally. Let go through a possible scenario. Like I mentioned earlier, at first, a person will be chatting with several people and date several people. Many dates will not get past the first one. But, there will be a second date with someone eventually and possibly a relationship. Let us imagine that we have a person who is on a third date with someone, and sex happens on this date. What is next? Well, normally, the people will either stop talking with other people on-line that they are in process with and will not date anyone else. They will continue dating the individual they want a relationship with. This is how everyone hopes it will work. Now, let say that they have dated several weeks now, and the initial excitement of the relationship is wearing off. Also, some alarms are starting to show. Maybe, kids are involved, and you have met them and they are out of control. Or, an ex starts to surface and is psycho. Or, financial issues may surface. Now, let us say not everyone is perfect and these items I mentioned are not real bad. If they are bad in severity, run for the hills! But, if they seem like they can be tolerated and not enough of a problem to get rid of the person now. But, you want to continue the relationship a little longer to see how things pan out. Then comes along an e-mail or a phone call from someone you were talking with on-line earlier and never dated. You end up conversing with them, and they ask you out on a date. What do you do? Well, if you go out with them because you are curious and somewhat interested, the current relationship is questionable and then this is a scenario that you could end up in a player type scenario.

Now there are many types of scenarios and processes that intentional and non-intentional players are part of and use, but this is only intended to explain the concepts and introduce what a player may be like.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

2007 © Associated Content, All rights reserved.
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/179532/what_is_a_player_in_internet_dating.html
 southernlass
Joined: 5/2/2006
Msg: 329
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/14/2007 12:25:59 AM
And here's a couple more interesting little ditties warning those who might encounter "the player."
--------------------------------

How to Detect a Dating Player
Learn to Decipher the Code of Players
By Teresa Opdycke

A player or gamer is someone who uses romance and various manipulations to get what he/she wants when they want it. For men this is usually sex and for women, sometimes called playettes, it could be anything from sex to diamonds. It may be a protective layer that isn't ready to be open to the possibilities of a relationship or it may be a way to get a kick out of how far they can go before the jig is up or maybe they just want to put another notch on the belt of sexual encounters. Regardless of the underlying reason why someone plays games, if the smell of fire is apparent, get out before the house burns down.

The Case of the Married but Looking
If you're single and out there in any way you may well come across this notorious gamer. The merry frolic is this… blissfully wedded is not in the language of this game player, however, not ready to toss in the towel, the married but looking takes to the streets to find someone gullible and/or needy enough to allow themselves to be taken in by the ruse. The game usually begins with "hide the ring in the pocket" so there's no physical evidence of a signed license hiding in an iron box tucked away. The game really begins when the conversation and dating begins. Sure signs that your partner in this relationship is married: Asks for your phone number but won't reciprocate. Now some people don't think twice about this because they would just as soon be called rather than do the calling. Moving on… Only calls you during the week between the hours of 9-5. What's going on the other 16 hours of the day? You'll never see the inside of the gamer's home. No way, no how, ain't gonna happen. It's your place or no place. While driving down the street you suddenly find your head on the seat with a hand holding it down. Yes, my friend, this really happens. An acquaintance happened by and you are not to be seen.

The good thing about the married but looking player is you'll soon figure it out and a confrontation will occur. You'll hear the stories of being unloved and misunderstood. You'll be told that sex is non-existent in the life of the married but looking. Explanations of how testing the waters are important before an ultimate decision is made will flow. Poppycock! Now is the time to say a firm goodbye and boot the misunderstood tush to the curb. Change the locks and head out to discover the next gamer.

The Case of the Lookin' for Love Gamer
Most people in this world are looking for love unless they've all ready found it. You're probably looking for love and hoping to find it. FYI, most gamers are lookin' for love, all right, but not for a lifetime, not even for a week. They're lookin' for love tonight. This gamer will hang on your every word. Tell you how wonderful you are, notice the glint in your eyes, the way you move, sexy, like a sleek cat. A shower of praises will wash over you and you may find yourself basking in the sensual magnetism of the person sitting next to you. As much as we all love to be told how adorable we are, how well do you really know this person? Are you hearing cold hard facts? Are you being engaged in honest to goodness conversation about life? If the answer is no, you must scurry out the door and do not look back.

Case of the I'm Too Sexy for My Car Gamer
Yikes! Oozing sex from every pore in the body, this player is all about the me. Every sentence starts with "I" as the aloof sex god or goddess checks out their manicure, flipping hair and leaning over to reveal cleavage or a shirt unbuttoned to reveal more chest than necessary. This is a player that's always teasing but too high on a pedestal of their own making to actually be touched. Don't bother trying to discuss the headlines of the day; they only watch Style and E! to find out what the latest fashions are. When it's time to leave, a laugh escapes as they check themselves out in the window before sidling into a car that just isn't enough for them. The problem arises when you find yourself taken in by their very handsome beauty with thoughts like, "Wow this gorgeous man/woman finds ME interesting!" Stop! Look! Listen! Be certain before taking the next step that it's actual interest and not an ulterior motive that drives them toward you.

Case of the I'll Trample Your Heart Gamer
This is the absolute worst gamer of all. This one leads you into a sense of false security with promises and double talk. You sit enraptured as tales of romantic evenings to be waft your way from a silken tongue. It's always next week we'll… but when next weeks arrives a thousand excuses pour from the soul of this game player. At first, you believe because the sincerity and integrity displayed seems real. With soulful eyes and unwavering words this gamer fills your head with all the sweet nothings you've always wanted to hear. Knowing what to say, how to say it and when to say it is a pivotal part of the game plan. How could you not believe this trusting, compassionate person? Without warning it all comes to an end. Usually it's the gamer who moves on without a word or because the love is too great to stand. Hogwash and bullshit! The game ends for whatever reason, but the gamer comes out smelling like a rose and you're left holding the thorns of a stem that stabs right into the heart.

A few quick notes on how to break open the code in the first meeting:
1.If it's too good to be true, it probably isn't. If your first thoughts are "WOW" this is an amazing person who's unbelievably wonderful! You can bet your Jimmy Choos that you've been whipped into a frenzy by a master player. Stay awhile and find out more, but have the radar stoked and ready especially if your hearing all kinds of marvelous, out of the ordinary things like, "I've never met anyone quite like you" of course this is after an entire 5 minutes of sipping wine together.
2.Listen to your inner voice. It's a puzzle you can't quite solve; a nagging feeling that won't go away. If you just don't feel comfortable, make your excuses and walk away with haste.
3.Some game players are so obvious that for anyone to be fooled would be a ridiculous notion. No matter how charming, beautiful, or rich they appear to be, don't give in to the temptation that they might come around to asking about you. They probably won't.
4.If you find yourself doing all the giving and the other party the taking, hie ye out of the state your in immediately.
5.Stay out of the denial zone. You cannot deny what you see, hear, or feel nor can you change someone. Don't even go there.
6.If there is no intimacy in the relationship beyond sex, you're in a players clutches. They do know all the right things to say and they do have the moves down pat, but no one wants to be part of a couple that is actually something more… more people involved with the player.

The bottom line is that, sometimes, we allow ourselves to be taken in by people who are more into playing games than seeking out "the one". The gamer may play a cool, sweep you off your feet hand or the compassionate, I feel for the world game. There are as many tools in the gamer's toolbox as there are stars in the sky. Just don't let YOU be taken in the next time you're out playing the field.
2007 © Associated Content, All rights reserved.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Are You Dating a Player?

Author: Cherie Burbach
Published: July 17, 2007

Before you fall too head over heals for your new love, you may want to first find out if they're going to be able to give you the kind of relationship you need.
If you feel they are a bit emotionally distant or perhaps even lying to you, take a look at the following signs to see if you may be dating a player.

You Feel Something Is Missing From Your Relationship

It seems that the two of you are happy together. You have a great time and he or she really makes you smile. But there’s just “something” about the situation that doesn’t meet your emotional needs. When you want to talk about your day they don’t care to hear it. When you bring up a genuine concern about your relationship they make a joke of it or simply brush it off. You don't suspect them of cheating, but still, there's something that's just not quite right.

They Have a Hard Time Making Plans

Your new partner may be great with last minute requests to see you, but when you try and pin them down for a future date, they balk. Players hate making plans because they feel something better may come along. They may hesitate to give you an answer until they get closer to the date and can safely say they have nothing better going on. Or, they simply refuse to commit and leave you hanging until the last possible minute. They may show up and save the day, or remain MIA and disappoint you.

Lots of People Seem to Know Them Well

Players leave a trail of people behind them. Sometimes these folks can’t get the hint and try and hook up with your partner again, or sometimes they’ve been burned so bad they immediately become angry upon seeing your partner. Your partner may fail to introduce these folks, but even if he or she does they may ignore you or treat you poorly. If your new love seems to know a lot of "friends," and they’re all of the opposite sex, take note.

You Don’t Share Major Life Moments

You suggest your partner accompany you to meet your cousins at the next family get-together, and they turn up their nose. You ask them to accompany you to a friend’s wedding, and they refuse or they go and behave bored or uninterested the entire night. It’s not only your special moments they don’t care to share, they also fail to let you in on their major life events. For example, they may fail to tell you they’ll be gone for a week on business or prefer to go to their parent’s anniversary party alone.

They Don’t Want to Talk About Your Relationship

Communication is key when you’re a couple. Plain and simple, you need to talk about things to work them out. When you’ve met the right one, you both want to work on the relationship. It doesn’t have to be as dramatic as having a knock down, drag out discussion, but you do have to talk on some level. Issues that remain silent grow over time, and if your significant other simply refuses to address the problems you two seem to have, it may be because they simply aren’t interested.

Simple, Kind Gestures All Seem to Come From You

Kindness goes a long way in a relationship. It’s the easy, thoughtful gestures that mean the most. Doing sweet little favors or buying small presents that mean a lot to your partner shows that you care about them and are paying attention. If you’re the only one that seems to be making dinner, giving small gifts, or remembering special moments you two have shared, it may be a sign that your partner is not as interested in you as you are in them.

You Have No Space in Their World

You have to carry a bag of your essentials around town because your partner has no extra room in their drawer for you. Or perhaps you want a key to your mate’s place to make it easier for you both to hook up, yet your partner balks at this idea. If your man or woman can’t make literal space in their life for you, it may mean they don’t have the emotional space for you either. Emotionally unavailable also means unable to commit. And why waste your time with that when there are so many great people in the world who would love to meet you.

 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 331
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/14/2007 9:00:23 PM
Surprise, Surprise.....to you jokers and liars.....There are some people who do not lie or mislead people. People who are honest, upfront and treat others with respect. It just seems they are getting harder to find nowadays.

Lots have brain washed themselves, saying heck EVERYONE DOES IT, so that excuses my lying, cheating, adulators ars. That's just not true.

Seems some need to look in their own closets and do some house cleaning and quit making excuses for their behavior. If you have ever mislead someone, Allowed someone to think you think more of them than you do, as far as commitment, used someone for your benefit, deceitfully, taken advantage of someone through lies, then you need to look at your own morals and intregrety and quit saying, Hell if they had not been so gullible, it would not have happened to them.

If your living your life that way, be a big enough person to stand up and say.......I HAVE NO CONCIOUS, MORALS OR INTREGRETY........because some day, someone is going to call you on it and you will be the one paying for your past behavior.

It's not a pretty badge to be wearing or waving. It speaks of your lack of CHARACTOR.
 svj
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 332
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/20/2007 8:36:12 PM
^^^ You know... for someone that's always going on about "honesty", I find it amusing that your profile says you're looking for "friends", but then go on to describe in your write up what you want in a "loving, complete relationship".

Seems a little "misleading", doesn't it?
 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 333
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/20/2007 9:55:34 PM
^^^^If you read my profile.....I clarified that in my last sentences......I said THAT WAS WHAT I WAS SEEKING, but have figured out, I'm most likely not going to find that on an Internet dating site.......but wish other luck in their search. Yes, my optimism with Internet dating has diminished. Guess it's the experiences I have had with it or the men I have had the occasion to cross paths with.......they certainly changed my mind.

I've been sexually attacked by a so called professional insurance company owner, womanizer.

I've been groped on a first date, by a loudly professed Christian.

I've been lied to and mislead by so called professional business men, too many to keep track of.

Chased by youngsters the age of my son.

Met my share of perverts, cyber sex addicts, Masters, homeless and unemployed men, looking for someone to put a roof over their head.

And approached by more married men than I care to recall and lied to by most of them concerning their marital status.

I'm in a holding pattern, trying to regain some faith in man kind at this time. Do you mind??????
 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 334
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/20/2007 10:11:28 PM
laughing....it was in the screening that the truth came to the surface. I did not say I was involved with any of these jokers. I just ask a lot of questions but the two slipped by because they were such masters at their game.

Don't get me wrong, I have met some great folks, guys and gals via the internet, just I'm not into women and the nice guys were younger than would be an acceptable relationship....for me that is. Or distance and life circumstances, did not allow the friend ship to develop beyond good friends.

I really don't think men realize how bad of examples, some men on the internet, set for your sex as a whole. You really have no concept. Decent guys don't think like some out here do and the bad apples make it hard for the decent guys.
 svj
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 336
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/20/2007 11:51:39 PM
^^^ You know... for someone that's always going on about "honesty", I find it amusing that your profile says you're looking for "friends", but then go on to describe in your write up what you want in a "loving, complete relationship".

Seems a little "misleading", doesn't it?

If you read my profile.....I clarified that in my last sentences......I said THAT WAS WHAT I WAS SEEKING, but have figured out, I'm most likely not going to find that on an Internet dating site.......but wish other luck in their search.


Gee... are you saying that it's possible that I was mis-interpreting the signals you were sending?
That you're not really trying to decieve or lie to me?
That the whole thing might be a result of miscommunication?

I guess it might not be all your fault after all.
Maybe my interpretations had something to do with creating my problem.
Maybe I was so busy making your words fit my own expectations, that I din't actually try to understand your point of view.

Maybe it's unfair of me to paint everyone who puts "Friends", but talks about her ideal relationship with the same brush.
Maybe everyone is different, and needs to be judged on their own merits and shortcomings.


^^ This little guy is a good friend of mine. His name is Deliciously Ironic Parallel. Say "hello."
 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 337
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/21/2007 12:28:34 AM
svj......interpret it anyway you wish.....makes me no difference at all. I didn't invite you to look at my profile, so I could care less.

And no guys, like I said I've met some super nice folks on the internet, but in the beginning I do have to admit I was a bit naive. Contrary to what you imply, not everyone plays games with people. Some are stand up, honest people. What you see is what you get.


you've got such an overt hatred of men it's beyond palpable


Sorry to disagree with you..........it's just SOME TYPES OF MEN I DISLIKE......if you have noticed, I've never warmed up to you.


Listen...everybody plays...he11, you're playing with every word you speak. Does dumping the sins of your past mistakes on everybody else make you feel better? Are you a self-appointed cop? Whisper~, we get it...you've been burned several times...perhaps you're a magnet for them (some women are), perhaps you just don't know how to spot it and stop it.


I don't agree with your statement......No not everyone plays games......I've been blessed to know some very honorable men in my life and I certainly set them apart from the gamers in respect. Just because I have been contacted by someone and I gave them the courtesy of getting to know them better does not make it a mistake or a sin, on my part.....thats what the getting to know you is all about, BUT when they show me who they truly are, those are the flags we all look for.

I've not been burned, disappointed yes, but not at my personal expense, just disappointed at the lack of level of decency today. Don't jump to conclusions in regard to things you don't know for fact.....I do know how to spot it and stop it......just very disappointed in the quality available in my age range....
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 338
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/21/2007 8:09:12 AM

I've not been burned, disappointed yes, but not at my personal expense, just disappointed at the lack of level of decency today. Don't jump to conclusions in regard to things you don't know for fact.....I do know how to spot it and stop it......just very disappointed in the quality available in my age range....


I call this back pedaling.
 svj
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 340
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/21/2007 9:02:12 AM
svj......interpret it anyway you wish.....makes me no difference at all. I didn't invite you to look at my profile, so I could care less.

I can see you don't speak the same language as my little friend "Deliciously Ironic Parallel".
Ah well... some things were never meant to be.


Melofelo: Although I don't accept that most people "just know" anything. I sure don't. Most people feel they "just know" what "unpatriotic" is. While everyone has a different definition of just what "unpatriotic" is, what they usually mean is "a political belief or action I don't approve of". Myself included, I assume.

With that said:
What I've come to accept about this thread is that a "player" is any man, who is secure enough in himself, to have a clear idea of what he wants, confidence that he will find it, and is unwilling to enter into a relationship where the terms are dictated to him in a way that he surrenders all control of the relationship process to the woman's whims and notions, and he's "shallow", if he doesn't immediately enter into a "relationship process" with the first woman, who displays interest. Of course, he would be a "player" were he to exit such a relationship, prior to the woman's desire that he leave. Should she so desire, it would be entirely because of what's "wrong with him".

As it applies to women that whinge and complain that all they are surrounded by "players", and the only interest men have is the contents of their pants... I think that definition is balls-on accurate.

 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 344
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/21/2007 8:23:53 PM

A true player wouldn't be here on an internet dating site trolling the forums.


Ha. You would be in a bar by now? What if you get your chics not in bars but atheletic events. Which means you go to bed rather early. And are playing in the AM. Hmmm. There are many types, many places. Ha.
 fyahman
Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 347
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/22/2007 10:29:19 AM
.........................................................................................................................................................player rule #1 never reveal any player rules. lol
 svj
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 348
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/22/2007 12:15:23 PM
I find this thread very interesting.

You can pretty much tell by the tone of speech how attractive the opposite sex generally finds the poster. Assuming a post longer than a one-liner.

And even some of them. JRydel, for instance. Been awhile, huh buddy?



"First rule of Fight Club. Never talk about Fight Club."
 chrylann
Joined: 12/8/2007
Msg: 350
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/22/2007 6:47:30 PM
m church, how do you know a woman feels happy and loved when being used? Did one actually tell you this, or does it make you feel better to believe that nonsense? I can tell you from experience, we do not feel happy, nor loved about being played/used.
 chrylann
Joined: 12/8/2007
Msg: 351
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/22/2007 8:00:14 PM
Guess, I agree with Jrydel in most of what he said. And to the poster who said M church is of church and is honest. Maybe I misunderstand what you mean of church, but his profile says hes nonreligious.
 exrescue
Joined: 10/24/2007
Msg: 357
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 12/29/2007 2:52:43 AM
The point here is?
 Katietxgirl
Joined: 11/19/2007
Msg: 362
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 7/27/2008 7:19:08 PM
I know a man whose a huge player. He has always been one, as far as I know. The crazy thing is that he treats women like crap, and they keep coming back for more. He will make plans with a woman and just not show up, then give them some crap about something came up. Those of us who know him know what came up - another woman. He will tell women he will call them back in 15 min and won't call them back til the next day. He'll say his phone went dead or something like that. He has even had girlfriends who have caught him with other women. He tells them something like it didn't mean anything, and they still go out with him. It's amazing. I am often amazed that he always has another woman waiting. Now, he is a good-looking guy and very charming, so maybe that's the reason.
 vivaciousvixen2
Joined: 3/1/2008
Msg: 365
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 7/27/2008 7:40:13 PM
EWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEE
And I let myself be vulnerable and
T R U S T
him
I was played MAJORRRRRRRRRtime
I had a feeling that he was not being sincere because he wasn't acted as if he was committed
but did want everything about SEX

The man posts God in as "an interest"
and calls himself "a Baptist"

looking for long term

but he is he using women's faith in Christ to get in our panties.
He is the LoWEst ScUm that There IS
JESUS SEES ALL
 VaFishnetstockings4u
Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 367
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 7/27/2008 8:01:22 PM
My definition of a player is someone with no heart or morals and someone with no
feelings that is afraid of the C word commit. Honestly I don't have a clue what is it
to play or be a player cause I only like posssitive in my life and I choose to live
life that way.

So they play this game and put on an
act just to see how far they can go with someones feelings. They lie and say what
you want to hear only they are messing with someones mind and thrive on this to
get what they want be it sex or whatever they have no morals or values and can care
less who they hurt in the process.

It's like a game of chess with all the pieces the player
plays at his pawns in hopes of getting check mate and will stand at nothing to get what
he wants to forge ahead in this lonely low life game that is played.

They only want
fun and games great sex no emotional feelings or connections at all they are afraid
to show real affection cause they are so busy living in a fantasy world where their
prey falls to this play that the player intends on acting what a stage production it
is and in the end hearts are broken , feelings get hurt and then you sit back and
wonder is it all just a game in this singles world.

No it's not , cause everyone in this
world is not a player and you can avoid being played by standing firm to what you
want and never backing down. The player is nothing more than a bad actor plain
and simple not one that is very good at it , cause they fall and get caught all the time.
Players don't put a lot into there profiles they are very blank that is sign there don't you think ?

It's a big red flag that there page is not filled out and no photo means they
are hiding something.
If they talk of others woman or going out clubing there is,
another flag that the player is not a sincere person what so ever.
Will not be one thatis true to his word cause it's only a game to them and
we're the prey.

Player has many
forms of communicating and it's up to us not to fall under there spell. A player can
be anything online till he does have the balls to show his face and true colors. I've
been played before and well I learned a hard lesson and that is not to be so trusting
hold out for the best and not settle for anything less !

I have self esteam and I'm strong
I've over commed this and life goes on and that player when I run into one , I just say
no thanks and move on. I have no time for the players big theater production! I'm
not a player and nor will have any parts of one either , I try and look for all the signs
and not allow myself to be played.

TO ME A PLAYER IS JUST A BAD ACTOR

Good Post thank you to the Author
We have to learn to out smart the player and be better than them.
Yours,Brenny
 tooPhuckingHonest
Joined: 8/11/2008
Msg: 372
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 8/17/2008 8:50:05 AM
Don't blame the player

Blame the game
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 375
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 10/17/2008 1:00:01 AM
Msg1 ... In my case none of the above ,scenario>> The guy finds the lady very attractive and he wants to get inside her Victoria's Secret ,for a few dates and the lady thinks he is not a bad catch but she wants to know him more and to get in to his heart so they are playing a hypothetical game of chess a mental game , the lady's moves is how to mate the king. And the guys moves is to mate the queen... Hmm,daisypetals is not honest name is it????
 kimberly61
Joined: 8/30/2008
Msg: 378
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Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 3/30/2009 7:26:40 AM
What is is like to play? I am not sure because I am not a player but I have been played. I have read heaps of threads on here trying to work out I suppose what people consider to be a player in an attempt to not get sucked in by yet another one. This is my experience and personal view....a player is a person who is simply not honest, or not upfront about their intentions. A player will go to a great deal of trouble to convince you they are in fact not a player, will often represent themselves as a victim of other players, will talk about their virtues and honesty, display a great deal of interest in you which is super flattering, enough of it and it becomes intoxicating..... once intoxicated you are off balance and off guard, then they go in for the kill. Once caught and consumed you are then discarded..... To all of those who have come up with the excuse that they were simply not into the person and they are not players just guys taking what was offered.....WOMEN RARELY GIVE IT UP UNLESS THEY ARE INTO THE GUY......and the time to work out you are not into that woman is BEFORE you sleep with them
 e*Musing
Joined: 10/23/2008
Msg: 379
Players! What is it like to play? C'mon be honest!
Posted: 3/30/2009 7:49:20 AM
Let's think of this a bit differently, Kimberly~ (and BTW, as I just reopened my account a few months ago, my previous ID was EAZK as seen in previous posts). Think about what happens when you go out to buy a used car. First off, there are a number of bad jokes about used car salesmen.

So, you go out, you're a bit wary...but the guy seems honest, respectable, etc....and eventually helps you decide to buy the car. It's great...you're happy...the world is fun again. Then the car starts to do things you don't quite understand. OK...if you've been burned before, your first thought is going to be "That lousy, no-good, double-talking salesman" (translation to dating..."that player").

But the truth is, women (primarily) use the term "player" to assign blame and to attempt to defend why they opted to be a willing participant in the drop-the-panties game. The bigger truth is, a true player doesn't need to hide it (m_church puts it very well, a true player can wear a t-shirt with it written in fluorescent orange and still walk out with the woman of his choice). True players are open and honest about their intentions. The difference is they definitely provide a far better fun and value-proposition basis for the woman to interact with. They know how to communicate, to have fun, to take the lead, to be both interesting AND interested, to be focus, to be consistent, etc., etc.. True players have no reason to leave women broken and wounded...the truth is, they genuinely like and respect women and simply want the women to enjoy the interaction as much as they themselves enjoy. And in the end, the true player is simply trying to find the woman that best matches his persona and has the emotional integrity to be real about it.

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