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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > yes or no? Friends with benefits!      Home login  
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 Double Cabin
Joined: 11/29/2004
Msg: 101
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!Page 5 of 47    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
We are all different and as consenting adults something might work better for you than others. I want longterm/life long monogamy, but I'm also a man of immediate desire. Effective understandings are articulately defined. Leaving grey areas is counterproductive.
 madamdria
Joined: 2/1/2006
Msg: 102
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 8/20/2006 12:05:14 PM
Yes, I dont have one now, but I'm lookin.
 FrozenLuv
Joined: 2/12/2006
Msg: 103
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 8/20/2006 8:40:31 PM
Sure being able to be involved with different kinds of people would be neat and would be very different and unboring but it's not for me. I like the concept of one man and one woman. I think it's not only based on morals/values etc but I think it would just be way easier to have one partner. Only one person to have good and bad times with and no worries about if a child came into the picture etc.... just easier and decent.
 jay_beck13082
Joined: 7/7/2006
Msg: 104
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 9/5/2006 6:22:16 AM
well I am also looking and my job takes me all over central new york and northern pennsylvania... i hope there are others like myself looking for more?
 pebbles_2006
Joined: 7/19/2006
Msg: 105
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 9/5/2006 8:16:35 AM
Well there is a benefit to that bec you dont have any hang ups later on just in case, it doesnt work... its more like Casual Sex Partner...

But for now, friends with benefits will be convenient for anyone who is not ready for anything committed.....But just make sure u have a rule that its basically a monogamous sexual partnership between the two of u or just let the other partner know if u are with another man or he is intimate with another woman....

 pebbles_2006
Joined: 7/19/2006
Msg: 106
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 9/5/2006 9:41:17 AM
so true, but u have to make things clear with each other before u make this official so there is no way that someone would get hurt or get used.... or it would change your friendship towards each other....

I know it complicates things bec some ppl get attached to the other person even if its made clear that there's no strings attached.... But everyone enjoys Sex & the only thing is you just have to communicate to the other person what u want & what he wants so basically see if u are in the same wave length.

 sweetmama451960
Joined: 10/4/2006
Msg: 107
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 10/21/2006 7:46:39 AM
been there, done that, and it was great for the time.......until I met Mr. Wonderful and had to stop the benifits although we are still friends......

I met someone and we started dating....we were both afraid to get into a commited realtionship and we decided to just be frineds....sit and watch movies, go for coffee, say hi on the streets but no bf/gf kinda stuff and we were able to see someone else if we so wished.......

One night we were watching a movie and things happened......we kept it as a friend realtionship..."no holds barred, see other pople,......

we did this for over a year.....my daughter was ok with it because as far as she was concerned we were only friends and we didn't show anything in public...we were just friends....

The time with him was GREAT....the sex was great....and when we were together there was alot of passion and romance and did not feel like "just there for the sex"....it was wonderful when we were together....

There was one draw back...when I needed someone JUST to talk to he wasn't there me, when I needed a HUG after a bad day, he wasn't there for me, when I saw him on the street and wanted to just say hi he wasn't there me ( afraid of small town gossip)......I started to feel i wanted more,,,,,but the funny thing was....not with him......

I was dealing with a lot of issues at the time and he hleped me over come alot of them.....I would jokenly tell him "some man will wanna thank you one day"......

When I did find someone special and decided to stop thei"benifits" he was kind of shocked and surprised and it was him who didn't want to let go.....matter of fact he still calls me from time to time to see if I am still seeing this other guy and that he is there if I want him.....It was his idea in the first place to do this and I agreed and we both felt more comforatble with this agreement......

Not to sound insentive or anything because the time I spent with him was great for me; he was another path along my "healing journey" and I hit another fork in the road and chose to take another direction.......to be with someone who actually cares for me for who I am and who accepts me and my children and we have more than just benifits....we have feelings for each other......

But the "friend with benifits" was GREAT while it lasted.....every one comes in your life for a reason and his was to prepare me for Mr. Wonderful that came along and into my life......
 makin memories
Joined: 2/25/2006
Msg: 108
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 10/23/2006 6:05:06 PM
Yes,Yes,Yes not only ordinary friends with benifits but best friends.No expectations no let downs thats my motto.I love a man who can lay his cards on the table and be honest....I am a free spirit and enjoy other people that can feel this way.It's nice to have your own space and share it when you want to with whom ever you desire.Only free spirited people will probably understand the need to fly!!!
 Stargazer46
Joined: 1/18/2006
Msg: 109
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 10/27/2006 1:10:25 PM
An exercise program is a stress buster. Walk, weight train, row, cycle, and/or run and enjoy the short term endorphin rush. Not to mention the long term (lower weight, blood pressure, cholesterol, blood sugar, and who doesn't know that this is just to name a few?) health benefits. Want to do something good for your head? The last time i checked, the number of kids growing up in poverty and/or neglect was not a pretty one. Why not help with the next community service program out there meant to increase a child's chances to grow up and become a healthier happier member of the world you both share? And i can't imagine that every senior citizen living home alone or in a nursing home enjoys the small things like someone to help rake his leaves if he can no longer do yardwork or read to him if he can no longer see well enough to indluge in the relative luxury of reading a book for pleasure. Self-fulfillment begins with making some kind of positive difference for someone else.
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 110
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 1/1/2007 11:46:00 AM
I'd have to say no. I cannot imagine just being someone's release valve nor am I that hard up that I would use someone without worrying about their emotions.
 SINCERITYSWEETNESS
Joined: 8/4/2005
Msg: 111
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 1/1/2007 6:35:41 PM
WOW

the friends with benefits or "booty call"

i definately miss mine

i had a guy a few years back we were at each others call as needed--we never got together if the other was in a "relationship" that was respectful. we met each others needs over a few years time usually got together once a week the best set up anyone could want
and the sex was awesome
 krazyxexykewl
Joined: 10/18/2006
Msg: 112
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 1/2/2007 7:30:09 PM
OH CAN YOU GIVE ME A HELLL YAA!! why not? its fun..never boring...and when it does become old .... CIAO BABy!! was nice sleeping with ya...

and I dont have to look at your face everyday....talk to you everyday.... play with you everyday.... ... i dont see any negatives...do you?

 marmott
Joined: 9/30/2006
Msg: 113
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 1/6/2007 11:54:38 AM
Sex / intimacy, is something shared (hopefully) between people who have a respect for each other, to enjoy each others company and hopefully actually give a crap.


I think that if I can be with someone who is a friend (maybe best of friends), being involved with a chosen partner is something that could turn into anything.


I can’t tell the future, but if I can be "with" another person and have great communication, and honesty, and respect for themselves and so do I. It sure means a lot to me.

I think the lines get crossed, when there are ulterior motives, not saying what is going on, or trying to control or manipulate the situation, rather than being present or honouring yourself or others feeling, values, or choices.

Yes or NO?
Maybe it should read, would you share yourself with someone who you don’t like and lie with to someone you despise?

Ultimately would it be self-abuse, and abuse to the other, to lie in intimacy!
So there would not be any friendship or benefits?

Just to be honest definetly goes a long way.

 ChristianKristen
Joined: 8/3/2006
Msg: 115
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 1/31/2007 5:00:37 PM
Can't do it.............I get feelings and then if we wind up having a relationship and it dosn't work out then your not friends anymore, so one or the other.
 aquashell
Joined: 1/16/2007
Msg: 118
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 2/1/2007 6:26:49 PM
Well I'm with you about the toy thing for sure toys over friends.The friends with benefits puzzles me as much as ghosts and ailens.LOL guess I'm old school!! I still think that it would be hard for both partys to hold the same feeling. In all the ones that Ive heard about one of them wanted more. Besides all people don't have that with the same sex friends do they? Why do differnt sex friends get all the benefits? LOL
 Suikoden
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 119
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 2/7/2007 11:11:45 PM
I belive in it to some point and I understand what everyone is saying here but one thing that makes me angry is a women who says sh*& like this "If I was that hard up there are toys that could get a girl off faster, and without all the drama". you know whats funny men can to its called imagination and Mrs Thumb and her four Daughters....
 molly__blooming
Joined: 4/6/2006
Msg: 120
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 2/8/2007 8:39:38 PM
"no" -- just can't go there.
 Suikoden
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 121
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:06:11 AM
Sexual thing no strings attached just friends being there for each other in the dry spell times if your new to this thred....
 colt8301
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 122
yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 2/9/2007 4:15:03 AM
I rather be just a lover. if i am going to have a no strings attached relationship, I do not need the friendship neither. Friendship is a relationship, after sex just get the hell out, friends with benefits is just something that will get complicated after a while.
 Suikoden
Joined: 3/22/2006
Msg: 123
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:28:27 PM
The whole moral of this thred is gitting blown way out of its orignal question so lets just add a few facts here.

1: FWB is not for everyone!
2: If your not the FWB Person then don't write such stupid things about how you will never do it, Read number 1 for more info!
3: Lets get a life here and write about something more interesting like Pickles or something!
4: this thred has draged along for far too long!
5: Have a nice day!
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 124
yes or no? Friends with benefits! (very longish)
Posted: 2/16/2007 1:19:07 PM

Lots of people say it is meaningless and useing people and a bunch of other nagative crap.

WRONG...

Friends... with benifits.

Friends first. You already like this person, have respect and trust for this person. You already hang out and do other things and enjoy spending time with them. F^ck buddies are just for sex.

So in the spirit of friendship you already have an interest in not hurting them or abuseing them. Yes sometimes more feelings come about and it is a good thing... sometimes it is not.

Provided the friend with benifits does not become just a F^ck buddy there is only a better friendship to be gained. I have never had a bad experiance having a friend with benifits. I have had F^ck Buddies and they are usually short lived and can be stressful as there is no friendship there and it is just for convenience.

Most of my relationships seem to start off as friends anyway since I like to get to know someone before I get too carried away with them. So really, every relationship at some point... is friends with benifits.

Exactly. If you are someone that can't do this, then by all means don't. But what it is and how it works is different with each situation...so you can't generalize or judge a thing you can't do or don't have much experience with. Live and let live. Do what works for you.
 mystlw
Joined: 9/19/2005
Msg: 125
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yes or no? Friends with benefits!
Posted: 2/16/2007 10:22:59 PM
the excitment of being with someone you do not know for the first time , always makes for great sex .


You would be referring to a f*ck buddy,or something similar. It also makes for the transmission of STDs. But hey, whatever floats your boat. Some people are into deep, ulcerative sores.
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