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 abacusblack
Joined: 5/16/2009
Msg: 44
Powerful woman.....Page 4 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Another Beer? Yes Dear , Coming right up!
 debra2008
Joined: 1/27/2008
Msg: 45
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 6/6/2009 9:49:43 PM
I am sorry... it just seems that the posts from the women are a case of "protesteth too much". I wonder just how centred and powerful we are in the sisterhood when it seems to mean so much to us to tout our centredness and power?

Be kind - this is introspective - I've known the words to Helen Reddy's song since I was twelve or thirteen and can sing it all perfectly today! In fact it is on my man hating CD that my best friend made for me...along with the Dixie Chicks (?) Wanda and MaryAnne fave - I've only played the heck out of it - currently scratched and tea-spilled but it still gets into the cd player ! It is THAT soothing!
 Mobiledj
Joined: 6/14/2007
Msg: 46
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Powerful woman.....
Posted: 6/6/2009 10:01:00 PM
Nothing wrong with a stong women ... they will be the ones that go for what they want and not wait for what will come to them if you know what I mean.
 debra2008
Joined: 1/27/2008
Msg: 47
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 6/6/2009 10:06:03 PM
No - what do you mean?
 Phuqd
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 48
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 6/6/2009 10:19:48 PM
Here I was thinking thinking we had a topic going about female super powers.
I mean like Catwoman, Storm or Rogue from the X-men. Maybe they should be X-people? Another thread I suppose.
But really, we all know that She-Ra is the princess of power.


She Ra is known as the Princess of Power. As such, she has superhuman strength and is highly resistant to damage. She also possesses superhuman speed and agility, a healing touch, as well as the ability to speak with animals telepathically. All her powers derive from the mystical Power of Grayskull. She also weilds a Sword of Protection

-http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/She-Ra
Masters of the Universe. Check it out.
 LadyDelilah
Joined: 2/24/2009
Msg: 49
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 6/7/2009 11:23:20 AM
The most powerful woman I ever knew didnt raise her voice often, had a limited education, never wore a business suit nor and had little money.
She exuded confidence and she based her actions on what was right, not popular, if something needed to be said she said it with kindness and empathy. All of her actions were based on giving of herself to others, not on what she could get.
She was the one that so many people came to advice for, and she usually didnt give it, she just listened.
When she died, her family was amazed at the number of people who attended her service and the lives she touched. That is true power in my humble opinion
If I could be just 1/2 the woman she was I would die a happy lady
 WesternWildRose
Joined: 9/15/2008
Msg: 50
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Powerful woman.....
Posted: 6/7/2009 12:06:44 PM
Define 'Powerful'

We talking assertive in business?......
Agressive in life, relationships in general.... power hungry...controlling?
Financially successful women with more earnings than their mate?

I know many women who are very powerful in the business world....and yes, they do 'Keep' their husbands and the men enjoy the perks.
I do think they feel resentful at times, for everyone in the know, knows that they are 'kept' men.

The same women are assertive....at time agressive in the workplace...but none of them that I know are agressive in their relationships, none of them domineering their men in public or in my pressence. If anything they take on a very traditional wifey role at home.

I see many different types of power.... having worked in politics for too many years I have seen women in positions of power....most of them are single.
I think they like to walk to their own beat of the drum and men are not able or willing to take a backseat or to share their passion for their jobs.
Career = Power....to them... they taste it....and they want more...it is their first love after a while..their priority.... a man would be a poor second or third.
 Mobiledj
Joined: 6/14/2007
Msg: 51
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Powerful woman.....
Posted: 6/7/2009 2:27:06 PM

No - what do you mean?


I am just saying strong people are go getters who are confident and go after what they want and what is not attractive about that?

If your not a strong person you sit back and take what is given to you.
 DAKOTATRUCKCOUNTRY
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 52
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 6/7/2009 11:26:46 PM
Let' s try this one again.

Confidence = Constructive behaviour, thinking and doing, while sharing with others.

Powerful, or having power = Destructive behaviour, thinking and NOT, sharing with others, except for ONLY ones self.

Example, Adolf Hitler was powerful, yet destructive, endangering the lives of many German People.

Saddam Hussien, was powerful, yet destructive, endangering the lives of manyIraqi People.

The Pope John Paul, was Confident, yet Constructive, while sharing with millions of people around the world.

BIG, HUGE, MAJOR DIFFERENCE, between being "Confident" , and being "Powerful".
 Free-At-Last
Joined: 7/15/2009
Msg: 53
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 1:10:29 AM
hmmmm...that reminds me...
I need to get my quills sharpened.
 Jeffrey Lebowski
Joined: 2/21/2009
Msg: 54
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 1:30:10 AM
Powerful = since when is powerful destructive? Martin Luther King John Lennon Marvin Gaye...all powerful in their time, yet same time flawed...all human...their power in the mark they made


I'm not sure if all these people would be defined as powerful (although perhaps to the poster). Influential and moving - yes. But other than Martin Luther King Jr, I don't think any of these are examples of powerful people. I mean, John Lennon and Marvin Gaye - give me a break.

Not every confident person is necessarily powerful - but all powerful people are, pretty much by definition, confident. In the new math speak, powerful is a subset of confident.

I forget who said it but:

"Power corrupts - Absolute power corrupts absolutely"

I will leave it at that.
 Jeffrey Lebowski
Joined: 2/21/2009
Msg: 55
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:04:41 AM

whaaaaaaaaat? not powerful? but influential and moving - and that's not power? what is then?


Obviously, by your definition it is - but if that's the case, then The Monkees or New Kids on the Block (influenced a lot of fabricated boy bands) and the inventor of "Crocs" (influenced a lot of people to where ugly footware) would be considered powerful.

Apologies on the misquote - but the message is the same. No lecture, no real point, other than power is not always the good quality some make it out to be.
 ritawayward
Joined: 4/17/2007
Msg: 56
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 5:45:22 AM
This woman would like to use her power of communication to ask that the bootlegger and her worse than ever companion post about the topic by directly answering the question in the OP and if that truly is as impossible as they are proving that they step back into the little jackets with the wraparound arms that they escaped from, until they can!

I notice men like power and find it sexy in themselves and women.
The only people (men and women) I have ever met who resent the power someone else has
are those who have very little, none or no clue that they have it too.
 Runs With Wolves
Joined: 1/19/2006
Msg: 57
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 9:50:34 AM

te]I know many women who are very powerful in the business world....and yes, they do 'Keep' their husbands and the men enjoy the perks. I do think they feel resentful at times, for everyone in the know, knows that they are 'kept' men.

How could one feel resentful if perks enjoyed? Could it be you feel resentful of kept men ? ( Joke-style credit to X).

The same women are assertive....at time agressive in the workplace...but none of them that I know are agressive in their relationships, none of them domineering their men in public or in my pressence.If anything they take on a very traditional wifey role at home.
I see many different types of power.... having worked in politics for too many years I have seen women in positions of power....most of them are single. I think they like to walk to their own beat of the drum and men are not able or willing to take a backseat or to share their passion for their jobs. Career = Power....to them... they taste it....and they want more...it is their first love after a while..their priority.... a man would be a poor second or third.


I don’t agree that the women you speak of view men as a poor second or third. You have acknowledged there are different types of power and yes the use of power has resulted in SOME being single. Could it be their use of power might be viewed as aggressive by potential mates? Or, there is such a disconnect that they don’t view others with their mind set? Thus the OP's quote:

"For insecure men, powerful women are like porcupines in a balloon farm. They pop egos just walking by.


Yes there is truth to this.

There has been some other research that applies to how the above quotes may be viewed …

Start of quote:

What is power? Ability to MOVE something, to have an effect on something.

Hard Power vs. Soft Power

"The basic concept of power is the ability to influence others to get them to do what you want. There are three major ways to do that: one is to threaten them with sticks; the second is to pay them with carrots; the third is to attract them or co-opt them, so that they want what you want. If you can get others to be attracted, to want what you want, it costs you much less in carrots and sticks."

"Hard and soft power can reinforce or undermine each other...Indeed, psychologists have found that too much assertiveness by a leader worsens relationships, just as too little limits achievement."

Hard Power -Economic & Physical Force (Coercive) (carrots and sticks)
Soft Power - shaping minds(Co-optive)

http://ksuanth.wetpaint.com/page/Hard+Power+Soft+Power+&+Structural+Power

Soft power is getting results without the use of force. It’s the opposite of hard power, which is getting results using force. Words that are associated with soft power are dynamic, flexible, connected, transformative – all the words that say change is possible without destruction.

Some, like Professor Joseph Nye who first made the distinction, call it the Power of Attraction –the power that draws people to work with you and support you in your endeavours. How much you have depends on how much others appreciate the way you are in the world, what you stand for. Also how open you are to engagement.
….
In the world of international relations, soft power arises out of listening and mediating, being democratic, acting like a global citizen and having attractive goods and services on offer. Soft power is the opposite of using arms, money or the threat of exclusion to set the terms of your engagement. If hard power is the one-way deal, then soft power is reciprocity - mutual agreement, mutual benefit, mutual appreciation.
….
Almost twenty years ago, Joseph Nye made a distinction between hard power (making things happen through force) and soft power (making things happen through attraction). Although hard power seems masculine, expressed through muscle and money, and soft power seems feminine, expressed through relationship and influence, it is not always men who use hard power and women who use soft.

Even so, with leadership still as much as 80% male across the board, we do have an overwhelmingly hard-powered global culture - competitive, profit driven and politically, environmentally and humanely disconnected.

Hard power makes for great progressive strides in science, engineering and military dominance. But if it is not balanced with soft power, human well-being gets left behind.

Indeed, both hard and soft power have their strengths and weaknesses. Too hard is disconnected, inhumane. But too soft is lost in connectivity with no real direction. We need both. And unless we can develop a much better understanding of soft power in this era of hard power, it is unlikely that we will develop an effective partnership between the two.

http://softpowernetwork.ning.com/

End of Quote]

I think te powerful women you speak of are confidant in themselves enough to be more supporting and nurturing in the home (soft power) not to be mistaken as the traditional wifey mentality you exude to with in the context of your post.

More info on Benefits of Soft Power
http://hbswk.hbs.edu/archive/4290.html

 Mountain Lion 1
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 58
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Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 9:57:54 AM
dunno how a thread asking how MEN feel about Powerful woman........ turned into a cat fight
sure makes for great Saturday morning coffee reading,
just not great for the blood pressure...just went past the 180

Now the OP was one of the finest lights here as I recall
dunno if it was the Whiskey or the Vodka driving her, but she sure as heck popped every (secure or not) male ego quill just walking by
but that was not intent ( I guess)

and that is where we can learn of the difference

those who have power and know it can be confident, no need to use power unless necessary... just like equally powerful combatants may engage in sparring for the fun and challenge of it and know when to stop.

Powerful men or women equally may be attracted to the opposite gender with less power or with insecurities and act supporting the other....
I suppose the old fashioned behavior known as dignified behavior

Powerful people do not deflate my ego.
Stupidity does, cuz it is futile trying to defeat it.
 freedomagn
Joined: 2/17/2009
Msg: 59
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 10:01:57 AM
By powerful, there could be two ways of looking at this. In the professional world or the personal world. In the first it is a woman of authority, in the second it usually is a woman who likes to control. Just my opinion and observation!
 MediaNaranja
Joined: 12/27/2008
Msg: 60
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 1:13:37 PM
Ok, let´s try it one more time.... the MN way

POWERFUL ... force, could be destructive, as in tornadoes, earthquakes, manipulation, etc.
CONFIDENCE ... all it means is trust. Self-confidence is just trust in self and own competence.

The OP wrote:

But then there's the most intimidating sort of power - a peaceful, graceful power. This is the sort that is not by might, or by manipulation or any of the other possibilities that could be listed above. It's the sort that exists not because of anything to do with herself, but rather her inner strength of character due to her relationship with the Master if you will....It's the sort that, when you compare yourself to it (and you will), it humbles you ...

The fascinating thing about it is that a person who exhibits this sort of power doesn't actually own it, and is often completely oblivious to it.


I read in the above that it is not even about self-confidence but instead about this other "confidence" ... trust that perhaps the Universe is always conspiring in our behalf?
Surrendering confidently to the stream of life as it carries us through our development.
I agree that it is humbling to be in the presence of such person.
But I disagree that it is intimidating.
If anything it is disarming ... it disarms the egos.

Somehow the word FIRMNESS, consistently expressing the qualities of the spirit, is what comes to mind when thinking about making things happen and growth.

Life is about GROWTH.
MN
¨
 Runs With Wolves
Joined: 1/19/2006
Msg: 61
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 2:05:35 PM

Powerful men or women equally may be attracted to the opposite gender with less power or with insecurities and act supporting the other....
I suppose the old fashioned behavior known as dignified behaviour


Such old school (traditional beliefs) thinking. I have not heard of this kind of relationship in existence without one or the other losing all sense of dignity. Maybe you can elaborate more?
 Mountain Lion 1
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 62
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Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 4:50:16 PM
I have not heard of this kind of relationship in existence without one or the other losing all sense of dignity.

Hmmm..? just because you may not have heard of something doesn't mean it does not exist.

To respond with dignity to any of your questions posed has become a futile undertaking of late as you seem to deny others the quality or state of being worthy, honored, or esteemed simply by undermining such with objections governed by your own version of your view of the world.

WE the dignitary labeled Kingshiatofthehill will endeavor to shed some light where darkness lies.

That attempt by itself is, if you can see it, is an act of support of one with more power supporting another with less.

Of course any satire as the above when misunderstood will awaken the weakness rather than the intellect, which in return will feed the monsters of inferiority, paranoia, etc. and depending on the choice of output become a venomous tongue lashing. That proves but one point. Regardless of intelligence such evil powers unleashed attempt to drag down to their level of inferiority all it can pull. Commonly such attempts can already be observed on a more simplistic level in school classes where the underdog labels and mocks those who are more able until they submit.

Further explanations would require a dissecting of the layers of our society and within the various races ....
To sum it up, the part of "Untermensch" those of society who always cry wolf (no pun intended) will feed on all of the already bad inabilities simply by excusing their lack of willingness to see a positive ( ill persons excluded).

In a scenario of two unequal (as in more and less powerful) persons attracted to each other (for whatever purpose) the bond is about whatever each sees and wishes it to be.
If the less powerful dominates with inferiority the relationship will fail as much as it will in the opposite scenario.
To not deny the other the quality or state of being worthy within their own respect is an ability of (IMHO) good character, generally referred to as dignified behavior.

I do know many couples where one person dominated(s) in wealth, education or career and both benefit from that condition, call it a symbiosis is you will, which is effectively a relationship.
 You go first
Joined: 5/1/2008
Msg: 63
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:31:05 PM

I do know many couples where one person dominated(s) in wealth, education or career and both benefit from that condition, call it a symbiosis is you will, which is effectively a relationship.


And that, in a nutshell (pun intended ) is exactly what I would have written. That was my marriage for 26 years and it worked for us - but, it did take him a couple of years to get over the 'man is the provider' bravado he'd grown up with.
 Runs With Wolves
Joined: 1/19/2006
Msg: 64
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/13/2009 12:24:40 AM
For the WE: Post 67

“By a lie a man throws away and, as it were, annihilates his dignity as a man”Immanuel Kant

“Never take a person's dignity: it is worth everything to them, and nothing to you.”Frank Barron

“As all error is meanness, it is incumbent on every man who consults his own dignity, to retract it as soon as he discovers it”Samuel Johnson

“It is not the quantity but the quality of knowledge which determines the mind's dignity.” William Ellery Channing

“One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it cannot be taken away unless it is surrendered” Morton Kondrake

“Relationships based on obligation lack dignity.” Wayne Dyer

“Maturity is the ability to think, speak and act your feelings within the bounds of dignity. The measure of your maturity is how spiritual you become during the midst of your frustrations.” Samuel Ullman

“True dignity is never gained by place, and never lost when honors are withdrawn”Philip Massinger

“Our dignity is not in what we do, but what we understand.” George Santayana

You talk of Dignity? Well to be honest…the explanation was garbled..if there is such a word. I would like to address your criticism of me which brings into question POWER and WOMEN. Do you think you might have some issues with women and power? What country are you originally from? I would honestly like to understand the thoughts that motivated your reaction...lol. Surely it can't be about me RWW. I asked a simple question…you became defensive. ….

Lol …. Well I wouldn’t label you with the honour of Kingshiatofthehill – but if it makes you feel dignified in the mannerism of being a martyr…it suits you.

WE the dignitary labeled Kingshiatofthehill said:

To respond with dignity to any of your questions posed has become a futile undertaking of late as you seem to deny others the quality or state of being worthy, honored, or esteemed simply by undermining such with objections governed by your own version of your view of the world.


BC postings August 29- 2 posts Sept 4 – one post- Sept 9 – common sense 1 post Sept 12 today- powerful women- regretful or lost – exotic dance –

Do tell me how I denied others the quality or state of being worthy? I may have suggested that there is a timeline as the maturity of the brain when it came to impulsive behaviors based on facts (quoted); I may have resented that if a women made a choice to be wives to their partners - it was termed as traditional wifey roles and that it might be viewed with other frames of thought (quoted); I question the motivation of a poster or his forum thread may disappear; – I am suddenly viewed as not allowing for others the state of being worthy? Where is your common sense now Mr. We (Mountain Lion)? Did it fall over covered with your kingshiatofthehill? Maybe in future, you can avoid feeling cornered exhibiting your feeblemindedness and focus on the fact that this is a forum, not a conversation taken from one of your e-mails. I think you are being abusive and I believe that this is a response you go to when your pride is on the line.
 You go first
Joined: 5/1/2008
Msg: 65
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/13/2009 8:06:59 AM

I think you are being abusive and I believe that this is a response you go to when your pride is on the line.


Then BOTH of you have the power to complain to the Mods about abuse and deal with it that way instead of a flame war in the forum threads. This is really getting irritating.

The point of the thread - Powerful women. Let's get back to it, shall we?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Insecure men and powerful women. or vice versa. The person with 'power' can either use it appropriately or not, those that react with insecurity have their own issues to deal with. I have yet to meet a man that is intimidated by my job status, income, confidence or attitude. Those that would be won't last long.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 66
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Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/13/2009 8:24:07 AM

"For insecure men, powerful women are like porcupines in a balloon farm. They pop egos just walking by.

For secure men, powerful women are welcome company. "


Is there truth to this?


I find the comments humerous at best,,,and more than likely said by a woman whom "assumes" she was a "powerful" person. The word "powerful" itself has so many different definitions,,,especially in the year 2009, so how can anyone truely answer if there is any "truth" in the comments.

I would like to ask thou,,,is "popping egos" suppose to be a good thing,,,or a bad thing???? And is "popping egos" truely a sign of "power" in any sense of that word?????

I honestly think the whole statement is just a generic,wannabe, feel good, statement for someone from a gender that feels it needs to "roar" to prove,,,,,,,,,,something????? I'm shrugging my shoulders at this one.
 Goodbye_Girl
Joined: 1/13/2009
Msg: 67
Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/13/2009 9:30:41 AM
***wanders bleary-eyed into thread....**
***Takes a slurp of coffee***
Funny, I never thought of a powerful woman as one who "popped egos". To me, that smacks of a woman who is insecure within herself and has to prop up her esteem by using this tactic. My belief is that a woman who has or is in power does not abuse it by deflating people. My idea of powerful women, Mother Theresa, Margaret Thatcher, Indira Gandhi, Golda Meir, Benazir Bhutto, are just a few examples.
 Eclectic Elf
Joined: 12/2/2005
Msg: 68
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Powerful woman.....
Posted: 9/14/2009 5:31:40 PM

while I am busy doing my own thing.

No BIG DEAL.


yikeS! now thats a visual i could live without .... (where's the eye bleach...?)


my own thing. No BIG DEAL.


ps.. according to numerous postings in the forums and profiles, size does matter to a lot of the female fish -- so im not too sure one should use that as a "selling point"
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