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 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 18
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their momPage 4 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
[Here is a little bit info for you. Most people are dx'd with BP in their late 20's to early 30's. This usually happens after several misdiagnoses which are usually ADHD or depression]

How the heII does misdiagnosis change anything that I said?!? She was still acting goofy. If I was thinking of marrying someone and they were acting depressed or in ANY manner I couldn't live with then I'm not going to marry them until we have this thing figured out!

So now your defense is going to be, "she didn't show signs til after she had your first child". I've already covered that scenario so go reread my previous post, Brainiac.

She has an excuse as to why her brain doesn't function well, what's yours?? You're the one with a fully functioning brain that could have stopped this whole mess from happening and you CHOSE not to do so. If anything you're MORE culpable!
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 20
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/29/2007 7:29:17 AM
[Oh Please , Lets face it non of us would have married our partners if we know what we know now . We are older and wiser.]

You knew, you just CHOSE to ignore it.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 21
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/29/2007 9:21:28 AM
[Fairmont my dear, how does that change where people are in life now?]

It changes a LOT of things. First off, I have NO sympathy for someone on here whining about their kids' mom not giving them presents when they picked that person!
Secondly, it matters cuz if you don't own your part of it then you're going to do the same types of mistakes, both to yourself and your children.
Thirdly, this selfish behavior is now transfered to your social life that you think you're entitled to. Now your children are going to suffer again because they have the chaos of men either going through their lives AND/OR less attention being given to them because of your dating life. It's likely to cause anger, resentment, and overall hurt feelings. And they have every right to feel that way, they've been put through the ringer. If you don't learn from your selfishness and short-sightedness then you'll keep repeating those mistakes with your children. One of the worst mistakes you're going to make is that you'll teach them that it's OK to not take time to choose their life partner and that divorce is OK. That's the example and attitude you are presenting to them because you don't own your part.

[Life isn't black and white. Not everyone that is "quirky" ends up being a mental basket case.]

No, it isn't black and white but there are common sense things we can do to greatly increase the odds that the black stays black and the white stays white and marrying somebody who is either young and/or mentally unstable is not common sense. In fact it's pretty stupid.
 thallas
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 22
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History
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/29/2007 6:36:29 PM
I can relate to the one that started this topic and although my ex wife hardly calls, writes, or even sees my children the court has kept on her to keep up on her child support. The sad part is that my middle child has detached from the egg donor. I was trying to have them write a letter to her and his words were exactly "Well, she can't be bothered to call or write us, I'm not going to waste the time to write her either." This phrase should never have to be said by 9 yr old.

The children are my life and there was no fight for me to get the children, and I wouldn't change it for the world. Good luck with what the future holds, for your children will respect you for what you have done for them Taz.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 23
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 7:19:53 AM
Odie, at least I have enough brains to know what contraception is and how to use it. At least I'm not out there creating broken homes like you.

Your previous posts are entirely wrong and i've refuted everything you've said in my past posts. You're a selfish person and far from a man. A real man would have either married the mother or would have enough brains to know that his child needs him/her to keep his a$$ home and not out making more 1/2 siblings for them.

But then again you're no man, you're just a boy who's more worried about his wants than his child's needs. You might as well turn your balls in cuz the ones you have are not being used.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 24
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 11:53:57 AM
OHHhh, I'm mistaken. You PLANNED on creating a broken home for your child. Well, that makes you even MORE stupid and selfish! You don't even have "OOOPS" to fall back on.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 25
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 11:59:06 AM
[This make it sound like we all were stupid to have kids,,,,]

It's FINALLY sinkin' in!

[I dont regret having my kids]

Well I'm glad YOU don't regret it but that statement, alone, shows how selfish ya are. Don't ya think the more appropriate statement would be something about whether your kids appreciate you creating a broken home for them??

It's not about YOU or your wants. It's about what's best for your children.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 26
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 12:36:06 PM
[I think what my kids are thinking about now is how much fun they are having playing outside ...]

Go back and reread what I typed and THINK for a change. You TOTALLY missed my point.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 27
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 12:44:38 PM
[to remove my children from the home life they had was the most selfless thing I could have done. If I was selfish, I would have stayed with the man whom I unfortunately loved,,,,]

To keep a child @ 16 years of age is selfish and stupid. To have more kids with the same abusive person is more stupid and then keep THOSE kids and subject them to the chaos of your redneck life is unconscionable! Your parent(s) probably allowed it which is child abuse in my book. They probably even help(ed) you raise your kids for you which is beyond stupid.

But, that was the role model you had. Now your kids are going to suffer the same pitiful fate because you're too stupid to learn from your mistakes, also.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 28
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 1:59:48 PM
Yes, and raising 2 kids in a broken home, while you're a teenager, shows SO much more class.

'Scuse me but do they give you the Dale Earnhardt Tshirt and Pickup truck Gunrack, for FREE, when you do that or is it tacked on to your hospital bill for the maternity stay?
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 29
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 2:50:30 PM
[Do you think it would be better for children to be brought up in an unhealthy environment for the sake of your so called unselfish marriage ideal.]

No, it's better for the parents to act like adults, for once, and get along for the sake of the children. Secondly, you didn't even TRY that because you decided that starting your kids off in a broken home was the right thing to do?!? So, you didn't even have the smarts, or maturity, to even ATTEMPT that! Lastly, if you aren't going to give an honest try at marriage then give the child to an adoptive family that has enough smarts to give the child the stability, and selflessness, that you can't give it.

[What do you say to the widows/widowers out there who think they are entitled to some personal happiness after the loss of their loved one? Is it selfish for those people to want to move on?]

Being a parent isn't a BURDEN, it's an obligation. It's an obligation that requires your full attention. If it makes you "unhappy" to fulfill that obligation and you don't derive enough pleasure and love out of that, then you have NO reason to become a parent in the first place. When you have a child, that child's needs come first and your wants ALWAYS come second. Always.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 30
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 3:19:35 PM
[Nobody plans to raise their kids alone.]

You didn't have the choice to not have sex? You didn't have the choice to use a condom and spermicide? You didn't have the choice to marry the mother? You didn't have the choice to give her up for adoption?

I rest my case.

[Most importantly, in my best judgement, anyone that tells me that I'm a selfish fool for not regretting the best thing that EVER happened to me in my life(my girl) should do so to my face so they can receive the shot in the head that they truly deserve.]

That statement, alone, shows how selfish you are. That whole thing is about YOUR wants, not your child's needs. Keep diggin' the hole.
 Fairmont1
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 31
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/30/2007 3:45:33 PM
And you won't put your case out there cuz you know it will show just HOW stupid you are/were.
 tantricdadio
Joined: 12/25/2007
Msg: 35
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 12/31/2007 5:15:52 AM
I know the feeling and to think that I might be the only Dad in this situation.Ive had sole custody since my Daughter was 4 yrs of age.I agreed to allow the Mom to pay $15.00 perweek.Guess what ? she paid 0.has not contacted my daughter in 11 years and never called her.The Judge warned me that i would probably have a lot of trouble from My daughter because of the absentee but Guess what? Straight A honor student and has adapted well.$18,000 dollars in back child Support and I will sign her off on it if She never shows her Face now because kids are stronger than we give them credit.
And Idont want her coming around at this point in her life and fu***** her head up.
If theres 1 thing I learned from this is never dog the absent parent in front of the kids
They will be thier own Judge of character.They are smarter thatn you think.
 techgirl27
Joined: 9/5/2005
Msg: 37
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History
4th year in a row no presents for bday or xmas from their mom
Posted: 1/14/2008 7:09:45 PM
3 years and none of the same from the father.

I am always broke but manage to find a way to write at least a homemade card or get a "thought" gift even if it isnt a Playstation.

Even at my age, my parents still do a card and something for their (grown) kids birthdays. My stepmom doesnt buy her cards, she makes them, but that shows just as much if not more thought.
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