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 Srohack
Joined: 1/6/2008
Msg: 42
If you are a middle aged man .Page 3 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
Why are you getting so upset over this? There's plenty of women dating men much older. Maybe it's just his preference? Seriously, people on this site are sooooooooooooo insecure with themselves.
 Double Cabin
Joined: 11/29/2004
Msg: 43
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If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/15/2008 2:22:32 PM
Prescient, you are hilarious! you made my afternoon with the last one.

Any man, middle aged or ancient, that says he would rule out an indulgence in young, nubile flesh simply because it comes with a younger woman is in all liklihood a bit less than honest IMHO. IT IS NATURAL!
 Sauder
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 44
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/15/2008 4:36:17 PM
Check out some profiles of young 21 year old women... some of them ask for 27-50 year old man. Yeah, it happens. There are problems with that but it's not my problem and when I have a daughter to look out for, I also have a shot gun and a spoon too.

As a woman you may want to avoid these men so that you don't get traded in for a newer model but other than that, why does it irritate you when people like differnt things?

Frankly, I am 30 and I can not stand the idea of a woman less than a minimum of 23 if she is mature. The reason is that, I figure that by 23 she has not have that many adventures and she needs to see the world some more.

At the same time, an older lady is just fine with me. Whatever floats one's boat.
 that sam i am
Joined: 10/27/2006
Msg: 45
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/15/2008 4:51:56 PM
Dear OP,
a 45 year old man with an age range of 18 to 45 would most likely prefer the 18 year old over the 45 year old so you're really doing him a favour by not wasting his time. Even though, as a male, time IS on his side.

and
What could possibly be classier than a 45 year old man hanging around with a bevy of younger ladies? I can't think of anything classier than that.


Hugh Hefner is a god amongst men!
 toyl76
Joined: 10/27/2007
Msg: 46
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If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/15/2008 7:13:25 PM
I agree there probably is a "too young" and "too old" however I think it really depends on the life style each individual wants to lead and what they are looking for. If both are looking for each other to get out of life what they want and need, so be it. Young, exciting, motivated versus older, boring and set in their ways. Could very well be the opposite e.g. older, exciting and motivated. Whatever works for each individual.
 strollinbella
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 47
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/16/2008 5:14:00 AM
On another dating site I often see profiles of men in their 50s and 60s who say they are looking for a woman between the ages of 18 and 35. Would I contact them, not on your life! Why? The answer, for me, is a simple one. They are looking for a playmate," not a committedrelationship. In my eyes these men are trying to find something that they missed out on when they were that age themselves. Supposedly wisdom comes with maturity. In the case of these men their "wisdom" comes from between their legs!!

And a side note to the poster who said most of the women who look at his profile look like his Great Aunt Bertha. I don't, and I'm in my 50s!!!!!

I have had men as young as 23 and as "old" as 79 look at my profile recently. I don't want to date someone who hasn't got any life experience - but there are some things that I can tutor him in that would be fun for both of us! The 79 year-old, though an honorable and caring man, is the same age as my mother would have been if she was still here with us. Wouldn't mind being friends with him, but dating would seem odd, to say the least.
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 48
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If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/16/2008 5:25:20 AM
O.P, what's the problem with what other people want? Why are you concerned? Try focusing on what you want, and leave the rest of us alone. To answer the question of why a guy might be interested in younger women, besides the obvious physical advantages of being in better condition, younger women are usually less pissed off about life in general. I find most middle aged women to be angry about something, whether it's about choosing the wrong guys in the past (and blaming them for not living up to her standards), not getting the job they always wanted, not getting the 'prince charming' that they always wanted, not getting the lifestyle they always wanted, not getting the perfect family life they always wanted, not having the body they always wanted (or are upset that they don't look as good as they used to, and aren't getting the attention they were accustomed to), I can go on and on, and have had to listen to those complaints at work on a frequent basis coming from women middle aged and older. Anger and a chip on the shoulder are never attractive, no matter what your age.
 that sam i am
Joined: 10/27/2006
Msg: 49
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/16/2008 9:37:50 AM
OMG Stellar by Star Light! That is exactly it!

younger women are usually less pissed off about life in general.

I remember now! Younger women see beauty in things and are less jaded. They have far less emotional Baggage. THERE! I said the B word. And better yet, Most of them don't have kids yet.

Plus, they're a lot more easy to impress.

Who cares if they're not in their sexual prime (as the 40 year olds like to go on and on about)? There's so much more to life than Sex.
 AManofAdventure
Joined: 12/6/2007
Msg: 50
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/16/2008 1:28:26 PM
In response to JWA (message #15)...

Men who say they're open to women much younger than themselves are not necessarily looking for or seeking any one age range----they're simply letting it be known IF someone "much younger" is interested they're welcome to make contact, etc. We don't know and don't relly (LOL) care how this openness or preference is viewed by women closer to our own age----we've already mostly eliminated that range due whatever reasons or experiences. I'm guessing a guy who does look for younger is hoping and wishing they don't have the same bitter, jaded and know-it-all attitudes so many of the "older women" exhibit. Why some women have become this way is not our concern and almost certainly never our individual doing so we don't want to "suffer" being the fall guy for past injuries some women have experienced.

Well said! I simply do not want to rule someone out of court in advance for the "crime" of being a particular age -as long as that age is one of majority of course. But I say this as someone quite a ways from being "middle aged" myself -indeed if I did not reveal my age and avoided using one half to four fifths of my vocabulary, I could easily pass for early to late 20's depending on the given day. (Some days I look older than others.)

I fail to see how an age preference in a man's profile that doesn't suit YOU isn't showing class-----do we assume the same thing with women as well now too?

Yes we do...with women it is height though, not age. Few things are more amusing to me than a woman who tries to rationally justify only dating taller men[1] who then bi*ches about men who would even consider a woman in her early 20's or younger. At least the younger woman can develop into a fully rounded person intellectually and the like whereas the shorter guy is not gonna grow in height. But it is the "middle aged man" who would be the one not showing "class" in the above examples presumably. Uh huh, whatever.

Being open to something means just that------we'd be willing to at least consider someone based upon more than their birthdays. FWIW I am somewhat recently out of a 6 year LTR where she was 22 years younger---and it was HER who picked me up!

I have not dated a woman more than ten years younger myself so you have trumped me there.

Of course, I've always been open to women of ANY age and have dated from 17 years older to various ages of younger.

The oldest woman I have been with was an ex who was fourteen years older than me so you have trumped me there too. Impressive! One question though: were any of the older women also taller than you?

I never sought any one particular age but being willing to see how it would go has always served me well.

Agreed. It is not as if someone goes out checking ID's but sometimes it happens that you find someone whom "conventional wisdom" would say you should not consider (for whatever reason) but there is some appealing element to them that makes you give the appropriate middle finger to "conventional wisdom" and move ahead anyway.

Again, people can change how they look, how they feel, their intelligence, their quality of character, indeed most things about themselves. They cannot however change their chronological age or their height so is it really a lack of "class" to not rule people out on factors they can change or on factors which they cannot change? Inquiring minds wanna know.

Note:

[1] In fairness, I have heard exactly one moderately persuasive argument made for this preference by a woman once but I will not reiterate it here.
 JWA
Joined: 5/21/2005
Msg: 51
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/17/2008 3:44:00 PM
Msg 100 ManofAdventure......................


The oldest woman I have been with was an ex who was fourteen years older than me so you have trumped me there too. Impressive! One question though: were any of the older women also taller than you?


Well I wasn't trying to trump you or anyone on any thing here---was just relating some of my adventures with women of various ages. Interesting question about the older women and height----not a single one of them was taller. Thinking about it that's one very interesting thing...............................

The taller women--including the 6'1" college varsity volleyball player were younger by about 6>8 years at most. The older ones were shorter or about my same height. I guess you could summize I'm not constrained by anything in the age or physical realm----they're just not important to me. I'd not trade my life for something with less women just to satisfy some list of ridiculous traits like those.

I do thank you for your kind words about my post ManofAdventure!!
 AManofAdventure
Joined: 12/6/2007
Msg: 52
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/17/2008 5:45:24 PM
Well I wasn't trying to trump you or anyone on any thing here

Nah, no problem. I just found it interesting that is all.

---was just relating some of my adventures with women of various ages. Interesting question about the older women and height----not a single one of them was taller. Thinking about it that's one very interesting thing...............................

Well, I can at least hang my hat on that one then...at least one older woman was taller by three to four and a half inches "depending on which convenience store either of us was leaving" (cf. Ron White) It also may have helped that she was not an American...women from other countries often seem to be a lot less concerned with this kind of trifling stuff.

The taller women--including the 6'1" college varsity volleyball player were younger by about 6>8 years at most. The older ones were shorter or about my same height. I guess you could summize I'm not constrained by anything in the age or physical realm----they're just not important to me. I'd not trade my life for something with less women just to satisfy some list of ridiculous traits like those.

Agreed.
 JR1961
Joined: 12/2/2007
Msg: 53
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 1/18/2008 7:58:56 PM
Chris, it is hard to explain why some middle-aged men would look to date a woman younger than their own kids. What has surprised me is the number of women who are in their 40's whose desired age range ends a year older then theirs and starts 20 years earlier.

I agree with you that I would have nothing in common with a 30-year-old woman. Her idea of music oldies would be from groups I never even heard of. And her familiarity with the music of my youth would only come from what her parents told her.

And one more thing - I read your profile and looked at your picture. Any man in his 40's or 50's with a hint of eyesight and common sense who wouldn't be attracted to you over any 20-something needs serious therapy.

Good luck - you deserve it.
 imtouchedbyu
Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 54
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If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 5/27/2008 10:42:51 AM
No, I think it shows a lack of class on one hand, wishful thinking and a total lack of knowing who one wants. I think a woman wants a guy who knows what he wants and can be decisive.
She would know that if he can be decisive in what he says in a profile, then it may just carry over into real life.

Bob
 mthomjmark
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 55
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 5/27/2008 6:11:46 PM
Yes; I date women in their mid 20's; You show some class. Just because you look at something in a profile, doesn't mean its the gold standard. It's not all about what you think is right. Live and let live.
 crayonzz
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 56
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:52:02 AM
Chris.
I've seen numerous profiles among women who block men living more than 20 miles away. I've known of one New Yurk girl dumped her fiance after he turned up on a date wearing an out of fashion belt of al things.
It's the women who are shallow. It's the women who have no class.

Most classy men DON'T paticularily think that the young ones will want to date them but they arent going to turn down any offers if they are made.
 aSydneyMale
Joined: 5/16/2006
Msg: 57
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/2/2008 1:03:34 AM

I automatically pass over any man looking to date a women half his age. How vain to believe a young, beautiful woman would have any reason outside of money to date "dad"; and what cracks me up is they are usually overweight and unattractive too.
Younger men hit on me all the t ime. They assume older women are more experienced in bed; and when they are ready for a "real" relationship, they pick women their ages.
I automatically pass them over also. OKAY, folks I know there are exceptions! If I ever do get in a relatonship again, I want it to be for the right reasons


I'm with you here Chosen, the only men who can get away with it are rock stars and the seriously rich. And only because young girls flock to them for their fame and money, if they had neither, the girls wouldn't look twice at them. Who would want somebody to be with them for any other reason than for who they were?

Where I am at the moment, you don't have to be rich by western standards to find a girl half your age, they flock around the western males. It's creepy and bizzare how some of these blokes behave.

As far as you are concerned though, I did a 'double-take' on certain aspects of your profile, very impressive. Would I qualify as a 'younger man' who would have had romantic aspirations with you? lol I hope so.
 beachside 321
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 58
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/2/2008 6:57:05 AM
"Show some class? Your entire post reads like someone who just got shot down by one of these guys and you're here to complain about it, not exactly classy either. "

lk01803, let's not launch personal attacks here. I see no reason to deduce that she's been "shot down" by anyone. I have in fact, wondered the same thing-- why a much older man would want to date an 18 year old-- and I have not been shot down by one of these guys.
 crayonzz
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 59
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/5/2008 4:54:07 AM
lk01803, let's not launch personal attacks here. I see no reason to deduce that she's been "shot down" by anyone. I have in fact, wondered the same thing-- why a much older man would want to date an 18 year old-- and I have not been shot down by one of these guys.
=========================
The reason is simple enough. women don't admit their age, men don't act their age.

The 45 year old woman is holidaying by bus and motel while the 45 year old man is still holidaying by motorcycle and tent on the adventure tour circuit. the 45 year old man doesn't surf, ski, or rollerblade, anywhere near as well as his kids but the point is HE STILL DOES IT.
The lifestyle of the 45 year old woman is more like that of her parents, the lifesyle of the 45 year old man is more like that of his kids. This is the reason they seeek younger women. Common interests that they can still share.
 ColumbiaSingle
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 60
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/5/2008 1:26:29 PM
"Not sure if the same applies to attractive older women though, have you tried pulling a guy half your age recently?"

It is ridiculously easy for me to date and have sex with a younger man, so I assume most women my age could easily do this.

Really, I'm so sick of men my age that don't want me that I am dating the young ones - it beats the hell out of trying to find a man my own age who finds me attractive. Now, let's see, how does this evolution thing work if all these young guys are grooving on us older ladies who can't get pregnant?
 simpleman20188
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 61
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/5/2008 9:16:45 PM
Chris I am trying to figure out why you are bi@tching and whining?

I didn't read the whole thread so it probably has already been addressed.

From your picures you have kept in great shape.

Unless you have the personality of a goldfish or you are as sexualy interesting as said goldfish you should have a plethera of men desiring to date you.

I have my filters and have always had my filters wide open because I am a forum troll and enjoy talking to all kinds of people.
 GeneralizingNow
Joined: 10/10/2007
Msg: 62
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/5/2008 11:25:50 PM
I think it's quite easy to "get" a younger person. It is not easy, however, to have a good, solid relationship with that very young person. We all know the reasons why, we all know that sometimes it works, but USUALLY it ends up being a relationship based on sex. Nothing wrong with that, for me, but don't pretend it's some deep emotional bond you have because you're such a hep cat so all the young chicks dig ya so bad. It's lust and getting your rocks off.

I get hit upon by 25 yrs olds ALL the time because they think "older women have less drama". Of course we do, dearies--we're f ooking you, not having a relationship with you.
 ColumbiaSingle
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 63
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/6/2008 12:30:24 PM
"It still boils down to f*ck 'em and chuck 'em"

Well, it may indeed come down to that. However, at least the young man wants to do the deed with me and finds me sexually attractive. I don't want to get married any way. Apparently, due to biology and evolutionary concerns, I am not f...able at all by an older man so I don't care if a young man's only goal is f... & chuck em. Beats the hell out of nothing at all from an older man except critisism, put downs and predictions of no sex ever again for being female and older, while they remain virile and "experienced." WTF?
 NobleSir
Joined: 1/2/2008
Msg: 64
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/6/2008 6:04:09 PM
The typical desperate guy spreads the widest net possible. The less experienced follow the social adage that younger is sexier. There is also the angle that the younger girls are easier to impress. I always wonder if they just can't compete with the women their own age for in my experience I'm looking forward to aging and continueing to date those around my age a couple years younger or a few older is fine but I'm finding the older the better. Or maybe it was just the water when our crew grew up but I find while relationships are fewer and farther between the rewards far greater even when ending in failure.

oh no offence in the " typical desperate guy" comment but it's genetics that we seek to mate to alone no matter how many ways we tell our selves we choose to be alone,. We all in the same boat.

don't forget this is but my own little opinion and not needed to be taken to anger. :)
 crayonzz
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 65
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/6/2008 6:05:52 PM
Lets see now.

Mid aged man into camping, motorcycling, rolerblading, skateboarding, surfing, rock music, and go karting.

Mid aged woman into resturants, womens trash rags, crochet, astrology, and not much else.

Yea I think I would have to look to a young one for a similar range of interests.
 ColumbiaSingle
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 66
If you are a middle aged man .
Posted: 6/9/2008 8:03:43 AM
here are my middle aged activities

Reading (real books not trash mags - Under the Wire right now about GITMO)

Digital Photography and B&W photography - I use my own equipment at home (scanner, multiple printers)

Gardening - Ok kinda old lady but gee it sure does give you exercise and joy

Friends, beer and grilling.

I can still go dancing and partying if I want to. I choose not to but anytime I feel the urge it is not hard for me to mingle, dance and have fun with people of all ages.

Collecting 1950s kitchen stuff.

I also work 45 plus hours as a litigation paralegal and I do go to court and I don't type any one's letters.

If you find this boring, then so be it.
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