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Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 51
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Dating within' your LeaguePage 3 of 19    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)
Perception is everything ~

I've always thought Nicole Kidman would look good on me

at the end of the day

it's all about what you fill your head with

That will be ~~~~~~~~~ yours ~~~~ for what ever it's worth to you.

Joined: 1/4/2007
Msg: 52
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Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 7:11:24 AM

So I wonder whether some of the posters in here who are claiming that "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" have ever posted in a thread about men or women being shallow and only interested in looks?

That wouldn't be me because I don't believe women only care about looks (and to the extent they do it's height they focus on), or that "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", even as I know there can be no accounting for taste in any individual instance...

looks can be subjective. A woman that is a 9 to me could be a 4 to another man or vice versa. Different people have different tastes.

And thus I feel compelled to balance out the two other previous posters who are all keen on Clark Kent's girlfriend with a much lower rating. I have one of Teri Hatcher's dresses (really, I do), and I just don't think it would look all that good on her.

Ok, now that we have three measures we can do statistics!
Joined: 7/21/2007
Msg: 53
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 7:23:53 AM
I get a kick out of these arsehole "jocks" that sit at a club, pointing and making fun of ...I guess what THEY consider....these guys (average joes perhaps) trying to talk to women, what THEY consider OUT of their league.

One jock actually interrupted the conversation, saying, "HEY, Long time no see, how ya been!!!" line. Very lame.

Assuming that the woman wanted to be "Saved" by this guy or something.
 wild heart
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 54
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 8:34:48 AM
^^^I can't believe people do this!! I don't care even if I wasn't interested in the guy talking to me. I would tell the interrupter "just a minute", finish my convo with the first guy. This is courtesy - nothing to do with who I am more interested in.

Depending on how the "jock" went about interrupting, I might even totally ignore him just for doing that.

I'm an adult, I should be able to end a convo with someone I am not interested in with tact.

I actually had a girlfriend do a similar thing to me. I wasn't sure if I was interested in the guy or not, but I did not appreciate her "blowing him off" for me. Likewise, I don't like people who always try to fix me up when I don't ask for it.
Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 55
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Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 8:50:11 AM
This "ivory tower" effect ~ is common ~ and praticed everywhere

people making sport of others ~ in groups of two or more

While entertaining ~ if not done in warm hearted spirit ~ I find that it can backfire

on you. ~ "Saved by the grace of God , there go I"

The pretties among us ~ can surrive a stroke ~ or come down with Bell's Palsy ~ just wake up with it! It drawing your face to one side ~ and it can last for several years ~ only to go away as quick as it came. ~ It is a humbling experience. ~ No cure , no treatment ~

Many times I've wittness,~ people on top ~ brought down ~ in a heartbeat

As a young man, I knew a guy, ~ had good looks , fine cars ` all the girls wanted him.

had a car accident and damaged his face ~ ended up looking like Porky the Pig.

I know many such stories ~ the moral?

stay sweet ~ stay humble ~ and above all ~ count your "many" blessing

 valla maldoran
Joined: 4/2/2008
Msg: 56
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 8:59:10 AM
Leagues definitely exist whether people will admit to it or not.
Joined: 4/1/2008
Msg: 57
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 11:16:48 AM

" And I'd love to chat it up with you, anytime."


Be my guest. As you can tell, I love to talk/chat.
Joined: 7/21/2007
Msg: 58
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 12:07:10 PM
I can't believe people do this!! I don't care even if I wasn't interested in the guy talking to me. I would tell the interrupter "just a minute", finish my convo with the first guy. This is courtesy - nothing to do with who I am more interested in.

Actually, in defense of HIMSELF....he CLAIMED that she "went along with it" because, I guess he was reading her body language or some crap....and came over and figured she needed "saving"

And she went along with it, and played through and gave him a "staged" hug or something, and then they started talking to each other, and ignored the guy who initially tried to talk to her.

So apparently the feeling was "Mutual"? But , heck , I only heard HIS side of the story, frankly, she probably thought of him as a chump as well.

Apparently, "ugly" people don't deserve respect or something.
Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 59
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Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 4:18:06 PM
There is leagues ~ if you see them

I've got a secret way of seeing things ~ I don't use it anymore ~ I 've long since lost the need. ~but I use to see every one as ~~~ babies ~ thats right ~ babies ~

Small babies walking around crying , laughing and crapping in their pants. ~

You can't get mad at them ~ they are babies ~ it takes the bully right out of a bully.

You can't help but smile and laugh at the prance ones ~ they are so cute and know it.

You treat them sweetly ~ forgive them ~ when they throw up on you ~

Once you acheive this mind set and can ~ stay in it ~ all this ~~ league crap ~ goes away. ~ You are now above it ~~ in a league of your own. ~

As life flies by ~ you will begin to see and reconize ~that you are not alone ~ and if there be a league ~ thats the one you want to be in. ~ It's so easy and it's fun!

 wild heart
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 60
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 4:33:39 PM
I don't see the point of being unneccesarily cruel. Whether in writing or in person.

The only time I am abrupt is when it is a man who I am clearly not interested in is giving me the creeps and I've clearly indicated my preference - one guy I know continues to stare at me all the time and it really annoys me - to the point where I want to go and slug him or I end up giving that "snobby" look. But at the beginning I was not cruel about it and was able to end the convo fairly quickly with tact.

Most guys don't act like that anyhow.

Unfortunately not everyone knows how to reject people with tact. And we've all been there, and we learned.
Joined: 3/23/2006
Msg: 61
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/12/2008 4:50:09 PM
I never beleived in the concept of leagues though there are some shallow individuals out there that like to be pigeonholed.

My take on it is that we all have qualities and faults. Some poor shlub may be a wonderfully smart person with a decent wage, a roof over his head and hasa sence of humor that would put stand up comedians to shame. Dating is like a wine list. There are all thes things on the list we want, but we have to take the best. We do this based on our prefferences vs our requirments. We pick out our matres based on this. Some options aren't available on all models. You can take it or throw it's up to you.
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 62
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/13/2008 1:15:35 PM
there have actually been psychological studies done on this issue. people usually go for people in their "league" or maybe a notch above, but if they it perceive it too far out of their league, they won't even try. this applies not just to dating situations, but to careers, and most other things in life.
Joined: 6/6/2007
Msg: 63
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/13/2008 1:37:00 PM
What is my league???????

---- poeticbliss
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 64
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/13/2008 2:25:41 PM
I'm sure leagues exist to some extent, but what I find attractive isn't necessarily what someone else would find attractive. It's all subjective and a matter of personal preference. That being said, I've dated a lot of guys that I would consider to be out of my own league.
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 65
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/13/2008 2:38:43 PM
Heck If I worried about getting rejected I would just lock myself in and never leave again....................LOL I have talked to women from all walks of life, financial situations and of course appearance. I have gotten along with all. It does not mean that they can not make that match work, it is who you are that wins a woman over most of the time. Looks do make a difference to most people because we all want to be attracted to someone as well as be attractive to them. If not we would not get all dressed up to go out and meet the world..........LOL

PS I have met men and women that do find people out of there so called "League"
I feel sorry for them because the best friend or the best person they may ever meet and are truely looking for mite be right under there nose.
Joined: 2/19/2008
Msg: 66
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/13/2008 2:40:22 PM
I agree,dating within your league is important. I always have social interactions with human beings. People would think you're nuts if you went out with, like, a Panda.
Joined: 1/27/2008
Msg: 67
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/13/2008 3:41:16 PM
I agree it is absurd. But then again in theory it makes sense. Social classes tend to diversify. Its why people size each other up right off the bat. Some people look more at social class and money then physical attraction and vice versa...Look at all the hideously ugly famous frogs with super model wives like Donald Trump. Its physical up into your teens, then we start to deviate from each other. Face it you don't want to date a section 8 welfare lady, and its not going to be easy for you to date a famous super model either. We're all judged on some kind of a chain. Unfortunately, its the life we lead. God judges us in the end. We can't escape, we also can't escape from the realm of where we live and the codes we live by. I have dated millionaires, poor, and middle class. I have broken the rules and been told I've dated out of my league by dating elite and dirt poor, but then again....Whats the penalty ? Who cares really ? Its just life, have fun. People forget we're just all flesh and bone and you can't take your social class with you to heaven or hell.

Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 68
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Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/16/2008 6:23:30 AM
so there we are ~

we live in a world ~ where, like it or agree with it or reconize it or not

some inmature snoots ~ see people in leagues ~

so this explaines some of their odd behavior pattern ~ that makes absolutly no sense to the rest of us, ~ us ~ "not in their league" people.

I was thinking the poor things had neck problems with their noses held up so high.

Like the hunch back bar tender and the hair lip customer.

The hair lip ask , how much it that bottle ~ the hunch back tells him.

Oh! that too high! ~~

The hair lip ask . and how much it that one? ~ the bar tender tells him

Oh! that 's too high!

The Hair Lip says ~ well , thanks for not saying any about me being hair lipped.

Quit alright sir, ~ and thank you for not saying anything about my hunched back.

The Hair Lip says, ~"Oh! is that your back? ~ I thought it was your ass, everthing else is so high in here.

~ and life continue to unfold ~ dar
Joined: 1/10/2008
Msg: 69
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/16/2008 12:54:39 PM
Obviously leagues exist. In fact a person rarely remains in the same league throughout life. I remember high school when I was a nerd and played in the band. The football players got the cheerleaders, homecoming queens and prettier girls. They were the major league players at that time. Over the years things have changed. I have been to several class reunions. My 50th class reunion is coming up in 2010. At the 20th most people where recognizable whereas at the 30th and 40th many were not. Their appearances and many other circumstances had changed, some quite significantly. Some of the cheerleaders and football players did not age well and were not successful in other ways. Some of the nerds aged well and were successful. Some nerds had moved into the major leagues and some of the high school major leaguers were pushed into the minors, even perhaps as bench warmers there. Of course many in life had retained their postions in their high school leagues.

I find it important to be realistic and periodically reassess into which league I belong at the time. After 14 years as a single man I find I am in a different league than I was when I was first single again. The birthdays with zeros on the end seem to change my league. How many zeros are in my net worth number can change my league. My physical appearance and physical and mental condition can change my league. That is life.
 slider 10
Joined: 2/18/2008
Msg: 70
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/16/2008 6:43:41 PM
its a crock of shit, theres no such thing
Joined: 1/19/2008
Msg: 71
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Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/16/2008 6:59:32 PM
You are kidding, right? Men set up leagues on looks, women on finances. One popular site has the minimum income that a man must make in order for a woman to date him. It is almost always higher than what she makes.
Joined: 8/11/2006
Msg: 72
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Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/16/2008 11:40:07 PM
Absolutely OP.
More often rejections come from clumsy inept approaches, or just a plain preference for a person that is not similar to the one making the advances.

To say, "don't even bother" would indicate you l ake the self-confidence, it is self-defeating, am I right??

Bang on. I would think most mature women will tell you that they find confidence atractive but not****-ness, some of the younger ones can be fooled with****-ness. But few will be interested in someone that has struck out before they even reached the plate.
Joined: 11/9/2007
Msg: 73
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/17/2008 12:19:14 AM
After I got married to my ex, a lot of the guys I used to hang out would ask me:" What are you doing with a bloke like that, you are way out of his league?"

And my reply would be:" Because he asked." xx
Joined: 4/2/2008
Msg: 74
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/17/2008 1:23:51 AM

Trust me, look at my profile and tell me whether or not I would be able to date someone that looks like Cindy Crawford or say a Paris Hilton or Jessica Alba, no friggin way will that EVER happen.

Those women aren't out of your league. It's just that the line is far too long to wait (and as far as Paris Hilton, would you really?).
Joined: 12/8/2005
Msg: 75
Dating within' your League
Posted: 4/17/2008 4:02:48 AM
'you always miss 100% of the shots u don't take'

rest my case
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