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 Miss G
Joined: 5/1/2007
Msg: 76
Talking about sex before even meetingPage 4 of 22    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)
Same faux pas as eating dessert before dinner. Poor form. A good partner is not a quick fix, they're a spectacular person you want to see again and again. For the right person, you should enjoy every second with them, not rush to the finish line. And if life is short, it should be short because time flies when you're both having fun.
 itsjustme328
Joined: 12/22/2007
Msg: 77
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 6/14/2008 11:08:16 AM
I've noticed this as well but only with the men I meet online. Sorry guys, but nearly all of the fellas I've had contact with online start asking questions or making comments like that right outta the gate. My move is to advise him that I'm not comfortable having conversations like that before we even get to know each other....and I have been called a prude. I can live with the name-calling. (LOL)

I've lost a few at that point, and again, I can live with that. A few others were fine and understanding and evidently decided it was worth the risk to get to know me.

I'm not saying I'd never want to have that talk. I'd just prefer that when sex entered the relationship, we'd read each others cues or ask outright if the other enjoyed what was happening, or even provide some direction as to what we liked.

I don't want to provide a study sheet beforehand. I prefer the sex to be a bit more spontaneous than that and we'll see what happens naturally.

 smileee4u
Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 78
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:55:45 PM
To talk about one's sexual likes and dislikes before you find out anything about them is akin to him hunting for a prostitute of his choice. Do not go there. First things first. If you are so upbeat and open about your sexual preferences, he is disrespecting you from the start, and will only get worse. He is testing you to see how far he can abuse you in the future. It is not necessary to discuss sexual preferences. This can be worked out, in a loving relationship later, when you have a committment. He is trying to get the upper hand by seeing how far you will go, in order for him to abuse you.
 smileee4u
Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 79
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:59:53 PM
To start discussing sexual likes and dislikes in e-mails is akin to them calling a 900 number for sex talk. I have had guys want to start that.... and I can see where it is leading.... straight into an obscene phone call, or e-mail. It is really creepy when you get a guy like that.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 80
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 6/23/2008 3:45:29 PM
It just makes men look silly and like sex starved 22 year olds. They look dumb as hell when you meet them and they are not attracted to you and you are not attracted to them and in their minds they had you looking like their favorite porn star even though you sent them a pic, and they cannot leave the date fast enough cause i guess reality is too hard to swallow?
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 81
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 6/25/2008 3:51:22 PM
I have an extremely HIGH sex drive, but I don't talk about it. Why talk about it?
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 82
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 7/13/2008 6:47:25 PM
I met few guys at Yahoo personal that ask me these questions,I brutally asked them if they just got out of jail and what crime did they do,that tick them, it tick them more when I said **My lines > "If you did not come out of jail,then you are a pervert,you are a P#$$y starve"".lol we were planning to meet but we are already fighting. These are my stories on men who talk sex before I meet them...And No kidding they are in the bracket of 55 plus of age.
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 83
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 7/13/2008 6:50:40 PM
I have dignity not to be a sex object to a man who wants sport sex.
 morgan28oi
Joined: 6/29/2008
Msg: 84
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 7/15/2008 11:44:43 PM
It is disrespectful. A gentleman would never do that.
 anightwhisper
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 85
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 7/16/2008 6:51:08 AM
Just ran into this issue too...our 1st meet, went well, then he had to call on his way home to say "I bet you have beautiful titties" I said thank you and hung up in his ear.....he did not get the answer he was expecting, now did he? Damn fool he is.
 anightwhisper
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 86
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 7/16/2008 6:53:19 AM
Just ran into this issue too...our 1st meet, went well, then he had to call on his way home to say "I bet you have beautiful titties" I said thank you and hung up in his ear.....he did not get the answer he was expecting, now did he? Damn fool he is.
 FortyFine44122
Joined: 2/9/2008
Msg: 87
Talking about sex before even meeting means you'll never meet
Posted: 7/16/2008 9:14:59 AM


personally don't think it's a good idea. Sex, to me, is something private and should be shared with a special someone not some stranger you haven't even met.

I can respect that view - but on the other hand, theres the old saying sometimes "the easiest person to talk to is a stranger" - becuase its someone you may never know, or see again - so what harm?
The harm is that you'll never see this person again...which is no harm
If somebody can't take time to see you in person and start discussing sex before "to save time and money" then they probably not out for LTR, right?

Soo, it's the easiest way to separate one from another. You won't believe but the best men I've dated wouldn't even support the subject of sex even if I bring it up (like a joke etc)
MEN WILL CHANGE the subject!!! it's all depends on class of a man....and a woman.

Everybody chooses what fits them best
 JIMMYSEZ
Joined: 9/10/2007
Msg: 88
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 7/25/2008 7:16:59 PM
I think you and reggyboy would be great as commentators on T.V / Radio opposite opinions...could be a fun show !
 JIMMYSEZ
Joined: 9/10/2007
Msg: 89
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 7/25/2008 7:17:49 PM
I think you and reggyboy would be great as commentators on T.V / Radio opposite opinions...could be a fun show !
 gracemlady
Joined: 11/30/2007
Msg: 90
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/7/2009 9:09:30 PM
I am a devout Christian and some men immediately telll me they are so "sexual" or "sensual". It is so stupid to bring this up to someone who posts that they are a devout Christian. I don't behave that way before or after I meet a guy. Just the facts. I agree with what everyone who said the guy that does this is selfish and only looking to get their rocks off.

 kellygrl51
Joined: 9/21/2008
Msg: 91
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/8/2009 6:05:43 PM
As soon as he does it I quit talking to him. To me it shows a lack of class....
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 92
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/8/2009 6:15:19 PM
So man classy women here with good taste, the men should be in heaven....
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 93
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/10/2009 11:32:26 AM
That's what makes the men look like bozos. They act like they are crazy about you and then you meet them and their fantasy of Miss America is shot to s**t, even though you have sent a picture and told them about your appearance. If I was going to lie, why would I lie and say that I am an average looking/cute 51 year old woman who looks like Thelma on Scooby Doo cartoons? (to my students, who of course think I am great since most of them still respect teachers and they do not judge a person by appearance). Maybe he has not had sex in such a long time he has to talk about it to get thrills? The real deal when there is chemistry is thrilling to me, I do not need to talk about it with a stranger.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 94
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/10/2009 2:51:51 PM
Go girls........at least we tried to tell them that some of us are ladies and we like gentlemen.
 nyled
Joined: 10/18/2007
Msg: 95
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/11/2009 6:22:19 AM
People don't want to admit it, women especially, but sex is a very important part of a relationship if it's going to last. Anyone saying anything else is confused, lost or nieve. Personal time, and sexual compatability are 2 huge factors in long lasting relationships.
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 96
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/11/2009 8:05:06 AM
People are way too willing to take the mystery out of the thing. It's ridiculous, really.

Talking about sex in general before I meet someone isn't the problem.. I don't care one way or the other.. in fact hearing that you've got a large libido more or less up front, just tells me we might match after all... for one example, but I've adopted the stance of refusing to answer say.. a favorite position query, by saying something like, "For me to know and you to find out."

If they still pound away (pun) with the what do I like questions after that, I do write them off big time.
 ColonelIngus
Joined: 9/16/2007
Msg: 97
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/11/2009 8:38:40 AM
It's just like women always wanting to talk about relationships before meeting... It's the surest way to get written off big time. And in public, I just smack `em.
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 98
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/11/2009 9:31:20 AM
^^

Um, just wonderin...

How can you talk about a relationship you don't yet have with someone you've yet to meet?

Hope they smack you back.. seriously.
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 99
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/11/2009 9:49:31 AM
I've enjoyed learning about men's attitudes to sexuality and preferences - which is different than 'sex talk'. I think it is a legitimate part of the 'getting to know you' process and helped me decide who to meet... I wasn't going to bother to meet a man who obviously wasn't compatible with my sexuality.

On-line is backasswards to meeting in real life in many respects and one aspect of this is the ability to have conversations about sexuality before you know them well. I also discussed religion and politics too, go figure.

I do think there is a difference in the level of importance placed on sexual incompatibility in a relationship. It may well be that people who have been mismatched with prior partners place a higher priority on 'checking it out'.
 brian1207
Joined: 12/5/2008
Msg: 100
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 1/11/2009 8:45:24 PM
you are talking to a married or involved person that is using you for their sexual fantacy - total waste of time, move on now!! 90% chance they will not meet you, but if they do it will just be for sex - as soon as they can get away from their partner.
whats the point? reduse your online time and push for a first meet asap. once you have met and then if sexual tension builds, have a much fun messaging about sex as you want
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