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 ankkka
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 17
When does it change from dating to a relationship?Page 3 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
To recapitulate...
a man over 50 likes:
-good meal...
-a 40 inch flat screen TV...
-sex...

Now I'm really confused...

what is his number one?
 ankkka
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 18
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/16/2008 3:20:57 PM
Ooops...I mix up!
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 19
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/16/2008 6:42:38 PM
Ankka: Number 1 is a good meal, of course. Men will suffer through watching the came on a 40 inch TV, and even make love to you after the game, if you insist, as long as they get a good meal in there somewhere. On the other hand, no amount of sex in front of a 40 inch TV will keep a man from missing his mother's home cooking.
 Chagal116
Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 23
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/17/2008 12:37:41 AM
I Would consider dating becomming a relationship when a man asks a woman to be in an exclusive,committed, manogomous relationship, and the woman agrees. At this point the two dating people are now exclusive and have intimacy. Living together may be the next step. you do not have to be living together for the dating to become a relationship.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 24
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/17/2008 5:16:07 AM

I Would consider dating becomming a relationship when a man asks a woman to be in an exclusive,committed, manogomous relationship


I have to say that even although I have been in several long term relationships, that I have never felt the need to actually ask a woman t be exclusive, committed, monogamous, etc. I have never been ask that either. Feelings, understanding, communication at all levels always made me aware of the status of things without the need for formal declarations or interrogations. We just knew that was the way it was and the way it had to be.

I think that if you have to ask, then you probably shouldn't and just move on.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 25
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/17/2008 7:36:41 AM
There are lots out there that don't see one on one as anything but a serious limitation of the human experience. Historically, one on one is a relatively recent formalism of the western culture, largely related to property rights, something that has no relationship with human emotions or behaviour. One can even view it as a form of repression, especially of females.

On the other hand, the stable reproductive couple phenomenon is well manifest in all places world wide for all kinds of reasons, being somewhat easier to handle on a daily basis being, in my view, one of the most important ones.

The one man many wives option seen throughout the world, and evident in the west as part of some religious and social groups, has a significant economic base as its origin, and once the parties escape from western political correctness, appear to be quite satisfied with such relationships. One hears less, however, about manifestations of one woman many many husbands or consorts, although in the famous cases reported in history, these people appear to have enjoyed life as well.

Of course, I am aware of media reports about "abused" females who are "rescued" from these situations, a lot of times by force and subsequent exposure to various forms of "re-education". Again, this is in my view not related to the emotional dynamics that must occur in these relationships, and which are natural expressions of what we humans are. In a third of the world, or more, the one on one idea just doesn't exist. In the west, if you don't subscribe, the moral authorities can be expected to react with negative vibrations.
 MacKevinized
Joined: 2/15/2006
Msg: 26
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/17/2008 8:23:13 AM

This is simply not true. It's a blanket statement that you're assuming applies for everyone who chooses to be non-monogamous. I take particular offense to "They will need a steady supply of new recruits..."


If a man chose to declare they want multiple partners here there would be all kinds of flack flying around about him being a player.

I know a guy that does believe in multiple partners and used to have a slogan "Never let one woman get you down, it takes 3 or more."
He spent years cultivating his lines to attract multiple partners and lots of money keeping them entertained. His justification was they all knew about each other.
Well, all his women found guys that would give them more attention than he was able to and he eventually came to the conclusion he should only go after crazy women that 'needed' his attention and has succeeded in finding 2 that put up with his reasonings. They are both crazy and now he complains he's got 3 times the problems of guys in monogamous relationships. The 2 women he lives with (they live 200 miles apart) and trying to find others.


I don't ever feel "the need for new recruits", and I can't believe anyone would even say such a thing, to be honest. The plain and simple truth is I don't have even ONE partner with whom I share all the intimacy of a full relationship...and I'm STILL polyamorous. I don't need to "recruit" someone so that I've always got a full stable....


I see you're still recruiting and think it will be interesting to know if your multiple partners will have multiple partners that have multiple partners.
I see your polyamorous theories aren't working in a practical application. Quite like the other people I've known that attempt it.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 27
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/17/2008 8:51:29 AM
Many years back an Arab guy once told me that when you have 4 wives, by the time you get home from the office they have spent the day plotting against you. You are better off with only one, as she has no immediate help in developing her strategies. Its MUCH harder to keep ahead of 4 than it is to keep ahead of only 1 woman, and even that is difficult.
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 32
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/19/2008 10:01:56 AM

It's actually a very difficult question to answer. While I can't explain to you what porn is, I know it when I see it. Same with a relationship.



...Oh thats funny......let me try................Its also like not knowing where someone lives but knowing how to get there?


...maeflowers
 Beaugrand®™©
Joined: 3/24/2008
Msg: 33
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/19/2008 11:56:50 PM
It becomes a relationship when I allow her to drive my car. It's not that it's such a great car (it's a 16 year old Buick), or that I have great sentimental attachment); it's a matter of trust. There are probably other indicators but that's the one I would notice first.
 cds0688
Joined: 4/15/2008
Msg: 34
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 4/20/2008 9:56:03 AM
Guess I'm old fashioned, I only date one at a time. Also sex does not make it a relationship, it is one of those things that when you are dating helps to determine if you are compatible for it to become a "relationship".
 ters
Joined: 7/21/2008
Msg: 41
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 7/28/2008 3:40:22 PM
As soon as you actually.......... look, into each others eyes.................
 Moonchild51
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 42
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 7/28/2008 9:16:16 PM
Ummm? When he asks me to wash his shorts? I guess if I get there, I will just "know" much the same as he will.

And now back to our regularly scheduled program!!!!
 MelloDLyn
Joined: 10/25/2004
Msg: 44
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 7/28/2008 10:36:22 PM
It is dating until the two of u openly discuss that it is more. Some people just date around and others like to be in one on one relationships.
 Chagal116
Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 45
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 7/29/2008 12:10:32 AM
I've noticed that the guys are in favor of not discussing, and the ladies are more towards the discussing....There has to be some talk to be on the same page. If your dating you may be getting to know more then one person at the same time thus one could not assume you are exclusive untill someone brings it up. Frankly I don't have to date someone for very long to know if it's friend or boyfriend. However and I say again I would not make the mistake an assume I was in an exclusive relationship if no one asks or says anything.
 smhrgs3000
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 46
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 7/30/2008 11:30:43 AM
I'm finding it interesting that the majority of Canadians seem to take nothing for granted until discussed, and mutually agreed upon, while we Yanks (especially the ladies) tend to make far more assumptions, and have far more unspoken expectations.
After growing up in Kansas, traveling for decades including two years in Canada, I'm confused, LMAO.
Never assume, without first discussing, and aggreeing.
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 48
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 7/30/2008 4:28:31 PM
Dating is just that..dating. A relationship is different - you want to see each other everyday, you can't keep your hands off each other, you want to be with each other, sleep together, etc., all the time.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 50
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 7/31/2008 6:13:40 AM
When he lets you wear his favorite Abercrombie & Fitch shirt. . . .

When he wakes up early to watch you sleep. . . .

When he automatically reaches back for your hand when you go for a walk. . . .

When you skip desert so you can get back to the motel room. . . .

When he lets you try out an eggplant recipe on him. And smiles. (He hates eggplants). . . .

When you can take a five day road trip, and everyone's smiling at the end of it. . . .

When. . . .

Ah, heck -- *you* know when, doncha?


 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 51
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 7/31/2008 7:32:07 PM
For women: after the second date. For men: after the second decade.
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 53
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When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 8/1/2008 1:23:21 PM
You think?????

I know many women that view sex that same way men do, just end up in the same place using a different road.

There are those that are sexual, but not in a relationship, such as fwb's, and others that are just together when feasible or possible with the way their lives are put together.

Some are long distance and see each other when possible, but because of the time between visits, might have others in their lives as well.

OT.......I believe that when you decide that you are exclusive totally is when you take the dating part out of it, and become a an exclusive relationship.

There are some that you date and have a relationship with, but you are not exclusive for whatever reasons exist.

I also know some that are married, but sex has stopped and yet they still have a relationship because of the children involved, finances, etc., and they keep going for those reasons.

With this in mind, the relationship part starts and finishes with the both of you being on the same page together, and communicating it openly and honestly.

Just my opinion......
 Nao_Namorado
Joined: 7/23/2008
Msg: 54
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 8/1/2008 2:15:27 PM
Imagine how many of these questions would vaporize into the miasma if we humans weren't tempted to label every freakin' thing. As if just enjoying the fact that you've someone to spend time with--who cares if every moment isn't torture-analyzed, and that each phase doesn't have a formal name, or convey mystical meaning--isn't satisfaction enough.
 deere rancher
Joined: 7/9/2008
Msg: 60
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 8/3/2008 8:20:48 AM
gee , oldsoul
you make it sound like it so hard to find a man to have sex with you , with no strings attached,
is that really the case ? i hardly think so
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 61
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 8/3/2008 10:22:43 AM

When does it change from dating to a relationship?


....Somewhere between that first kiss and him unloading all his stuff into your bathroom medicine cabinet


...maeflowers
 yankeefan66
Joined: 4/9/2008
Msg: 62
When does it change from dating to a relationship?
Posted: 9/9/2008 3:48:45 PM
Depends on the definition of the 2 words inside the minds of the 2 people..
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