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 crayonzz
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 70
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?Page 2 of 19    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)
Legaly it's rape if the girl's TOO drunk to know what she's saying.

There's an easy way round this. Take her home, leave her knickers on till the next morning, and see if she's still horny when you both wake up.
 opnmydm
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 72
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/24/2008 5:17:20 AM
if i were you, you better get tested for an std, sounds like she has done this before..bang, i bet your infected now...but to answer your first question, if she gets a lawyer and says it is rape, your in trouble..
 Renaissance Mun
Joined: 8/9/2007
Msg: 75
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/24/2008 9:01:34 AM
Well, if a person, under the influence of alcohol, is not to be held responsible, doesn't that cover both parties here? If she is not to be held accountable because she was drunk and chose to have sex, shouldn't he also not be held accountable because, he too, was drunk and chose to have sex? Are we not holding on to an out-dated double-standard here? A man and woman, in exact circumstances, both choosing to do the same thing. Either both are held accountable or neither is held accountable. Conclusion: Not rape, by the woman or the man.
 Ignoble
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 76
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/24/2008 10:06:07 AM
RE: Topic.

That's easy. When she says "No." or is incapable of saying "No."

Its as easy as that. If she can still talk and wants to have sex... then whats the problem? People speak more truthfully when drunk then if they're sober. So if a girls wants it while shes drunk you can take that to the bank.
 sin2gether2
Joined: 8/18/2007
Msg: 77
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/24/2008 4:22:49 PM
Sorry but I have absolutely no sympathy or respect for guys who take home drunk women. The women might have been too drunk to be thinking straight. But it was you who took advantage of the situation and had absolutely no thoughts except about what was in your pants. And you are saying these girls were "good in bed" when they were in this condition? I can hardly imagine that to be true.
There is no such thing as a woman taking advantage of a guy who is pissed out of his mind drunk. I've never heard of the reverse situation. What could be attractive about that? Yet for some unknown reason, a woman who can barely stand up is considered hot stuff?
But what does it say about you guys who do that? Desperate. Disgusting.
 matchlessm
Joined: 11/11/2007
Msg: 82
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/26/2008 2:27:30 AM
suzanne36 lkn,

Yes, on both counts. People may get drunk for a lot of reasons. For all anyone else knows, a drunk person may just have found his mother dead that day, found out her fiance's fallen in love with another woman, or lost his wife in a car wreck. If a person so overwrought gave a stranger all their money, or allowed someone with an STD to have sex with them, they would have every right to feel used afterwards.

Outside of war, it's wrong to take advantage of people when they're temporarily unable to watch out for themselves. By getting drunk, a person may be running the risk that other people will take advantage of them--but they're not *authorizing* them to do that. Whatever someone's reason for getting drunk, it's wrong to profit at their expense and then excuse yourself by claiming they "consented." Someone really intoxicated isn't capable of *knowingly* consenting to anything.
 mjttigger1
Joined: 9/2/2007
Msg: 83
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/26/2008 3:14:33 AM
Consider what you would have done if she wasn't drunk, but just in a bad frame of mind at the time.

One day at 18 I came home from school and found no one home and a note on the table that my parents were getting a divorce. I really needed the support of a friend at the time. The only person I knew with divorced parents was a guy that I thought was my friend. He had been trying to pressure me into having sex previously and I always said no. However, that day I was so upset (crying nonstop ) that when he started pressuring me I said "I don't care". I was just too upset to argue with him about it. He knew that if I wasn't so upset I would have said no, but he did it anyway. The part that upset me the most was he took my virginity. I would never consider what he did rape. However, I do believe he took advantage of me and of a bad situation.

I don't think your situation should be considered rape. However, I do believe that you took advantage of a girl that you knew wasn't thinking straight when she consented to it. Doesn't really matter if she was completely wasted or just a little drunk. She was still not thinking clearly at the time. I don't think you should feel justified in your actions whether it is considered rape or not. You still did a spineless thing, rape or not.
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 85
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/26/2008 5:38:40 AM
If someone is so inebriated that they cannot make a proper judgement you should leave them alone. They should not drive or go home with a stranger. You're only asking for trouble. Do you really want a cop knocking on your door one day and playing he said she said? Protect yourself. Is one night of sex worth screwing up your entire life for? Plenty of guys have been railroaded for this exact thing. Use your head. If you have never had a 100% sober woman you've known for 5 minutes insist on you taking her home for sex, then logically you should be able to deduce that her behavior is NOT normal.
 matchlessm
Joined: 11/11/2007
Msg: 89
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/26/2008 10:52:58 AM
People do all sorts of things that fall short of being crimes, but are not admirable or even moral. The best way to discourage those actions, when the law can't, is by shaming or shunning people who take them. But the anonymity that comes with living in big cities tends to make that harder to do--"I'll never see them again anyway." But if people in our social circle do sleazy things, we shouldn't hesitate to let them know, by what we say, do, or both, what we think of them.
 danieljarvis
Joined: 12/25/2007
Msg: 90
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/26/2008 5:37:51 PM
if women are so much better than men,why do they produce them? these problems will last as long as the sun
 matchlessm
Joined: 11/11/2007
Msg: 93
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/26/2008 11:20:46 PM
prairiechick2,

How drunk would a woman need to be for a guy to be taking advantage of her by having sex with her? And just how would a guy know that he couldn't get the same girl to have sex with him, if she were sober?

One very rainy night years ago, I was at one of those gigantic dance bars. As I was about to leave, a young lady I'd been talking with earlier in the evening appeared beside me. She said her girlfriends had taken off, she knew she'd drunk too much, and she didn't think she should try to drive home. If I was going her way, could I give her a lift? If so, she'd pick up her car in the morning. She lived pretty close to me, so I said sure. I only meant to help her out.

After a few minutes, as we neared her place, the streets in places were like streams--good thing she wasn't driving. As I stopped in front, she put her hands on my arms, said something complimentary, then slid over and put her arms around me. "I really want you to come in." She was very pretty, and just for a moment, the angel on my one shoulder and the devil on the other had a hell of a row. But this time the angel won--dammit! I told her I was very flattered, but that she should be a good girl and go inside, drink some water, and go to bed. And off I drove, thinking of the fun I'd missed and feeling kind of idiotic.
 SPIRITS WILL FLY
Joined: 4/13/2008
Msg: 97
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 4/27/2008 7:12:08 AM
well, I always go the rule if you bring a girl to the dance you should see she gets home safetly..... I would never pick up a drunken Woman, if they don't care about about themselves , not worth my time. Lets call this what it is what it is a case of low self esteem all boozed up. I try to maintain composure while out in public. In our society where people blame everything on anyone but themselves, keep your distance. I don't know about rape but I do know about living within a moral code that am proud to have any one scrutinize.
 Pepe LePew
Joined: 5/30/2008
Msg: 107
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 10:06:01 AM
THIS IS PROOF US THAT GOD HAS A GREAT SENSE OF HUMOR. HE GAVE US TWO HEADS & ONLY ENOUGH BLOOD TO OPERATE ONE AT A TIME!

I remember in the very early 80's my 17 yo shipmate got caught "CONSENTUALLY" boinking his 16 yo g/f by her mother (he was using a condom they were both sober). When our Commanding Officer found out,my shipmate was questioned about the circumstances and the boy was restricted to the ship for a month to appease the angry parents and that was it.

Now play that same story in 2008..... press, media, jail, rape, Pentagon closes Navy for a week for sensativity training, bla, bla, bla. Let's not forget the candidates and what they might say. How many MILLIONS/BILLIONS of $ would be spent to crucify this kid for political gain.

NOW LET'S ADD ANOTHER VARIABLE TO THE EQUATION......ALCOHOL.
 MelloDLyn
Joined: 10/25/2004
Msg: 108
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 11:42:56 AM
If she were drunk and she passed out and u had sex that would be rape. If she were given a date rape drug and u had sex with her that is rape. If she were drunk and consented and u had sex with her that is drunked sex. She may regret it but she agreed at the time.
 Boricua Papi
Joined: 10/8/2007
Msg: 109
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 12:09:35 PM
Taking an "adult" woman who is drunk to your house and having sex with her is not rape. She made an "adult" decision to get drunk in an environment she knew she was going to find fast sex. Relax and don't feel guilty about it! If she regrets it afterwards, tell her "let's do it again sober!"
 blondi75
Joined: 8/30/2007
Msg: 110
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 1:58:33 PM
Drunk or not u still know what ur doing!!
 mthomjmark
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 111
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 2:05:33 PM
First of all, she could say afterwords that you raped her and it's your word against hers.

Why you would want to have casual sex with someone so drunk is beyond me. How romantic.
 Spanish Lover XCLNTE
Joined: 5/9/2008
Msg: 114
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 6:13:31 PM
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?

When she steals your car keys, wallet, imitation snakeskin cowboy boots, fake civil war belt buckle, your favorite bunny slippers that you claimed belonged to a niece who left them behind last Christmas Eve, oh, and she drinks your last gay bottle of Corona...

I feel so violated...
 Boricua Papi
Joined: 10/8/2007
Msg: 116
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 6:56:42 PM
Rape is sexually violating someone, using force or coercion. When an "adult" woman goes to a bar, makes the adult decision to drink over the limits of her limitations, she is giving out her power to access to herself by others. This is not rape! It is a conscious adult decision to enter an environment when you can get sex or be offered sex! Of course, the woman might accuse the person whom she had sex with of rape, which is not cause because taking a person to her/his house or the other person's house is viewed as a consensual action! Rape would be in a case she or he is taken out of the bar by force(drunk or not) and sexually violated in a dark alley, the back of the bar or the back seat of a car! If you don't want to be in such situations just do not drink or at least have a friend to back you up in case you lose it. Bars and night clubs are meat markets, don't act like you did not know!
 Spanish Lover XCLNTE
Joined: 5/9/2008
Msg: 117
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 7:20:58 PM
You're absolutely right boris, but it's amazing how many sickos hang out in bars, passive aggressive types just waiting to get at the low hanging fruit. Back in '90, I visited a female friend of mine in Detroit. We went out with some of her girlfriends and they proceeded to get plastered. Well, some seedy characters suggested we rent a hotel room and party there after the bar closed down. They were slimey dudes but not aggressive at all, just hoping that someone would party naked so they could join in. Good thing, cause they were big dudes and could have been dangerous. I was in good shape back then but I get a little on edge, kinda like my spidey sense was firing off and I grabbed the gals and ushered them out of there before something happened that they would all regret the next day. But it's odd, it seemed like the women almost wanted something weird to happen, I guess loneliness leads people to exercise some pretty poor judgement...
 MetalVixxn
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 120
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 8:49:21 PM
Did you at any point think it was rape?
I think you feel what you did wasn't right or else you never would have posted this.

None of us were there so only you know if you took advantage of her.
 Willsniffurundies
Joined: 4/7/2008
Msg: 121
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/2/2008 10:06:40 PM
It is considered rape when she sees your face and decides she doesn't LIKE how you look. . .OR it is considered rape when you didn't make her cum enough. . .okay, we now return you to our more serious responses. . .damn, dude. . .why not make sure she likes you BEFORE she is drunk!?
 Spanish Lover XCLNTE
Joined: 5/9/2008
Msg: 123
When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/3/2008 3:59:28 AM
I hate to break it to the person that said they didn't want to f*ck, but they did want to, and they tried when they were sober, these were people I knew, geez. When are people going to more carefully read these forum posts??!! By the way, I don't do it with folks that hang out in those joints because ppl that frequent meat market bars don't really care about you, they just want to get laid with no strings attached.

My first post was in gest, my second a very serious warning to women that there are lowlife predators to watch out for. I have never personally picked up a woman in a bar regardless how drunk they were or the offers I got. I only go to bars to unwind and have a few beers but let's face it, they are pick-up joints and that's the main reason guys and gals go there. So get off the soap box and face the facts. People go there to get laid not to establish monogamous longterm relationships. The folks there don't usually even use their real names. So if it's mutual, it can't be rape. If as someone has already pointed out, it's forced in an alley or else where, or rushed, then I guess the woman/man feels slighted that it wasn't "romantic" enough. Give me a break! People don't go there to find a romantic lay, they just want to get it on and get it over. Especially the later they hang out waiting for it. Now if they don't get obnoxiously drunk, then maybe they are more civilized and worthy of further consideration but if someone wants to go home that night with you, then there isn't any excuses possible - ho-down time!

 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 124
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/3/2008 8:35:07 AM
If someone can not give INFORMED consent then legally that is rape.

Take what chances you will.. that's the law. You wanna play, you'd better be willing to pay.. it's called being responsible for oneself.
 Willsniffurundies
Joined: 4/7/2008
Msg: 125
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted: 6/3/2008 10:46:35 AM
Speaking of being responsible for oneself. . .HELLOOOO???. . .if you get drunk and tell a guy to take you home and do you then YOU are not being responsible for yourself. If you got your "i'm-just-s-poor-helpless-drunk-girl-who-is-too-repressed-to-get-what-I-really-want-when-I-am-sober" ass intoxicated then YOU are not being responsible in the first place.
Law? Hell, women were not able to vote at one point. Just because you call something a law does not mean it is fair.
Perhaps we really need a lawyer to post here.
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