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 funonly4me
Joined: 1/16/2012
Msg: 165
sugar mommy?Page 5 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
In exactly the same situation as Phoebe 48. Also waiting to hear the real benefits, LOL!
 justme32547
Joined: 7/27/2011
Msg: 166
sugar mommy?
Posted: 1/29/2012 5:59:40 PM
Welcome to Amercia.....everyone wants something for free!!
 SeaCatcher
Joined: 9/11/2011
Msg: 167
sugar mommy?
Posted: 1/31/2012 4:28:36 AM
To moonchild48's comment [Heck yes they move in for the kill so to speak. And no, one does not have to have much communication sometimes before the issue is brought forth....Usually it starts with.."I am changing what I seak in my choice of ladies. Am leaning towards a more stable, professional type woman". You do the translation on that one!] I'll add a bit more. This came from a post from a much younger man who thought I'd like him come and live with me: "I'm willing to move to your place at a moment's notice." Oh yeah. Like I'd want that. Good grief.
It amazes me that these guys tell us this in the first communication. Incredible.
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 169
sugar mommy?
Posted: 1/31/2012 6:28:51 PM

There is a myth out there among a certain type of male (absolutely not all!), that a widow has (1) just been left a good chunk of $$$ (2) is grieving, and therefore not as likely to *detect* them and, (3) must surely be missing the regular sex they used to get.


Same is true for those of us with dying parents and divorce settlements. My ex-fiance was a leech. I thought it was great that he was supportive as I went through the death of my mother and, a month later, my father, but I was warned by his sister in law that he helped the woman he was with before me to burn through a $60K inheritence she got from her parents...vacations, motorcycles, a house... When he came to me needing money and a place to live, I insisted on a cohabitation agreement in writing and promissory notes/collateral. When he was $3500 deep, I cut him off, so he started looking for his next sugar mama on POF. (ironically, that is how I learned about the site) I called his loans, sold the collateral and kicked his behind out.

Those men looking for a sugar teat are definitely out there...so be careful who you invite into your life.
 stellavixen
Joined: 2/17/2012
Msg: 171
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/6/2012 12:46:59 AM
I prefer to be a cougar.

They can't move in and must give equal pleasure.
 largo2
Joined: 12/13/2011
Msg: 172
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/6/2012 7:18:45 AM
^^^^^^^^^^^^

Any time Rip!
 Welsh474
Joined: 9/13/2010
Msg: 173
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/6/2012 7:40:19 AM
Well, there have been a few threads where someone has gone on and on about the wonderful world of women who marry up. It was even given as an option to finding a job in this poor economy - marry up. Some of us find this offensive and bordering on prostitution - just another way of a whore naming her price. The poster who suggested "marrying up" as an option just laughed it off - to me this shows lack of character.

A guy looking for a sugar mamma or a women looking for a sugar daddy is, in my opinion, pathetic and sad.
 ontario_woman
Joined: 4/3/2005
Msg: 174
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History
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/6/2012 7:46:03 AM

A guy looking for a sugar mamma or a women looking for a sugar daddy is, in my opinion, pathetic and sad.


I agree. IMHO, it's a form of prostitution. My love is not for sale.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 175
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/6/2012 11:10:16 AM

A guy looking for a sugar mamma or a women looking for a sugar daddy is, in my opinion, pathetic and sad.


No doubt.
 Blue-Eyes-Shine
Joined: 11/26/2008
Msg: 176
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History
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/6/2012 12:13:22 PM
I like my men sweet! Oh, wait, you were talking about money. Never mind. :)
 nativerock
Joined: 10/16/2010
Msg: 177
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/6/2012 1:26:09 PM

Wow sometimes i simply work for food


Ahh why sell yourself short? Go for the big money!! lol
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 178
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History
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/6/2012 9:34:34 PM
Prostitution is a profession like any other....and it's employees can be either male or female. I make no judgements......I just am "not hiring".
 Lionesse19
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 179
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/7/2012 6:10:01 AM
You mean guys your age want to move in and have you pay them for sex?? What a joke. You can get it free anytime, remind them. I dont imagine there are many women who would fall for that. A man would have to pay his way to have any respect to most of us. I dont want a man who is not equal to me with financial assets. I know of men who do move in with women who own their own houses but one would think they are paying the bills. You are too attractive to settle for some bludger who thinks he is doing you favours in bed.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 180
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/7/2012 7:38:42 AM

You mean guys your age want to move in and have you pay them for sex??


There are guys in every age bracket that look for desperate women who would give anything for an intimate relationship so they can prey on them. It doesn't make it typical.

It's a cold, hard fact that women outnumber men in the over 50 age group. There are about 10% more women in the 55 to 64 group and 38% more women in the 65+ group. Predators know that and also know they can find a willing target, they just need to keep trying.
 softshoe100
Joined: 8/3/2011
Msg: 181
view profile
History
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/7/2012 8:00:24 AM
Lol not looking for a sugar mommy at my age,lol but would consider being adopted.lol
 Rain587
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 182
sugar mommy?
Posted: 4/7/2012 10:23:49 AM
Why do men think women over 50 are desperate for someone to boink her?

I had the same 30 year old hitting on me until I finally blocked him. I didn't even respond after his initial post and my "no thank you" reply but he went on and on over why it would be good for both of us etc.

My profile is hidden from the public but I still get messages so assume it's people from the forums.
 mylookppp
Joined: 2/24/2012
Msg: 183
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/12/2012 9:47:34 PM
Dear i can understand what you mean, well they are lot of men out there that do not know what they want but i do and am looking for a soul-mate, a very honest and caring woman who is ready to love me for who i am......
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 184
view profile
History
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/14/2012 9:14:25 AM
Mylookppp, please grow up and be a "real" man......
 SelfGuidedLight
Joined: 9/12/2009
Msg: 185
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/14/2012 3:30:17 PM
I have had many such offers. There are plenty of women open to this in fact. It is a good and natural thing. The reality is that women control 70% of the wealth and therefore it seems logical that some wealthy (open minded) women will fall in love with financially strapped men (especially since many single men got cleaned out by and still support ex wives....hence the wealth gap). In fact, the ones that invited me to live with them were generally concerned only with 'who i am' and 'how i treat her'. The ones that balk at the general idea of it are typically the selfish ones you don't want anyway. I had one woman that i loved dearly, but once the topic of finances came up, it became apparent that she expected her 'ex' and myself were going to be covering all the expenses, while she lived a rather easy life.

To be honest, i am rather enjoying the 'strapped' perspective. The selfish women leave quickly.
 RosehipsAlberta
Joined: 4/20/2012
Msg: 186
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/15/2012 7:56:13 PM
Sure there are desperate women out there who want those young sweeties. You can recognize them ... they are the ones with wads of bubble gum stuck in their hair, the memory of their previous night's romp in bed.

I prefer someone who has lived long enough to understand what matters in life.
 RosehipsAlberta
Joined: 4/20/2012
Msg: 187
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/15/2012 7:59:00 PM
Sweetie, the Western "take" on soul mates are an invention.
the concept comes from yoga philosophy, and identifies two souls who want to accelerate their spiritual growth, turning away from things of this world ... therefore, the purpose of a soul mate is to make you so miserable that you give up on life.
The more chemistry there is, the more "challenges" there will be later on (what a tactful choice of words that author used).
 stellavixen
Joined: 2/17/2012
Msg: 188
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/15/2012 10:54:47 PM
Don't get cougar confused with sugar momma.

Pathetic... but some men think they are womens' gift... being delusional must be nice. eh?
 nativerock
Joined: 10/16/2010
Msg: 189
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/17/2012 5:37:48 AM

I had one woman that i loved dearly, but once the topic of finances came up, it became apparent that she expected her 'ex' and myself were going to be covering all the expenses, while she lived a rather easy life.


What kind of easy life is that? I think it is far easier to be self-supporting then you do not have to deal with temper tantrums.. We already raised our children and are enjoying a stress free life..


To be honest, i am rather enjoying the 'strapped' perspective. The selfish women leave quickly.

You do?? Just remember you never get something for nothing.. So make sure your sneakers are well laced lol

nativerock
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 192
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/17/2012 3:48:52 PM
SelfGuidedLight is guiding himself in the wrong direction. Most women who receive support payments do so because they made a lot less than their ex-spouses at the time of the divorce or they are being paid support for their children. My ex makes 3x my salary and is in the poorhouse not because of the pittance he pays in support, but because he is a reckless spender who takes lavish luxury vacations and lives off his credit cards.

I am financially stable and have no debt other than my house payment because I work hard, spend less than I make, avoid credit cards like the devil and invest well. It is not selfish to ask or expect that the person I invite into my life be at least as secure as I am...it is just plain smart. And before anyone moves in, there will be a cohabitation agreement or pre-nup. I started over from nothing once, I will do what it takes to protect what I have built. If a man wants a free ride, he can catch the bus next time he is in downtown Seattle.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 193
sugar mommy?
Posted: 5/17/2012 5:40:08 PM
Meaning absolutely no disrespect to selfguidedlight or stonegar,with no intent to be dismmissive of their concerns, I'd like to mention the other side of the coin with some aspects of the comments...

I am going to school at the age of 53 just so I can get back on my feet, and what i see is someone that is going to have issues with any man because she has worked so hard to get where she is and is afraid of losing that.


This is just sort of "thinking aloud' on my part, but because of your particular situation, perhaps your perception is colored by your current experiences?
Especially when dating from online personal ad sites. Its' one thing to date someone you've known awhile, or you know family or friends of the person,because then the situation of someone trying to get back on their feet can be independently confirmed. If it's someone out of the blue, someone that nothing is known about, I think women may be much more likely to proceed with extreme caution. Remember, for many of the 45+ crowd,especially the more rural/smalltown conservative people, online dating is still viewed with some skepticism.


I think life is too short to be concerned about such trivial things,

I can't begin to tell you how much I wish I could completely agree with you, but I've been witness to some situations where a"financial means imbalance" has left someone post-breakup/divorce facing the remainder of their life with a lot less financial stability.


as what good is being self-sufficient if there is noone to share your life with,

but there are other ways to share one's life without having to have a significant-other type of relationship...family, children, grandchildren, friends,their community.

your going to have a long boring and unhappy silver years if you do not open up and try to trust someone.

So the ONLY way to have a pleasant "silver years" is to latch onto a significant other relationship?
That's odd, because I happen to know a lot of unpartered "silver years" people who seem to be doing just fine.
Most of the reason I stick around this joint(PoF forums) is because IRL, I have very few friends of either gender who are single and looking to date, so this is where I come to observe and participate in discussions about dating and relationships and my experiences thereof.


I am, however saying that do not let your paranoia lead you to loneliness in the time when having a life partner is most important..........


I'm going to have to somewhat disagree with you on that point, as well. IMO,the time when having a partner is most important is when you are raising kids and building a life. When the kids are raised and a degree of financial stability has been achieved, even if it is a modest stability, a lot of people actually enjoy having more control and more autonomy in their lives,and if they happen to have become partnerless, they may certainly still be interested in finding a partner-but they will also consider what other alternatives are available if it becomes difficult to live independently. What do you suppose senior citizens do when their partner dies? Do they all rush out to line up another partner ASAP because "this is the time when having a life partner is most important"?

I'm going to be as frank as I can-I think someone is in a bit of a panic that their "silver years" may not go very well in some aspect(s) without a life partner. I can certainly unerstand that-but I have to give my opinion that relationship decisions made out of "being alone" anxiety are not always good decisions.


The key word is and always will be money so they can do as they please.........


Considering that in many cases it's money that they earned themselves, or gaining their financial stability has been a long and hard-fought battle,why shouldn't they do what they please. I think you will find that a lot of unpartnered women 45+ DID NOT get big alimony/child support payments,and raising their kids was a struggle. Not all unpartnered 45+ women who are widowed got a fat insurance check, settlement, or are drawing a big pension benefit.
As far as "so they can do as they please"-is there something WRONG with looking out for your own interests?

If you want a life partner so badly, then perhaps you should be approaching women who are in the same boat as you-getting back on their feet? It seems to me that they would appreciate having someone around who knows EXACTLY what they are going through. After all, it's the partnership that counts,right?

I say this in a spirit of debate and pointing out the other side of the story, I have no personal chagrin, nor is it my intent to disrespect your thoughts and concerns. I thoroughly appreciate how difficult it is to start over and be trying to get your feet back under you at a time when many of your peers are involved in planning their retirement life and activities. I hope that it goes well with you.
Cindy O
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