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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!      Home login  
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 Blonde_charm
Joined: 9/18/2007
Msg: 6
A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I know a man in his 20s with this problem. It ended our sexual relationship though he and I are friends. I could not get around it, and found it bizzare. Tried talking with him about it and he wouldn't talk back so ... I figure if he doesn't think its broke and doesn't want to fix it, why should I.
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 9
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/4/2008 8:55:32 AM
They need a full physical...to begin with

There are a lot of health issues that can cause inability to achieve an erection, or even maintain one...some are quite serious, heart problems, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc... then there are medications which has the effect of causing problems in this area.

BUT...if they don't think, or don't care how this affects their ability as a lover (much less their health) I would wonder just how mature and caring they really are.

good luck
 isspringhere
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 11
A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/4/2008 9:09:17 AM
sometimes just the pressure of a first time encounter will deflate the situation. That really sucks when that happens. But with good communication and getter each other relaxed, things will perk up and work just fine. And sometimes they rise without any prompting
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 15
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/4/2008 1:53:59 PM
I've never been with a man who couldn't ummm...rise to the occasion
 JustMary65
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 17
A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/4/2008 4:16:59 PM
I never had been with any man who had that problem until recently. Course I did discover that certain medications taken can effect his ability to sustain an erection, which was this particular person's problem. There are many reasons why some men suffer with ED, but if they are concerned about it they should speak to their doctor to find out exactly why it is happening.

He and I never could complete actual intercourse because as soon as he put the condom on he went limp, which was more frustrating for him than me. To combat the problem some men will use a c*ck ring to help them maintain enough blood flow to the erect penis so he can have intercourse, other's opt for oral copulation on themselves and their partners. There are no easy answers. Some men will opt for other medication which can help them maintain an erection ( viagra is popular). Course the guys who are in denial, because they can still achieve orgasm, won't do anything about it.

If you are in a sexual relationship one would hope you could discuss your concerns with your lover, but ED is a very sensitive issue for some men.
 then_what
Joined: 7/23/2007
Msg: 18
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/4/2008 5:58:36 PM
funny you should mention this . I am going through this with mybgf . He used to be diabetic but now has normal levels.
Even with Cialis/Viagra he goes limp if we take a break or change positions. It bugs the hel out of me since I consider myself fairly attractive and NEVER encountered this before, it kills me inside
sorry no advice here
 clasact
Joined: 1/18/2008
Msg: 20
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/4/2008 7:04:18 PM
Wonder if past alcohol and drug abuse would have anything to do with failure in this area? The one to which I refer has been "clean" for about 4 -1/2 years at this point. Just asking because I really hadn't seen this in the past. And he's in the age group to which OP refers. (late 40's) Just askin'.....................
 clasact
Joined: 1/18/2008
Msg: 28
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/5/2008 10:26:52 AM

usually those that are immature enough that talk themselves up usually can talk the talk but can not walk the walk....actions speak loader then words
Hmmm, you may have a point there.
Food for thought.
 Jet Fuel
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 29
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/5/2008 11:07:01 AM
I guess it is time for:

Viva Viagra
 Lacquered
Joined: 10/10/2006
Msg: 37
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/10/2008 5:00:34 PM

I've never heard of not being erect (limp) and still be able to orgasm and ejaculate...

I dont think it is quite "limp or flacid", I think that it didn't achieve FULL erection.... I'll leave that for the OP, to correct me if I am wrong, and then within say 3 or 4 strokes pop its over. fully possible!
I think anti-depressants are the worst, for this in younger men......... and I'm pretty sure it is a mental kick in the shorts for any man to experience ED....
For the OP to be left unsatisfied, maybe you should start with a toy, or oral, or fingers... or all of the above to help your man satisfy you, and mutually please each other.
There are so many ways to achieve sexual satisfaction with a partner that doesnt have to include the actual sex act ...... People just got to be willing to play and explore with each other.
But being able to communicate would be key here!!!!

Dreams
 satx78218
Joined: 10/30/2007
Msg: 40
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/11/2008 6:52:26 AM
Bad diet, no exercise, chronic sleep deficit, excess weight do wonders for destroying either gender's libido and sexual performance. Couple those with unresolved/excess stress, alcohol, many prescription drugs (depressed over your sex life? take they-don't-work anti-depressants and really kill it) that more and more people are existing on as goaded by BigPharma, and it's no wonder ED is becoming more widespread and at earlier ages.

Ha! pills that make you soft or hard? makes me think of a paraphrase of the old druggie/head song:

"One pill makes you softer
And one pill makes you "tall"
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all
Go ask Alice
When she’s ten feet tall"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hwWzbD_9Nfo

http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Go-Ask-Alice-lyrics-Jefferson-Airplane/9558CF5506258D5F48256D650010F27E

On top of the above "fragilizing" problems, men have another problem not of their self-infliction and beyond their reach. That is the preponderance of estrogen analogs in foods and packaging that are mimic real estrogen sufficiently that the man's body is fooled. Excess (there is always some) estrogen and estrogen analogs (from plastics) in men cause loss of libido (reduced/absent sexual desire) and ED (slow to erection, incomplete/absent erection), loss of muscle mass/strength, etc. Sperm count and motility also go through the floor, if you're trying to have a kid. Excess estrogen, natural or synthetic, literally "de-mans" a man.

Another hardness killer, more or less directly/implicitly from the women, is "performance anxiety". Women can fake the performance, men can't.

It's quite illuminating that women are ready to reject a man only for impotency but the BBWs (Blubbery Badder Woman) think it's unfair, cruel to be ignored/rejected only because they are fat. Both problems are mostly curable, but only one is publicly egregious. ( hey, men at least have an advantage some where! )
 heaight
Joined: 9/6/2007
Msg: 42
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A man's lack of ability to Rise to the Occasion!
Posted: 6/11/2008 9:59:08 AM
i dunno about a guy not being erect at all and ejaculating, but u can be somewhat erect and do it.... it could also be the age the guy is at.. ukno parts tend to malfunction with age, cut the guys some slack and fulfill those sexual needs with a younger guy.
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