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 Lola_Milano
Joined: 12/26/2007
Msg: 3
CROSSDRESSINGPage 1 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
More common than you realize. Support the cause. Instead of walking around in the woods, try walking around in public some time. Just like they had to get used to people of color and gays, they need to get used to seeing us. After you conquer your fear, you'll have a really fun time with it.
 Lola_Milano
Joined: 12/26/2007
Msg: 4
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/14/2008 3:29:26 AM
Oh yeah....and I like the women I date to wear smaller panties than I do. Don't be so frickin rude Ms. Manly Man.
 Leeanne
Joined: 10/14/2005
Msg: 5
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History
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/14/2008 5:22:14 AM
OP I hope that your wife is as understanding about you seeking sexual encounters outside of your marriage as she is about your crossdressing! You are blessed that she is your friend in supporting your desires!
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 9
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History
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/14/2008 12:04:55 PM
The first time I crossdressed in front of my SO was the end of the relationship; while she originally said she would 'tolerate' it, when she actually had to face it she couldn't do it. The horrified look on her face told it all. It wasn't even my idea; she just told me that if I felt comfortable that way, I should just wear what I wanted to wear. I foolishly took her up on it, which turned out to be a big mistake. Had I kept my crossdressing private, we probably would still be together. When we discussed it with a therapist, she said it changed everything. I later discovered that when we fall in love, we have a certain 'image' of our beloved that we create in our minds based on what we know of them, and it's that image we fall in love with. Seeing her man as a female in any way can be completely destructive to that 'manly' image, and often kills off any sexual desire for him, which can be the beginning of the end of that relationship. Talking about it is one thing; actually dressing up in full female regalia, and presenting myself to her is a completely different level. I won't dress up in front of a partner again unless she initiates it.
 sweetazeyes
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 14
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/15/2008 1:06:11 AM
i am only into crossdressing when being dominated sexually by a woman.i'm straight and just like the pwer exchange/role swapping aspect.
 Lola_Milano
Joined: 12/26/2007
Msg: 16
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/15/2008 5:40:33 AM

So....WTF are you? Pick a team already.


There in lies the problem. You've mistakenly assumed that clothing determines sexual orientation. Crossdressers (gender dysphoria, more clinically correct) have the same orientations as the rest of society - some are hetero; some are bi; some are gay. We come from all parts of society. I have friends that pilot supertankers, airline pilots, healthcare, artists, military (special forces), technology, mechanics, police, just about everything you can imagine. Gender dysphoria is not specific to men either. I know women that crossdress as men.

I know it’s a shame we don’t fit neatly into one of your categories, but such is the way of the world. Interestingly enough, most gays are just as perplexed about us as are the straights.

Yes, everyone is entitled to their opinion, but you don’t have to be rude about it.
 dogs rule
Joined: 10/12/2007
Msg: 18
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/16/2008 11:16:41 AM
Another crossdressing thread? Didn't we already go through this?

OP why are you on a dating site if you have a wife that is open to you looking like a woman?


There in lies the problem. You've mistakenly assumed that clothing determines sexual orientation.

Hate to tell you but if your looking for intimate encounters with bi men then your gay!
 Patarey
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 19
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/16/2008 11:22:52 AM
Mine didn´t go for that kind of play...........
 mthomjmark
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 24
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/16/2008 2:03:08 PM
It sure in the hell isn't common; Not one of my friends does it and don't tell me how do you know or yes its common.

Be like Lisa; if it feels good do it; If you want to try animals, or orgies or whatever just do it; be you! oh brother.


I think you need help myself. Any women that says act like a woman and dress up like one, will be blown off so quick it will make her head spin. I'm a man, not boy george.
 Sardonis
Joined: 9/28/2007
Msg: 26
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/16/2008 2:45:25 PM
There was a Halloween in college when me and some buddies all bought women's dresses from the Good Will and wore them out drinking and acting like fools. It was all in good fun.

But for a man to seriously walk around dressed like a woman trying to feel "desirable", that's just weird.

I can't imagine anything more unattractive, and just plain bizarre, than a man dressed up like a woman trying to look sexy. And they have that look on their face which is pathetically asking, "Do you think I'm sexy?"

Hell NO!!!
 val0214
Joined: 5/7/2007
Msg: 28
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/16/2008 9:45:34 PM
The movies,

Precilla, Queen of the Nile.

The cross dresser was Mr. Smith in the Matrix.

The director liked to cross dress and that's how he noticed the actor in the first movie.

Go figure!
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 31
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History
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/17/2008 12:31:27 AM

Unfortunately, most men don't look that great as a cross-dresser. Most of them need serious coaching from women willing to teach them not only how to dress, but effective mannerisms as well.

See, I think that's part of the problem. As much as we'd like to, for most of us, our build and bone structure prevents us from looking as nice as we'd like to, not to mention availability of nice clothing in our sizes. And no matter how you wear it, or how you behave, a beautiful gown isn't going to ever look as good on a 'Danny Devito' type body as it will on a 'Heidi Klum' body. And of course, we move differently too, again, because our bodies are proportioned differently. And when lot of guys try to emulate the mannerisms of the opposite sex, and go overboard doing it, they wind up becoming caricatures of what they're trying be. As much as I feel like I'm supposed to be pretty and feminine, I also know that it's just not going to happen, no matter what I wear.
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 36
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CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/18/2008 5:39:27 AM

crossdressers are considered the annoying little sisters of the trans and queer community

Not to everyone; few people understand all the various ways of expressing gender. Many gays I've known tell me I'm really gay but don't know it, they don't understand it either. Some accept what I explain to them, some don't. Like anything else, you get a full spectrum of responses when you tell someone you cross dress.

Usually, there is sexual appeal in dressing as a woman.

No, that's transvestism, crossdressing for sexual excitement. And if he's still 'exploring feminine ways', he's still kind of 'in stage one'. After a while, we know what we are feeling when we dress up.


Unfortunately, a lot of cross dressers crossdress in secret.... Our world needs to accept that not everyone fits into the two straight and narrow gender categories of 'male = man' and 'female=woman'. If you're honest with yourself, then you'll be able to find a partner who already knows this about when you first start dating and will accept it.

Easy to say, difficult to do. society is still far away from accepting crossdressing as even remotely normal. For those of us who do it, the chances of finding a woman who is attracted to us is also remote. I've been alone now for ten years; when AOL first started their match making, I had an ad up. Lots of responses. I later changed the ad, only to add at the end that I was a cross dresser. Zero responses other than one prostitute and some guys. None. Zip. And that was when they had over 20 million members. It's been pretty much the same since; I've been on match, loveaccess, true, date, all sorts of mating sites including the alternative sites. Other than professional sex workers and guys looking for crossdressers, I'm not getting many bites. Basically, we're fighting human nature. Women are generally attracted to typical alpha male behavior and traits, and repulsed by the opposite. Guys who don female attire are embracing feminine traits, which turns off the attraction. Sure, there will always be a few who go against the grain, but that's all there are, a few. Not nearly enough to go around for the 2.5 percent of all males who crossdress.

My advice is to be open about it with yourself and your world as soon as you're aware of it.

Sure as long as you're willing to live a life being ridiculed behind your back as well as in front of it. There's still a huge stigma to cross dressing. Not to mention the loonies that try to trap us and kill us (which you will find in the news periodically). The world isn't ready, or accepting of people who aren't what they consider 'normal'. Gay people know this too, but at least they can find a mate. There are no straight girl-crossdresser bars, clubs, or websites. No where for us to go. And it's real hard fighting the good fight, when you're always all alone.
 richard.rustopecker
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 38
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/18/2008 12:17:15 PM
I am a crossdresser anyone interested message me
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 40
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/18/2008 12:45:42 PM
~OP~ Hang on to that amazing woman. I think you'll find that very few understand the concept and that makes it yicky. Open-minds are few and far between....at least here in the States. Personally ~ I have my own list of "out of the norm" scenerios (kinks by some standards) therefor, I don't judge anyone on who they are or what they choose to do. JMO
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 49
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CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/18/2008 11:14:41 PM
Nah, you wouldn't be the world's least passable crossdresser. Just stop over by dateacrossdresser dot com and see for yourself; and, despite the name, there's not a single female over there (where are all these women that will date us, anyway???).
Hey, I look like a fullback in a halter top and skirt. The only way I pass is if you hike me the ball.
 BrokenMemories
Joined: 4/1/2008
Msg: 52
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/19/2008 5:37:56 PM
totally not into that & it is something that would put an end to the relationship
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 54
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CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/19/2008 6:50:58 PM

So far all of the cross dressers that spent years learning how to use the slot on your "tighty whiteys" you are willing to throw all that practice away?

Yup. Besides, not all men's briefs have that. Lots of 'em don't, in fact.
 mthomjmark
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 58
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/23/2008 2:19:17 PM

any women that wants a man that likes to wear womens clothes has just as many issuses as the man himself thats nasty and gay. I like a real manly man!!!!! If hes into that hes defintly gotta have at least gay tendencies.


Fancyface; right on; I agree totally
 gonzofanmel
Joined: 10/3/2006
Msg: 59
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CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/23/2008 3:23:52 PM
Methinks some people who crow the loudest against it are the ones truly insecure with their sexuality. They can't accept the idea that for some, the lines between "feminine" and "masculine" can be blurred, even crossed, and it doesn't mean the person is mental.

I think it's a shame that people have such tunnel views as to what is "masculine" and "feminine"; it seems that anytime there is someone out there who challenges it and doesn't fit into the neat little boxes, then they get labeled as weirdoes and perverts, or are given some other negative feedback. Just because someone likes to wear something that society deems is meant for the opposite sex doesn't mean the person is sick and needs help, and doesn't mean they are unable to represent the usual (ridiculous) stereotypes that go along with that particular gender when needed.

Personally, I like a person who is willing to challenge the norm and be who they are, stereotypes aside. I spent quite a few years getting to know some cross-dressers, and I think only 10% of them were either gay or bi-sexual.

As for me......coming from an extensive theater background, as well as a diehard David Bowie fan (I have a pic on my wall of his album cover from "The Man Who Sold the World" that I drool over), I have to say I would be open to the option of dating a man who liked to cross-dress. I don't think it makes him any less of a man or less "masculine" because he likes to dress up.

I think it takes a real man to wear women's clothes.


 o76923
Joined: 11/3/2007
Msg: 60
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/23/2008 4:17:30 PM
Here Here Gonzo! It's kinda sad that more people can't accept the notion of a gender continuum. I admit it's a tough concept to grasp that gender is more than your private parts.

But I actually have a nice success story on this one. I started cross-dressing in little steps, a purse because it was convenient, nail polish to be silly, then to jewlery and skirts. Now I wear a nice mish-mash of male items (boxers, a beard and mustache) and female items (a purse, hat, sunglasses, and skirt some days). I'm not dressing like a girl to feel sexy or because I'm gay (I have been bicurious-ish for years). I just do it because it feels nice and I happen to look good dressed up (probably because of the extra effort).

And I don't know if it's some sort of enormous coincidence but I pretty much get treated the same as before from either friends or strangers. Nobody looks and gawks, people still talk to me as much as they did. The only comment I ever get are some of my less secure male friends (ok so they're really insecure, but oh well) constantly seek reassurance that I'm wearing something under it.

Oh, and in regards to the person who claimed to be the least passible cross dresser? Not even close. Rudy Giuliani. No contest.
 Lola_Milano
Joined: 12/26/2007
Msg: 61
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/24/2008 10:49:04 AM
Awesome Gonzo! You hit the nail squarely on the head. It’s always refreshing to see posts from intelligent people who actually have some knowledge of the subject matter rather than ignorant opinions based upon archaic stereotypes.
 Lola_Milano
Joined: 12/26/2007
Msg: 62
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/24/2008 11:09:54 AM

any women that wants a man that likes to wear womens clothes has just as many issuses as the man himself thats nasty and gay. I like a real manly man!!!!! If hes into that hes defintly gotta have at least gay tendencies.



Fancyface; right on; I agree totally


What's that, you totally agree? You like a real manly man also? ....hope you can take a joke, but if not, oh well. You should have seen that one coming. It is rather curious that you're reading posts on cross-dressing though. Had to switch threads because it's no longer fashionable or acceptable to bash minorities and gays?
 o76923
Joined: 11/3/2007
Msg: 63
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/24/2008 4:08:22 PM
Oh, you can still bash whatever minority you want, you just have to make sure it's in a forum "friendly" to your views. After two or three pages, you can tell whether a forum is fact based or crazy-ranting. It all depends how many people shout down the other side. If you get a post where it's all about the arab terrorists are raising oil prices, it's safe to blame them queer-o-sexuals too. But if you're on a forum saying how global warming must be stopped, maybe they'd best move along.
 Krystall Love
Joined: 5/22/2008
Msg: 64
CROSSDRESSING
Posted: 6/24/2008 6:12:45 PM
i've been cross dressing since i was an early teen,got into my mom's clothes.i have no reason or explaination why or how i started i just did.i did it often over the years and slowly acquired my own clothes.i didn't really try the sexual experimentation while being even partially cross dressed until my early 30's.after my marriage broke apart-had nothing to do with my cross dressing-i slowly evolved into teh completet transformation into being fully femme.and that is when i started to experience i could only have sex with anyone while being dressed,again i have no explaination.i know i am lucky have a body shaped the way i do to the fact i can make many women jealous when i'm out-mainly because i have long legs and small feet-,yes i do go out en femme.
as for the labeling thing,those belong on boxes.society is so closed minded.i've been a memeber here at POF for just over a month and at least half the e-mails or profile views are by straight men that have no desires with bi encounters,but the want to take me out.why is that?i find woman are more open minded to us than most men.i have been out to straight regular clubs with a few women and they get pissed at me because the guys will approach me first,could it be the way i dress?i politly explain about me to them.mind you many men harbour homosexual thoughts and if they are to act on them it is easier with a girl like us.
crossdressers/t-girls seem to be in a realm of our own as most gay men don't like us because we represent a woman to them.straight guys don't like us well because they start thing whet it would be like spending some time with us.
guess i better stop this i'll be writing all night.whatever you like or do just do it to best of your ability.

Krystall
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