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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Why are women more open than men?? about SEX      Home login  
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 DAVE632
Joined: 6/17/2006
Msg: 2
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Why are women more open than men?? about SEXPage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
""I sure hope ALL men aren't like that.""

They're NOT.
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 3
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Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/28/2008 11:19:50 PM
I think it often has to do with the conditioning we receive. We are consistently admonished for thinking/talking about it. "Is that all you ever think about?" "Sex starts way before the bedroom!" "Am I just a piece of meat to you?" "Look me in the eyes, not at my cleavage!" etc. etc. etc.

As well, we are constantly reminded that it is not our decision, it is the woman's. It's just assumed we're ready for it and is only a question of when she will be ready.

In other words, after all the negativity and grief men are given, they become somewhat aloof....or at least try to put on an air of disinterest in order to appear that it doesn't matter so as to avoid hearing comments such as those I mentioned. Once the relationship develops though, and the couple becomes intimate and loving, I think the dialogue becomes more equal as we are more comfortable and trusting that we won't be belittled for our thoughts, feelings and outlooks on the subject. JMO.



~ds~
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 4
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Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/28/2008 11:44:49 PM
Well, people are attracted to the image they create of the person they are attracted to by what they know of that person. Shatter that image, and attraction can be destroyed as well. Lots of women remain attracted to a man even though he is unfaithful, sometimes for years, until they find out. Women are also married to crossdressers and transvestites, and are fine with the relationship until they find out, which kills the masculine image they had of him. Then the attraction is gone. For me, if I admit to a woman that I like to wear women's clothing, that usually shatters the attraction immediately as well. So, for a guy, confessing to any type of fantasy that might be construed in any way to his being less than perfectly masculine, is a risk most aren't willing to take, and for good reason. Why 'fess up to something that isn't likely to ever happen if it will destroy what you already have, as long as you can live with keeping it just a fantasy? There are lots of fantasies that should stay just that. Private fantasies. And, most of the time reality can't live up to the fantasy anyway.
 rebel777
Joined: 3/22/2007
Msg: 5
Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/28/2008 11:45:59 PM
I received alot of negativity in my marriage,when it came to disscusing sex..hell I didn't even mention it at all after awhile...there was just so much that she would'nt try and or do,very boring,I discovered porn and started masturbating with my left hand cause I wore out my right hand in my teens and 20s'.... ..is that open enough for ya...
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 6
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Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/29/2008 2:19:59 AM
When you're telling your partner about your likes, dislikes, and fantasies, your partner is thinking to himself.......

I can do that... I could do that.... I could do that too.... OH NO, she wants to do that ?
 Henry L. Moon
Joined: 6/1/2008
Msg: 7
Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/29/2008 11:24:22 AM
Hon, you are 25 years old ....just how many fantasies and whatnot will kids your age have?...No offense, but this is the time for you to MAKE them!
 mcbobly
Joined: 8/28/2005
Msg: 8
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Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/29/2008 1:53:41 PM

""I sure hope ALL men aren't like that.""

They're NOT

Exactly. I for one love to be completely open and upfront about the whole experience. That way it can and will be as enjoyable as possible for both of us. If both parties are not as open as they should be or talk about it, later on it might lead to problems. So I have found open communication and talking about our likes, dislikes, fantasies and wants and needs are important. So not ALL men are like that, just the uptight ones.
 Henry L. Moon
Joined: 6/1/2008
Msg: 9
Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/29/2008 4:54:23 PM
Ownership????.....is this some sort of fantasy?
 heaight
Joined: 9/6/2007
Msg: 10
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Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/30/2008 10:53:50 AM
im not really afraid of talking about things i might like to try to my girl, but i think one reason for some guys being like that is because society has taught girls to be more open about that kinda stuff, and guys kinda got the short end of the stick with being open to expressing themselves with anything that might feel good to us. e.i. we cant express feelings and stuff, because everyone has taught us, it would make u weak, and any secrete fantasy other than the norm(3 somes, etc.) might have people look at u different, like a creep/wierdo/homo.
but most of us would pay to see a chick engage in any of those things..
 Sapphireeyes
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 11
Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 6/30/2008 11:16:51 PM
I think it is cause if he tells you something you wont be willing to do...then he realizes he might freak you out and risk losing you all together.

IE...a woman might want to make love in the rain, or be tied up...a man might want a night with ALL the Dallas cheerleaders. You are probably talking about fantasies that are DOABLE...to a man they arent really fantasies...cause they are DOABLE..to them a fantasy is something they might never really get to do and if they tell you they want to be blindfolded and then gang banged by a group of 70 year old biker chicks you might think they are to wacked out.
 opnmydm
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 12
Why are women more open than men?? about SEX
Posted: 7/1/2008 7:05:53 AM
your finding the odd man...i find that more women tend to clam it up about sex and their likes and dislikes, their willingness to experiament..toys and the like..but i truely feel the ladies just keep it bottled up, but they are open, the men who say they are not intoerested are truely not..hmmm
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