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 AUTHOR
 Fun_Jess
Joined: 6/15/2006
Msg: 1
Are we done??Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I feel sort of silly but go easy on me.
I ended up hooking up with one of my first loves in college. I was scared the first time because of all the emotion and stopped seeing him. Six year later we run into each other and were spending every weekend together, he wants to take me to meet his family. I don't fall for lines normally but he said after a month he already loved me and to tell you the truth I felt stronger for this guy then I did for a guy I was with for over three years so for the first time in my life I beleived him. Well this is my fist time dealing with crazy feelings making me go crazy and we went up to cobourg got in a fight I slept in my car because a girl he told me about before that he really liked was there and he forgot to mention it was his best friends sister. She was supposed to sleep in the room with us. I got upset. I slept in my car. He came apologizing to me and i forgave him till i noticed all of his texts were deleted except on from that damn girl saying sorry i fell asleep ad him saying its okay maybe next time. Well am so ashamed I hit him and cried because that day he was telling me how we were meant to be together and in the first time in my life I believed it. I broke his phone too and i have never done anything like that before, after all that he begged me to take him back and i did he came to my house we made up he wanted to sleep over but my roomate was coming home so we made plans for canadas wonderland the next day. He texts me says jesse wants him to do some work. I find out hes with a bunch of girls partying it up i just found out right now so i didn't confront him because he stopped calling the last thing he said was that he had to think about things and would call me when he got back from his camping trip, he didn't go he went on a double date to toronto island while i sat here so sick thinking of him. Normally I would flip out and be done with it but I love this guy so much and i feel that when i hit him and broke his phone maybe that was it in his mind but i was so done and he begged me to come back just to never talk to me again. I am in so much agony, this is the first time i've ever gone through anything like this and i feel like i deserve it for going postal but i was so hurt that he lied. I don't know what to do. I feel more strongly for this guy then I did with a guy for 3 years. He hasn't even called all week and he has cute pics with these girls. What should I do how do I move on??? I dont even have friends anymore. This is affecting every area of my life. I feel like I'm going crazy and i'm really scared. Please help me.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 3
Are we done??
Posted: 7/7/2008 7:07:48 AM
Jess, since you have time on your hands now, you really really need to do yourself a favor and answer this question:

Are you really into a guy who seems to be fooling around

OR

are you really more interested in the emotional rush of being CRAZY IN LOVE?

You talk about how good it feels, never been better, and you do wild things you wouldn't normally do, when it gets challenged. It sounds like an addict denied their drug, no offense intended. The good news is, if its true, then you can solve it. Rather than chase a dead relationship, you can find out how you fell this deep into love, and find a healthier relationship in which to get that wonderful rush all over again.
 UR 2 girls away from 3sum
Joined: 12/23/2007
Msg: 4
Are we done??
Posted: 7/7/2008 4:59:00 PM
For fawk's sake ... Sounds like he is done with you! Get some balls - oops, ovaries and suck it up! You fawked up. He doesn't want you, you are rejected, get over it, move on! (in that order)
 curlygrl
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 5
Are we done??
Posted: 7/7/2008 5:53:50 PM
Bad behavior should be called for what it is and not be sugarcoated. Have respect for other people's property is something I learned when I was 9. She is 25.

Thats all sweet that your 25 and poor Jess he pushes your buttons and blah blah
blah- Do you always react like this- do you always destroy things, hit guys?
Your behavior is just as bad as if HE hit you. I know people can get us to the
point but you need to look at yourself. You also need to stay away from him. He is
not for you and you are not for him no matter how much you try to convince
yourself.

I think you need to seek something when it comes to not getting your way. I
think you have a little temper problem and you need to either control it or
get help or the next guy you fall madly in love with smacks your little ass
with a restraining order.

The ones on top of me might hold your hand but you need to really look
at this Jess- your not a little girl anymore who can get her way and what she
wants or get people to do what YOU want. Wake up Jess before you meet
the wrong person who does not think twice calling you on your actions.
 Audi-girl
Joined: 3/29/2008
Msg: 6
Are we done??
Posted: 7/7/2008 6:11:15 PM
"The best way to get over a man is to get under another man" ..

We can all use a little humor to brighten our darkest days...

Tomorrow is another day and you will realize that everyone comes into your life for a season, a reason or a life. Your mission in life is to figure out which it is. Sounds to me this guy was for a reason.


Good luck to you.
 curlygrl
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 7
Are we done??
Posted: 7/7/2008 7:03:28 PM
Oh get real. Is PMS the same as Rage? Can we use that as an excuse to destroy stuff too?

I agree- really really bad excuse. We are responsible for our actions.
Jess- you need to learn from this- every time someone pushes your buttons
you can't react like this. Tantrum days are over. In the real world this
can cause you some major problems with guys- Like ones who hit back.
Get a grip and close the door on this and while your at it get some help
with some stuff. Dont tell me you dont have a problem. You do. Maybe
the beginning of a problem so take care of it.


Regardless of how he acted, he is imature, whatever- its YOUR reaction that
counts and it was a bad one.
 Moonchild51
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 8
view profile
History
Are we done??
Posted: 7/8/2008 8:30:53 AM

In the real world this
can cause you some major problems with guys- Like ones who hit back


Curly? Very very good point indeed! Actually scary to be honest. OP hun? Learn from this experience and move on. One bad action does not justify another bad "re-action" hun.
 pokerjimmy
Joined: 11/10/2006
Msg: 9
view profile
History
Are we done??
Posted: 7/8/2008 8:52:05 AM
Everyone already told you it's over so you don't need another one of those.

The best thing to do now is date lots of guys and don't get serious with any of them. You're vulnerable now and need time to heal. Power dating will help get your mind off of what you had and remind you there are lots of men out there with way better qualities who'll treat you better.

Of course you'll see lessor men as well, but lots of dating is the answer for you now.
 clubkid66
Joined: 7/6/2005
Msg: 10
view profile
History
Are we done??
Posted: 7/8/2008 11:36:17 AM
Yes. What kind of relationships work with this kind of madness going on? Only in movies.
 Fun_Jess
Joined: 6/15/2006
Msg: 11
Are we done??
Posted: 7/9/2008 5:18:15 AM
UPDATE: WERE DONE BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE.

so he begged for my forgivness after I did all this I said no but eventually gave in, he stayed at my house, wanted to stay over more but I said it wasn't a good idea, we had plans to go to algonquin park i had my things ready, he told me how much he loved me and then left, were were supposed to go to wonderland the next day, he told me he had to work, i found out and saw pictures of him with girls, then he never even called for algonqin park and i saw pictures of them together very very close. Its my fault ok? My ****ing heart is broken and I did it to myself. I'm normally more agressive but I don't even care anymore if he wants to be with others as long as I have a small part of him. I have never even loved anyone in my life. I've never felt like this before I did not know your heart actually hurts. He has not bothered calling or anything. I don't know what to do I'm feeling unstable. its hard to wake up in the morning
 Fun_Jess
Joined: 6/15/2006
Msg: 12
Are we done??
Posted: 7/9/2008 5:20:02 AM
Me doing that I will regret it the rest of my life, I lost the one person I've ever cared about at all because of my behavior fate brought him in to my life and i ruined it, how do i live with that?
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 13
Are we done??
Posted: 7/31/2008 10:46:44 PM
Jess stop beating yourself up - girl you deserve a better quality of man. Just think of him as dog poop on the sidewalk......you have 2 choices, step over it and continue on, or step in it and then you need to clean up the mess. Take choice #1 - why wreck a good pair of shoes - lol.

Here are some things for you to think about............these are things I try and live by:

1. Always be classy - never be crazy (ok so you were a bit crazy, think of that experience as your one mistake, never to repeat). He is really not worth the time, effort and engery - let his mom repremand him, you are too busy looking for the next man who will and can appreciate you.

2. You deserve better, he is not worthy of your time, love or attention. Remember he is the dog poop you are stepping over.................find someone who will not treat you that way.

3. Learn from your experience and be more careful next time. Remember a man who loves you, will not make you cry tears of unhappiness.

4. Don't let this affect the other areas of your life - the only thing that happened is that this jerk, mistreated you and took advantage of your feelings for him. Stand in front of your mirror, smack yourself on the forehead, smile at yourself and say "Girlfriend, I'm never going to be taken advantage of, like this again". Now, let it go and move forward.

All the best in your next relationship..................I know it will be better for you, because you are smarter than you were when you hooked up with that jerk.....you the one.....old what's his name that you are too busy to worry about.
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