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 secret_agent_thing
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 3
Playing Hard To GetPage 1 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
No, just makes me think you're not that interested. I can't speak for other guys but I don't like playing games like this. If you're interested in someone whats so wrong with actually showing you're interested.
 867love
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 6
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 1:36:54 PM
o/p -i would think she was playing the field and not too interested. (and its quite easy to tell if she is truely captivated) if you watch, you can find plenty of women who are these elusive social butterflies. -they crave attention and fun, however not from one person. -she usually goes home alone -leaving her new found suiters wondering what they did wrong.
since i'm not a "take a number and wait" kind of guy -i usually stay out of that dance. -life is too short to play head games.
 Montreal_Guy
Joined: 3/8/2004
Msg: 8
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Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 1:43:12 PM

If I meet a guy and we go out, I will call the next day and say I had a good time or something along those lines. I will not call every day because that makes me seem desperate and craving for attention and I imagine would begin to bother him.


I think for many men that would be true, actually.


If I dont hear anything from him in a day or two I will usually send a text or call to say hi. If after those two attemps he hasnt called, I take it he's not interested and therefore I cease contact. If he wants to go out again he knows my number. Am I right in this or is there something I am missing?


Sounds great, to me.


Does it necessarily mean he isnt interested if he doesnt call within a couple of days from my phone call?


Not necessarily, he may be busy with things like work, or need some time alone to review his feelings. Don't forget we guys have the same problem, you know.

Call too often, and you may come across wrong. Don't call, and she'll move on to other things.

Not just a female problem, in the end.

The "plays hard to get" type of woman is a huge turn off to me, honestly. If someone's not around, then I typically go "NEXT ! " .
 secret_agent_thing
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 10
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 1:58:42 PM

Ok John, well how do show a woman you are interested in seeing her again? What signs or subtle hints do you give?


Well I don't know John's answer but if I want to show a woman that I'm interested in seeing her again my subtle hint or sign is me saying "Hey, I'm interested in seeing you again"
 godliketoaster
Joined: 2/18/2008
Msg: 12
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 3:45:29 PM
It pisses me off. Plain and simple, if someone is interested in my they better show it to my face, if not. I will probably lose interest in them.
 spiderette
Joined: 6/28/2008
Msg: 13
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 4:23:53 PM
if the other party likes you enough, there's no need to play hard-to-get. playing hard-to-get may work to a degree if the other party is vacillating. it won't work at all if the other party just isn't interested.
 es138
Joined: 4/9/2006
Msg: 16
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 5:03:03 PM
It's nice to feel that a girl isn't gonna become totally infatuated with me after the first few dates.
 ForumFilly
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 17
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 5:04:04 PM
From a woman's point of view, if I had to play hard to get to achieve a man's interest, I wouldn't want to get to know him. I don't want to meet a man who is into being manipulated. I want a man who knows what he wants... me, and isn't afraid of me showing him affection and vice versa. Playing hard to get or any other head games is a sign of immaturity. If a man is intimidated by my interest in him, then he, obviously, is the wrong man for me. I refuse to play games and be coy. If I am interested in a man, believe me, he knows it.
 fourletterfame
Joined: 5/13/2008
Msg: 18
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 5:16:33 PM
The best trick to getting a woman to amp up her game is to pretend you aren't interested. Shooting a smile and then letting the trail go cold drives women mad and will make them try twice as hard to get your attention. Women are (no offense) vain by nature, and so the idea that this man smiled but suddenly isn't interested is impossible to fathom, it's a rather effective tool in determining a womans level of commitment to getting you're attention.
 ca-soldier
Joined: 7/3/2008
Msg: 19
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 5:49:21 PM
NO!! Plaing hard to get, is just that< PLAYING!! its a game, and Im sorry but its not good enough for me. Not to be mean, but I'm just not into childish games
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 22
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/7/2008 7:52:59 PM
As far as I'm concerned, any woman who plays the least bit hard to get, can sit home waiting forever for me to call.
 fetish4u
Joined: 4/18/2007
Msg: 23
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Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 1:26:18 AM
I hate when women play hard to get.I want someone that isn't afraid to come up and smack me on the butt and say lets go out this weekend.
 Greyfeld
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 24
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Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 1:54:08 AM

Do u personality like it when a gurl plays "hard to get" as she hardly or occasionally calls u, asks u to chill with her, doesn't majority of the time show affection. Does this result in you wanting to get to know her more on a romantically level because she's not "instantly available" for you?


Ya.... no. I'm not in middle school anymore. If the girl acts uninterested, then I'm going to assume she's not interested and move on.
 Sapphireeyes
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 25
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 2:38:55 AM

The best trick to getting a woman to amp up her game is to pretend you aren't interested. Shooting a smile and then letting the trail go cold drives women mad and will make them try twice as hard to get your attention. Women are (no offense) vain by nature, and so the idea that this man smiled but suddenly isn't interested is impossible to fathom, it's a rather effective tool in determining a womans level of commitment to getting you're attention.


I might be vain by nature, but that *trick wouldnt work on me, I would think you are (gasp) playing me which is manlipulation. I think most people resent being manlipulated. Or i would think you saw someone else you were more interested in and then I would back off even more. I think it is silly to expect someone to compete for you. You either like a person or you dont and trying to make someone jealous is just lame.

If I like a man Ill show him, I dont feel comfortable calling unless they ask me to cause most men are busy working etc.
 fourletterfame
Joined: 5/13/2008
Msg: 26
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 6:21:28 AM

I might be vain by nature, but that *trick wouldnt work on me, I would think you are (gasp) playing me which is manlipulation. I think most people resent being manlipulated. Or i would think you saw someone else you were more interested in and then I would back off even more. I think it is silly to expect someone to compete for you. You either like a person or you dont and trying to make someone jealous is just lame.


That's more than a little asinine. Good for you.
 MX220
Joined: 3/31/2007
Msg: 27
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 6:37:30 AM
Pepsi76:

*Ok then, what are signs you look for in a woman that shows they are interested? *

-Returning phone calls.
-Showing a genuine interest in the conversation. Asking me questions.
-Subtle or brief touching.
-Laughing a lot.
-Teasing me.
-A female friend told me once that the best sign is simply a woman touching a guy's arm...Is that true ladies?

*What signs do you give off?*

-See above^.
-Asking her out for a second date.
-Offering to fix that light switch or leaky faucet in her house. If I offer to reside her house I really dig her!
__________
Most guys will interpret playing hard to get as 'not interested'. If she's really just playing hard to get it means she's not going to put in any effort whatsoever. She's just testing you to find how much work a guy will do to get a date with her. It's all about her ego. You'll to be at her beck and call all of the time.
 Akutenshi
Joined: 11/26/2007
Msg: 29
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Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 8:27:09 AM
I treat people the way they treat me, so, acting uninterested will get the same result back from me.

But thats just me i guess.
 pokerjimmy
Joined: 11/10/2006
Msg: 30
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Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 8:45:22 AM
I love people tired of "games" You may be tired, but if you don't play...you're outtie!

Look, the games are another name for courtship and it's been going on forever. Wouldn't we all just like to have what we want and skip movies, dinner sout...flowers...dancing in lame clubs paying too much for drinks you fill in the kabookie dance, but skip the games...i.e. courtship and you often skip the person you want.

Hard to get is great if you're being chased. It however is a game that has to be played well when played. In other words...you're making moves while making sure he's chasing you. Just make sure when you look over your shoulder he's still chasing or you overplayed the game and lost.
 SpiceyCougar
Joined: 4/29/2008
Msg: 31
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 8:46:15 AM

Do u personality like it when a gurl plays "hard to get" as she hardly or occasionally calls u, asks u to chill with her, doesn't majority of the time show affection. Does this result in you wanting to get to know her more on a romantically level because she's not "instantly available" for you?


Reading this makes me think of the TV Show "Bridezilla". It completely blows my mind why anyone would want to spend the rest of their lives with a woman like this. Th e fact that this show is thriving shows that men actually DO marry women who play games like this. So... you might get lucky and find a man... or two... who will marry you if you show you are bored with him.

However, the reality of it is... Little girl, when you grow up, you will learn men...or women... no longer enjoy these games. Most people are scared and torn to pieces from someone playing a gamre just like this. Most will no longer tolorate such imature behavior. After so many games.. people just want to be treated human.... and be told if there is a chance or not.


The best trick to getting a woman to amp up her game is to pretend you aren't interested. Shooting a smile and then letting the trail go cold drives women mad and will make them try twice as hard to get your attention. Women are (no offense) vain by nature, and so the idea that this man smiled but suddenly isn't interested is impossible to fathom, it's a rather effective tool in determining a womans level of commitment to getting you're attention.


A guy doing this would piss me off to no extent. Not because I am, what did you say? Vain? No... I am just tired of men's bullsh*t games! I am too old to play the "he smiled at me... but now he's cold... but he smiled at me" game.

If a man did this. Or acted disinterested after smiling/talking to me.... I would think he was completely disinterested. As a matter of fact... I would think he was playing the game of not wanting me, but not wanting someone else to have me either. On top of that, I would have the feeling that he only wants to keep me interested enough to stay hoping he will come around.... when all the while... he only has me there until something better comes along.

No... I would never indulge a man's game that does this. I would find him disinterested and *I* would move on.
 fourletterfame
Joined: 5/13/2008
Msg: 32
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 9:40:42 AM
Oh look, more disdain in regards to someone else's opinion, how colorful.
 secret_agent_thing
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 33
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 10:06:25 AM

Funny, after reading the replies, why is it that men don't like women that play hard to get but they themselves like to play hard to get?


Not sure if that was in reference to a particular post or just your own experience but I personally don't play hard to get. I can't speak for anyone but myself but I assume the majority of decent guys will say that if it seems like they're playing hard to get they're actually just not interested.
 ca-soldier
Joined: 7/3/2008
Msg: 34
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 1:17:51 PM
[Do any of the women who play hard to get even think about other women? Maybe there would be less of those can't take no for an answer men if no women played hard to get....] EXACTLY!!! what is the difference between a woman who is palying hard to get, and a woman who sint interested? Absolutely nothing!! They are acting exactly the same way, giving off the same exact vibes, and exuding the same behaviour. Of course if more women approached men, we wouldnt have this problem near as much
 liquid405
Joined: 6/28/2008
Msg: 37
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 3:25:30 PM

I love people tired of "games" You may be tired, but if you don't play...you're outtie!

Look, the games are another name for courtship and it's been going on forever. Wouldn't we all just like to have what we want and skip movies, dinner sout...flowers...dancing in lame clubs paying too much for drinks you fill in the kabookie dance, but skip the games...i.e. courtship and you often skip the person you want.

This is pure bull****. If you feel like playing games, you are wasting my time. I respect assertiveness far more than manipulation.


If you're playing hard to get, you can forget about it. I just assume you're not interested.

Listen to this man. Men follow patterns, and if the pattern screams "I'm not interested", then we will respond accordingly.
 xeot
Joined: 10/25/2007
Msg: 38
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Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 7/8/2008 4:58:38 PM
It will cause me think she isn't interested. I move on. If it turns out she was 'playing hard to get' now I'm not interested because she decided to play some stupid game.

I guess 50 years ago when men could be persistent it might have been worth it to play the stupid game. Today, persistence is often called stalking when the woman isn't actually interested in the guy. The thing is there is no difference from the guy's POV between 'not interested' and 'playing hard to get'.
 ahron9985
Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 40
Playing Hard To Get
Posted: 8/1/2008 11:41:27 PM
Well no supprise, i'm with every other male poster in this thread.

Games are annoying. Plus how do you know it's a game? i would just think she's not interested, and therfore, I'd forget it.
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