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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Timorek
Joined: 10/29/2007
Msg: 2
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!Page 1 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Well it does seem a bit goofy...

It could be a few things:

1) Just sex
2) Everybody is looking for a friendly face to talk to
or
3) 1 and 2 combined.
 URLOVEY
Joined: 12/23/2007
Msg: 4
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/8/2008 10:49:37 PM
I can share my similar experience and opinion...
I am 37, was married for the last 12 years....and am recently single....
I have had them as young as 18 hit on me.....

When I was single for only about 3 months I had met a young man....he showed his interest and I laughed it off. I even tried to set him up with another younger woman....he insisted he was interested in me.

He was well put together, had his own apartment, nice car and good job....So I went for it...He was 24~! We had a lot of fun....for a few months...but he was young, dumb, and full of (well you know the saying) But we had a great time! And although it was me who chose to end it I still feel for him and wonder....But I am grateful for the experience!

Since then I have asked some of the young suitors that approach me (push up on me as they call it) the question....WHY? Here is the answer they give me...

Older women usually have their own place
Older women are more inclined to give oral sex
Older women have less hang ups about sex
They are more experienced
They dont call a thousand times a day
They have their own money, car.....etc....
They dont act like little girls.....

However, with that, they are looking for sex....quality sex......without the drama that younger girls may bring. And if you did get feelings for the young man, and he didnt reciprocate, most likely, you will feel kinda dumb...

If you go for it, have fun, take it for what its worth, get the kid to cut your lawn while he is there too.....But dont expect love.
 Frisky Monkey
Joined: 6/30/2008
Msg: 5
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/9/2008 12:04:05 AM
When I turn 41, and some hot young 23 year old starts making a move on me, I'd be praising Jesus, Allah and Buddha... and I'd be checking my wallet.
 celts123
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 8
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/9/2008 7:51:05 AM

1. Is looking for a Sex/MILF fantasy to fulfill
2. Is looking for someone who is more likely to be more mature & intelligent.


I would add a few other things to this list.

3. Some men go after any attractive woman regardless of her age.
4. Some men were rejected by many women around their age. So they start contacting other types of women.

As a side note, when I was 24, I had a short term relationship with a 41 yr old woman. She was fairly attractive, mature, successful, and had a good personality. We had some common interests and yes the sex was great. LOL. However we had different long term goals due to the large age difference.
 bcsofnc57
Joined: 11/20/2007
Msg: 10
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/9/2008 10:40:15 AM
Why not? Men your age have been dating 23 year old women since there have been 23 year old women. I am 51, so 10 years older than you are. Would I date a guy that was 33? Sure if we both liked each other, got along.

As to kids, not everyone wants kids. Not to mention were I live a lot of them already have kids by the time they are 23.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 12
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/10/2008 10:38:27 PM
~OP~ I get my fair share of those, so I added lingo in my profile about this very thing. I do usually exclusively date those younger than myself (when I actually did date ~ back when dinosaurs roamed the planet!) My former is 9 years younger. Our ages were never discussed. Today, that might be a stretch for me, but you never know.
 nonsensical
Joined: 8/20/2006
Msg: 13
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/11/2008 4:32:04 AM
Oedipus Complex?
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 14
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/11/2008 8:02:39 AM

If you go for it, have fun, take it for what its worth, get the kid to cut your lawn while he is there too.....But dont expect love.

OMG that's priceless....I love that!

I don't have lawn to cut, but I can find other chores. ha
 JustMary65
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 15
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/11/2008 11:19:25 AM
I agree most guys are looking for thee fetish.. be it MILF or BBW they just don't want a relation ship!!
There are some genuine guys!!


LOL-I so love knowing that being a MILF or BBW makes us a fetish-


Well, I have had both younger and much older men contact me for a variety of reasons-and I dare say sex was on all their minds-age isn't a factor as far as that goes. Now, my ex hubby was a few yrs younger than me, and most of my subsequent lovers have been younger than me-but as far as an ongoing relationship with a much younger man-none have ever lasted beyond a few months. While some younger men are pretty well put together we are in two different places in our lives. Most have been wonderful friends and lovers, but in terms of a life mate-not so much.

Enjoying life and trying new things are important. I see no harm in meeting anyone, because every person who enters your life has some value. That's just my spin on things-for what it is worth.
 j.d.ecensitized
Joined: 12/13/2008
Msg: 17
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 6:23:59 AM
Because if they date a 40 something now when they're 40 something and dating a 23 year old they'll have covered all thier bases?
 celts123
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 19
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 2:18:21 PM
Anytime there is a thread about older women - younger men, many people will automatically assume that the younger man is just looking for sex. Of course there are some younger men that just looking for sex, but there are plenty of men ( and some women as well ) all from ALL ages that are just looking for sex. If an older woman isn't interested in younger men, that's fine. But there is no need to make generalizations about any group of people. BTW sometimes it's the older woman who is looking for casual sex with a younger man. This works both ways.
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 20
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 11:01:46 PM
Heheh...
As one poster said: "When I turn 41, and some hot young 23 year old starts making a move on me, I'd be praising Jesus, Allah and Buddha... "
Amen to that!
 RobertKoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 21
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/19/2008 8:34:36 PM
It's just a fantasy that both want to experience in real life. I've been there myself and dated older women. I did it because I felt attracted to them. Obviously we both wanted the same thing - sex. Depending on the age difference, I just can't see why a woman in her 30's for example would have any interest in seeing a guy 10 or more years younger than herself, if not for that fantasy. I'm also sure that in 9 out of 10 cases the woman breaks it off first, leaving the poor kid sad and confused. In any case, such relationships are doomed to failure even before they start.
 edvis1
Joined: 12/15/2008
Msg: 22
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/19/2008 11:10:09 PM
It's hard to relate to someone that is mainly inot text messaging. Was in highschool at the same time Lindsey Lohan and Britney Spears was or thinks highschool musical was the coolest movie ever made.
 RobertKoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 23
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/20/2008 7:56:55 AM
"HEY AGE IS JUST A NUMBER..."

Well, it's actually more than just a number. Someone who's 10 years older has lived 10 years longer. The younger has yet to go through what the older person went through years ago. Also, and this is especially true for women, that getting involved with a much younger guy means that his goal with the relationship is probably not to have kids and live an adult life within the next 10-12 years. Going out, friends all over the place, wasting money, immature and irresponsible thinking is still part of the process of growing up. I see no reason for a 20 year old to think like a 30+ year old or vice versa.
 attackkatt64
Joined: 10/13/2008
Msg: 28
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/21/2008 7:48:40 PM
Credit girl....these kids are losers.
 RobertKoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 30
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/22/2008 4:43:14 PM
And I find the same garbage and qualities in women 24-45. So no difference. If a younger guy gets involved with an older woman it'll be on her terms in 8 out 10 cases. She'll be the one to break it off first as well when she realizes that the fun is over and that she's too old.
 camaro66269
Joined: 9/20/2007
Msg: 32
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/22/2008 10:55:30 PM
different strokes for different folks, what i mean is that if it works and feels OK then go for it! but if you are worried about what your kids think you should ask them. Also ask yourself how you would feel if they started going with someone who was say about 39
 cfb62
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 34
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 1/2/2009 10:46:11 AM
It's the "new" thing.
In the last 2 years I've been approached by boys as young as 18.
On websites and in bars. It's obviously very flattering...
I think Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher are the ones to thank for this.
Too weird for me, but for some it works.
 gravelman
Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 35
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 1/3/2009 1:14:27 AM
Lol. I wonder why beautiful older women want guys who look old enough to be their dad or grandpa? Why would a young 26 year old want a lady that is old enough to be his mother then? I see so many answers here that it is alright for a 41 year old lady to go with a 23 year old guy, but why is it not alright for an older man to want a younger lady? Please someone tell me.
 bigshrek
Joined: 11/15/2007
Msg: 36
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 1/3/2009 7:02:28 AM
Don't forget, Lex & Terry (radio show) have been extolling the virtues of having a relationship with a COUGAR!!

And truthfully, they ain't wrong. Under 25 guys learn a LOT from an older woman. How to behave, how to keep a relationship going, etc, etc...

My first Cougar had me read "The Story of My Life" by Casanova. You must make love to a woman's MIND as well as her body!! Anything less is a waste of time!!

Be a Southern Gentleman...not a redneck in a wife-beater tee!! If you even OWN a wife-beater, throw it out!! Dress properly at ALL TIMES!! ACT PROPERLY AT ALL TIMES!! Have some couth! Be SMOOTH! Think James Bond (Connery).

And above all, learn Keegle exercises :) Nothing like being able to wiggle yer pecker in a figure-8 !!
 laphoto
Joined: 1/23/2008
Msg: 40
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 1/3/2009 4:21:09 PM
I agree with you. I have a lot of very young men who message me and email me. I do believe that a primary reason is that they are looking for an "uncomplicated" sexual relationship. What they really don't realize is that their age when they are more than 8-10 years younger than us is "complicated" for us.

I've dated someone 8 years younger and that was fun...30 something men have learned how to pleasure a woman and don't have to be taught...and they have a lot of staying power. But...there is always that question about "relationship" and "marriage" and "kids".

Just keep your eyes open, you heart in the right place, and choose the men you date...you deserve to have a great relationship with a man who will treat you the way you want him to.
 SaltfisherSC
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 41
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41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 1/3/2009 8:13:59 PM
Well, I'm 44 and don't even beging my search options younger than 28. Generally speaking, and I am sure that there are exceptions, women younger than 28 do not have it together. I'm a full-time single dad and won't date anyone that doesn't have kids. Youth is great, but it is totally wasted on the young. I have to agree with many of the previous posters. It's about the sex. Just my opinion though. I had friends when I was in my 20's tha always sought out the older, divorcee's in the clubs. They usually tended to be easier to take home for sex. They were divorced and many have self esteem issues due to being divorced, having kids etc. Just scared to be starting over at an older age. A young, attactive guy saying the right things, add in a little alchohol and you have a recipie that worked more often than not. I don't think that much has changed in the last 20 years. Add in the fact that these "older" ladies have spent the last several years in a monogamous relatioship and that equals safer sex (less chance for disease). Granted 20 years ago we didn't worry as much about that as we do today. But the above outlined profile probably still fits. The young guys hitting on you ladies see you as easy prey.

As long as you are armed with that going in, you can make an informd decision. Just my personal opinion.
 bcsofnc57
Joined: 11/20/2007
Msg: 46
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 1/8/2009 9:17:14 PM
Why not? Men have been dating/marrying women a lot younger than them since there have been men and women, so why not date/marry one that is a lot older?

Why do they write and want to date you? Maybe they like something they say in your profile? Why does anyone write anyone? They like something on their profile!!!

At the age of 23 or 24 they should already be grown, not growing up. What exactly would they miss out on because you are older than them?

As to having more children, not every man is desperate to have children. Not every man wants children.

If one writes you, and you like what he has to say and want to date him, go for it.
 wicked smile
Joined: 6/17/2006
Msg: 48
41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 1/14/2009 2:13:58 AM
Super simple...

Because they can. When I was younger I often dated older gal, more experience, less drama, less needy.

In my late 20's, early 30's, I dated everything, older, younger, my age.

Now, mostly younger, why? Because I can, less drama, less needy, less demanding and they come to me for experience.

It goes around and around.
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