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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > did i do the right thing?      Home login  
Joined: 1/14/2006
Msg: 2
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did i do the right thing?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Your relationship now has a foundation of drinking and easy sex..........where you go from here is anyone's guess......

Congratulations on ignoring decades of good advice that's out there in favour of a few hours of cheap fun......

And now you ask if it was right?...........hahahaha

Us guys rely on easy women sometimes though........glad there's still a few left......
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 5
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did i do the right thing?
Posted: 7/27/2008 12:54:40 PM
tough crowd in here.....

bottom line... we never really know what would happen if we didn't do something we did....

I have had sex quick.... and ended up sorry....
I have had sex quick.... and ended up with that person for 6 years....

I have waited.... and then not been with the person after having waited...
I have waited.... and ended up with the person for a couple years....

there is no way to know which is better as each person is different.... I sometime feel like you can't win.... so you just have to make the best decision you can for yourself at the time... and know that if it is the wrong one... you have no regrets because it is what you wanted at the time...

good luck.... it has to be a decent sign if he contacted you today.... remember no regrets.... you were fine in the moment... be fine with knowing you made the right decision for you at the time....
Joined: 2/29/2008
Msg: 6
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did i do the right thing?
Posted: 7/27/2008 12:56:23 PM
One thing you might consider is being completely straight with him. Tell him that you are quite taken with him, and would like to see if something might click. If he is in agreement with this; let him know that you do not blame him, that you are as much at fault as he is; but, because of the alcohol, you feel you had sex too early. Then ask if he would be willing to go out with you a few times without having sex, in order to establish a more balanced relationship; and to assure you both that the relationship isn't based solely on sex; and then see where things lead. If he is genuinely interested in you; he will do this without batting an eye. If he is only interested in sex; this is a good way to find out. If things don't work out, don't blame it on the sex; they probably wouldn't have worked out anyway. If things are meant to work out, this may help re-center the relationship on more stable footing.

As for the jerks who diss you for sleeping with him too soon; read their posts, these are angry, unhappy people whose advice probably wouldn't have been constructive anyway. Good luck; and please post back here some time if things work out well for you.
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 7
did i do the right thing?
Posted: 7/27/2008 12:57:53 PM
To be honest,,whats right and whats wrong,,it depends on you and him,,,,,i went on date with a guy and we seemed to hit it off, we had dinner and talked,,,but i noticed he was checking out all the women around us,,,but whatever,,,hey he was just looking ,,so anyway he starts telling me about his last girlfriend,,,how when they met they got along and talked and enjoyed being around each other,,,so much so that after knowing each other for 20 minutes, they had sex and we're together for 2 or 4 yrs( i forget),,i was like ok,,,,so we get to his car,,,we start to kiss, he starts to put his hand down my shirt,,,i stop him,,im not into sex on a first date,,,,he stops,, starts the car and drops me off at my car and sayes " i'll call you",,,,right,,,,,so a couple of days go by and i see him online,,,i ask what happened??????? He sayes "that because i didnt have sex with him ,,i wasnt the one for him,,,hes toooo old to play games",,so i say,,it a depends on you and the guy,,,,
Joined: 1/30/2008
Msg: 9
did i do the right thing?
Posted: 7/27/2008 1:18:00 PM
Myself, I would have never got drunk on a first date or any date. Would have never slept with him upon just meeting him. Did you do the right thing?Are you looking for us to justify what you did as ok? If so, I would say no. JUmping into bed with a guy with out knowing the guy is like playing russian roulette.
Joined: 6/20/2006
Msg: 16
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did i do the right thing?
Posted: 7/27/2008 6:59:01 PM
I think that it depends on age and maturity! Can't answer in a blanket statement but all situations are different.
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 21
did i do the right thing?
Posted: 7/27/2008 9:57:53 PM
well sweetheart didn't he sleep with you as well, equality is a good thing, as long as you enjoyed it then what's the harm?
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 24
did i do the right thing?
Posted: 7/27/2008 11:13:32 PM
Op, you did the right thing in that moment. As far as not sleeping with him anymore to find out the basis of the relationship, I dont think I agree with that either. You had already talked to him online. You were already in to him, I think holding out he might have viewed you either as a game player or a tease. If he is lame enough to think that the way you respond to him is the way you would respond to anyone then he doesnt deserve you anyway. You can casually mention to him that you are glad you already knew him or you wouldnt have allowed things to go so far so quickly but you think it is great that you were both mature enough to accept the chemisty you have and to build on it.
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 25
did i do the right thing?
Posted: 7/27/2008 11:24:42 PM
What cracks me up is that people nowadays have sex and then they figure out the particulars in having a possible relationship. And what does his looks have to do with anything? I dont' get that people justify being sleazy or sleeping with someone quickly because someone is good looking.
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