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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?      Home login  
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 antonioIII
Joined: 4/22/2008
Msg: 3
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
It's happened once or twice, but i didn't care.........i got the stripes.
 Henry L. Moon
Joined: 6/1/2008
Msg: 6
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/29/2008 6:05:51 AM
That doesn't happen to me....I can spot a bimbo a mile off. Who wants to screw the town pump?
 BaldyisBeautiful
Joined: 3/28/2008
Msg: 9
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/29/2008 7:32:20 AM
I would only feel that way if it was you maggie! Any other woman and I'd be ... it's all good!
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 10
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Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/29/2008 8:14:53 AM
OP, if it were a man who had done this, he'd be called a "player".....so what would we call her? A "playerette"....."playerina"....."playgirl"?




~ds~
 pokerjimmy
Joined: 11/10/2006
Msg: 11
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Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/29/2008 8:31:43 AM
No one likes to be "dumped", but one has to accept the fact it was a one-sided relationship from the start.

Overall, I don't think women USE men for sex. I've heard women who still bang their ex because the sex was the only thing that was great, but that's a pretty mutual thing.

Women have the advantage of being able to be the ugliest troll in the world and still find a man to do them, but it doesn't work that way for men...ergo prostitutes.
 WpgGentleman2
Joined: 6/19/2008
Msg: 14
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/29/2008 11:25:25 PM
Was I paid? Or did my pimp have to go after her?
 afashionlady
Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 18
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/30/2008 12:33:40 AM

Wow, have men become more sensitive or has the stereotype been wrong for so long?


Maggie...I was thinking it was just me! Maybe the not so sensitive bunch is being used for sex and can't answer...hehe
 Gangster Kitten
Joined: 4/3/2008
Msg: 20
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/30/2008 5:53:29 AM

Wow, have men become more sensitive or has the stereotype been wrong for so long? Women are always saying men are just out for sex, but you guys sound pretty upset over the idea of a woman using you for sex. Truly fascinating.


No matter what gender you are, nobody likes being lied to or deceived. I don't understand why women are so distasteful when a man tactfully approaches a woman with the proposition of NSA sex.

Im an oddball, in the sense that I feel that people who are just looking for casual sex, and aren't deceitful about it, aren't tramps-players, bla bla bla. I actually respect them for knowing what they want, and being open about it.

So, to finally answer the OP. Yes, I'd be angry and hurt, I don't like having my emotions toyed with. However, If a woman was open to me with interest in a one-night stand, I'd go for that.
 _Icon_
Joined: 5/18/2008
Msg: 22
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/30/2008 6:34:03 AM
If the sex was boring and unfulfilling perhaps she just didnt want to try again.
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 23
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Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/30/2008 6:50:34 AM
"OP: Wow, have men become more sensitive or has the stereotype been wrong for so long?"

Well, I guess I am inclined to think it is both....in what percentages does one outweigh the other, not sure.

In terms of the stereotype, I believe a lot of that comes from the 'squeaky wheel' syndrome. If you think about it, that's pretty much what a stereotype is....take behavior demonstrated by a few of a certain demographic and make assumptions about the entire demographic. So women who have described or complained about men in the past who have, in their collective opinions, done them wrong and bailed, 'get the oil'. Same as the men who behave this way, beat their chests afterward and proclaim their machoness and conquests. Those of both sexes who are happy and satisfied don't typically go around stating how wonderful the opposite sex is, how wonderfully blissful and content they are in their sexual relationship, nor give kudos publicly. They simply are content within themselves and their relationship(s). You can usually pick these people out of a crowd by the goofy grin and expressions on their faces.

In other words, people don't usually speak up when something goes right....only the other way around.

As far as the sensitivity aspect, yes, I believe it's true to a large extent, that men have become/are becoming that way....evolving. As women have become 'independent' and no longer 'need' men, they have a greater inclination to seek what they 'want' instead. Sensitivity is one of the traits that seems to have surfaced in the past few years, along with many other typically 'feminine' qualities. I think many men 'naturally' struggle with this transition. They still are and wish to remain male. But if they want to find and be with a woman, they need to adapt or change. Be what it is she seeks. Those who have adapted to become what is sought as well as maintain a good portion of their 'masculinity' are able to feel more balanced and comfortable. Those who struggle to adapt or over-adapt, have a harder time dealing with themselves in this new reality of what most women seek.

I believe (and I'm sure there are studies out there somewhere), the way the family dynamic has changed the past couple of decades....especially with the exploded divorce rate, that more and more boys are being raised by women. Perhaps not exclusively, but certainly where the female influence is predominant. These boys are 'learning' sensitivity and the other feminine traits and it is ingrained in them. It's what they're taught and learn....what they 'know'. That is why men seem to be more sensitive....they are.

JMO




~ds~
 smhrgs3000
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 24
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/30/2008 11:04:08 AM
Only once intentionally, 30 years ago as a strapping, extremely fit & virile carpenter, working outside, toolbelt & no shirt, that she obviously enjoyed watching thru her office window,..... until lunch. Seemed I was the entree that afternoon, ooops.
However, I'm fairly sure I've been inadvertently used on several other occassions.
Ladies who have been in long term relationships which involved really good, regular sex, and who then become divorced or seperated, do miss it, sometimes a lot!
And just like men, sometime their passions(i.e. hormones) speak louder than their brain. At least until that passions been thoroughly doused, and the wiser child once again regains control,... only to rethink all of her earlier statements and promises,...just like the men you label "horndogs", "scoundrels", or "lushes", only plumbed differently, LMAO.
 lateef7842
Joined: 4/14/2008
Msg: 25
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Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/30/2008 11:50:20 AM
I would not feel used at all. Not one single bit. You get yours, I get mine. No muss, no fuss. Lock the door on your way out.

However, if I paid for drinks, an expensive meal, and a show, but got no sex then, hells yeah, I'd feel used.

Lateef
 spiderette
Joined: 6/28/2008
Msg: 29
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/30/2008 10:04:55 PM
OP: I doubt the man would feel used due to sex per se, BUT he would definitely feel used if he really liked the woman (and she acted like she was really into him) and she blew him off with no apparent reason (whether or not sex was involved). When a man likes a woman, it hurts just as much as when a woman likes a man and gets blown off.
 Ronery1234
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 30
Do you ever feel 'used' for sex?
Posted: 7/30/2008 10:19:47 PM

No, I wouldn't feel used. If that was her intent, I'd chalk it up to her mental instability, poor upbringing, and would be damn grateful she was gone.


That happened to me once. I was having a good relationship but I was actually her short term affair and not a one night stand if thats what you were asking about. She was mentally unstable with a poor upbringing, and I'm glad shes gone just like what kamaboko said. I was used, and was looking forward to our relationship growing strong, but I dont have a "at least I got some" view about it. Sure it was nice, but I prefer a relationship.
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