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Show ALL Forums  > Testimonials  > Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!      Home login  
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 BlueEyedOceanna
Joined: 7/2/2008
Msg: 1
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Thanks PlentyofFish for offering a site that is less crap, and more realistic. While I had a number of crazy-wierd messages, I met a wonderful butch of my dreams and intend on continuing down our path together.

For all of you in the same dynamic looking for the Butch or Femme of your dreams, this is the best forum for actual responses, as well as success.
 Karrpilot
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 2
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 3:08:56 AM
I have met some butch women in the past. They scared me.
 nebula22
Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 3
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 6:15:09 AM
I often wonder why a woman would want a butch or want to be a butch.
Something must have happened to them when they were young to make them like that.
I think maybe they was raped or molested.
Maybe by a man and didn't like it or by a woman and did like it.
But maybe they were just influenced by what they saw on TV.
Has anyone else noticed all the crap on TV and the message it sends to the young?
 freespirit0452
Joined: 12/20/2007
Msg: 4
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 6:44:57 AM
I never could understand that if a girl doesn't like guys then why is she attracted to a girl who dresses and acts like a guy. Hey, there's nothing like the real thing baby.
 Internetdatingpariah
Joined: 10/17/2004
Msg: 5
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 8:25:04 AM
Yes nebula...I'm sure TV is responsible.

Love is love and everyone deserves happiness.
 Beholder123
Joined: 6/25/2008
Msg: 6
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 10:44:43 AM
Congrats! Best of Luck in your future!
 boisegoodbadboy
Joined: 8/21/2005
Msg: 7
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 11:42:42 AM

There's nothing like the real thing, baby!


and dont forget....'things go better with coke'


Vulf...youre an infidel
 plainguy
Joined: 10/10/2006
Msg: 8
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 12:09:34 PM
I don't believe a person's 'preferance' as to their sexuality is anyones business! As far as TV goes and your theory, have wondered, What KIND OF SATELLITE the ancient Romans had that promoted 'gay love'? ITS BEEN around A LONGGGG time. Its just not being hidden as much, and people are more willing to step up and state, THEY are no differant than anyone else. I am not 'GAY', but I will NOT condemn anyone that is, NOR will I try to lay blame on society, tv, radio, or anything else. Lifes to short to for that.
 Dancing_4_You
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 9
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 12:14:56 PM
OP i am happy for you and apologize upon behalf of the "heterosexual" population for the homophobic responses in reaction to your happiness. i hope you continue to log in and read this response, as you have understandably deleted your profile.

it is sad that the "science" of sexual identity and sexual preference (two different things people) has not yet reached the masses. i am glad you found "love". i have no doubt that abuse makes people do many things, but the logic can go both ways. e.g. born gay, maybe you'd start sleeping with heterosexuals? i also fear that the porn is getting to people's big heads, with heterosexuals trying to look "cool" or please their men's fantasies. that has nothing to do with a gay or lesbian woman looking for a sincere and loving partner.

a lesbian friend told us this way back in college, in the days when she had to hide her sexual preference and the rest of us would wince when people told "gay jokes" in her presence, not knowing. i will never forget her words: "most people can be sexual with anyone. the question is who do you LOVE and wish to MARRY?" not sure how nj and ny is right now on this subject, but when i moved to CA, i thought how much happier she would have been here. there, she could not walk down the streets and hold hands with her SO. it just didn't seem fair. that would be hard for me not to do with the one i loved.

so, if for those who are constantly carrying around their homophobia, i suggest you look inward for answers as to "why". a woman wished to share her hope and expressed her sincere gratitude to pof. there is no reason to poke fun at that.
 lovebeingmom
Joined: 10/29/2007
Msg: 10
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 1:06:51 PM
To the OP: Good Luck! and I sincerely mean that.

I dont understand the attraction, but I would assume a lesbian doesnt understand my attraction to men :)

What I am curious is why people who are gay, want a partner that is like the opposite sex? I realize some people made sarcastic comments above, but I really am curios. If I had a close gay friend I would ask.... it is not meant as an insult just a question,albeit apersonal one.

Anyhow hope it all works out for them
 Thatguy67
Joined: 9/20/2006
Msg: 11
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 2:34:39 PM
I just wanna say say congrats & good luck!
 Ready4SomethingFun
Joined: 3/17/2008
Msg: 12
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 3:40:01 PM
You know vulf, you have just went back a few years to the hair metal days....all those guys dressing like women, wearing make up and high heels. And they had more women flocking to them than they could handle. So it works both ways, some girls like the manly girls, and some like the girly men.
 OldFolkie
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 13
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 3:47:34 PM
Congratulations!
It's not like there is too MUCH love in the world. Whereever you find it, it is good. And as was posted a bit earlier, the growing acceptance of homosexuals in our society has nothing to with television, which the Greeks and Romans did not have. TV after all is only a mirror of the culture it presents. It is just that our society is maturing, with more and more of us rejecting bigotry in any form.
 lovebeingmom
Joined: 10/29/2007
Msg: 14
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 8:38:10 PM
Thanks for the answers, ( and not flaming me - no pun intended- i mean flame wars) I read more than post in the forums as some responses get nasty,. People dont have to agree, but sometimes people get alot nastier online than they probably would in person. So sometimes I am hesitant to post.

Like someone said, love is hard to find.period.
 Dancing_4_You
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 15
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Posted: 8/14/2008 8:58:01 PM
maybe someone will start a new thread on this, as i see that education is still sorely needed. the short of it is that there are two separate brain centers. one is based upon what you like to look/feel like. the other upon attraction. so, if a man wants to "look" like a woman, he still may be heterosexual. also, genetics no longer define man or woman. you can be a genetic male or vice versa and have organs of the opposite assigned sex due to developmental detours. that becomes more complicated and is partly messed up by letting doctors decide too early on, what each individual's preference may become.

clearly there are not two simple sexes as originally defined by genetic marking of xx and xy. in addtion there are also xxy's and xyy's and i am sure many other variations.

remember, G_d does not make junk! many individuals sure have a bad habit of poking fun at creation and diversity. that, in turn, isolates people and they are afraid to educate others about their differences. it becomes a vicious circle. we all must do our best to understand and break out of this circle. so, for me, i do my best to pass things on. those of you even more informed, would be doing a service to say even more. i find that when people are informed, there are way many more good people than bad. unfortunately ignorance breeds hate and pain for many who are "different" or supposedly so. because if people felt safe to come out of their hiding, maybe they would not be that different after all.
 iSeal
Joined: 10/17/2007
Msg: 16
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 10:33:49 PM

Interesting questions you raise.... why women like this want women who look and act male but not the real thing... And again, you are right~~Ain't nothing like the REAL thing, baby~~

But even more interesting is Nebula's question of what's on tv. The media has been working overtime to redesign our social norms to accept any type behavior as "normal."

When my children were young, and impressionable, I wanted their impressions to be those of my convictions and NOT those of the liberal and social engineering medias, so I did away with tv as the world knows it.

I'm glad that the above view is now in the minority.

I'm a straight man who likes manly women. I'm not ashamed of it. It's what I like. I really don't care if anyone's opposed to it. As long as they don't interject themselves into my life, they can complain amongst themselves all they want. Meanwhile, I'm going to lead a happy life over here.
 ShouldaBeenACowboy
Joined: 7/24/2008
Msg: 17
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 10:58:08 PM
Try the unions; they have a few also.
 BluenoteKeys
Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 18
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 11:05:42 PM
I dont understand the attraction, but I would assume a lesbian doesnt understand my attraction to men :)

What I am curious is why people who are gay, want a partner that is like the opposite sex? I realize some people made sarcastic comments above, but I really am curios. If I had a close gay friend I would ask.... it is not meant as an insult just a question,albeit apersonal one.


Agree with you on that one!!
I'm curious too..............if you want a "guy"..........go with a real one!!!
The thing that gets me is just how damned judgmental the butch-femme community is of 'lesbians' who don't have cropped hair or wear hobnail boots...........heck, check out the gay scene in Nova Scotia!! Talk about redneck prairie folks - go west, Maritimers!!!

There's much more prejudice in the BF community than there EVER was in the pre and post Stonewall era's. A 'femme' is gay??.........not here!!.......they even have a form for you to fill out, or you have to turn in your 'femme' card !!!

Prejudiced against gays?........You bet I am - when they turn against their own family - oh yeah - and don't even get started on the FTM or MTF communities!!
 musicianfriend
Joined: 7/23/2007
Msg: 19
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/14/2008 11:45:33 PM
Its so funny to me...if one doesnt agree with the gay life style...they are uninformed...uneducated..judgemental...ignorant...etc etc..

Maybe we just dont agree with it...That is our right...I would never abuse a gay person...but I sure do not agree with what they do..WHY? ....I have read many of their own gay publications...such as the Midnight Rider I believe it was called..WOW...a bunch of violent perversion that they protrayed as sex..Sorry...it had NOTHING to do with lovemaking..only humiliating one another..It talked about "fisting"..Do you know what that is...Its is sick..Sorry..but it is and it will definately permanently ruin the receivers spinchter muscle after time to where it wont work any more..that poor masochist will need a diaper one day. gross!

And furthermore...in that same gay paper..it also talked about how they were going to snatch our children into their gay community...and they gloated about how that was going to upset the heterosexuals....sounds like an attack to me...a premeditated attack..but according to liberals..only hetros are mean and hateful..YEA RIGHT!!!

Maybe some of you should "educate" yourselves as to what really goes on in that community..

When they fight..being they are female to female or male to male...their fights...physical contact fights are usually much more violent than a fight between a man or a woman which usually would never come to blows...but being the same sex..they are much more inclined to hit each other...those are just the stats I read.

Due to tv and all the propaganda...there are more gays here than in the past..I dont think that that was a positive path to follow..YES...our children have been force fed gayism..Not fair to us parents who do not believe...I believe that it is the business of the parents to teach their own children...not the government with all its propaganda..teaching things to kids that will ruin their lives...and the family structure..which by the way is what makes our country strong...hetro families.

Mom and a Dad..you see all you highly "educated"people out there....children need the Mom for some emotional input and the Dads for other emotional input..Male and female..both important to the well rounded natural growth of a child. Its the natural biological way of life..I dont buy all this "new family" stuff..Its a social experiment with children being used as lab rats. We have no idea yet what is going to happen...

My stepsister is gay...She dumped us when she became gay..None of us ever hurt her or criticized her...Maybe shes ashamed at how SHE TREATED US!!..dont know.

But "moral" to the story is this...Just because we dont agree with the life style...does not make us ignorant...judgemental or uneducated..Its our opinion thank you very much...and we have the right to have an opinion different than you liberals...Just like a liberal...if one doesnt agreewith a liberal..the liberal will start calling names and accuse the opposition of being..bigoted...prejucice...homophobic etc..you get the picture...trying to make out as if your smarter than the opposition..La La land.

Funny to me the way liberals are ....See..I think YOU are ignorant and uneducated because you cant even see the pain that some of the gays have in their lives...all the ones I have known are very sad people...I used to work with alot of gay men...I didnt hate them..we were sort of friends...but they didnt even like what they were doing..go figure..so does that make them homophobic ..ignorant and uneducated?

People like us also have the right to their opinion...Wouldnt treat a gay any different...but dont have to agree with them either..Its my right.
 Internetdatingpariah
Joined: 10/17/2004
Msg: 20
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/15/2008 8:42:35 AM
This is getting way off topic. This thread was started by a woman who found a partner here. That's all. It is not a gay-straight lifestyle thread.
 Beholder123
Joined: 6/25/2008
Msg: 21
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:05:22 AM
"Prejudiced against gays?........You bet I am - when they turn against their own family - oh yeah - and don't even get started on the FTM or MTF communities!!"


LMAO! um.....okay? Please tell me...is it true what they say? 'Ignorance is bliss'?.......
 musicianfriend
Joined: 7/23/2007
Msg: 22
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/15/2008 3:32:39 PM
Well well well....sameole typical response from the educated one...psycobabble speal that no one can figure out what the heck he is trying to say...misquoted my entire post..cant figure out where you came up with most of what you say?

I copied his letter below my comments..you may scroll back and forth to see what is being commented about.

NAME CALLING...the first name you mentioned was BIGOT.. Yep..that ones really popular these days...theres that name calling thing again.

CONFUSED COMPLAINT.... the only complaint I had in the entire post was the name calling and the shoving down the throat of children someone elses 'preferences' or lifestyle...one I do not participate in..My kids...my rules..

REVULSION: The only thing I was experiencing revulsion about was the fisting..does that appeal to you? Is that an acceptable behavior..It came out of their newpaper..I just quotted the activity.

THE WAY I FEEL INSTEAD OF THE WAY I THINK: You will need to elaborate cause I just cant figure out what you are talking about....isnt the way one feels pretty much the way one thinks? Or maybe I missed something here enlightened one.

PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE?..."you made me feel that way?" What on earth are you talking about..I never said anything of the sort. Read my post #29..none of what this man has accused me of is in my post...

CONTORTED OBSERVATIONS: Here we go again..more insults. if you dont agree with a liberal...they call you names or try to destroy your integrity and try to make you out to be a fool. Remember...Hitler said, "If you tell the people the same thing over and over and over...they will soon believe the lie."

BITTER AND FRUSTRATED:..I really have to laugh at this one...no where have I been bitter..just stating the facts...read my msg #29 and see for yourself..Where on earth does this man come up with this crap. Sir...you are the bitter one with contorted observations..and your name calling and trying to defamate my character. You dont even make any sense in your post.

ALL GAY PEOPLE ARE SAD? Are you kidding..I never said that..You did... I just said the ones Ive known were not happy people. Some one emailed me about this post and said they had the same experience...the homosexuals she knew were sad and lost like the ones I have known...We are all people...no matter what we are doing..I care about people...I do believe from my own lifes experience...thefolks I knew were not that happy..they told me so...we discussed it many many times in our conversations...I am sure some are happy..but some arent...so how do we help them? Tell them to continue doing what isnt working for them...or try to show them something different. You sir...would you just let them wallow in their pain? You might be a bit heartless sir.

FRUSTRATION AND BITTERNESS? Are you kidding? How in the world do you get that from my post. Are you a delusional person...drinking? doing drugs...surely not in your right mind...You are the one using the offensive language..I belive IT IS YOU SIR THAT IS FRUSTRATED AND BITTER.. Its everywhere in your words and in all your condesending posts..Touche'

NOBODY LISTENS TO MY 'SCREECH'? HA HA HA... That must be why people have written me many many times and agreed with my posts in my email..Time after time after time..They like my honesty about the issues.

MY EVALUATION: This man in many of his post is full of anger and comes at you with a sense of superiority..He talks down to anyone that doesnt agree with him...He is always insulting and annoying..but like a mosquito..I just brush him away..

Have a great day dude! You do not bother me...in fact you humor me ALOT...I love to read your posts..they are quite amusing..Hey ...Hey...can you hear me wwwaaayyy up there in your ivory towers. I really think this man thinks he is better than others...that his ways are kinda like God truth and the rest of us should 'listen'..yea right.

TOUCHE' AND OLE' NOW YOU GO AND HAVE A GREAT DAY...AND DARLING...PLEASE TRY TO SMILE A REAL SMILE AND TRULY ENJOY YOUR LIFE...LOL TRY TO BE NICE SOMETIME...IT WILL MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD...HELPS TO GET RID OF PENT UP ANGER AND BITTERNESS...LOL

THE FOLLOWING LETTER WAS WRITTEN ABOUT ME IN REGARDS TO MY MSG #29:

What it is, IDP, is another ragweed-like sprouting of bigots, and the always necessary uprooting and spaying - I mean spraying.

Like musi-fiend up there, who doesn't know the difference between "preference" and "opinion," not to mention her confused complaint. She is certainly entitled to her preference, even to her revulsion. She simply does not realize they are entirely about her - they are her qualities, which don't describe anyone else in any way. She complains about the way she feels (not "thinks"), and tries to hold someone else responsible. That's textbook passive-aggression, to say you made me feel this way. Another person is never responsible for one's feelings; we are each responsible for our own, as for our actions. Mother tried to teach that to you.

She's pretty comical in her contorted observations, isn't she? She knows some sad gay people, so all gay people are sad. Well, she's a bitter and frustrated straight person, so I guess all straight people are bitter and frustrated. But wait!. Since all gay people are sad, it must be that all straight people are happy! Sure we are! Since some gay people fist, all straight people don't fist! If one chickenhawk-friendly article appeared in one gay publication, then all gay people are circling grade schools like wild Indians! Never mind that the overwhelming majority of predation on children is by straight men. Frustration and bitterness trump the facts and common sense every time.

I shouldn't tease quite so much, because I'm actually reassured by musi-fiend's bitterness. It makes plain to me that nobody listens to her screech. And, let's face it, in any social progress, somebody has to bring up the rear. Aren't you glad it isn't you?

Cheeers!

Vulf
 lovebeingmom
Joined: 10/29/2007
Msg: 23
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/18/2008 8:53:40 PM
Yes it has gotten off topic, but since the OP closed account who cares ( yeah I know its against rules...
Regardless of whether or not I agree with the lifestyle perversion as someone mentioned, abounds in every lifestyle.

AS to the family situation.In some ways that bothers me ( what one poster said about them using children as lab rats) well I dont have a husband, does that make me the same because I chose to adopt 4 kids 3 of them as a single person? Yes having a dad would be awesome, but a good father would enrich their lives not rescue them. It is better to have a family that cares than NO family ( even if said family is different than norm )

Granted non traditional families have issues that can come up but ...would be nice if we could have different opinions without being nasty about it
 musicianfriend
Joined: 7/23/2007
Msg: 24
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Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/21/2008 7:15:02 PM
Lab rats.....I didnt intend to be nasty...But I have read the homosexual writtings that they write in their magazines and news papers......before you judge me..you read some of it...then write me..

I am trying to make a point...these children are being used...they are being exposed to a lifestyle that in history has always caused civilizations to fall...Read your history..If we do not know History...we are doomed to repeat it.. We have NO IDEA what will happen to them...how it will affect them..there happens to be many pediofiles and perversion in that lifestyle...I do worry very much about those children..They will never experience a 'Normal' home.. Yea yea yea..I know there are straight pediofiles too..but we are not talking about them in this post...

I too was a single mother...We had no choice either..I didnt plan it that way..I did a very good job...But I will tell you ...It was not the way things should have been..we just had to make due..just like you...I commend you to give those children a home..and it looks like you are looking for a man to gift them with..a father figure..a man to show the little boys how a man should be..strong..provider..and he will teach the little girls how a man should treat them..And you..the Mom...will teach the little boys how to treat the women of their lives and will show your little girls how to me Moms and wives..That is what is missing in this society..


I think the experience of these children and your childrens experience will be very very different...they will learn things children should not have to know..


Its a pie in the sky to accept every lifestyle...the fact is..they are not all good and healthy..thats just reality my dear. In the 50's...all the medical books considered homosexuality a mental disorder...then they changed the books...

As we get more and more liberal....our society is crumbling...You just cant embrace every single thing..there have to be responsible living...There has to be boundaries...How do you set those boundaries..when the activity as a whole is not healthy or wholesome...History will guide you on what is good or not good..Read history. (Not the history books the liberal anti American people changed to suit their own agenda.)

.I have know several gays...we have been friends...they are not happy with theirselves..They were miserable...or they were living lifestyles that gave them aids and several of these men have died..I thought all this acceptance was supposed to make them happy...YOU DONT GET IT..They need some help to sort their selves out..they are mixed up...yes plenty function well...but it just isnt a natural life. They are not happy ....they told me so..they were always in anguish it seems.

And the men...well..I hate to think about when they are old...All I can say...I'll give you a stock market tip...Buy some Depends stock.
 meeshcake
Joined: 9/26/2007
Msg: 25
Butch-Femme Love--don't lose hope!
Posted: 8/21/2008 7:30:01 PM
Vulf -you crack me up- I think I love you.

I know the OP is gone, but I wish her much happiness!
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