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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.      Home login  
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 nexthyme
Joined: 9/12/2007
Msg: 6
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Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.Page 1 of 1    
Lostcauz has it right... Same thing happened to me too, about giving up, feeling not gonna meet him, and oh hello you look like someone that would make a good friend..

Sometimes it seems easier to stick with the familure... Only problem with that theory is that while you stick to familure, all those exciting things like bad dates, someone that came across as a total doll at the start of the date, but then turns in to the green 12 armed monster with realy bad breath, being stood up, played, danced around between others would all be missed... LOL

Sometimes that actually seems like some sort of right of passage in the dating world, and it would really stink to miss it...

I will tell you this, as lost stated, turn off the IM, and let the guy send you an intelligent, mind provoking e mail. Deal with the ones that you know you aren't compatible with, and then one day you too will meet that angel that you have been looking for. It won't feel strange, and everything will seem to fit in place between the two of you.

Will it last a life time for me and him... Ohhhh I so hope so, but with just what we have had, it has all been worth the bad dates, the good dates, the so so dates, and the dates that stood you up...

Oh it also gets easier as you get more comfortable in your own skin, and aren't worried about having to IMPRESS anyone. If they aren't wowed just by who you are today, and what you have going on, then they are not going to be worth working hard to wow. You have to be true to you, and not try and please everyone that takes a look your direction.

I don't know how much help this is, but I will say that at the very least sit back and have fun...
 willowbunny
Joined: 7/20/2006
Msg: 7
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Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.
Posted: 8/19/2008 3:27:48 PM
I was out of the dating game for 6 years because I was in a relationship. When I came back to it, just like you, I couldn't believe how things had changed. I have found it is best to stick with what you believe. There is no need to accept someone else's idea of how a date should go. I still believe it is the woman who dictates how far things go and when anything physical happens. Stick to your guns girl and do what you feel is right. Anyone who pressures you is not worth the time of day. I'd agree with you on staying in a public place until you feel happy about being alone with a guy. Good luck and happy fishing.
 Karrpilot
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 8
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Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.
Posted: 8/19/2008 3:48:42 PM
I have also been out of the game for quite some time. For various personal reasons. And i agree, things have changed a lot. And in my opinion, NOT for the better. I am almost to the point of chucking it all. Games are suppossed to be fun, and possibly won?
 kwh56
Joined: 8/7/2007
Msg: 9
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Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.
Posted: 8/19/2008 4:31:16 PM
Interesting to say the least. In my case I never really dated much. I was on a few 1 night dates when I meet a girl my 1st year of high school. We were together all of high school and after that we just grew apart. I was out on 3-4 more dates and met a girl I was with for a year and a half. Funny now but the night we broke up it was our first ever really serious argument In the heat of the moment I told her as I was leaving fine I can replace you before the night is over. 2 Hours later that night I met the one who 4 years later became my wife of 23 years! Ive gotten to the point I dont really care if I date or not. I tend to go for younger women but not for the reasons most will think! Most women my age it seems are really just looking for a replacement husband and Im not going to be one. Im a single father with kids at home full time and have no desire to get married again what so ever. further it seems every woman I meet I think is very nice has more problems than I want to have around LOL Then I have the kids to consider also. Their Mom has turned into a party girl and has different men at home all the time. I know what the kids think of that and I would never even think of subjecting them to that. So Im looking but not very hard. If I stumble into to one fine if not thats fine also.
 thewalrusx
Joined: 7/1/2008
Msg: 13
Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.
Posted: 8/19/2008 8:46:32 PM
Wait what "game" are we talking about, Parcheesi?

Dating isn't a game to me. Although it is fun and requires two (or more, lol) participants:
a) You don't win anything . You find someone base on self esteem, compatibility, and a bit of luck.
b) You are not trying to beat anyone.
c) There are no clear or set rules.
Ect, ect...

If you want to date just try to meet people and be yourself: no "playing" necessary.

**This post is Trademarked by Milt and Bradley Co. Not recommended for children under the age of 18. Some assembly required**
 Stonefoo
Joined: 6/14/2007
Msg: 15
Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.
Posted: 8/20/2008 2:59:41 AM
"Dating isn't a game to me.
a) You don't win anything .
b) You are not trying to beat anyone.
c) There are no clear or set rules."

Sighhh, Much to learn you have...young Jedi.
 Chippy2
Joined: 6/21/2006
Msg: 16
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Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.
Posted: 8/20/2008 4:09:33 AM
Advice hmm!!!!!
Be yourself

Ignore the rules, being spontaneous can be a turn on / attractor

Follow up a love interest until it stops feeling good, then give it some time to see if the feeling returns.

Have fun

Dont let the fact that some you fancy does not fancy you get you down, there will come a time when the roles are reversed

Go to the mirror regularly and see if the man / woman in the glass is happy with what you have been doing. You can not lie to yourself.
If your happy , single is not so bad and you can find yourself on the path to a relationship without realizing it.

Throw away rose tinted glasses, make sure you can see the person your on a date with clearly
 thewalrusx
Joined: 7/1/2008
Msg: 20
Getting back into the game when you have been out for so long.
Posted: 8/27/2008 6:40:02 PM
"sighhh, Much to learn you have...young Jedi"

You must unlearn what you have learned.
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