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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???      Home login  
 AUTHOR
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???Page 1 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
Why needlessly overcomplicate things? If there is a woman in my life that I have been seeing regularly and exclusively, I introduce her as my girlfriend, so and so.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 9
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/7/2008 10:39:06 AM

My question is for all the over 30's (past high school, past gushing and blushing)... What do you call them?

I'll never get that old. I love the blushing/gushing stage!!


Should their label change with age? Teenyboppers and geriatrics regularly have b/fs, g/fs and we all think it cute - but what do the middle aged call their whatevers? How do you, as a mature adult, explain their place in your life without feeling silly? Does anyone have a good, age appropriate title I can steal?

It's been a while but the last time I was in that position, but I called him my husband (which he was.) Since then, there has only been one who has met anyone in my life and he was called CK by my choosing, so that's how he was introduced. There was no pre-cursor. Just his initials that I used versus his "given" name. He did introduce me as the nick-name he and most everyone else calls me ~ so I guess that was appropriate for us both. I see no reason to label anyone in my life except my best-friend. I call her by initials as well, but to others, I call her "my sister by choice." That's about as labelish as I get. I think "friend" works well when someone isn't quite certain what to call someone ~ nothing at all seems less offending to some, just their name. JMO
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 11
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/7/2008 11:03:42 AM
^^^^LOL ~ my Mother would laugh, but not all Mother's are that "young" or witty I'm afraid. The only real suggestion I have: it's time you stop letting the busy-bodies into your business. There does come a point when your business is no one else's business. It takes a while to get the hang of that ~ but once you do, it's really quite nice to just let them wonder! Besides, if you aren't quite sure what to call him, maybe you shouldn't be introducing him to those who have an invested interest in wondering?? Just my opinion, some people like their extended friends/families involved ~ I have met so few men I'd want to know my friends/family I guess I'm no longer "an open book" !! Good luck OP!!
 looptex1
Joined: 5/6/2008
Msg: 18
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/7/2008 6:22:51 PM
you could say,," This is my next victom so and so..
na, just kidding about that..
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 22
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/7/2008 8:21:44 PM

I once had a g/f that, when talking amongst her friends, would refer to me as "the penis".


In the same vein, I referred to my last BF as "the meat" or "meat". He was more than just meat, but my pals didn't need to know that.

I just say my man.. or sometimes to be obnoxious.. "whatshisface". I feel too old to use the word boyfriend. Actually, I'll be 38 soon, yet I've felt too old to say boyfriend for over 10 years.

I still stumble over it sometimes.

I feel compelled to fit in with the times and go for something politically correct.. so as not to offend anyone...

Something like "non- labeled person that I tend to want to rub up against 15 or 20 times per week"
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 31
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/10/2008 9:49:23 AM
Mary.. what's the big deal about explaining who M is?? I didn't check your profile, I'm not sure how old you are.. the only reason one would have any problems introducing who they are spending time with is if they were embarassed or ashamed of that person.

Took me a long time to admit to people I was seeing a younger man. It isn't so much that I have an issue being with him, but there is a SIGNIFICANT age difference and I just didn't want to have them harrassing me about it. I sucked that up a while ago, well.. as far as my friends are concerned... the family is still a different story. Altho my dad kind of figured it out and has taken to calling my guy my "boy toy"... probably just to bug me.

I simply introduce him as my friend to the majority of people we run into. Not everyone needs to know the details of that friendship. We don't have your typcial bf/gf kind of relationship, and I don't want to share all the nitty gritty with everyone.
 Dumpling-Girl
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 40
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/12/2008 11:38:20 PM
hahaha, man muffin is my favourite so far. How about "my sweet" for the very vague. I have no problem with "boyfriend" and if it's serious enough, I use "my partner" (if we are living together). I knew an older woman who used "gentleman caller" but that kind of sounds a bit more casual than a real boyfriend to me. How about something cheesy like "my main squeeze"
 knutcase
Joined: 8/26/2008
Msg: 42
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/13/2008 11:21:12 AM

...and maybe its me, but I think bed buddy, f!ck puppet, the penis, stud muffin, etc. probably would probably generate even more questions. Yes, I know in theory we don't need labels, but its easier once you get the job title right. I like f!ck puppet, but my mother probably wouldn't.... Any other suggestions?.


Significant other, ball and chain, other half, better half (when you are in a good mood), bed warmer, sheet thief, dinner, restrant patron (if he likes to eat out) ..ok that wasnt so good ....dinner partner, life partner, straight life partner, my sweetie, the person I am currently seeing exclusively, my current interest, my hobby, boffing buddy, there are so many to choose from you have to talk to him and see what he is comfortable being called.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 46
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/13/2008 1:54:34 PM
I don't like the whole "label" thing either, and I don't really like getting into who someone is. I usually try and avoid taking them to places where this happens to begin with, but if I have to, I intro them by name.

From there I answer all questions with "maybe", "wouldn't you like to know?" and "he could be"....I do that till people realize I don't want to get into it, and they usually stop asking until I volunteer something.
 knutcase
Joined: 8/26/2008
Msg: 52
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/13/2008 11:06:51 PM
ok and then there is gee "who is what...oh him...I dunno I fed him once and he followed me home...cute aint he. I am thinking about keeping him." Adds humor and gets the point across without being rude.
 knutcase
Joined: 8/26/2008
Msg: 59
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/16/2008 9:46:16 AM

and I need one for church too. LOL


Oh now you have to be difficult....lol....

this is my heavenly sent loneliness eradication, companionship enhancing, physical assimulation partner/friend.

the physical part can be left out but you use so many big words they are like uhh ok thats nice dear.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 60
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/16/2008 9:52:19 AM
In my case, my family is nosy (and so are some of my friends), and unless/until I have been with someone for over six months and it looks like it's gonna be long term, they don't need to know if I am dating/seeing/sleeping with anyone and the nature of the relationship. I don't want to hear advice, what they think I should do, what timeline I should be following, and all that.

Saves me the trouble of having to explain what's going on with him or myself everytime I talk to them...if we break things off then I have to go thru all that when if they don't know in the first place, there's nothing to explain cause they never knew to begin with.

I'm just a private person...to me that stuff is private until I WANT to tell them.
 pittguy37
Joined: 8/16/2008
Msg: 62
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/16/2008 3:07:57 PM
If I've just started dating someone then I refer to them as a friend; if longer and I feel like we're dating exclusively I would say gf.
 JadeMuse
Joined: 11/3/2007
Msg: 70
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/17/2008 10:44:32 AM
I think am more free posting on here with the "boyfriend" label than in real life!

I tend to simply introduce him by full name in person...
I am pretty affectionate ...holding his hand, or squeezing his elbow --tells them most of the story, in any case.

I guess it comes from a time when people have introduced their parents to me in the past as "my mom" or "my dad" without giving me a clue as to how to address them!
A name is more important for any future conversation than who they are to you --I think, anyway... That's the easy part to remember!

I did get a little miffed in college by being called "a friend" when we ....uh... clearly weren't JUST friends after a few months of dating ... I told him to simply introduce me by my name after that.
(BTW... It should have been clue it wouldn't work out!)

If I ask someone about THEIR significant other, I will usually ask how "their Sweetie" or "their Honey" is doing...
--Did I mention that I am bad with names???
 briargate
Joined: 8/18/2008
Msg: 71
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 9/17/2008 1:43:13 PM
I would call him "a friend I have been seeing." He's a friend. You're seeing him. 'Nuff said.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 80
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 12/9/2008 4:12:20 AM

Sadly, it no longer matters... the gentleman and I are no longer seeing each other due to his relocation (different country) ... I think the next one will just be called NEXT!!!

Well, some of us know what happened after this, and what name you actually decided upon, lol. Looking back this thread's kinda funny in light of that.
 NotElvisJunior
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 83
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 12/9/2008 1:45:00 PM
I have to learn NOT to read some of these threads while drinking something . . .beverage-in-sinuses syndrome is remarkably uncomfortable!
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 87
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 12/15/2008 7:07:29 PM
Depends -- how long were you seeing him? How intense was it up until that point?

If you say "my friend" -- that basically means "I'm still single" or "We just met".
If you two have an understanding that you both aren't into relationships right now, saying "friend" would be just fine, even though you are seeing each other.

Other than that, I think "a guy I'm seeing" would be good -- just like you originally posted it.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 95
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 12/22/2008 1:35:11 PM

If you're really with a man, then you're with him. It's not "he's my ... ," but "I'm his."

No, it's both, or neither. No one owns anyone else technically, so if "he's my...." won't work - then "I'm his..." would be equivalent, and wouldn't fly either.
 Sensitive P. Ness
Joined: 12/15/2008
Msg: 96
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 12/22/2008 2:07:39 PM
Well, this may come across sounding like my head is inflated....................

But, you can just call me the P. Nuss
 electrawiz
Joined: 3/27/2008
Msg: 103
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 12/29/2008 6:11:19 PM
Why don't you call him Russel? Then when they meet him just call him your love muscle?!!
 nobrumski
Joined: 4/8/2008
Msg: 110
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 1/10/2009 11:05:32 PM
On one of the podcasts I listen to the couple refer to each other as their seriouso, pronounced ser-i-oso.

They came up with the term after dating for several years and never knowing what to call each other since boyfriend doesn't sound right but at the same time they aren't married or engaged. Personally I like it and thinks it fits for serious couples who just haven't gone onto engagement/marriage and might not plan to.
 Spence56
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 112
OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 1/11/2009 8:19:48 AM
Personally, I think that introducing a new person to family and friends is a lot like introducing them to children. Generally, I don't introduce anyone to anyone unless it's become very serious and we are actually thinking about marriage. It seems unfair to spend a lot of time introducing different people to family and friends only to have the relationship end. Even family and friends get to "like or dislike" anyone you bring to meet them. So it seems mean to do that when you don't know if it's anticipating a long term thing.

The title thing I just ignore. Just telling someone their name is usually enough. The fact that you are together, PDOAs, etc. they can label it however they want. Well, that's what I think anyway...
 DLo!
Joined: 4/23/2008
Msg: 113
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 1/11/2009 10:30:53 AM
I use their name!
 DocElffington
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 117
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OMG... Is that your ? NO come on.. I'm over 30... they're my ???
Posted: 1/25/2009 12:15:23 PM
My "Prospect" ???
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