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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Passing into the dreaded "friends" category      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Mr Bain
Joined: 12/6/2004
Msg: 1
Passing into the dreaded "friends" categoryPage 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Just wanted to get your take on when a woman no longer thinks of you as romantic/sexual interest material. After two brief cordial exchanges without anything earth-shattering happening, are you relegated?

I only ask this question, because this girl who I really like, I've had two brief interactions with. I'm a little worried that she will put them in the friends category as early as today.

I might push the panic button and ask her out tomorrow. That's how critical the situation might be.
 Mr Bain
Joined: 12/6/2004
Msg: 2
Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 8:55:46 AM
I only talked to her twice outside the classroom- each time for about two minutes. LOL...

If I had sex with her already, I wouldn't be worried about being viewed as a friend.
 Ron9
Joined: 8/10/2004
Msg: 3
Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 8:56:44 AM
Females can think anything they want to - about the “friends” crap.

A man and a woman become friends ok - but if it is ever bf/gf ........ the friends comes AFTER the bf/gr. (I did not say a thing about sex)

If I was interested in a gal and she said something like “we can be friends” ...... I would wish her well and get the hell away from her and stay away from her.

------------

One exception ..... if I could tell (and I could tell) if it was just “babble” trying to imply the “friends first” ....... jabber.

Females just refuse to understand - a real two way match is NEVER EVER the same as friends - EVER - not from the first minute.
 Mr Bain
Joined: 12/6/2004
Msg: 4
Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 9:11:52 AM
...next time you see her, why NOT ask her is she wants to have sex with you?


LOL! I wish I could be take this approach without fear. Life would be so much more enjoyable.
 GeneralizingNow
Joined: 10/10/2007
Msg: 5
Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 9:29:48 AM
Life is hard decisions and putting yourself out there--ask her out for lunch or "coffee" after class.
---------------------------
Ron=="Females just refuse to understand - a real two way match is NEVER EVER the same as friends - EVER - not from the first minute."

REALLY?? Good thing we have an expert on the panel today.
 Mr Bain
Joined: 12/6/2004
Msg: 6
Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 9:58:50 AM
I appreciate everyone's input. I will know soon enough, and knowing will be better than not knowing.

I can't get this girl out of my head, no matter how much I masterbate, and no matter how many pictures of Jessica Simpson I look at.
 Diadora
Joined: 6/16/2008
Msg: 7
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Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 10:06:56 AM
Ask her out for dinner . Then if it goes well ask during dinner what movies she was looking forward to seeing and if she names one book a movie date...

Go for it.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 8
Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 11:52:18 AM
Dude you are already losing this one and that is without even talking to her. By "panicking" that you may miss out, you are already approaching her with a defeatist attitude. Relax, take it easy. But first, two conversations does not a date make. But you need to show her some interest. When you see her next, just flat out ask her for her phone number. Then call her and ask her to meet, go out for a drink, do something you have in common.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 9
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Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 12:04:48 PM
Good grief, you made it sound like you had two quickies that went badly, when all you've done is talk to her outside the classroom. This friend/not friend but lover crap, I don't know who came up with that but I'm betting it came from some dorky men's magazine forum. Lots of women won't date someone they don't think of as a friend, others separate the two, who knows, women are not all alike, no two relationships are alike...the best you can do is be yourself, if you are the type of person who wants to date without building up a friendship first, then ask her out, if you like to build a friendship first then spend some time getting to know her. The reality is, either she'll want to date you or she won't, not being yourself will only ruin it.
 Gangster Kitten
Joined: 4/3/2008
Msg: 10
Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 12:51:37 PM

I might push the panic button and ask her out tomorrow. That's how critical the situation might be.


That's your problem right there.


You see... That's not pushing the panic button...

That's called growing some balls.



Pushing the panic button would be coming up to her with a gas can, dousing her with it and lighting her on fire; you scream "IF I CANT HAVE YOU NO ONE WILL!"
 Ntvd7
Joined: 10/15/2006
Msg: 11
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Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/13/2008 3:43:49 PM
"I can't get this girl out of my head, no matter how much I masterbate, and no matter how many pictures of Jessica Simpson I look at."

Bwhahahahahhahaha!

Extra points for being honest _)

But dude, it's just a girl. If it doesn't work out, there are a few others to choose from ;_)
 chuckles27
Joined: 10/10/2008
Msg: 12
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Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 10/14/2008 1:17:43 PM
Just ask her out... The worst a woman can say is no and we have all heard that word since we were small children. Its all good. You will feel a lot better afterwards even if she rejects you..
 Mr Bain
Joined: 12/6/2004
Msg: 13
Passing into the dreaded friends category
Posted: 11/3/2008 10:28:07 AM

You will feel a lot better afterwards even if she rejects you..


I have to say, this turned to out to be very true. I found out that this girl whom I deeply adore, does in fact have a boyfriend and simply is not available.

But oddly enough, I couldn't help smiling after I walked away. The feeling of knowing that I tried. And, in the end, that's all you can do.

Even when she says no, she has an exquisite smile. Time to move on.
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