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 bob144
Joined: 9/30/2008
Msg: 3
Have a good life in a breakup e-mailPage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Case by case. No matter how we bring closure to a relationship someone is going to be hurt. There is a series of emotions that follow loss. Loss, pain, anger, guilt, depression. Loss and pain are inevitable. It is how we respond and handle the pain that is important. Some people respond by expressing anger by saying, "Have a good life," or something even less kind.

My counsel is to just accept it as their way of dealing with their loss and pain. It is a trait that you may have seen that led you to end the connection.

A healthy way, by the way, to deal with loss and pain is not by expressing it, but confessing it. "Ouch that hurt, you are a really wonderful person and I will always treasure our time togheter. I wish you all the best." It is helpful not to make the response goodbye manipulitive but accepting the decision.
 english lass
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 5
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/18/2008 4:18:42 PM
it could be meant sarcastically, it could be meant with sincerity - i'd think that the tone of the rest of the letter would give a hint as to how they mean it

but you can take it as you choose - if you take it as though they were being sincere, then you've brought something positive into your life
 nexthyme
Joined: 9/12/2007
Msg: 6
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Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/18/2008 5:50:52 PM
It is probably case by case, and if you are not fragile, and at the receiving end, then what does it matter if it is snarky or not?

Have a good life, sounds a lot better than I hope you get hit by the next available bus.

I would think someone that has no interest in talking to me ever again, and felt that they were ending things with me, saying have a good life, meant just that, without them in it...
 Wildman46
Joined: 6/4/2008
Msg: 8
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/18/2008 6:18:58 PM
"Please don't write me again, or I will block you"

Kudos to the Op for her compassion towards the feelings of others. Some people would be rude when ending a dating situation, Thank god the Op is the kind of woman that displays nothing but style , grace, and class !! She takes the high road and lets the guys down easy. . It's women like the Op that makes me so very fond of online dating.


That's Sarcasm, just in case you are confused.
 bullielover62
Joined: 12/2/2006
Msg: 10
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/18/2008 7:21:38 PM
Winter, I would suggest not giving any credence to how it's said. "When all is said and done", there's just no need to put any more energy into how things were meant or how you're supposed to take it....

It's done.

Move on.

Wish them well in your mind's eye and keep the positive energy flowing.

Spending even a 'nano sec' on it afterward is a waste of your precious energy.
Think to self that they were being good, kind, sweet and thoughtful and let it go....................

 LLandGirl
Joined: 9/2/2008
Msg: 15
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/18/2008 10:02:05 PM
I agree with the comments and input shared. Don't take it personally, however, I do find the comment to be sarcastic and unnecessary.
When I end an email process or contact with someone I just write "Good luck in your search!"
Maybe that comes across better as it seems more sincere.
 linuxdude
Joined: 10/5/2008
Msg: 16
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/18/2008 10:33:42 PM
FWIW I have sent that when I want to stop corresponding with a woman (sans the exclamation point!).
It is the nicest most final thing I can say that is positive, it's hard to say I wish you the best, now go away and let's not talk LOL

If you are dating in real life and the guy couldn't make the phone call, that is pathetic.
 theforumfiend
Joined: 10/21/2007
Msg: 17
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/18/2008 10:44:35 PM
Since I've never said "have a good life" sarcastically I would assume that, unless it were housed amoungst some pretty mean things, it was meant sincerely.
 Forbidden12
Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 19
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/19/2008 1:13:08 AM
I agree with Bullielover!

If you really want know…. "Have a great life" IMO is 9/10 times meant to be sarcastic.

I really hope you don't say "please do not write me again or I will block your address"

If you do; then its' wonder they sent you that. So you went out with the guy and didn't hit it off, no sense in being rude unless rightfully deserved.
 carelesswhisper00
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 20
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/19/2008 1:19:35 AM
I think a nice way of bringing an end to this is simply by say I wish you the best, or happy fishing and don't give it another thought.
 acitalriwt sixela
Joined: 5/5/2008
Msg: 22
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/19/2008 8:49:52 AM
Is case by case. I believe you can tell by contex if it is sarcasm.

For me, I truely mean this when I say "have a good life." Is my personality to hope people are well, even if I am angry. He must do horrible thing for me to hope he have a miserible life.
 Wildman46
Joined: 6/4/2008
Msg: 23
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 10/19/2008 8:51:18 AM
" DO YOU NEED TO KNOW IN ORDER TO GET THE LAST WORD IN"

Bingo, somebody that finally gets it. the Op loves to argue, and she would hate to have some guy she dumped get in the last zinger. But she also wants to make sure before she sents that last insult it's deserving, Thus this rather silly thread .

 GoneSailinBabe
Joined: 7/6/2008
Msg: 32
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/26/2009 7:30:37 PM
My opinion is you are really searching cracks for something to over think.

Who cares what is meant by it when you're ending the relationship with this person?

Lord.
Learn to let go and not over analyze.
 karma1160
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 33
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/26/2009 8:50:43 PM
It is no more snarky than saying please don't email me again or I will block your address. geeeeeez I can see you blocking someone if they continue but why threaten someone if you are trying to wish them well.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 34
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/26/2009 9:01:09 PM

I think the phrase "have a good life" is a bit passive/aggressive.

I completely agree. I didn't get broken-up with via email ~ a month post-trauma I did receive an email which said "have a good life, ______" There is no doubt in my mind is was definitely passive/aggressive. The irony? He was the one who wanted out until he noticed I was gone and NOT going back. That brings me to an infamous cliche: Be careful what you wish for.
 ComplekCity
Joined: 1/17/2011
Msg: 35
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/18/2011 3:30:02 PM
When Joe says it he means it, but when Fred says it he's being sarcastic.

But , you can usually tell by the way they type it.

Either way, much worse can be said sarcastic or not.
 VacationGuy234
Joined: 8/1/2008
Msg: 36
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/18/2011 4:27:50 PM
OK, I will clue you in: It means not one thing more or less than, "wishing you all the best" or "Please don't write to me again, or I will block your address."
 kailania
Joined: 4/10/2008
Msg: 37
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/18/2011 10:05:03 PM
to me it appears to be sarcastic.
sincere would be more along the lines of
I wish you the best..
or
good luck in your search.
 bodypro8ra
Joined: 1/24/2011
Msg: 38
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/18/2011 10:34:57 PM
I can copy and paste my reply from the stone age and she isn't even here anymore with her burning question, "What does it mean?" Why did she care? Maybe she was hoping they would die of broken hearts.

Posted: 10/19/2008 2:20:23 PM
"Winter Bouquet: The majority of men are the supplicants on this site. You have a little bit of power. Do you enjoy that? Sounds like you are gloating to me.
I don't get "blow off" emails. Not often. They are not necessary. I figure it is like a game of tag. Whoever received the last email is "it". In other words, if I don't get a response, that's it. Over. They ain't interested. They were abducted by aliens . They met the guy that is every thing I'm not and never will be. Whatever. They gone! Good by! No, I don't need to look like an a$$hole and get the last word in. They clearly are not interested in me nor do they care about me except in the service of a bogus self image in the service of their sense of self worth. That has nothing to do with me, my life or my happiness.
Addendum: Why make a drama of it? Don't threaten to block them, block them. Problem solved. Sometimes you got to be cruel to be kind. They'll live. Plenty of other fish."
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 39
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/19/2011 5:00:48 AM
Ask YOURself why you would care what others say or think????? Maybe you should take and learn how to recieve a couple of shots here and there. It will help you to toughen up a bit. Ya know,for the real world.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 40
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/19/2011 12:17:31 PM
Obviously it's going to mean something different depending on who says it. However, if it's over - does it matter?
 forumfishie
Joined: 9/17/2009
Msg: 41
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/19/2011 1:16:35 PM
I have a male friend who finds it really insulting
and sarcastic when a woman he breaks up with says or writes "take care"

To him is like a F-U for Cristmas like Eminem says

I guess for some people anything that is not a "I would love to continue seeing you"
sounds like an insult
 JRodriguez81
Joined: 2/24/2010
Msg: 42
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/19/2011 2:49:23 PM


When I end a goodbye email I will say something sincere like "wishing you all the best" or "Please don't write to me again, or I will block your address." (Hey - ya gotta admit, that's sincere!)

So give me a clue, someone. Is "have a good life" always sarky, or should it be read on a case-by-case basis?

I'd hate to receive someone's sarcasm and not be suitably stung by it!





Why do you care about it either way?
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 43
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/19/2011 4:00:28 PM

I guess for some people anything that is not a "I would love to continue seeing you" sounds like an insult

+1
 viper1j
Joined: 11/30/2005
Msg: 44
Have a good life in a breakup e-mail
Posted: 2/20/2011 8:10:06 AM
I usually respond by saying: "It's cool, your sister said I shouldn't talk to you anymore if I want her to keep sleeping with me. " ;-p
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