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Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Picking up/ dropping off disagreement      Home login  
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 TxBluEyes74
Joined: 7/15/2008
Msg: 19
Picking up/ dropping off disagreementPage 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Here we all see a woman who sees things only one way.... Her Way!

The problem is, that you are not willing to compromise with the exchanges. We all understand as parents the importance of school projects and out of school activities and I give you kudos for taking your child to these functions. But give the dad his due, We have heard your side and I'm sure if he was posting on this thread we would see the other side of this story. So what are you to do as parents? One word... SHARE

Either have him pickup or drop off the child and you do the other, or change it up every weekend. The point is, your are trying to battle your ex with something that is so superficial it's really up senseless.
 dbmf250
Joined: 11/7/2008
Msg: 20
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Picking up/ dropping off disagreement
Posted: 11/19/2008 6:36:56 AM
My take on this is you really need to look at your situation and determine what is going to be the best physically, emotionally and mentally for the CHILD/CHILDREN involved and make the situation as much a "positive" influence as you can. Everyone's situation has differences although quite a few could be lumped together in various catagories so that you could say " In this situation do so and so" but this is not the case with all. Step back, look at your situation, leave your emotions out of it, make the most positive choice for the child. Try to look at it from a child view point.

Example: If "you" take the child/children to the other parent you are mentally telling the child that "you" are not keeping them from the other parent. (This is a positive in many situations but most definantly not in all.)
 philrook
Joined: 1/20/2005
Msg: 24
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Picking up/ dropping off disagreement
Posted: 11/19/2008 10:18:49 AM
This is where the bitter feelings start and the only ones that pay are the kids. Have you ever heard the saying that good fences make good neighbours. Its true even when dealing with your ex.

So here is the problem, you both don't agree on what the right thing to do. Its very frustrating and until you and your ex sit down and communicate your feelings and your frustrations this is going to spiral out of control.

Don't get all tied up in a knot over this. Sit down like adults and work out the details of your separation to whatever level makes you feel comfortable and addresses the issues that matter to you. Then if anything else comes up either accept it or renegotiate ... its really that simple.
 TxBluEyes74
Joined: 7/15/2008
Msg: 27
Picking up/ dropping off disagreement
Posted: 11/19/2008 6:50:06 PM
Who knows maybe it's the way you come across or don't come across. The point being, you are on here making a BIG deal out of something so stupid. If you have serious issues or concerns with your current arrangements for driving six miles LMAO. Well then take your ass to a mediator at the district court and have it agreed then and there. And then follow through with your commitments.

Does it really have to go to court because the two of you can not come to a 100% complete agreement?

Do you understand how this sounds?
 freetime2bme
Joined: 1/16/2006
Msg: 32
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Picking up/ dropping off disagreement
Posted: 11/20/2008 12:54:35 PM
It is in my court order that the ex picks them up and dropps them off at my house. The more that is in the order with regards to this stuff the better. In fact the order goes on to say if the pick up is 30 min or more late the visit can be terminated. I have never enforced that part, but have called to ask are you coming, only to get not this week. If not in the order I would try to split the drop off pick up. Try to keep the peace.
 techgirl27
Joined: 9/5/2005
Msg: 33
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Picking up/ dropping off disagreement
Posted: 11/20/2008 8:10:57 PM
I have had this "problem" from time to time, but actually it got to the point where he was SO sloppy in his own dropoff and pickup times that I decided I have more control doing it myself.

If you drop off or pick up, then you dont have to wait in for anyone. I found this actually helped me sometimes because when I did the driving I stopped being late places.
 4UMaybe
Joined: 8/3/2007
Msg: 36
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Picking up/ dropping off disagreement
Posted: 11/21/2008 10:26:21 AM
It would be easiest to specify this in the divorce agreement...I don't agree with many poster above about he picks her up then you go get her after visitation....I don't know what your custody/physical/joint is but it sounds like you have physical which means all other driving...to lessons, friends etc....I think it is the dad's responsibility to pick up drop off...
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