Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Am I doing the right thing?      Home login  
Joined: 10/10/2006
Msg: 2
Am I doing the right thing?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I guess you need to simply ask yourself a few questions get to the heart of it i.e.
Do you really like being with him?
Does he treat you well and with respect?
Is it really just the dancing you enjoy so much?
What do you want from this guy and can he give it to you?
The best advice I can give you is to never make anyone a priority when they insist on making you just an option. A beautiful young modern woman like you can surly do much better than that!
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 5
Am I doing the right thing?
Posted: 1/5/2009 4:51:36 AM
In reply to your thread, may I just break it down a bit based on your words::

* You saw each other in the Xmas concert.
* Four days later he told you he had lung cancer which was spreading quickly.
* The same night he broke up with you.
* He said it was because he didnt want to stress you and just wanted to be friends now.
* In May, after seeing you a few times, he asks you to go dancing.
* Then months later you see him again, (with a date,) but he goes up and hugs you.
* He still is actively dancing by this stage.
* He leaves his girlfriend standing alone whilst you two dance.
* This has happened 3 or 4 times.

Dear OP. How rapid was his cancer? He has been active and happily dancing with you for what appears to be getting on for perhaps 8 months or so?
He broke up with you but since got himself another girlfriend.

I dunno, OP. you seem like a very mature and caring person.

All I can say is that if you're OK with deleting him from Facebook, your phone etc, whilst going dancing with him as a friend, with his girlfriend watching, well it's your call.
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 6
view profile
Am I doing the right thing?
Posted: 1/5/2009 5:11:13 AM


Read the OP'S Post

What you have written has got nothing to do with the post PFFFT!!!!!

Mate if you need help, post your own thread!!!
One question though ,why are you on here looking for long term????

For the love of god Paragraphs please
Joined: 10/10/2006
Msg: 7
Am I doing the right thing?
Posted: 1/5/2009 6:53:31 AM

Your story certainly merits its own discussion but your not providing much help to the OP’s post sir. A possible attempt to sympathize with the OP through comparison perhaps was your intention I can understand that. Otherwise it seemed rather rude to me. See if you can have it moved to your own post so miss cowtowncowgirl can have the attention she deserves on her own thread.
Joined: 1/19/2008
Msg: 8
view profile
Am I doing the right thing?
Posted: 1/5/2009 8:11:54 AM
Posts 5 and is so hard to say politely, and I thought the same thing.....If he is in treatment, say chemotherapy, he would be pale and tired. If the disease had progressed, he would be thin and ill.
OP, as previously stated, IF the cancer story was just that...a story....that is totally wrong to do to someone.
But if he is truly sick, and dancing doesn't make you sad or angry, then it really is okay.
Joined: 12/29/2005
Msg: 14
Am I doing the right thing?
Posted: 1/6/2009 4:36:11 AM
OP I agree with the other posters...LUNG CANCER and he's still at the Bar, and in a DANCE CONTEST...

OP...I dont know if you were born at night, But OP you'er 19, you wernt born LAST night.

Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 28
Am I doing the right thing?
Posted: 4/10/2009 12:03:37 PM
hi op; yes of course you are giving mixed signals; you are trying to pay him back for making you feel bad; it's kind of selfish to be honest.

get over it or just move on; it's a little childish what you did; stop the rudeness and childish behavior; you arent' a teen anymore and should know better. good luck
Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Am I doing the right thing?