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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > well i asked her, but got no reply      Home login  
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 2
well i asked her, but got no replyPage 1 of 1    
I'm assuming the no reply thing is basically because she didn't want to hurt you by being honest - maybe she felt that even tho you said you were ok with her not feeling the same, that it would create tension at work, or make you feel bad.

If she was into you, I'm sure she would have been pleasantly surprised, and you'd have found out pretty quickly. Chances are she already knew and just avoided it.

But maybe that's just how I'm looking at it.
Joined: 7/1/2008
Msg: 6
well i asked her, but got no reply
Posted: 1/5/2009 11:47:45 AM
Exactly what DJ said. I always sense when a man I'm around often is into me - I think most women do. The easy way out is we give no signals whatsoever we're interested beyond friendly.
Now, you know her personality. Is she the shy, quiet type or the go-getter?
If a go-getter gets a green light from a man, she acts on it if she's interested.
Joined: 5/19/2006
Msg: 12
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well i asked her, but got no reply
Posted: 1/5/2009 6:55:04 PM
If you got interrupted by what was going on around you, then I think she's probably wondering when you'll get back to the subject and ask her again. She may not give the answer you want to hear, but she might be too shy to bring the subject up herself, especially if she believes the guy should do the chasing. That can't be her real name, surely? It's great.
Joined: 5/18/2008
Msg: 13
well i asked her, but got no reply
Posted: 1/5/2009 6:59:43 PM
Yes, the ball is now in her court.

..and congratulations on using your own balls.

Next time will be easier.
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 14
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well i asked her, but got no reply
Posted: 1/5/2009 7:04:02 PM
Welp... my reply is probably much like everyone else here.

HOWEVER.... are you absolutely certain she heard, understand and got what you said?

I know it sounds dumb but she might have not gotten what you tried to communicate.

I had a friend... who I adored for a long time. He constantly told me there was nothing there and I shut off the emotions and decided to be friends only... actually FWB and my emotions are very hidden to make that work! He told me early he was not monogamous but would stay with someone he loved forever. I assume I'm part of his harem... and I date others and continue FWB. He tells me 4 yrs in that he hasn't been with anyone else other than me since we were together. I asked him about his statement earlier and he says he's never wanted to. One day we're chatting about how much we care for each other (not unusual in 90% of my female friendships since we always say we love each other)... all of these things I ignore because I'm no in the place to listen for him to say "hey I love you" because I can't listen to little messages and keep my emotions in check. I devastate him one day with an off hand comment saying I wouldn't have kids with him (he loves me and that's what people do in love... and I assume we're just FWB so why'd we have a baby?)... and legitimately I didn't know because he never came right out and asked me out on a date or asked to change anything. In a way, it's true... I wasn't super into it because I might have been listening to it if I was. But I had suppressed my emotions because of the situation so I didn't specifically hear the little clues and some of the less subtle messages.

So from that place... you didn't ask her out... you said you'd be sad if you didn't give things a chance which didn't ask for a reply or action. Maybe she thinks you are getting a shot (how does one define that?)... and maybe you are being aloof because you're hurt and now she's confused because there are strange vibes.... to which she's less likely to confess any feelings she might have. You didn't ask a question that needed an answer... and you didn't get an answer. Your interaction was ambiguous and you've got ambiguous results... this means it's hard to say what you should do. Both of you could be thinking the other should act next... or............... she could be hoping you never bring it up again. I'd probe again in private when you're not going to be bothered by 3rd parties... you'll get a better read on her
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