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Joined: 12/7/2008
Msg: 1
Is he interested or just being friendlyPage 1 of 1    
So me and my friend were talking the other day about how we have no clue when a guy is hitting on us. Someone pretty much has to come right out and say they are interested in me otherwise I just think the guy is being nice or friendly. So I thought maybe I could ask you guys some advise on how to tell the differnce.
And how do I let them know im interested. I have "Zero" game... like um none lol and am wayyyy to shy at first (I get over that after about an hour of knowing someone lol ) to make the first move.

Can you give me some suggestion on how to tell the differnce and where to go from there?

Thanks a bunch :)
Joined: 1/16/2009
Msg: 2
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 11:35:00 AM
i'm probably the worst person to talk about this. i generally keep myself to myself as i naturally assume people aren't interested in me.

I don't flirt or do any of the obvious things... i am always performing random acts of kindness for everyone and don't generally show any signs of favouritism.

I'm poker faced and impossible to read most of the time.

Look for them sneaking glances, looking for opportunities to be "nice or friendly" rather than you instigating the nice or friendly response. If they are trying really hard to be funny.

Me i'm useless at showing someone i'm interested.
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 3
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 12:21:56 PM
well, i am a big flirt, so i maybe able to shed some light, see with me if ive honestly never met you before, and im walking up to you then chances are im going to flirt, tone of voice, eye movements, body language its all readable you just got to see it, sometimes when a guy flirts (not all the time mind you just saying from how i am) generally they lower their voice a little, make it a little smoother, eye contact is easiest way, you see his eyes moving up to down or sticking right on yours chances are hes flirting.

unless you have an unnaturally small rack ofcourse cause i dont know any guy who doesnt check out atleast the chest goods before holding a convo even if its just casual, anyways biggest way to see if they are flirting, is smiling alot, if they smile when they say something and its not the slightest bit funny chances are it was flirting,.

other then that you just need to pay closer detail, flirting is quite easy to see, you just arent looking for it

this is just me and how i am tho, so dont need no other guys telling me im wrong :P
 Concerto de Tucson
Joined: 1/15/2009
Msg: 4
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 12:31:06 PM
Don't let that "zero game" thing discourage you too much. Genuine authenticity is quite appealing to many men. Some men who allow themselves to be taken by a woman who's "got game" may be transfixed at first with the act, buy into it, naively believe that is the person he has offered his heart to, spend years blind to the disorienting fog surrounding the performance, and then wake up one day asking himself the profound question, "Who IS this person?", so I've heard.

Don't manufacture signals or some arbitrary techniques to make yourself come across as more appealing. Be yourself. The guy who is able to recognize, cherish and celebrate that will be a fortunate man. And when he appears, I'm pretty sure you'll know.
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 5
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 12:39:58 PM
The eyes.
Watch the eyes. If someone is enchanted with you ....their eyes light up and their whole face lightens up when ever you are near them or engage them in conversation.

Best way to take it to the next level.
Tell them directly that you are attacted to them and want to have sex with them as soon as possible.

Or tell them you want to discuss something with them in private. Take them to somewhere private, a washroom, closet, basement, bedroom, than drop to your knees and give them the best blowjob of their life! They will from that point on be yours.
This is what guys want. Sex is the best tool to use to cement the friendship into a relationship.

The most simple fact of catching a guy.
Don't play hard to get!!!
Play hard to keep......have amazing sex with them on the first date and let them chase you for a second date!!

It is a technique called....cutting to the chase
Joined: 5/12/2007
Msg: 6
view profile
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 1:35:13 PM
when you subconsciously start flipping or touching your hair he knows you are interested. When both of your faces light up when you see each other you have common interests. Sticking around just a little longer than needed to see if he's gonna give you his card or ask for your number lets him notice you are interested. The guy in the store that shows up in every other isle and trys to make eye contact is interested.

Some are interested but wont act on it due to prior commitments. Others are interested but simply dont have the where with all at the time to date. More times than not when he's talking to you and he could be doing anything else, he's interested. Will he act on it? That's a different question.

J Mac
Joined: 4/20/2008
Msg: 7
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 1:44:34 PM
This always has worked well, is that a roll of certs in your pocket or you just happy to see me...
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 8
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 1:55:44 PM
simple: IF HE'S TALKING TO YOU -HE'S HITTING ON YOU. -i have noticed if a girl is really interested she will banter back -sometimes to the point of her busting your balls (metaphorically of course) she's trying to see if you have the balls to pick up on her.
if your a shy gal -just be agreeable or ask questions and comment back with "that sounds like fun" (hint hint) -if you like him and he still hasn't asked for your number. say something like he could text you sometime (less invasive than calling)

o/p: if your shy, practice makes perfect -try talking to strangers in comfortable public places -just to get the feel.
Joined: 8/10/2004
Msg: 9
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 2:07:59 PM
Eye contact ...........

Serious - respectful (not talking pervs here) eye contact.

A glance ....... don't get the job done. A peek and looking away - don't get the point across.

Serious eye contact - says "I notice you - I see you - I like what I see - do you?"

Most people can tell the difference between silly lust (honest sincere lust is not silly) and sincere - "I would like to know you" eye contact.


OP - you don't need game - just be honest and sincere. If you see a guy that you would like to know - look at him right in the eyes. Even if it is clear across a room full of people. Look right in his eyes - nothing else in the room matters ...... you noticed HIM.
Joined: 2/2/2009
Msg: 10
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 2:22:43 PM
To find out if he is interested in you, just stare into his eyes and smile. If he smiles back and stares into your eyes, then he is definetly interested in you. If he is just being friendly he might not stare at you, and just smile a breif second.
Joined: 10/2/2008
Msg: 11
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 3:24:59 PM
Well there's a number of things a guy will do when he's interested:

Complimenting you.
Being cheeky.
Suggesting scenarios - say, like saying thing like: if me and you were... wouldn't it be funny.
Keeping all the attention on you - asking about your life and complimenting your achievements.

Basically being really really nice.
 ThievesInThe Night
Joined: 9/17/2008
Msg: 12
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 3:30:34 PM
If it is a guy you do not know and you sense he is trying to start a conversation with you, as a general rule, always assume that he is interested in you. Personally, I do not have conversations with women I do not know and am not interested in. In addition, most heterosexual guys, at least the ones I know, do not approach and talk to women with the end goal of being her platonic friend; it's usually because they want a sexual relationship.

For guys that you already know and are in your life, it is harder to tell and usually, one of you have to make the first move and if he doesn't, you should. If he asks about your relationship status that's a sign. If he asks you to "hang out" and it hasn't been established that you are only friends that is a sign as well.

You don't have to have game, just be able to carry on a decent conversation. For me, all a woman has to do to indicate that she is interested in me is to smile when I am talking to her and seem interested in the conversation, i.e. answer questions not using one word or sentence answers, ask questions about me and if I run out of things to say, bring up her own conversation topics. Brief touching, sitting close to me, saying that we should "hang out" or meet up somewhere and giving me your cell phone number if I ask for it and picking up the phone when I call are all good signs to show interest.

Anyway, you are better off assuming that guys that approach you and talk to you are interested instead of being friendly. If you are wrong and he turns out to not be interested, it is far from being the end of the world.
Joined: 1/20/2008
Msg: 13
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 3:39:43 PM
LOL>>>LOL lol lol lol lol lol lol
Joined: 8/6/2008
Msg: 14
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 3:52:33 PM's the need a friend to be somewhere near you...okay...when he's talking with you, drop something, anything, a pencil, large hint' and when you bend over, give him an eyefull, and when you stand upright, go back to the convo...two things will occur...#1 if he's interestito', he would've picked it up for you, or met you halfway...the ol' knock knoggins......#2 use some secret code word body language with your friend....that when you're standing back up and she says the code word, you'll aready have that ability while in the act to have the confidence to ask for a number or whatever angle you choose.

For me, the eyes truly do the talking. If a guy is being nice....he simply wants you...Like the guy that's nice and is just nice for being nice, he's either gay...or an outdated Beta rental....some of you just google Beta...VHS and Beta....Beta lost...because I've totally outdated myself and caused a war with the gay population....but they know it's true...LOL...chill peeps all good. Some guys are just nice. If he's nice with granny and used the same mannerisms with you to her, he's either a perv, or the aforementioned.

Take Care.
Joined: 10/13/2005
Msg: 15
view profile
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 6:10:43 PM
Most guys will flirt with you but some are really reserved like me,most of the time I wait for her to make the first move so I dont disrespect her.
Joined: 2/6/2009
Msg: 16
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 10:14:28 PM
This is the exact question I want to know!!! There's 2 guys I like at work, and both those 2 guys are pretty much the only guys that make acknowledgment of my existence and say hey to me that are not gay. lol One of them seems kinda shy, and only waves and says hi to me, plus he smiles. I've never actually had a conversation with him though, and unfortunately, I rarely see him, as he works mornings, while I work evenings most the time. The other guy, he says hey, and talks to me, and I've had convos with him, but he doesn't really smile when he says hey and talks to me like the first guy does. If either of them were to like me more than the other, I'd say the first guy. And then there is this guy that works at night, and I think it's obvious he's interested in me, cuz I told him my name once, and he remembered it correctly from then on. (I have a very different name) And he's always making time to talk to me... But I'm not interested in him so much.... D: So yeah, I don't know if I should try to do something with these guys, or what....
Joined: 1/2/2009
Msg: 17
view profile
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/14/2009 10:45:18 PM

And how do I let them know im interested.
jetcitygypsy, I suggest that you just look at them the same way you are looking at the camera in your pics.
Joined: 1/4/2006
Msg: 18
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/15/2009 12:40:55 AM
as someone said before..generally speaking..if a guy is talking to, because he approached you and is having a conversation..its because he wants to fnck you..plain and simple...always assume he is interested
Joined: 1/30/2009
Msg: 19
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/15/2009 2:18:23 AM
If he starts humping your leg, he's probably interested. Might just be his way of being friendly... Hmm, I guess I can see where the confusion comes in.
Joined: 10/19/2008
Msg: 20
view profile
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/15/2009 2:57:16 AM
Well simple, his eyes will say a lot if you pay attention to them, will try to physical contact, will ask for attention. He might compliment you every once in a while but that wouldn't mean that much. Now before the first date i suggest you at least talked to him once on the phone, to get ready to the first date.

I first date, well i don't care what other guys said, use the old girl rules: no sex on first dates and don't go any further than kissing, if you do it might just end up being a one night stand and you don't want that. On second dates well, if things only gotten better with him than you can do whatever you want with him.

If you decide to play the card of ignorance to see how much he cares about you and all, i don't suggest you play it for too long or too harshly, some guys (including me) will just end up being tired of waiting over nothing and move on. Hope it helped,

Joined: 12/7/2008
Msg: 21
Is he interested or just being friendly
Posted: 2/15/2009 8:57:22 AM
Got it Taelus..leg humping is a definate sign..I'll remeber that. Now that is funny I dont care who you are... lol
There some great feedback on here, some funny stuff as well. Thanks a bunch for the info... So I got the signs now to look for now that lets me know hes interested vs being friendly. So other then taking him to a closet for some "private time" as one friend mentions ;) (Sorry just not that direct of a girl yet lol ) How do I give him the green light to let him know im interested.. What do guys look for as a signal a girl is interested.
Just keep in mind here as I mentioned in the beginnning, I have no game in the beggining.. Zip,Zilch Nadda..Now once im in, im a total flirt and open with someone im dating on every level.. but its getting off the bench and letting them know im intersted thats still confusing. :)

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