Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > Divorced Vs Separated      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Rushâ„¢
Joined: 2/17/2009
Msg: 6
Divorced Vs SeparatedPage 1 of 1    
I just don't think people who are married/seperated should be on sites like these, period. Unless of course, it's the forums only.
 Rushâ„¢
Joined: 2/17/2009
Msg: 12
Divorced Vs Separated
Posted: 3/5/2009 8:54:59 AM

Rush... with the economy and stuff as it is right now, many ppl are legally separating vs divorcing. In fact, I just watched a Prime Time piece (or one of those news shows) about how COMMON it is for even divorced couples to be still living together b/c the economy is so bad and they can't financially make it on their own or whatever.


I couldn't imagine how awkward that must be. The economy is a real bust, and it's unfortunate that a lot of us have to go through such anguish.
 Deemitt
Joined: 11/17/2008
Msg: 16
view profile
History
Divorced Vs Separated
Posted: 3/5/2009 10:31:23 AM
Kevin,

I would say you are "separated" in the field, but down in your profile explain the situation. Normally I wouldn't look at a profile that says "separated," but if I did have an interest still I would read the rest of the profile.

I actually read one of a guy on here that was in a similar situation as you. He was technically married, but separated for three years and he stated there was no chance he was going back with his wife. I thought, okay that leads me to believe that there might not be as much unfinished business as I would have thought at first. I should give that type of person a chance.

Be honest with yourself, you do not want to go into a situation lying.
 Lucette325
Joined: 2/2/2005
Msg: 20
view profile
History
Divorced Vs Separated
Posted: 3/6/2009 12:56:46 AM
Yes definitely put "Separated" and a short explanation. You've been separated an awfully long time... I know I wouldn't date someone who is freshly separated (at least a year), as the possibility that they are not yet ready to move on is greater in this time period. Time does heal all wounds and if it's just that some papers have yet to be filed in court, I'd say you're as dateable as someone who is single or divorced.

I have been separated for almost six years.

I rarely get questioned as to why such a long separation without divorce. It's not really all that uncommon these days. Everyone has their reasons... usually it's finance. Divorce can get expensive, especially if both parties cannot come to agreement easily (which is more likely when the marriage dissolution is fresh). Every visit to the lawyer and every amendment to the Order costs money. In my case, it's that I feel that HE should file for divorce, since he's the one who chose to cheat, and then chose to leave. He wanted out, so he should formally end it... though it's looking like I may just have to go ahead and do it myself.
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > Divorced Vs Separated