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 Yankee_Girl
Joined: 12/30/2008
Msg: 2
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why do women include their employmentPage 1 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
I might mention it because if I have my own career it may indicate that I have my own money and am not interested in yours.
 RobertKoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 3
why do women include their employment
Posted: 3/31/2009 7:19:10 AM
Don't mix education with indoctrination.
 SophisticatedPlebian
Joined: 3/26/2009
Msg: 4
why do women include their employment
Posted: 3/31/2009 7:35:32 AM
I post my career because it can be an issue in a relationship and on some level, I want to be acknowledged as a person that has acheived some success in life. I am not materialistic by the way and I could care less what a man does for a living as long as he makes a living and is happy and productive in his life. I am formally educated however and I don't think it is being snotty to say I probably have more in common with a man that is also an educated professional, or at least has life experiences that have seasoned him as a person, than I would with say a twenty two year old student. We look for common ground in order to relate to each other I think.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 6
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 3/31/2009 8:34:40 AM
Because it's there!
and I am not ashamed to answer it!
even if I worked at a convience store I would answer it.
I am.........who I am.
 Redlance71
Joined: 2/2/2009
Msg: 7
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 3/31/2009 8:52:16 AM
Is it just me or does this thread simply not seem to belong in the sex and dating section? Wouldn't it be better in the relationship area or ask a girl area?

I don't mind women who list thier occupation. If I was looking I'd pay some attention to it as I prefer a woman who shows ability to take care of herself and that usually means they have a career already. I make just shy of 6 digits but am still blue collar worker in a career I enjoy. Finding a woman who makes decent money is a plus because it likely means they wont be all that interested in mine lol! Also, a career minded woman will likely have more in common with me than a 22 year old working at the liquor store or Burger King. Not that I would discount a woman in those fields(my ex wife did those jobs) but still it's mainly about compatibility. Unfortunatly this has a drawback. Whenever I met or went on a date with a woman who made close to my income or more they tended to act very independent and high and mighty. I got the feeling that if I had actually dated those they'd have a superiority complex. I was raised by a single professional mom who taught me such an attitude was rude and innapropriate. Why those women thought it was okay I have no idea. Needless to say I burned their numbers and memory from my mind.
 SophisticatedPlebian
Joined: 3/26/2009
Msg: 8
why do women include their employment
Posted: 3/31/2009 9:16:03 AM
Informed choice...would be really a great way to start any relationship wouldn't it?

From your keyboard to god's ear sister LOL. I would love to have all the pertinent information to at least determine if there is some interest there before I get stuck in an endless loop of meaningless dating. I know we all have to kiss some toads before we find Prince Charming (analogy by the way, I am not looking for a fairytale) but, it would certainly help people from wasting each others time if they would just tell the truth
 2HEDZ
Joined: 3/16/2005
Msg: 10
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 3/31/2009 11:13:40 AM

I work in a special field which requires special training, education, and licensing or certification and I never mention it.


you just did.
 Pitch Blease
Joined: 3/4/2009
Msg: 11
why do women include their employment
Posted: 3/31/2009 11:52:46 AM

If a woman puts it out there, she is likely wanting all the neurotic men who think every woman is after his money to know she has her own and will not be chasing after his big whoppin $40,000.00 a year pay check..

Oh better be careful with that figure. I got read the riot act in another thread by saying I would be homeless if I made that considering where I live and the cost of living in my city. It's enough to send men to third world countries looking for wives!
 ~rain~
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 12
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 3/31/2009 12:24:22 PM
I am just interested in finding the one who can help me in my plight for world domination!

Then after I have succeeded I will bite off his head and eat him!!
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 16
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 1:13:43 AM

I do think it's important. a person's profession can tell alot about them. it gives you an idea of their education and even possible character traits. if you are 50 years old and have a minimum wage job at a convenience store in comparison to a 50 yr old vet or vet technician - most likely they'd be very different people

Well, it might tell you a lot about them, but it does not necessarily do so; most people make their decision on a career choice before they have any experience in that field, and wind up being stuck in it, having invested years of school or training before learning too late that perhaps they would have rather done something else. And, too many people make immediate judgments based on what they think you are based on your job. As far as character traits, well, that's wrong too. There are kind hearted assassins, and evil nurses and doctors. Evil child care workers and kind beneficial used car salesman. Yes, you can have a doctorate but that does not necessarily mean you are an enlightened open minded person, nor that you are any nicer than the homeless man on the corner. Use your gut; read what they write; talk and meet. Then make your decision to see if you want to know more about them.

Seriously... a successful person is a more attractive person because it displays their confidence in themselves much faster than would be evident by other means.

This is commonly a female viewpoint, and I understand where it's coming from. But most men aren't concerned about how successful or not a woman is in her field, more that she enjoys what she does, and more important, that she enjoys being with him and doing what he likes to do. And her profession choice won't give him any clue about that, unless of course, she's a porn star or something along those lines.
 Blondecharmthe3rd
Joined: 8/7/2008
Msg: 17
why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 3:44:59 AM
Regardless of what you are looking for, common interests can be a huge difference in the chemistry between two people. I am a student, for medical office administration... but have worked in a variety of different fields and feel comfortable with any profession.

But I am working hard towards this goal, so I am darn proud of it. It has meant too in the past its eaten into my time. I need someone who understands what motivates me.
 pieomy
Joined: 8/22/2007
Msg: 20
why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 12:17:18 PM
careers are more important to women than men in finding a mate, just how it is. On average women will list ambitious as a high priority in a mate, where as men it will be on average not a very huge concern.

Don't ask me why this is, it just is.

I made the mistake of putting up how much i made on this site and got like 100% more emails than I had when I hadn't posted it. Just using this as an example to prove a point.
 Redlance71
Joined: 2/2/2009
Msg: 22
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 1:41:58 PM

because your profession says a lot about you

agree
sometimes-miss, [qoute]most people make their decision on a career choice before they have any experience in that field, and wind up being stuck in it, having invested years of school or training before learning too late that perhaps they would have rather done something else

I don't agree on this in general. A soldier usually knows what to expect in thier training field. Health care workers same.

There were 2 huge reasons I did not list my career + income. Firstly, there are gold diggers out there and my profession attracts them in my region. My job is recession proof and great benefits and pay, except for an Army stint I've been at this profession 14 years now. When I listed specifically what I did on my profile and income I got hit with 3 times the normal contacts. I don't make the stereotypes, I just see them. Secondly people in my profession have the dubious rep of being drunken, womanizing, drug pushing, Harley-Davidson fetish, long haired freaks. It should be said that spouses of those in my profession also have a bad rep. I don't fit the stereotypes in any way, in fact people who meet me and find out my job would think I was more likely to be in law enforcement than what I do. Incidently, I am an Engineer with Union Pacific.

I am proud of my profession. When I set up my profile for dating I decided not to advertise my career, house, car, hot tub, dogs or ANYTHING that would be considered assets that could attract a woman. I'd want a woman to be attracted to ME. Yes, this has meant I did not get as many hits either online or at the local social spots when I didn't go waving it all around, but above ALL ELSE in life I am just looking to enjoy life, partner is a plus but not mandatory and I have my own standards lol!
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 23
why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 2:07:52 PM
because your profession says a lot about you

This is such an overgeneralization and I'm surprised it's stated sooooooo many times in a mere 1 3/4 pages of posts. My profession (in the "real world") says little to nothing about me, it's what I do not who I am. Much like many others I would guess.

~OP~ It's a matter of personal preference I suppose. As long as "he's" happy with what he is doing ~ I don't really care what that "doing" is. "Who" he is really is much more important to me than what he does. I do see an increasing number of people who are clearly trying to define themselves by their job/career/profession. I probably did that when I was newly "titled" ~ but that was so long ago I think it's silly to drone on about it. JMO
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 24
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 2:24:14 PM
Well Green, you are both right and wrong on this one, but I do understand your thought process.

If I were happy selling drugs and making good money at it, I still think you WOULD care what my doing really is.

Many times who you are will be represented by what you do, and can also be tied to your education, salary, and goals that you have set for yourself and just maybe those around you.

What I will say about this, is that it is not what you do that should make all the difference to me, but what I do for myself. To many will try to connect their place in life and social settings, by the one they are with, and what they just might do, and not with themselves, which is a much better indicator about who and what you are.

I seek an equal to know and play with, and that will not be determined by the job that they have, or their education level, but much more of the total of their existence and how it fits mine.

Just my opinion......
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 25
why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 2:42:30 PM

Well Green, you are both right and wrong on this one, but I do understand your thought process.

Sorry, but I missed the memo stating that opinions can be "right and wrong."

If I were happy selling drugs and making good money at it, I still think you WOULD care what my doing really is.

Ahhh, the drug dealer reference ~ I love that one. It's so realistic to those of us who have common sense and often times? Actually use it. I see no need to preface every single post, detail the hypotheticals, nor explain myself like a legal brief being filed during a murder trial. But if you want to talk analogies, however, let's begin with Ted Bundy. Brilliant scholar, politically adept/aware. Good looking (if one likes that 70s thing.) The point? He was a serial killer. What he did during the day was GREAT camo, but he was still a sick baastard. Bernie Madoff was employed and I'll bet he'd even buy the coffee (with someone else's cash, of course.) Hell, Rush Limbaugh has a day job ~ does that mean he's datable? Well, if he's really given up the felony forgery and prescription med addiction stuff, some might think so! It's impossible to analyze these things. There are exceptions to every exception and rule.

~OT~ My opinion is still: what he does isn't nearly as important as who he is.
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 26
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 3:18:52 PM
Point well taken........and my opinion will still stand as well.......who one is, can and will, point to what one does in many ways, shapes and forms.

By the way, I use to socialize with many of the sorority girls from that house that Ted Bundy entered and did his deed, long ago, and to this day it has left its mark on that university and sorority.

Just my opinion......
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 27
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 3:43:34 PM

... who one is, can and will, point to what one does in many ways, shapes and forms.
I'm not so sure about that. While I'm a nurse, and also a very caring person (so I've been told by those who know me) I know plenty of nurses that I wouldn't let near me to change a damn band aid. They're some of the most uncaring people I know. They have the bedside manner of a doggone wolverine. (DON'T COME NEAR ME!!!!) Off the job, they apparently have very caring relationships and boyfriends, and such. I have no clue how it is that they are so mean to others while on the job.

I think it's really just a matter of chance that we occasionally find someone who represents themself in life away from the job as well as while on the job. I lived with a mechanical/electrical engineer for several years. While he was very smart and very good at fixing things, I basically knew nothing about his work until we took a combined business & pleasure trip to Germany. There was never a reason for me to know.

While with him in Germany, I learned a lot about what he does because I went out with him and the people he was training over there. I speak German and so I could understand what they were talking about over dinner.

In private, turns out he loved to dance and so we went dancing often and also taught dancing for several years. I highly doubt his fellow mechanical/electrical engineers at work ever suspected that he was such an excellent dancer. All they knew was that he was really good at what he did at work and highly respected him.
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 30
why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/1/2009 7:40:41 PM
I don't really give a crap WHAT he does for a living.. I do give a crap that he at least likes whatever it is.

I put it in my profile, but mainly because so many ask.
 TragicallyHip
Joined: 11/28/2006
Msg: 33
why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/24/2009 4:20:14 AM

I think by reading between the lines of your questions, that what you really want to know is..............Why is money and status important to women?

Or COURSE your personality is important.But it's only one of the things that someone judges when considering expending time on you.


I agree with Closer, this is a thinly veiled "does money matter" thread. In which case, the topic has been discussed extensively already on the forums. BUT, since your profession is keeping you too busy to read the archival material, I'll give you the Cliff's Notes:

Yes, it does.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 36
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/24/2009 6:40:48 AM
I'm proud of what I do.....
as I said before......if I worked at a laundromat...I'd still be proud!
I actually just changed my profession ......because I got a promotion! WOOOT!
I have a career......and that career takes up part of my life.
and a man should know upfront I have responsibilities that will sometimes interfer in my personal life!

and yes......knowing what a man does for a living gives me a bit of insight on his life.
 spitfire6844
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 37
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 4/24/2009 7:18:58 AM
There are plenty of women on here who don't mention what they do for a living. Simple solution would be to weed out "offending" profiles if mentioning the profession bothers you.
 SpielMitMir
Joined: 6/3/2008
Msg: 41
why do women include their employment
Posted: 5/25/2009 10:23:41 PM
I state what my job is because its a big part of who I am. I let everybody know from the door what I do. If you are a man that needs to see their g/f everyday. You shouldn't waste your time talking to me. It saves both of us a lot of time.
 Sheldon86
Joined: 11/4/2008
Msg: 44
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why do women include their employment
Posted: 5/26/2009 6:44:19 AM
Someone's employment is a huge selling point there bud.
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